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"Yeah, right. Plastic girls like you like to play with people's lives. You never think about the consequences of your actions or who you'll hurt."
My mouth goes wide. Is Nathan kidding?
I wouldn't kiss him as a joke, or even a dare. I kissed him because I wanted the upper hand. If he started liking me because of our kiss, I could control our relations.h.i.+p. I could make him hate me or like me. I admit it was manipulative.
Nathan's gla.s.ses slip on his nose and he pushes them back up. "I bet if I acted cool and dressed cool you'd dump that Avi guy and want to date me."
"Wanna bet?"
The door to the cafe opens. It's Avi.
And he doesn't look happy that I'm talking to Nathan. Nathan must sense my hesitation because he takes his iced tea without sweetener and stomps off to his usual chair to study.
Marla taps me on the shoulder. "You can go, Amy. Your s.h.i.+ft is up."
Thank the Lord.
I peel off the yellow ap.r.o.n. I lift myself on my tiptoes and give Avi a huge smooch while wrapping my arms around him.
That'll show him how much I missed him, Nathan how much Avi means to me, and everyone else (including Jessica) how important Avi is in my life.
Taking my cue, Avi wraps his arms around me. "Let's get out of here," he whispers against my mouth, then takes my hand and we leave the cafe together as a couple.
I think the ice has broken between us as we step out into the cold night air. My cell phone rings. It's my dad. "Hey, Aba," I say into my phone.
"Did you get a big surprise today?"
"Yep. He's standing right beside me."
I'll talk to my dad later about the new "no surprise rule" I'm about to set up.
"Let's all meet for dinner. How about Rosebud?"
Rosebud is an unbelievable Italian place on Rush Street right near our building. On a Sat.u.r.day night it's one of the most crowded restaurants in the city. "Sure."
"I'll be there in a half hour."
"Cool. See you there."
I hang up and hadn't even realized I was leading Avi away from our building and Rosebud. I notice we're not holding hands anymore. We're headed toward the beach even though Lake Michigan is freezing and the wind is blowing hard enough to make my face freeze up, making it hard to talk.
"I thought if I told you I was coming you'd tell me not to," Avi says. We're still walking, both of us looking straight ahead at the lake peeking through the city streets.
I want to grab his hand and hold it as we walk, but he's got both of his fists stuffed inside the front pockets of his jeans. "I thought you forgot about me," I say.
He gives a short laugh. "I didn't have time, Amy. I was in basic training, remember?"
I'm totally aware that other girls walking past us on the Chicago city streets are checking him out. Will it always be like that? Does he exude that charisma and confidence on purpose? "What if you did have time, Avi?" I ask him. "Would you find someone else, some pretty Israeli girl to replace me?"
"Why? So you wouldn't feel guilty starting a relations.h.i.+p with that guy Nathan?"
"I kissed you in front of him, Avi. Like I'd do that if I liked him."
"You did it to make him jealous," he says matter-of-factly.
"Did not. Besides, you don't even want a real relations.h.i.+p. You made that clear last summer.
No commitments, no boyfriend/girlfriend stuff. You know what I tell my friends ... that you're my non- boyfriend. Do you know how that makes me feel? Well, I'll tell you, Mr. Israeli Tough Guy. It makes me feel terrible, like I'm not worth the time or effort or emotion to put into a real relations.h.i.+p."
I swallow, but it's not easy because my throat is starting to close up from emotion.
Most of the time I try to keep my emotions deep inside, far from the surface. So this sucks, doubly so because it's Avi, the one person I don't want to get too emotional with because I know it'll just push him away.
He tries to pull me toward him, but I swat his hand away. I don't want his sympathy. I want his love.
What feels the worst is that I don't even think he's capable of giving it. G.o.d knows he'd never say it.
"I don't know what you want," he says, totally frustrated now. "Amy, I'm sorry. I thought we had this all worked out."
"Yeah, well, we don't. Why did you come here? Just to screw around with my life?"
"No," he says, pulling me into his chest and this time doesn't let me resist. Holding me tight, he whispers into my hair, "I finished combat basic training and am a.s.signed to a specialized fighting unit. The IDF is taking a different approach to terrorism; they're going to teach us how to think, act, and be the enemy." He takes a deep breath and says, "I don't know if I'll get authorization to contact you in the summer when you visit."
20.
Jacob had twelve sons. Each became one of the twelve tribes of Israel (Numbers 1:4).
I wonder what tribe my decendants are from.
I'm sure the Internet doesn't track birth records from that far back.
It takes a few minutes for me to comprehend what Avi just told me.
Specialized fighting unit. Being the enemy.
I pull back and look into his eyes. "We're supposed to see each other next summer when I come to visit. You promised me."
"I got time off now instead."
"Where are you going to be living in the summer?"
Avi gives me a small smile. "I'll be traveling a lot."
"In the Middle East?" I ask.
"Yes. And Europe."
"I don't like that," I tell him. "Not one bit." Taking a look at my watch, I realize we better head to Rosebud or my dad will be worried. "My dad's meeting us for dinner," I tell Avi, then start walking but I feel like I'm in a trance.
Avi takes his place right next to me.
"Did I freak you out?" he asks.
"Yep." Totally freaked me out. All these thoughts are running through my head, especially the ones where men are captured and tortured and mutilated. I mean, it's inhumane what's going on in the world. I seriously like my life right here, as safe as I could be in a big city like Chicago.
I'm silent the rest of the walk to Rosebud. My dad is already there, sitting and waiting at a table. He waves us over and stands up to shake Avi's hand and to pat him on the back. Does my dad know?
Does he have any idea Avi is about to risk his life for Israel just like he did at Avi's age?
I roll my eyes as they immediately start speaking in Hebrew, strange words and sounds pouring out of their mouths super fast. My phone vibrates with a text message. I read it under the table.
Jess: Where did you run off to?
Me: Dinner Jess: Avi ok?
Me: Yep.
Jess: Does he know you XOXOed Nathan?
Me: NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The waitress is standing over to our table, but the guys are oblivious.
"I'll have a c.o.ke," I tell her. "No ice.
No lemon." There's nothing worse than watered-down c.o.ke.
"Got it. And for the gentlemen?"
The gentlemen are gurgling and gargling their way through a very intense conversation. They're probably talking about Avi's army training because my dad is totally concentrated and impressed with whatever Avi's talking about. Boys and their gun talk ...
I just want to forget about guns and army and elite forces these next seven days. I'm going to treat his military service as if it doesn't exist. Ignorance keeps me sane sometimes. "When you're ready to speak Engish, just wake me up," I say, then lay my head down on the table.
"Sorry, sweetheart," my dad says. "I was just telling Avi your mom is pregnant."
"Thanks, Aba," I tell him sarcastically.
"I'm sure I couldn't have told him that myself." I don't understand why everyone in my life just can't keep their mouths shut.
As my temperature is rising and my heart is pounding, I feel Avi's hand reach under the table for mine. As soon as our fingers touch, I take a calming breath. It's as if Avi knew I was starting to panic about everything. He gets big brownie points for this.
Even though I'm usually carb-conscious, I can't resist the warm bread at Rosebud.
The loaf is crunchy on the outside and soft and warm on the inside. Taking the jug of olive oil, I pour some of the golden liquid onto my little appetizer plate and spoon parmesan cheese on top.
Avi is staring at me strangely. "What are you doing?"
"Tell me you've never dipped bread in oil and parmesan."
"I've dipped pita into hummus," he says.
"Not the same." I rip off a piece of bread and hand it to Avi. "Here, try it."
He tries it and nods. "That's awesome.
Totally unhealthy, but awesome."
When our dishes come, Avi digs in to his food with gusto.
His mouth is going to get spoiled eating Chicago food. We have the best restaurants in the entire country, the largest portions, and probably one of the highest obesity rates.
"Are you watching me eat?" Avi asks, slowing his chewing rate.
"I just want to make sure you like it."
"Amy, in the army you get eggs, jam, bread, and slow-cooked meat. As long as I'm not eating any of those, I'm in heaven."
My dad laughs, then goes into a long, detailed story on the horrible food they served when he was in the army. I stop listening when he talks about bees being stuck in the jam. The rest of the dinner is okay, except that it's mostly my dad and Avi talking and me just wondering when I can get some alone time with my non- boyfriend.
I guess now is better than ever to break it to my dad before he finds out from someone else. "Mutt kind of had an incident this afternoon at the dog park."
Both of them look at me.
"What kind of incident?" my dad asks.
I start peeling away the nail polish from the manicure I just had. "He sort of impregnated Princess. Well, I'm not one hundred percent sure, but Mr. Obermeyer seems to think he did and he's more of an expert on these things than I am."
My dad's hand slaps over his face and he squeezes his eyes shut. "Please tell me you're joking."
"Mr. Obermeyer almost called the police." Then I blurt out, "But he didn't, so it's okay."
"Okay? Okay? Amy, I told you Mutt needs to be fixed."
I throw my hands up in the air and say, "I get it, Dad."
"A little late, don't you think?"
I stand up, glad the meal is over, and start walking out of the restaurant. The last thing I need is for Avi to see me and my dad fight. He probably already thinks I'm the drama queen everyone accuses me of being.
Avi catches up to me at the front door.
"Amy," he calls out.