Frost's Laws and By-Laws of American Society Part 25

as:

"Messrs. d.i.c.k & FITZGERALD: "Gentlemen,"

Or,

"JOHN BROWN, ESQ.: "Dear sir."

The name of the place from which the letter is written, the date, the full name of writer and receiver, should be given in some part of a letter. The practice of heading a note "Monday," without a date, and signing it "Charlie," is very embarra.s.sing; it makes it difficult to answer a note unless immediately, when the day of the week can be readily identified with the day of the month, and when the receiver knows who his correspondent really is. Besides this, in the event of the letter miscarrying, it cannot be returned if there be no surname attached to the signature. A most important lawsuit in London was lost by a letter, of great value and significance otherwise, being dropped from the evidence for want of identification, being directed, "Dearest Tootings," and signed, "Your loving Poppets." It may seem absurd that a letter of weight could contain such silliness; but it was a fact.

Do not write on sc.r.a.ps of paper, as if your correspondence were not worth the cost of a proper sheet. Neither use old envelopes turned, as some people are wont to do.

Always be sure that your letter has sufficient stamps upon it to fully prepay its weight.

Do not enclose stamps for an answer unless the matter be a business one, and your own proper affair.

Should you send ma.n.u.script subject to approval to an editor, enclose stamps sufficient to pay for its return. You have no right to put another to this expense, especially as you already require from him a sacrifice of time, in order to look over what you have sent.

Anonymous communications are both cowardly and ill-bred. Under no circ.u.mstances should they be written. The fire is the only fit asylum for them when received. The Gunpowder Plot might have been revealed openhandedly, and the anonymous letter even in that case nearly missed its aim. The only anonymous communications which can be tolerated are the harmless missives called valentines. These, however, have fallen out of favor in polite society. Children and servants are the chief supporters of the manufacturers of the gorgeous love-letters.

In writing to a person who is the guest of another, take care to place the name of the host or hostess on the cover of your letter.

Some people address the letter in such a case to the host, and inscribe the name of their correspondent in the left-hand corner, thus:

JAMES GORDON, ESQ., No. 347 --- Street, New York.

For Mrs. T. C. BATES.

This practice is very likely to lead to an unintentional opening of the letter by the wrong person; for a cursory glance at the cover would seem to show that the letter was intended for the person whose name was most prominent. The letter should have been directed, to the person for whom it was intended first, thus:

Mrs. T. C. BATES, Care of JAMES GORDON, Esq., No. 347 --- Street, New York.

Unless very well acquainted with your correspondent, do not use terms implying intimacy.

Business letters usually commence with "Sir," "Gentlemen," "Dear Sir," or "Dear Sirs," and end with, "I am, Sir (or Gentlemen), Your obedient servant," etc.

Official letters invariably begin with the t.i.tle of the person addressed, and then "Sir," if a civilian or the rank of an officer.

If the letter be to the head of a Department, to a high Government official, or to a superior officer, it is customary to write in a strain a little more deferential than ordinary, so that, instead of saying, as you would to a friend, "I have to acquaint you," "I have to acknowledge the receipt of your letter," you would say, "I have the honor to acknowledge." The ending, too, of such letters should be slightly different: "I have the honor to be, General, Your obedient servant," taking the place of "I am, sir," etc.

In official communications, margins are always left, so as to allow of notations being made for the purpose of framing an answer, and the backs of the pages should be left blank for the same purpose. It is not customary to write down quite to the bottom of the page, but to take ample room for the substance of the letter.

Unless writing officially, or to some public person, it is not customary in this country to give a man all the t.i.tles which may belong to him.

Remember that "brevity is the soul of wit." Let your letters be concisely written, not too bluntly, but in a clear, straightforward style, going at once to the subjects you desire to mention, with as little preamble as possible. Use the pa.s.sive instead of the active voice. To do so prevents the continual thrusting forward of the first person singular into the letter, and gives a more modest appearance to the text.

Short notes to strangers on business--as, for instance, in reference to the character of a servant, asking for some information, etc.--should be written in the third person singular, thus:

"Mrs. Wright presents her compliments to Mrs. Left, and will feel greatly obliged by any information respecting the character and qualifications of Jane Broom, who has applied for a situation as housemaid in Mrs. Wright's household.

"No.27 F--- Street, Jan 9th, 1869."

The answer should also be written in the third person, and should contain as much information as possible relative to the points inquired about, stating whether the servant is honest, sober, and truthful, and what is her experience of her disposition and habits.

In writing to a servant, or to one considerably below your own station, the following form may be used:

"Jane Broom is hereby informed that Mrs. Wright is willing to engage her as housemaid from the 15th of January, 1869.

"No. 27 F Street, Jan. 10th, 1869." Or this:

"Jane Broom--your character is satisfactory, and you can enter my service on Sat.u.r.day, the 15th of January."

Or this:

"Mrs. Wright is satisfied with Jane Broom's character, and informs her that she may enter Mrs. Wright's service as housemaid on Sat.u.r.day next."

In sending any communication to a newspaper or magazine, address to "The Editor," and not to any private person connected with the publication. By so doing, you will better secure attention than if you trouble the editor at his own house by addressing him by his own name. Besides this, some one may be acting for the editor, and if he sees the packet addressed to the name of the absentee, he will not feel free to open it, but will send it to him, whereby confusion and delay, possibly loss of the ma.n.u.script, may ensue.

There are six parts to every letter: the date, the complimentary address, the body of the letter, the complimentary closing, the signature, the address or superscription; thus:

(Date) PETERSBURG, Va., June 18th, 1869.

(Complimentary address) JAMES MUNROE, Esq.:

DEAR Sir: (Body of the letter) Your most welcome letter, announcing your intention of visiting our city, reached me this morning. I hasten to answer to beg that you will make my house your home during your stay, and inform me by what train I may expect you, that I may meet you at the depot. Leaving all else for the first conversation,

(Complimentary closing) I am, my dear friend,

YOURS VERY TRULY, (_Signature_) P. T. JONES.

(_Address or Superscription_) JAMES MUNROE, ESQ., Bangor, Maine.

THE LADY'S TOILET.

PERHAPS, in these days of public and private baths, it may seem a work of supererogation to insist upon cleanliness as the first requisite in a lady's toilet. Yet it may be as well to remind our fair readers that fastidiousness on this head cannot be carried too far. Cleanliness is the outward sign of inward purity.

Cleanliness is health, and health is beauty.

We will begin, then, with the business of the dressing-room, which can be quite well performed in three-quarters of an hour, or even less; and should at latest be achieved by eight o'clock in summer, and nine in winter. To sleep too much is as trying to the const.i.tution as to sleep too little. To sleep too much is to render oneself liable to all kinds of minor ailments, both of mind and body. It is a habit that cannot be too severely censured, especially in the young. No mother has any right to allow her young daughters to ruin their temper, health, and complexion, by lying in bed till nine or ten o'clock. Early rising conduces more to the preservation of health, freshness, and young looks, than anything in the world, and even to the proper preservation of our mental faculties.

The bath is a most important object of study. It is not to be supposed that we wash in order to become clean; we wash because we wish to remain clean. The bath should be taken by a person in good health once a day in winter, and twice a day in summer. For persons of really robust const.i.tutions, a cold shower-bath may be recommended; but as a general rule the sponge-bath is safest and most convenient. Cold water refreshes and invigorates, but does not cleanse; those persons, therefore, who daily use a cold bath in the morning should frequently use a warm one at night. For cleansing purposes, the water should be of from ninety-six to one hundred degrees, or even one hundred and eight degrees; but such a bath should be sparingly indulged in, as it exhausts the physical powers.

A tepid bath, varying from eighty-five to ninety-five degrees, is perhaps the safest for general use, the more particulary as it answers the purpose both of refres.h.i.+ng and cleansing. It is not well to remain in the bath for longer than two or three minutes. A large coa.r.s.e sponge is best for the purpose. It is advisable to wet the top of the head before entering a cold bath. Whether soap be used or not, it is well to apply the flesh-brush gently to the face and vigorously to the whole body. Nothing improves the complexion like the daily use of the flesh-brush. When the brus.h.i.+ng is concluded, a huck-a-back or Turkish towel should be used for the final process of drying.

The teeth must be scrupulously cared for. If proper care were taken of the teeth in youth, there would be less employment for the dentist in after life. The Americans ruin their teeth by drinking iced drinks with hot dinners; the Spanish ladies by eating sugar all day long; the Mexicans by smoking cigarettes.

Very hot and very sweet things should be avoided. The teeth should be carefully brushed, not only night and morning, but after every meal. Very hard tooth-brushes are not advisable, and a simple tooth-powder of common chalk is safer and more effectual than any quackeries. The onion, we need scarcely observe, must be the forbidden fruit of the Eve of the nineteenth century. Indigestible food is also certain to affect the sweetness of the breath. As soon as the breath becomes unpleasant, one may be quite sure that the digestive machinery is out of order.

The nails must always be fastidiously clean, and never allowed to grow inordinately long. In the cutting of the nails, every care must be given to the preservation of the shape, and to the removal of superfluous skin. A liberal use of the nail-brush, warm water, and best Windsor soap will insure the preservation of a delicate hand. Gloves must of course be worn out of doors; and even in doors as much as possible.

The hair requires a good deal of care, though of the simplest and most inartificial kind. The secret of fine and glossy hair is a clean hair-brush; and ladies who keep no maid to perform those offices for them should wash their hair-brushes in hot water and soda every day. Every other day is the minimum of was.h.i.+ng that a hair-brush should have.

Once secure the perfect cleanliness of your hair-brush, and the rest will be easy. Brush the hair carefully both at night and morning; let it be occasionally cleansed with yolk of egg beaten up, or a mixture of glycerine and lime-juice, and you will find no need to resort to hair-doctors or quacks. Pomade and oil are strictly to be avoided; but after a sea-water bath, or during a sea journey, a little warm pomade will be useful in softening the hair.

Above all things, never attempt to change the color of the hair by means of fas.h.i.+onable dyes and fluids. Color so obtained cannot harmonize naturally with the skin, eyes, and eyebrows that Nature has given. Practices of this kind are simply and strictly immodest. They evince a senseless desire for fas.h.i.+on, and an equally senseless eagerness to attract. Auricomus hair-dyes, like painted lips and cheeks, and pencilled eyebrows, and complexions purchased, are disgraceful to the wearers. With regard to the art of obtaining a good complexion, let ladies be careful in regard to diet, take regular exercise in the open air, wear broad-brimmed hats in the sun, and veils in the wind; let them avoid pearl powders and washes of every kind; let them, above all things, go early to bed, and rise betimes in the morning; and if by so doing they are not made "beautiful forever," they can never be made so.