A Singular Metamorphosis - LightNovelsOnl.com
You're reading novel online at LightNovelsOnl.com. Please use the follow button to get notifications about your favorite novels and its latest chapters so you can come back anytime and won't miss anything.
But for the timely arrival of a servant on the scene, bearing a message for Miss Fiske, there is no determining when the above conversation would have ended. One of the disputants was longing to put an end to it as speedily as possible, or at least, as quickly as was consistent with even a show of politeness; the other was putting forth every effort to prolong it without impunity. To risk all would be to lose all. He was not certain that there was anything to lose, that anything had ever been gained. For all the benefit accruing to either from the conversation it might as well have never taken place. As they leisurely strolled towards the house, both remained silent, neither desiring to break the silence, whether from feelings of constraint or from varied emotions, it would be difficult to learn. While Adelina's thoughts were, perhaps, less sad than those of her admirer, they were at least, far from enviable, commingled as they were with this recent event, and the one of former years. Doubtless she was thinking partly of what Mr. Burnett was thinking of her, and what she would say to that other whose arrival she had just witnessed. Tom Burnett had evidently concluded that "the better part of valor is discretion," for there was no pursuance of the talk, even when he found they were nearing the doorway. Only a quiet "good-by"
from him. That was all he said to the girl who knew she had his happiness in her keeping, but whom he never once blamed, knowing with her conscience was all, and that she would follow its dictates, meriting thus always the love he had chosen to bestow upon her. Chosen? No; surely, that word is misapplied, for who ever chooses to love? Does love not rather come unawares to the non-suspecting? and does not the word rightly interpreted tell of an utter forgetfulness of self, implying only disinterested feelings; precluding entirely the idea of selection, which alone would mean something premeditated?
CHAPTER IV.
THE MEETING.
Adelina found Mary awaiting her, and, though, secretly delighting in the interruption, learned that there was really no reason for her being summoned, except Mary's wish to discuss recent events, and the desire to hasten a meeting between the two young people. The young girl read the question Mary longed to ask, and answered it accordingly, "I have seen him."
"He is much better than we ever dared to expect. He seems never to have been troubled by the strange malady we know has existed, save for one illusion. Twice he has spoken of his indebtedness to us for the care of his brother. It is clearly a case of mistaken ident.i.ty. Ralph thinks the man, for whom we have cared, was his brother. As I said, his loss of such consciousness, is all that remains of his former trouble. Perhaps he did have a brother," Mary ended thoughtfully.
"Yes," replied Adelina, "he has mentioned a brother, though I have often wondered why he never told me more concerning him."
"The gentleman who accompanied Ralph is his physician, Dr. Ellis. He said that Ralph was so anxious to come, and that he was so imprudent he needed some one to watch him."
"Did Dr. Ellis use the word 'watch' before Ralph?" asked Adelina indignantly.
"Yes, but only to convey physical deficiency."
"And where is Ralph now?" asked Adelina.
"With Harold, in the library. Let us go there now. Dr. Ellis left on the plea of other engagements, but partly, I think, to leave us alone with Ralph this first evening. Aside from professional feelings, he seems to take the greatest interest in Ralph."
By this time the speakers had reached the library door, where Mary paused as if to give her young friend a moment for preparation. Adelina, however, desired to make a speedy entrance, which would admit of no time for deliberation. She felt that if she had time to consider the prospective meeting, a feeling of constraint would follow. The most carefully prepared language remains unuttered when one is brought face to face with the contingency. Memory fails, leaving only a trace of forgotten eloquence, which is sufficient to render us speechless, knowing as we do, that aught said now, must ever be inferior to the expressions formulated in quieter moments. Adelina straightway entered the room. Ralph turned quickly, as though in recognition of her step. He came eagerly forward and took the proffered hand, looking searchingly into the girl's eyes. What he read there was not the indifference he had contemplated, prior to his arrival at Deanmouth. A faint flush suffused Adelina's cheek, and, as if to conceal her emotion, she uttered some polite triviality, which, it is safe to say, was not remembered by her.
Harold left them, ostensibly on some forgotten errand.
Adelina looked after his retreating form longingly, but remembered that Mary had not forsaken her. To her surprise, she found, on glancing around, that Mary had not even entered with her. Ralph Bamford had differing views as to the desirability of additional company, as was testified by his readiness to enter into conversation, while inwardly blessing Harold for his considerate departure.
"It is such a pleasure to be here," he said. "How I have longed to see you." Then, afraid of his own audacity, emended the last sentence by saying: "Yes, I have often thought of the old place and its occupants."
"It seems to me that we might have been mentioned first, besides it is not long since you saw the place."
"Only a matter of three years. There is, I believe, one accepted mode for the computation of time, which is universally utilized by the enlightened, however we may disagree in the lapse of it. To me three years is no short time."
"What can you mean? You were----" Adelina broke off, horrified at her want of thought; for had she not promised to be all carefulness?
Already she found herself endeavoring to recall to Ralph his other sojourns at the same place under such inauspicious circ.u.mstances. She could not proceed with the self-interrupted sentence, even though she was aware that the pause was noticed by Ralph; yet, surely, it was but natural that Adelina should remind him of his former visits to the place. He had seemed so like his old self that she was certain he would remember the visit of only a year ago. She scarce knew what to answer, when Ralph said with a most surprised look:
"What is the matter? Have I returned sooner than you expected?"
There was reproach as well as surprise in the query. Adelina was pained by the lapse of memory, supposedly inconsistent with the soundness of mind she had commenced to think had been restored to him. Of course the young man attributed her silence to indifference, which state she was far from feeling. The situation was certainly a strange one. There was the lover hanging on the antic.i.p.ated reply, and longing for a denial of his hasty words; the woman fearing to utter some word which would either wound him, or intensify the mental failure of which the young man himself was totally oblivious. As soon as Adelina perceived her error, she tried to retrieve it by diverting Ralph's attention, refraining carefully from setting him aright concerning his mistaken a.s.severation; but the young man was not to be diverted by other channels of thought from the question at issue. Having noted Adelina's confusion, he had asked for the cause, and finding one question unanswered, had supplemented it by another. He was growing impatient. Why did Adelina act so unlike herself? Surely, there was nothing to conceal. It was not as though he was a stranger; though, to his amazement, he found he was being treated as such; why, he had known her capable of giving the most evasive replies in the sweetest manner to the most direct interrogations, and never had she appeared so ill at ease to him. Did two persons ever more thoroughly misunderstand each other, or so fail in penetrating the other's thoughts? There could not even be a reconciliation when no wrong had been committed; there was only the breach which neither could cross. Only a feeling of misery, blank and hopeless remained, which it seemed time only could a.s.suage.
Adelina felt as strongly as Ralph her utter inability to talk; the mere fact that she was so thoroughly misunderstood widened the breach. If she could only have explained to Ralph the cause of her hesitation,--but no, she knew she never could.
Even if Ralph was ever his true self again, Adelina knew that even to spare herself she would never hurt him by such an explanation, an explanation entailing a revelation of the symptoms and various stages of his disease. If it necessitated such indelicacy, she felt that she would prefer being misjudged. This was only theory. She had not been put to the test. How can we answer for what we shall do in a given instance?
Adelina was the first to rally, and was beginning to speak, when the door-k.n.o.b was imperatively rattled by something intent upon letting its wants be known.
"It must be Watch," said Adelina, after she had discovered whence the sound issued.
"An intelligent dog," answered Ralph, "and certainly very active for his years. I am ashamed to say I had almost forgotten his existence."
"You wouldn't if you stayed long," said Adelina, as she hastened to the door. Accustomed as she was to the rather rough canine greetings, she concealed herself behind the door without looking at the supposed dog as she opened a way for his entrance. A small voice said, "I want to tome in."
"That much is evident," laughingly put in Ralph, as Adelina emerged from her hiding place.
"Is that you, Pet?" she asked. "Come and speak to Mr. Bamford."
"Is oo mawwied to him?" asked the child, innocently.
"If we only were," said Ralph to himself, perhaps not intended to be in so low a tone as not to reach the desired quarter.
"Do oo weally want to be?" questioned the child, of Ralph, who had drawn her onto his knee.
"Did you come alone?" was the irrelevant answer.
"'Es; I'se not afwaid. I tan thee my houth fwom here."
"Our rector, Mr. Bayne, is her father," explained Adelina. "We are the greatest of friends," she added.
"Who? You and Mr. Bayne?" asked Ralph.
"No, the child, of course."
Pet, not caring to be excluded from the conversation, and feeling a monopoly unfair, persisted in obtaining a solution to the subject uppermost in her baby mind.
"Won't oo tell Pet?" she said. "Do oo want to det mawwied?"
Receiving still no reply, and in no wise diverted from her curiosity, she continued to enlarge on the subject.
"Papa'll mawwy oo. I'll wun ast him now. Pet fordets," she said, slipping off Ralph's knee ere he was aware of her intention.
"Oh, stop her," cried Adelina, with energy, but so horrified that she could do nothing herself to intercept the childish form. Ralph hurried to the door just in time, and caught the child in his arms.
She looked disappointed.
"Pet fordets," she reiterated.
"You will never get me to believe that," laughed Ralph, remembering her former perseverance. Seeing that Pet did not understand, he kissed her and said he wanted her to stay with him. Adelina had retired to the farthest corner of the room. At first, she was half angry with the child; but later, amus.e.m.e.nt was the predominating sensation. Presently Pet's voice was heard asking where Ada was, so the latter stepped forward. Ralph's eyes were dancing mischievously.
"You do not mind the baby's prattle, surely?" said he, lest Adelina would deem his ill-concealed merriment untimely and unprecedented.
The child had brought a change of atmosphere. The two older persons seemed to breathe a different air. Adelina had been troubled at Pet's extreme candor; though, meanwhile admiring the parents who so early had instilled that virtue. Pet had looked with wide-eyed wonder at the two who could wish her to keep anything from her father.
"I always tell papa evwything," she urged.
"But this is not about yourself, dear," said Adelina, trying to put it so the little one would understand.