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Down and Out in the Magic Kingdom Part 26

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"It may be none of my business," he said, "but why the f.u.c.k not? Jesus, Julius, what're you afraid of?"

"You don't want to know," I said.

"I'll be the judge of that."

"Let's have a drink, first," I said.

Dan rolled his eyes back for a second, then said, "All right, two Coronas, coming up."



After the room-service bot had left, we cracked the beers and pulled chairs out onto the porch.

"You sure you want to know this?" I asked.

He tipped his bottle at me. "Sure as shootin'," he said.

"I don't want refresh because it would mean losing the last year," I said.

He nodded. "By which you mean 'my last year,'" he said. "Right?"

I nodded and drank.

"I thought it might be like that. Julius, you are many things, but hard to figure out you are not. I have something to say that might help you make the decision. If you want to hear it, that is."

What could he have to say? "Sure," I said. "Sure." In my mind, I was on a shuttle headed for orbit, away from all of this.

"I had you killed," he said. "Debra asked me to, and I set it up. You were right all along."

The shuttle exploded in silent, slow moving s.p.a.ce, and I spun away from it. I opened and shut my mouth.

It was Dan's turn to look away. "Debra proposed it. We were talking about the people I'd met when I was doing my missionary work, the stone crazies who I'd have to chase away after they'd rejoined the b.i.t.c.hun Society. One of them, a girl from Cheyenne Mountain, she followed me down here, kept leaving me messages. I told Debra, and that's when she got the idea.

"I'd get the girl to shoot you and disappear. Debra would give me Whuffie -- piles of it, and her team would follow suit. I'd be months closer to my goal. That was all I could think about back then, you remember."

"I remember." The smell of rejuve and desperation in our little cottage, and Dan plotting my death.

"We planned it, then Debra had herself refreshed from a backup -- no memory of the event, just the Whuffie for me."

"Yes," I said. That would work. Plan a murder, kill yourself, have yourself refreshed from a backup made before the plan. How many times had Debra done terrible things and erased their memories that way?

"Yes," he agreed. "We did it, I'm ashamed to say. I can prove it, too -- I have my backup, and I can get Jeanine to tell it, too." He drained his beer. "That's my plan. Tomorrow. I'll tell Lil and her folks, Kim and her people, the whole ad-hoc. A going-away present from a s.h.i.+tty friend."

My throat was dry and tight. I drank more beer. "You knew all along," I said. "You could have proved it at any time."

He nodded. "That's right."

"You let me. . ." I groped for the words. "You let me turn into. . ."

They wouldn't come.

"I did," he said.

All this time. Lil and he, standing on _my_ porch, telling me I needed help. Doctor Pete, telling me I needed refresh from backup, me saying no, no, no, not wanting to lose my last year with Dan.

"I've done some pretty s.h.i.+tty things in my day," he said. "This is the absolute worst. You helped me and I betrayed you. I'm sure glad I don't believe in G.o.d -- that'd make what I'm going to do even scarier."

Dan was going to kill himself in two days' time. My friend and my murderer. "Dan," I croaked. I couldn't make any sense of my mind. Dan, taking care of me, helping me, sticking up for me, carrying this horrible shame with him all along. Ready to die, wanting to go with a clean conscience.

"You're forgiven," I said. And it was true.

He stood.

"Where are you going" I asked.

"To find Jeanine, the one who pulled the trigger. I'll meet you at the Hall of Presidents at nine a.m.."

I went in through the Main Gate, not a castmember any longer, a Guest with barely enough Whuffie to sc.r.a.pe in, use the water fountains and stand in line. If I were lucky, a castmember might spare me a chocolate banana. Probably not, though.

I stood in the line for the Hall of Presidents. Other guests checked my Whuffie, then averted their eyes. Even the children. A year before, they'd have been striking up conversations, asking me about my job here at the Magic Kingdom.

I sat in my seat at the Hall of Presidents, watching the short film with the rest, sitting patiently while they rocked in their seats under the blast of the flash-bake. A castmember picked up the stageside mic and thanked everyone for coming; the doors swung open and the Hall was empty, except for me. The castmember narrowed her eyes at me, then recognizing me, turned her back and went to show in the next group.

No group came. Instead, Dan and the girl I'd seen on the replay entered.

"We've closed it down for the morning," he said.

I was staring at the girl, seeing her smirk as she pulled the trigger on me, seeing her now with a contrite, scared expression. She was terrified of me.

"You must be Jeanine," I said. I stood and shook her hand. "I'm Julius."

Her hand was cold, and she took it back and wiped it on her pants.

My castmember instincts took over. "Please, have a seat. Don't worry, it'll all be fine. Really. No hard feelings." I stopped short of offering to get her a gla.s.s of water.

_Put her at her ease_, said a snotty voice in my head. _She'll make a better witness. Or make her nervous, pathetic -- that'll work, too; make Debra look even worse_.

I told the voice to shut up and got her a cup of water.

By the time I came back, the whole gang was there. Debra, Lil, her folks, Tim. Debra's gang and Lil's gang, now one united team. Soon to be scattered.

Dan took the stage, used the stageside mic to broadcast his voice.

"Eleven months ago, I did an awful thing. I plotted with Debra to have Julius murdered. I used a friend who was a little confused at the time, used her to pull the trigger. It was Debra's idea that having Julius killed would cause enough confusion that she could take over the Hall of Presidents. It was."

There was a roar of conversation. I looked at Debra, saw that she was sitting calmly, as though Dan had just accused her of sneaking an extra helping of dessert. Lil's parents, to either side of her, were less sanguine. Tom's jaw was set and angry, Rita was speaking angrily to Debra. Hickory Jackson in the old Hall used to say, _I will hang the first man I can lay hands on from the first tree I can find_.

"Debra had herself refreshed from backup after we planned it," Dan went on, as though no one was talking. "I was supposed to do the same, but I didn't. I have a backup in my public directory -- anyone can examine it.

Right now, I'd like to bring Jeanine up, she's got a few words she'd like to say."

I helped Jeanine take the stage. She was still trembling, and the ad-hocs were an insensate babble of recriminations. Despite myself, I was enjoying it.

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