Hobson's Choice: A Lancashire Comedy in Four Acts Part 15

MAGGIE. That's right. We'll call it your wedding gift to me, and I'll allow you're putting yourself out a bit for me.

(_Going with him to the door. He goes. She turns and comes to_ C.)

Well, Will, you've not had much to say for yourself to-day. Howst feeling, lad?

WILLIE. I'm going through with it, Maggie.

MAGGIE. Eh?

WILLIE. My mind's made up. I've got wrought up to point. I'm ready.

MAGGIE. It's church we're going to, not the dentist's.

WILLIE. I know. You get rid of summat at dentist's, but it's taking summat on to go to church with a wench, and the Lord knows what.

MAGGIE. Sithee, Will, I've a respect for church. Yon's not the place for lies. The parson's going to ask you will you have me and you'll either answer truthfully or not at all. If you're not willing, just say so now, and--

WILLIE. I'll tell him "yea".

MAGGIE. And truthfully?

WILLIE. Yes, Maggie. I'm resigned. You're growing on me, la.s.s. I'll toe the line with you.

(ALICE _and_ VICKEY _enter_ R. _in their Sunday clothes--the same at which_ HOBSON _grew indignant in Act I_. MAGGIE _takes_ WILLIE _across to_ L.)

ALICE. We're ready, Maggie.

MAGGIE. And time you were. It's not your weddings that you're dressing for. (_By trap_.) Come up, Tubby, and keep an eye on things.

VICKEY. (_to_ WILL). Will, have you got the ring?

MAGGIE. I have. Do you think I'd trust him to remember?

(MAGGIE _goes off with_ WILL. VICKEY _and_ ALICE _are following, laughing_. TUBBY _comes up trap and throws old shoes after them_.)

CURTAIN.

[Ill.u.s.tration] Reddish brick walls. Plaster falling off in places. Very old square carpet. Fire burning. No ornaments. Tin box on mantelpiece. A few plates, workbasket and tin boxes on dresser. Shoes, clogs on top of dresser. Old coloured tablecloth on table. Roll of leather, etc., at table behind screen. Three hat pegs on wall above fireplace. Lamp on mantelpiece.

ACT III

_The cellar in Oldfield Road is at once workroom, shop, and living-room.

It is entered from the_ R. _corner by a door at the top of a flight of some seven stairs. Its three windows are high up at the back--not shop windows, but simply to give light. Each window has on it "William Mossop, Practical Bootmaker," reversed as seen from the inside and is illuminated dimly from outside by a neighbouring street lamp.

A door_ L. _leads to the bedroom. Up stage_ L. _is a small screen or part.i.tion whose purpose is to conceal the sink. A shoemaker's bench, leather and tackle are against the wall_, R., _above the fire-place.

Below the door_, L., _is a small dresser. Table_ R. C. _Seating accommodation consists solely of the sofa and the two chairs taken from_ HOBSON'S, _now repaired. The sofa is_ L. _of the table, the two chairs_ R. _Crowded on the sofa are, in order, from down up,_ ALBERT, ALICE, VICKEY, FRED.

_As the curtain rises, the four are standing, tea-cups in hand, saying together "The Bride and Bridegroom." They drink and sit. General laughter and conversation. On the chair down stage is_ MAGGIE. _From the other chair_, C., _behind table_, WILL _rises, nervously, and rushes his little speech like a child who has learnt a lesson. The table has hot-house flowers (in a basin) and the remains of a meal at which tea only has been drunk, and the feast is represented by the sections of a large pork pie and a small wedding cake. As_ WILL _rises_, ALBERT _hammers on the table_.

ALICE _suppresses him_. WILLIE. It's a very great pleasure to us to see you here to-night. It's an honour you do us, and I a.s.sure you, speaking for my--my wife, as well as for myself, that the--the--

MAGGIE (_in an undertone_). Generous.

WILLIE. Oh, aye. That's it. That the generous warmth of the sentiments so cordially expressed by Mr. Beenstock and so enthusiastically seconded by--no, I've gotten that wrong road round--expressed by Mr. Prosser and seconded by Mr. Beenstock--will never be forgotten by either my life partner or self--and--and I'd like to drink this toast to you in my own house. Our guests, and may they all be married soon themselves.

MAGGIE (_rising and drinking with_ WILL). Our guests.

(WILL _and_ MAGGIE _sit. General laughter and conversation_.)

ALBERT (_solemnly rising_). In rising to respond--

ALICE (_tugging his coat and putting him into his seat_). Sit down.

We've had enough of speeches. I know men fancy themselves when they're talking, but you've had one turn and you needn't start again.

ALBERT. But we ought to thank him, Alice.

ALICE. I dare say. But you'll not speak as well as he did, so we can leave it with a good wind-up. I'm free to own you took me by surprise, Will.

FREDDY. Very neat speech indeed. (_Rising_.)

VICKEY. Who taught you, Will?

WILLIE. I've been learning a lot lately.

ALICE. I thought that speech never came natural from Will.

MAGGIE. I'm educating him.

FREDDY. Very apt pupil, I must say.

MAGGIE. He'll do. Another twenty years and I know which of you three men 'ull be thought most of at the Bank.

FREDDY. That's looking ahead a bit.

MAGGIE. I'll admit it needs imagination to see it now.

ALBERT (_rising and moving slightly_ C.). Well, the start's all right, you know. Snug little rooms. Shop of your own. And so on. I was wondering where you raised the capital for this, Maggie.

MAGGIE. I? You mustn't call it my shop. It's his.

ALICE. Do you mean to tell me that Willie found the capital?

MAGGIE. He's the saving sort.

ALICE. He must be if you've done this out of what father used to pay him.