Six Plays by Lady Florence Henrietta Fisher Darwin Part 18

EMILY. [Very angrily.] When I want your opinion, Thomas, I'll ask for it. Suppose you was to go out and see after something which you do understand.

THOMAS. O I'll go down to the field fast enough, I can tell you.

'Twas only being hungered as drove me into the hornets' nest, as you might say.

EMILY. [Ironing fiercely.] What's that?

THOMAS. Nothing. I did only say as I was a-going back to the field when George do come home.

EMILY. There again. Did you ever know the man to be so slow before.

I warrant as he have gone drinking or mischiefing down at the Spotted Cow instead of coming straight home with they chicken.

THOMAS. Nay, nay. George is not the lad to do a thing like that. A quieter more well bred up lad nor George never trod in shoes.

EMILY [Glancing at MAGGIE.] What are you tossing your head like that for, Maggie? Please to recollect as you're a lazy, good-for-nothing little s.l.u.t of a maid servant, and not a circus pony all decked out for the show.

JESSIE. Maggie's fond of Georgie. And Georgie's kind to Mag.

MAGGIE. [Fearfully.] O don't, Miss Jessie, for goodness sake.

EMILY. [Viciously.] I'll soon put an end to anything in that quarter.

THOMAS. Now, Emily--take it quiet. Why, we shall have Clara upon us before us knows where we are.

EMILY. [Folding the curtains.] I'll settle her too, if she comes before I'm ready for her.

ROBIN. [Pointing through the open.] There's George, coming with the basket.

[GEORGE comes into the room. He carefully rubs his feet on the mat as he enters. Then he advances to the table. MAGGIE dries her eyes with the back of her hand. JESSIE is standing with her arm in MAGGIE'S.

EMILY. Well, and where have you been all this while, I'd like to know?

GEORGE. To Brook Farm, mam, and home.

EMILY. You've been up to some mischief on the way, I warrant.

THOMAS. Come, Emily.

[GEORGE looks calmly into EMILY'S face. Then his gaze travels leisurely round the room.

GEORGE. I was kept waiting while they did pluck and dress the chicken.

EMILY. [Lifting the cloth covering the basket, and looking within it.] I'd best have gone myself. Of all the thick-headed men I ever did see, you're the thickest. Upon my word you are.

GEORGE. What's wrong now, mistress?

EMILY. 'Taint chicken at all what you've been and fetched me.

GEORGE. I'll be blowed if I do know what 'tis then.

EMILY. If I'd been given a four arms and legs at birth same as th'

horses, I'd have left a pair of them at home and gone and done the job myself, I would. And then you should see what I'd have brought back.

GEORGE. You can't better what I've got here. From the weight it might be two fat capons. So it might.

EMILY. [Seizing the basket roughly.] Here, Mag, off into the pantry with them. A couple of skinny frogs from out the road ditch would have done as well. And you, Jess, upstairs with these clean curtains and lay them careful on the bed. I'll put them to the windows later.

THOMAS. George, my boy, did you meet with any one on the way, like?

EMILY. You'd best ask no questions if you don't want to be served with lies, Thomas.

GEORGE. [Throwing a glance of disdain at EMILY.] Miles Hooper and Farmer Jenner was taking the air 'long of one another in the wood, master.

THOMAS. Miles Hooper and Luke a-taking of the air, and of a weekday morning!

GEORGE. That they was, master. And they did stop I -

EMILY. Ah, now you've got it, Thomas. Now we shall know why George was upon the road the best part of the day and me kept waiting for the chicken.

GEORGE. [Steadily.] Sunday clothes to the back of both of them.

And, when was Miss Clara expected up at home.

THOMAS. Ah, 'tis a fair commotion all over these parts already, I warrant. There wasn't nothing else spoke of in market last time, but how as sister Clara with all her money was to come home.

JESSIE. [Coming back.] I've laid the curtains on the bed, shall I gather some flowers and set them on the table, mother?

EMILY. I'd like to see you! Flowers in the bedroom? I never heard tell of such senseless goings on. What next, I'd like to know?

GEORGE. Miss Clara always did fill a mug of clover blooms and set it aside of her bed when her was a little thing--so high.

JESSIE. Do you remember our fine aunt, then, Georgie?

GEORGE. I remembers Miss Clara right enough.

EMILY. Don't you flatter yourself, George, as such a c.o.xsy piece of town goods will trouble herself to remember you.

THOMAS. The little maid had a good enough heart to her afore she was took away from us.

JESSIE. Do you think our aunt Clara has growed into a c.o.xsy town lady, George?

GEORGE. No, I do not, Miss Jessie.

EMILY. [Beginning to stir about noisily as she sets the kitchen in order.] Get off with you to the field, Thomas, can't you. I've had enough to do as 'tis without a great hulking man standing about and taking up all the room.

THOMAS. Come, George, us'll clear out down to th' hay field, and s.n.a.t.c.h a bite as we do go.

GEORGE. That's it, master.

EMILY. [Calling angrily after them.] There's no dinner for no one to-day, I tell you.