The Shades Of Time And Memory Part 1

The Shades of Time and Memory.

The Second Book of the Wraeththu Histories.

Storm Constantine.

Introduction.

In the early times, two events specifically shook the world of Wraeththu from its innermost core to its outermost etheric body. The first was when Pellaz-har-Aralis, who eventually became Tigron of Immanion, died and was reborn into new flesh. Only the most insensitive hara remained unaffected by that, and even they were no doubt plagued for several days afterward, by strange dreams and unaccountable bad tempers.

The second event was, in some ways, more dramatic and devastating than the first and this was when Calanthe, erstwhile chesnari of Pellaz, stalked like a dark angel into Immanion and faced Thiede, progenitor of all Wraeththu, in his inner sanctum.

Some say they fought for possession of Pellaz, others that they warred for power, and yet more claimed that it was a symbolic preordained ritual, in which Thiede transcended the boundaries of earthly existence and fulfilled his ultimate potential. Around the world, different tribes cling to different versions of the myth and you can be sure their particular preferences flavour greatly the context of their spiritual beliefs.

What is known for certain is that Calanthe went to Immanion, the city of the Gelaming, and claimed what he believed was his. Pellaz was left without Thiede, his mentor and creator. With Thiede gone, who knew what would happen? At that time, Wraeththu knew so little about themselves and Thiede had left them without sharing any of the knowledge he had. Had Cal liberated Wraeththu from a harsh dictator, or left them vulnerable and ignorant with no greater power to protect them? Only time would tell.

For most hara, when the phoenix of Wraeththu was newly-hatched from an egg of flame and still in danger of falling from the nest, the only way to receive information from halfway across the world was through the subtle ethers, and much of what is channelled from this puzzling realm is subject to personal interpretation, error and bias.

Immanion lies in the heart of Almagabra, a warm country whose landscape seethes with ancient spirits and capricious G.o.ds. An implacable ocean lies between this land and Megalithica to the west. News, as it was carried across the waves, was often changed or forgotten completely. Sometimes, when a snippet of information reached some cold forgotten corner in the north of Megalithica, it was nothing more than a worn out thread, a ghost of a whisper or a lie. When information such as this became intertwined with a har's psychic vision, you could almost guarantee the conclusion he reached about what really happened bore no resemblance whatsoever to the truth. In such ways were new myths made, expanded upon and believed. Pellaz and Calanthe became a legend, to be feared or adored according to your beliefs and where you lived.

Many hara had good reason to fear the Gelaming, the tribe who believed themselves to be the greatest of all. For, in Gelaming eyes, if you did not ascribe to their beliefs, you were an enemy of all Wraeththukind. Sometimes, the Gelaming were right in this a.s.sumption, but sometimes not. If your history was suspect, it was best to hide it and flee to a far location, like the City of Ghosts in Northern Megalithica. Best to forget the name of your previous tribe and pray that nohar came looking for you. Better still: keep your secrets to yourself.

Chapter One.

In the early mornings, just after dawn, when the sky was salmon pink and mists curled across the water, and birds flew like the last of dark dreams escaping the shattered towers of the old human city, Moon Jaguar would walk to the edge of the world and stare out to the place where the phantoms lived.

The creatures that lived within the Sea of Ghosts would often come to land and wrap themselves around the broken towers on the sh.o.r.e. The mist beings could make parts of the world disappear and reappear, and they moved quickly. It was best to pay them respect.

Seven Wraeththu clans lived in the ruins of the city, and at one time they had been Uigenna, though prudence had forced them to change their name and their customs, following the Gelaming invasion of Megalithica. Now, they had no tribal name, and in time, no doubt, the clans themselves would become separate tribes, but for now they existed in tenuous alliance.

Moon's father, Snake Jaguar, had come from a land far to the south, but he would never speak of it, no matter how much Moon begged or pleaded for old stories that all harlings loved. Snake was the shaman of the Jaguar clan and held in great esteem by their ruler, Great Jaguar Paw. Moon lived with his father, and his father's protector, Raven Jaguar, in the House of Relics, situated very close to the sh.o.r.e of the Sea of Ghosts. Humans had filled the Reliquary with artefacts that recorded moments of their history, but most of the artefacts had been destroyed during the conflict that had brought the city to her knees some thirty or so years before.

Moon liked the Reliquary: its cavernous dark rooms, its shattered display cases, the bones spilling amid the gla.s.s shards. His own room, high in the building, had probably once been an office, although over time he had adorned it with various items he'd filched from the lower galleries. His father lived in the far side of the building, and Raven lived in a store room nearby, his senses forever on high alert in case Snake should need him. Moon presumed Raven had got to know Snake long before the fragmented Uigenna tribe had had to flee to the north, pursued by Gelaming patrols that were intent on rehabilitating any hara whose beliefs did not emulate their own. Raven lived in ascetic simplicity, in what was hardly more than a broom closet. It was obvious something very bad had happened to him in the past and that it had affected his mind. Now, Raven's dedication to Snake was his entire reason for being. They were not chesna, nor did they ever take aruna together, which in Wraeththu terms was most unusual, if not freakish. They shared secrets and pain, and this, more than physical or emotional expressions of affection, bound them close. Snake too was damaged. Even though Moon lived far from his father, sometimes at night he could hear him limping around his room, never weeping, never sighing just pacing slowly.

Moon was seven years old, nearly adult, and by then he had realised that other harlings of the clan avoided him, because his father was strange. Even Great Jaguar Paw feared Snake, because his temperament was inclined to prophesy doom rather than joy. The privacy-loving Jaguar clan skulked around the sh.o.r.e of the Sea of Ghosts and interacted with other clans only for trade. Snake, so the other clans said, made sure the rest of the Jaguars were as grim as he was.

A week or so after his seventh birthday, which he'd celebrated alone, Moon went as usual to the sh.o.r.e. Looking back at the Reliquary, Moon realised for the first time that his father, Raven and himself, although occupying in some regard the same s.p.a.ce, lived in isolation from each other. There were not even ghosts for company. Since Snake's chesnari had died, not long after Moon's birth, the idea of family had shattered in the same way the relics had. Moon did not feel lonely he never did but today he felt different: an echo of some early childhood warning travelled across the great sea.

The dawn was pink and grey, stealing through brooding cloud and there was a metallic taint to the air. A s.h.i.+p sailed through the mist towards the docks, some distance to the east. Somehar in the rigging blew a mournful salute upon a windhorn. Birds looped drunkenly around the black mast. Moon squatted on the cracked concrete walkway above the water and stared at the s.h.i.+p, with his hands funnelled around his eyes. He thought about strolling over to the docks to see who or what might have arrived, but then the vague aches that had plagued his belly for some weeks intensified into a cramping pain and he had to lean forward to vomit into the water.

Moon, like all hara, was rarely ill, so this particular seizure, which could not be ignored, filled him with panic. In some places the land was poisoned, and those poisons were strong enough even to kill a har. Moon rarely left his immediate environment, so couldn't imagine how he could have come into contact with such danger, but now, when he stared out over the water, his whole vision was tinged with red and he had a pain in the back of his neck. He was afraid that, if he moved too quickly, some part of himself might fall out of his body. He was poisoned and he was too far away from the Reliquary to call for help.

Moon curled up into a ball on the ground and lay that way for a long time. By the time the sun had hauled itself out of the mist, he realised he had slept and now felt better. But when he got to his feet, he had to hold his stomach with both hands, because it felt loose and unsafe. His skin was crawling as if ants were marching all over it. Slowly, and with great care, he made his way to his father's domain, because despite the fact they rarely spent time together, Snake was the one har Moon trusted in the world.

Raven had already been to Snake's room to deliver breakfast, which the shaman was now eating in a slow and dignified manner. Snake Jaguar's named derived mainly from the appearance of his eyes. One was very dark, almost black, while the other, on his damaged side, was bright gold. This was his snake eye, his seeing eye, and with it he could see into any har's soul, so he was required to keep it covered, out of politeness, for most of the time. His face was very beautiful, unmarked, and so was the right side of his body, but the left side was maimed. A chemical fire, so strong that not even a harish frame could recover from its cruel breath, had ruined him, created his golden eye, and had consumed entirely the har named Silken whom Snake had loved and who had been Moon's hostling. It had been an accident: no rogue hara or humans had done it. Evil had come out of the ground, evil that had waited so long for release, it had became impatient with antic.i.p.ating human or harish detonation. It had erupted from the ground on its own, to burn out in a moment of glory, which had unfortunately incinerated seven hara of the clans and injured a further three. Two of those had later died, but Snake had survived. To a normal har, to be less than perfect was anathema. Snake, however, appeared barely to care about such things. He lived, for the most part, inside his own head.

Now, Moon went to his father and knelt before him. He said, 'Tiahaar, am I to die?'

Snake raised his head. Ropes of black hair hung over his face, down to the floor, and from between these ophidian coils the golden eye glowed, while the black eye contemplated the darkest reaches of the universe. 'What is this?' Snake asked.

Moon explained, as best he could.

Snake continued to eat his breakfast, listening intently. Then, when his son finished speaking, he said, 'Moon, you are becoming adult, that is all. Go to Raven. He will instruct you in these matters.' His expression was distant. He did not look Moon in the eye.

Moon had expected something more dramatic than this. 'A s.h.i.+p came,' he said. 'A black s.h.i.+p.'

'Unneah from the south,' Snake said. 'They bring little of value, but later you might go over to the docks and barter for tobacco for me.'

'How far south?'

'Not far enough,' Snake said. He reached for his staff and began to struggle to his feet. Moon jumped up to help him.

'Will we ever go home?' he asked.

'I doubt it,' Snake said, for a moment allowing himself to lean upon the shoulder of his son. 'Why do you ask now?'

'I don't know. I wonder what it was like.'

'Go to Raven now,' Snake said, pulling away. 'Tell him that I have sent you.'

Moon rarely communicated with Raven, even though Raven was supposed to have raised him after his hostling's death. Raven was always so taciturn and preoccupied with his dedication to guarding Snake that Moon had raised himself without realising he had done so. Why Snake should send him to Raven now, Moon was unsure. He doubted that Raven could teach him anything, because he was as wrapped up in his private world as Snake was.

Raven's eyes were discomfortingly entirely black, so you could never be sure what he was thinking, if indeed he thought at all. His skin was very dark, like that of a panther and his face looked like the sculpture of a mythical king. He, more than any other har of the clan, was most like the big cat from which they'd taken their name. He could sit motionless for hours, staring at a single thing. Then he could strike, and take a bird from the air so quickly, nohar could really see it. Moon didn't like him very much, although he wasn't consciously aware of that. He interacted with too few hara to understand the concepts of like and dislike.

Moon found Raven on the Reliquary grounds, tending their vegetable patch. He moved with precise gracefulness, in what to Moon that day seemed an annoying manner. His thick black braids, which hung to his thighs, were bound at his neck by a single braid, to keep them from dangling over his work.

'Snake says you are to instruct me,' Moon said.

Raven fixed his attention upon Moon and said, 'In what regard?'

'He says I am becoming adult and that I should come to you. He said to tell you he'd sent me.'

Raven stared at him in his usual impenetrable manner for some seconds, then snapped, 'He said this?'

'Yes. What must I learn?'

Raven turned away. He seemed troubled. 'I am not a good teacher,' he said. 'There is too much I have forgotten.'

'Perhaps we should go to the docks instead. A s.h.i.+p has come. Snake wants tobacco.'

Raven said nothing. He stood with his back to Moon for what seemed like an hour, but was probably less than a minute. Then he began carefully to put away his tools and tidy up his work area. Moon waited impatiently. He was thinking of the docks and the aroma of cooking sugar-dough from the food stalls that lined its perimeter. He had not yet eaten.

Raven had finished his work. 'Come,' he said, and beckoned for Moon to follow him.

'I'm hungry,' Moon said, trailing behind.

They went into the small orchard, near to the run where the hens scampered about. When they saw Raven approaching, they all rushed to the netting, squawking and flattening their wings against the ground in devotion.

'I felt ill,' Moon said. 'This morning I was sick.' They were in a circle of trees and the air felt very different there, still and close.

'It is feybraiha that you are going through,' Raven said.

'What's that?'

'The advent of s.e.xual maturity. You will be able to create harlings of your own now.'

'Why would I want to do that?' Years ago, when Snake had been somewhat more communicative, he had taught his son about his own kind. He had told him about aruna and how it could be used for spiritual growth, for creating harlings or simply for pleasure. Moon hadn't thought about it much since, mainly because it was not something that figured in their routine domestic life. Snake and Raven were not like normal hara in that respect. Now, feeling as if iced water was filling up his veins, Moon began to remember what he'd been told, that one day his body would be ready for aruna and when that time came he must see to its desires. He faced this har he did not even particularly like and asked, 'What must I do?'

'Nothing,' said Raven. 'You must be aware of what this will do to you. It will wake you up. You will never be able to sleep again.'

'I don't believe you,' Moon said.

Raven almost smiled. 'I'm trying to tell you about a new responsibility you will have. Your body will wake up, and you must look after its needs.'

'What about your body?'

Raven didn't answer. He simply began to take off his clothes, so that Moon could see the pale scars against his dark brown skin, scores of them, down his back and along his right flank. It looked like he'd been whipped or attacked by a savage beast, but other than that he was perfect. The scars, in some ways, only emphasised this perfection. 'You are like one of the statues,' Moon said, 'the ones in the Reliquary.'

'Get undressed,' Raven said.

Moon had no preconceptions whatsoever, and did not feel shy about what must happen. He was nervous, because it might hurt, but other than that was quite content to do as he was asked. He lay down on the damp gra.s.s, which was still cold because the sun had not touched it. Overhead, the tree branches swayed and rustled and birds hopped from limb to limb. Moon could see clouds racing across the sky.

Raven lay down beside him and the warmth of skin against skin was pleasant. Raven stroked his back in a way Moon thought somehar had done to him before, presumably his hostling, many years ago. Sometimes, Raven's breath drifted across Moon's face and when it did so, he received impressions of vague fleeting pictures, as if they'd been painted in faint watercolours. Moon had a strong impulse to put his mouth against Raven's own and really taste those images, but Raven carefully avoided such contact. Moon guessed he didn't want to share what was inside him. The stroking and tantalising breath kindled desire in Moon's body. He had never felt such a thing before and was startled by its power and the control it had over him. What was the purpose of it? Raven's caresses became more invasive and Moon saw a picture in his mind of a great door. He knew that behind it was some kind of treasury and that the treasure would not be what he expected. He gasped and arched his body a little and Raven slid on top of him. He put one hand on Moon's face and murmured, 'Relax.'

'I can't.' Moon kept his legs clamped close together, knowing he shouldn't, but feeling that once he allowed Raven to do what had to be done, it would change everything forever. He wasn't ready for that change. He hadn't thought about it. This was all too quick. He couldn't stop the tears. Should it be like this?

Raven put his mouth against Moon's lips and gently exhaled. He gave to Moon images of Silken, images of Moon himself as a harling, laughing and playing in sunlight: the two of them together. He gave to Moon images that he must have come from Snake, long ago, of dusty red lands and soaring mountains. Moon saw his father as he'd once been: whole and vigorous. These images were not painful, nor did they make Moon sad. He felt a wistful longing for things he'd never had, but it was a sweet longing. He understood, for a brief moment, what living truly was, and how magical it was that hara could come together this way, mingling their beings, sharing all that is deep and pa.s.sionate. He was sinking into an ocean of soft feathers, the most comfortable place in the world, where pain and sorrow could not exist. This was like entering the otherworld, walking the spirit paths in a place far better than cold reality. He curled his legs around Raven's lean back and Raven pushed inside him.

'This is so strange,' Moon said.

'Hush.'

'But it is. It's so weird that a piece of you is inside me. It's such a strange thing to do. Whoever thought of it?'

'Stop thinking,' Raven said.

But Moon couldn't stop. His body responded fully to physical sensation, but the more it did so, the more his mind raced. He was chattering to himself like a maniac, full of questions. What had made Snake cut himself off from other hara? What had happened to Raven to make him so dour? Where had they come from? Where was the red dusty land? Who had they left behind? He saw a s.h.i.+ning web stretching across infinity, and it was studded with points of light. He knew that each of these points represented others who were connected to him and surely now, at this moment, they must be aware of him too. Who were these hara? Where were they?

Raven's movements had become more urgent and deep, his breathing fast and ragged. It was like a storm hurtling across the Sea of Ghosts in a boil of dark cloud to break over the sh.o.r.e. The ground was shaking. The trees were shaking.

Moon opened his eyes, which had been shut tight and saw the branches overhead vibrating wildly. Leaves and twigs were raining down and the hens were screeching in terror. This wasn't aruna: this was real. Moon cried out and tried to pull away from Raven, but the climax of aruna crashed over them and s.n.a.t.c.hed Moon's senses in its flow. Wave after wave of indescribably delicious sensation coursed through his body while around them the world shattered. They would be buried in the debris. They would be killed, and they were so helpless, imprisoned by animal instinct that didn't care if everything around them was exploding. Moon screamed in ecstasy and terror. Clear thoughts came to him in the eye of the storm: aruna is selfish, it doesn't give a d.a.m.n what happens to us. It has a mind of its own.

A deafening crash came from the direction of the Reliquary, and everything went black. In the darkness, pinned beneath Raven's heavy, panting body, Moon waited for the sky to fall in. Everything had ended. The dark had come.

Moon opened his eyes, fully expecting to find himself in some kind of spirit realm, but was surprised and relieved to find that he was still lying on the ground in the orchard, which was indeed covered in debris as if a terrible storm had hit it. Raven was nearby, pulling on his clothes.

'What was that?' Moon asked.

'I don't know,' Raven said. 'Earthquake, maybe.'

'Did we do that?'

Raven smiled, something he did so rarely, but which made him look truly beautiful. 'No, we didn't,' he said dryly, but not without humour. 'Don't worry. It's not bad.'

'How do you know?'

Raven tied up his braids again, which had come loose during aruna. 'I should check on Snake.'

It was at this point that Moon realised his whole body was throbbing and aching in a not altogether unpleasant manner. He didn't want to move and yet he did. 'I'll come with you,' he said and sat up. The world swayed, and for some moments he had to sit with his head between his knees.

'You should really stay here,' Raven said. 'You should rest.'

'I want to see if he's OK.'

Raven didn't say anything else, but simply headed in the direction of the Reliquary. Moon quickly pulled on his clothes and scrambled after him. He didn't feel remotely in control of his limbs, but at least they seemed willing to propel him in the right direction.

The door to Snake's room was stuck, because something heavy on the other side was wedged against it. Both Raven and Moon leaned upon it, pus.h.i.+ng with all their strength. Moon nearly pa.s.sed out with the effort. By the time they'd managed to force the door open a few inches, his vision was totally occluded by darting spots of light.

Raven squeezed through the gap and ran into the room. Moon had to follow more slowly. He felt utterly nauseous now, not least because hot fluid had fallen out of him in an unexpected gush and had soaked his trousers. The room was a mess. An ornamental pillar had fallen, which was what had wedged the door shut. A lot of the ceiling ornaments had come down and covered the floor and furniture. Snake was lying face down in the middle of the room, his arms and legs spread out. He was wearing a long robe, but his feet were bare: the sight of his upturned soles was heartbreaking, because they looked so vulnerable. One of the feet was twisted and withered, and Moon so rarely saw that. Snake always kept himself covered. It brought new tears to Moon's eyes.

Raven was squatting down beside Snake and now turned over his body.

Moon stood over them, both hands pressed against his mouth, sure that his father was dead. But Snake groaned and his eyelids flickered. Raven stroked dust and flakes of plaster from Snake's face. 'Look at me,' he said.

Snake drew in a long breath and struggled to sit up, his arms flailing upon the air. Moon went to a.s.sist Raven lift his father. 'Are you all right, Snake?' Moon asked, at least three times.

Snake did not seem to be aware Moon was there. He got to his feet and shrugged off his helpers. Slowly, he limped across the room and went to a cupboard where he kept some rough wine they'd bartered for some months before. This, he swigged from the flagon, then wiped his mouth with the back of his good hand. He came back to his companions and handed the flagon to Raven, who gave it directly to Moon, saying, 'You need this more.'

Moon took a drink, knowing that both he and Raven were waiting for Snake's p.r.o.nouncement, because it was clear he had one. His golden eye glowed with its own light in the gloom of the room, where swirls of dust eddied in a beam of suns.h.i.+ne that came in through a high skylight. 'It is not unconnected,' he said at last.

Moon and Raven said nothing.

Snake nodded to himself and limped to his chair, where he sat down heavily. He looked down at his withered foot, staring at it in surprise and contempt as if he'd never seen it before. Intuitively, Moon fetched his father's boots and knelt to put them on for him. He was surprised when Snake reached out and placed a hand on the top of his head. 'How are you, Moon?'

Moon looked up. 'Fine.'

'You shouldn't have come here. You should rest.' He stroked his son's hair and Moon saw in Snake's eyes an expression he'd never seen before: intimate and caring. 'It shouldn't have been like this,' Snake said. 'You should have had a feast and many friends around you. Silken should have been here to wind your hair with flowers.' He glanced briefly at Raven. 'We let you down. We made no preparations. We could have done, even just the three of us. I'm sorry, Moon.'

'It was fine,' Moon said. 'Really. I liked it.' He felt like crying again, but this time with happiness. Perhaps aruna had confounded his senses, and perhaps it had changed everything, as he'd suspected it might. Snake had never spoken to him like this before. Raven was a silent presence behind him, but even though Moon couldn't see him, he felt connected to him. This was some kind of miracle. 'Was there an earthquake?' he asked his father.