The Frontier - LightNovelsOnl.com
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"Then, if you love me, why do you repel me? Surely, when one loves, one does not repel the thing one loves.... And you love me...."
The pretty mouth was all entreaty. Philippe observed its voluptuous action. It was as though the two lips delighted in uttering words of love and as though they could p.r.o.nounce no others.
He turned away his eyes to escape the fascination and, controlling himself, mastering his voice so that she might not perceive its tremor, he said:
"It is just because I love you, Suzanne, that I am repulsing you ...
because I love you too well...."
The phrase implied a breach which she felt to be irreparable. She did not attempt to protest. It was finished. And she knew this so thoroughly that, a moment later, when Philippe opened the door and prepared to go away, she did not even raise her head.
He did not go, however, for fear of offending her. He sat down. There was only a little table between them. But how far he was from her! And how it must surprise her that all her feminine wiles, her coquetry, the allurement of her lips were powerless to subjugate the will of that man who loved her!
The belfry-clock struck ten. When Morestal and Jorance arrived, Suzanne and Philippe had not exchanged a single word.
"Ready to start, Philippe?" cried Morestal. "Have you said good-bye to Suzanne?"
She replied:
"Yes, we have said good-bye."
"Well, then it's my turn," he said, kissing her. "Jorance, it's settled that you're coming with us."
"As far as the b.u.t.te-aux-Loups."
"If you go as far as the b.u.t.te," said Suzanne to her father, "you may just as well go on to the Old Mill and come back by the high-road."
"That's true. But are you staying behind, Suzanne?"
She decided to see them out of Saint-elophe. She quickly wrapped a silk scarf round her head:
"Here I am," she said.
The four of them walked off, along the sleeping streets of the little town, and Morestal at once began to comment on his interview with Captain Daspry. A very intelligent man, the captain, who had not failed to see the importance of the Old Mill as a block-house, to use his expression. But, from another point of view, he had given something of a shock to Morestal's opinions on the att.i.tude which a French officer should maintain towards his inferiors.
"Just imagine, Philippe: he refuses to punish the soldiers I told him about ... you know, the pillagers whom Saboureux complained of.... Well, he refuses to punish them ... even the leader of the band, one Duvauchel, a lover of every country but his own, who glories in his ideas, they say. Can you understand it? The rascal escapes with a fine of ten francs, an apology, a promise not to do it again and a lecture from his captain! And Mossieu Daspry pretends that, with kindness and patience, he succeeds in turning Duvauchel and fellows of his kidney into his best soldiers! What humbug! As though there were any way of taming those beggars, short of discipline! A pack of good-for-nothing scoundrels, who would fly across the frontier the moment the first shot was fired!"
Philippe had instinctively slackened his pace. Suzanne was walking beside him; and, every now and then, by the light of an electric lamp, he saw the golden halo of her hair and the delicate profile draped in the silk scarf.
He felt full of gentleness for her, now that he no longer feared her, and he was tempted to speak kind words to her, as to a little sister of whom one is very fond. But the silence was sweeter still and he did not wish to break its charm.
They pa.s.sed the last houses. The street ran into a white country-road, lined with tall poplars. And they heard sc.r.a.ps of Morestal's conversation:
"Oh, yes! Captain Daspry! Leniency, friendly relations between superiors and inferiors, the barracks looked upon as a school of brotherhood, with the officers for instructors! That's all very well; but do you know what a system of that sort leads to? An army of deserters and renegades...."
Suzanne said, in a low voice:
"May I have your arm, Philippe?"
He at once slipped his arm through hers, happy at the thought of pleasing her. And he felt, besides, a great relief at seeing that she leant against him with the confidence of a friend. They were going to part and nothing would tarnish the pure memory of that day. It was a comforting impression, which nevertheless caused him a certain sadness.
Duty fulfilled always leaves a taste of bitterness behind. The intoxication of sacrifice no longer stimulates you; and you begin to understand what you have refused.
In the warm night, amid all the perfumes that stirred in the breeze, Suzanne's own scent was wafted up to him. He inhaled it long and greedily and reflected that no scent had ever excited him before:
"Good-bye," he said, within himself. "Good-bye, little girl; good-bye to what was my love."
And, during those last minutes, as though he were granting a crowning grace to his impossible longings and his forbidden dreams, he yielded to the delights of that love which had blossomed so mysteriously in the unknown regions of his soul.
"Good-bye," Suzanne now said. "Good-bye, Philippe."
"Are you going?"
"Yes, or else my father would come back with me; and I want n.o.body ...
n.o.body...."
Jorance and old Morestal had stopped near a bench, at a place where two paths met, the wider of which, the one on the left, climbed up towards the frontier. The spot was known as the Carrefour du Grand Chene, or Great Oak Crossways.
Morestal kissed the girl again:
"Good-bye, for the present, Suzanne. And don't forget that I'm coming to your wedding."
He pressed the spring of his repeater:
"I say, Philippe, it's a quarter past ten.... True, there's no hurry....
Your mother and Marthe must be asleep by now. No matter, let's get on...."
"Look here, father, if you don't mind, I would rather take the direct road.... The path by the b.u.t.te-aux-Loups is longer; and I am feeling rather tired."
In reality, like Suzanne, Philippe wanted to go home alone, so that nothing might disturb the melancholy charm of his dream. Old Morestal's long speeches terrified him.
"As you please, my boy," cried the old man. "But mind you don't put up the bolt or the chain on the hall-door."
Jorance impressed the same injunctions on Suzanne and the two walked away.
"Good-bye, Philippe," said the girl, once again.
He had already entered the path on the right.
"Good-bye, Suzanne," he said.
"Give me your hand, Philippe."
For his hand to reach Suzanne's, he had to turn two or three steps back. He hesitated. But she had come towards him and, very gently, drew him to the foot of the path:
"Philippe, we must not part like this.... It is too sad! Let us go back together to Saint-elophe ... as far as the house.... Please do...."
"No," he said, curtly.