Original Penny Readings Part 16

There in the bottom, with fish that he had caught lying by him, in company with a spear and several fis.h.i.+ng-lines and roughly-made hooks, was the owner of the canoe--a fine-looking, dusky-hued, half-clad savage, lying as though asleep, but quite dead--evidently from want of water; for there were fish enough in the canoe to have sustained life for some days.

To judge from appearances, it seemed that the poor fellow had either been borne out by some powerful current, or blown off the sh.o.r.e by one of the gales which sweep down from the coast; and in imagination I could paint the despair of the poor wretch toiling with his paddle to regain the land which held all that was dear to him. Toiling in his frail skiff beneath the fervour of the tropic sun, and toiling in vain till faint with the heat and parched with thirst, with the bright and sparkling water leaping murmuringly round, till exhausted he fell back, with the dull film of despair gathering on his eyes, and sank into a dreamy stupor filled with visions of home, green trees waving, and the gurgling of a stream through a cocoa-grove. Then to wake once more with renewed energy--to paddle frantically for the dim coastline; but still to find that his unaided efforts were useless, and that every minute he was farther away from the wished-for goal. Only a savage--untutored, unlettered; but yet a man made in G.o.d's own image, and with the same pa.s.sions as ourselves. Only a savage--and yet in his calm, deep sleep, n.o.ble, and lordly of aspect; and there he lay, with all around him placed orderly and neatly, and it seemed that, after that wild struggle for life, when nature prompts, and every pulse beats anxiously to preserve that great gift of the Creator--it seemed that he had quietly, calmly, let us say, too, hopefully--for dark is the savage mind indeed that has not some rays of light and belief in a great overruling Spirit--hopefully lain him down in the bottom of the canoe and gone to sleep.

There was not a man there, from the captain to the roughest sailor, but spoke in an under-tone in the presence of the remains of that poor savage; for now they were by the sacred dead--far away upon the mighty ocean, solemn in its calm, with the sun sinking to his rest, and sending a path of glory across the otherwise trackless waters--the sky glowing with his farewell rays, and everywhere silence, not even the sigh of the gale or the gentle lapping of the water against the boat.

I started as the captain gave the order to give way; and then found that the canoe was made fast, and slowly towed back to the s.h.i.+p, where it was hoisted on board.

An hour afterwards we were all a.s.sembled on deck, and bareheaded. The unclouded moon was nearly at the full, and shone brightly upon the scene, for in the lat.i.tudes where we then were night follows quickly upon sunset. Sewn up in a piece of sailcloth, and resting upon a plank, was the body of the poor savage; while taking their cue from the captain, sailors and pa.s.sengers stood grouped around, silent and grave, as though the calm sleeping form had been that of a dear companion and friend.

Not another sound was heard, as in a deep, impressive voice the captain commenced reading the service for the burial of the dead. Solemn and touching at all times, but doubly so now, far out in the midst of the great wilderness of waters; and, besides, there was something mournful in the poor fellow's fate, which made its way to the hearts of even the rudest seaman present.

And still the captain read on till the appointed time, when one end of the plank was raised, and the form slowly glided from the s.h.i.+p, and plunged heavily beneath the wave; the waters circled and sparkled in the moonlight for a few moments, lapping against the s.h.i.+p's side, and then all was still again but the deep, solemn voice of the captain as he read on to the end, when the men silently dispersed and talked in whispers, while the canoe which lay upon the deck reminded us at every turn of the sad incident we had witnessed.

The next day down came a fair wind: sails were shaken out, the cordage tightened, the vessel heeled over, and once more we were cleaving our way through the dancing waters; but the recollection of the dead savage floating alone upon the great ocean clung to us all for the remainder of the voyage.

CHAPTER NINETEEN.

MARTHA JINKS'S EGSPERIENCES.

A short time since we were about to change our residence, and my wife, having need for a fresh lady to cook our chops and manufacture apple-dumplings, answered two or three of the advertis.e.m.e.nts which appeared in the "_Thunderer_," under the heading, "Want Places. All letters to be post-paid." When after the lapse of a couple of days, Mistress Martha Jinks called in Whole Jorum Street, and was shown into the room. Mrs Scribe thought it better that I should be present, to act as support in case of need, since she is rather nervous over such matters. Consequently, I sat busy scribbling at a side-table, ready if wanted--really and truly writing, and lamenting greatly the want of stenography, so that my report of Mrs Jinks's visit might have been _verbatim_. A tall, stout, elderly lady, in a snuff-hued front, with a perpetual smile upon her countenance, a warm colour, and a figure bearing a strong resemblance to one of those rolled mattresses in a furnis.h.i.+ng warehouse--one of those tied round the middle with a cord, and labelled "all wool." She was a lady who would undoubtedly have ruled the roast in her kitchen, and knowing my partner's foibles I should most decidedly have contrived that Mrs Jinks did not take possession of our new suburban residence. But my fears were needless, for after a few exchanges touching wages, privileges, number of servants, and numerous other little matters, interesting only to those whom they may concern, my wife mentioned our proximate removal, when Mrs Martha Jinks, with the evident intention of keeping the ball rolling, gave her head a most vigorous shake, smiled patronisingly, and then, after bridling up, unto her did say--

"No, mum, not if I knows it; thank you all the same. I likes the sound of the place, mum, and I ain't a-finding fault with the wages, nor the tea and sugar, nor the perquisites, but I'll never bemean myself, mum, to going to a new house agen. I've been cook in the respectablest of families, mum, for three-and-thirty years, and after my egsperience in new houses, I'll never go to one no more.

"Now, of course I ain't a-saying but what old houses has their doorbacks, sech as crickets, as is allus a-going fuzz, and flying by night into the candle and into the sugar-basin; and then, agen, black beatles, as isn't pleasant to walk over if you come down in the dark, and then a-going pop to that degree that the mess on the floor nex morning is enough to worry a tylin' and mylin' woman out of her seven senses.

"You see, mum, I don't dislike the looks of you; for you don't look mean, and as if you'd allus be a-pottering about in my kidgin, which is a thing I can't abear; for, as I says to Mary in my last place--Mary, you know, as married the green-grocer, and sells coals at the little shop a-corner of the mews,--'Mary,' I says, 'a missus oughter be in her drorring-room--a-drorring, or a-receiving of wisitors, or a-making of herself agreeable at the winder, not a-poking and a-poll-prying about my kidgin, with her nose in the dresser-drors, a-smelling and a-peeping about. What is it to her, I should like to know, if there is a bottle in the corner of the cupboard next door to the cruets, and if it don't smell of winegar but of g--, you know? Why, if a missus was troubled with spazzums to the degree as I've suffered 'em, she'd go and live in a distillery and never be happy out.' The things as I've put up with in some places, mum, would give you the creeps, and make yer 'air stand on end. Me, you know, a cook as has lived in the best of families, to be told as the brandy-sauce had not got half the brandy in; and when the tipsy-cake come on the table, for the missus to come downstairs in a towering fury, and go on like Billinsgate. I'm sure she did for all her pretence about being a lady; and to say as she did with them brazen lips of her's, and all the time trembling with pa.s.sion--

"'Cook,' she says, 'Cook, it ain't the cake as is tipsy-cake, it's summit else;' and me a-sitting in that blessed chair, aside of the fire, feeling as if all the use was took outer my legs, when I only just put my lips to the sherry, just to see if it was good enough for the sponge-cake, as I took so much pains to make, tho' it did get burnt at the bakehouse to that degree that I was obleeged to cut quite a lunch off all round. But I wouldn't bemean myself to speak; for 'Martha,' I says to myself, 'Martha Jinks,' I says, 'if you are a cook, you are a sooperior woman, and with your egsperiens, you needn't take sauce from any one.' So I sat looking at her that disdainful that it quite brought on a sort of sterrical hiccups, and then, I couldn't help it, she went on so cruelly, I melted into tears, and there they was a-dripping-- dripping--dripping all over the kidgin, and the missus a-going on still at that rate that I couldn't abear it, and fainted away so that they had to carry me upstairs to bed, and b.u.mped my pore head agen the ballisters, so that it ached fearful next morning, and I was obliged to have the least sup of g--, you know, in a wine-gla.s.s, took medicinally, you know, for if there is any mortial thing in this life as _is_ disgusting it's a woman as takes to sperrits.

"But, there, I wouldn't stay. I couldn't, bless you; for, as I says to Mary, 'Mary,' I says, 'you may lead me with a bit o' darning-cotton, but clothes-line wouldn't pull me.' Oh, no, I couldn't have put up with it if missus had gone down on her bended knees in the sand on my beautiful white kidgin floor, and begged of me to stay. Oh, no--I give warning there and then. 'A month's wages or a month's warning,' I says, and she give me the month's wages, and said I was to get out of the cruel house.

"And then I went to live with some common people, who had just built themselves a new house out by the Crischial Pallus, and there I stopped three months, till I was a'most worn to skin and bone, with the worry, and bother, and want of rest.

"First night I goes there, and takes my trunk, and a bundle, and a bonnet-box, and a basket, I might have known as all would go wrong, for the cabman sauced me to that degree it was orful; but I got rid of him at last, with my boxes a-standing outside the willa gate, out in the rain; and then no lights in the house, and no gash laid on, and no one to help me in with my things, and me a-going mosh--posh, pudge--mudge up the the soft gravel, and losing my gloshes a-sticking in the wet muddy stuff, and the wind a-blowing to that degree as my umbrelly--a bran new alpakky--was bust right down one of its ribs, and caught in the iron railings; while all the while I knowed as the rain was a-getting in to my best bonnet, and a man a-tumbling over my big box, as stood out in the roadway-path, and me without strength in my lines to pull it in the gate.

"'Never mind your s.h.i.+ns, my good man,' I says, 'help me in with my things, and I'll find you a bit of cold meat,' and then I recklets myself as there might be no cold meat in the house, and I turns it into a pint of beer, being a stranger to the place.

"'And what's your name, young woman,' I says to a fine doll of a housemaid, a-darning stockings in the noo kidgin, as smelt of paint to that degree that you might have been lodging in a ile-shop, while the man stood a-turning over his happince on the mat--I mean on his hands, and him on the door-mat, and not satisfied till I give him twopence more, which not having enough I give him a sixpence, to go and get it, and him never a-coming back, and keeping the whole sixpence and the two pence, too, as would have tried any woman's temper, if even she hadn't been a cook, which is the mildest and quietest beings as ever dished a jynt.

"'And what's your name, young woman?' I says to my fine madam, as she sat there and didn't seem to know the proper respect to years, though she did p.r.i.c.k her finger till the blood come, and serve her right, too, and if I did not expect from her looks as she'd be that vulgar to answer me disrespeckful and say, when I said 'What's your name?' 'Pudding and Tame,' like the gals did when I went to school, which wasn't yesterday, you know; but she didn't, but says, quite huffy, 'Jane,' she says.

"'Ho!' I says, werry distant, as I took off my bonnet and shawl, and laid 'em on the dresser. 'Ho!' I says, and then I sits me down afore the fire, and puts my feet on the fender; for as I had my gloshes on to come in I wouldn't wear my best boots, but left 'em in my box, and there, through there being a crack in the side, if the water hadn't soaked right through, and wetten'd my feet, so that they steamed again.

"At last, seeing as my fine lady meant to be uppish, I says to her, I says, in a tone o' wyce as showed I didn't mean to be trifled with, and if she meant to sit in my kidgin she must know who was missus. 'Jane,'

I says, 'you'd best put some more coals on the fire.'

"'You'd best not,' she says. 'It smokes.'

"I didn't say nothing to her then, but I says to myself, 'Martha,' I says, 'Martha Jinks, you've made a mistake; for if there is one mortial thing as I can't abear, it's smoke.'

"At last I says, 'Jane,' I says, 'I can't abear this smell of the paint any longer.'

"'Oh!' she says, 'this is nothing; the place is noo, and it's worse upstairs in our bedroom, which was done last.'

"'Worse?' I says. 'Young woman,' I says, in a whisper, 'it makes me feel faint. If you've the heart that can feel for another inside your stays,' I says, 'get me a wee drop of g--.'

"And she wouldn't!

"Oh, mum, the sufferins as I went through in that noo willa was dreadful. The kidgin fire smoked to that degree that the blacks used to be a-flying about all over the kidgin, and a-settling on everything, though if there's one place as a black will settle on it's your nose, when fust time you give it a rub there you are not fit to be seen; while the water was that hard it was no use to rub or wash. Soap was nowhere; and I declare to you, mum, sollumly, as I've often washed the s.m.u.ts off one side of my face on to the other, and took to black caps outer self-defence.

"If it hadn't ha' been for the least drop o' g--took inwardly now and then, I should ha' been a blackened corpse over and over again, for that fire nearly drove me mad. Cinders will come out into your pan sometimes, and frizzle and make a smell of hot fat all over the house, and it's no use for ladies to make a fuss about it, for where cooking's going on you must smell it sometimes if you wants to taste it, and you'd be hard-up without your cook. But when the wind sets right down the chimbley and blows all the smoke wrong way into your face, and making you sneeze, filling your eyes up, and driving the blacks into custard or veal cutlets, or whatever you're a-making of, who can help it? And then they says upstairs as the things tastes bitter.

"'You must have it stopped, mum,' I says to the missus, but she says as the place has cost 'em five hundred pound now more than the contrack, and so I says to myself, 'As it's for your good, and you won't be led, you must be drove.' So only outer self-defence I kep a black fire, and left the kidgin door open, when the blacks all went up the stairs, and a man came down nex week to take my measure for a patent prize kidginer.

"But then, mum, if you'll believe me, it wasn't only in the kidgin, it was all over the house, which was designed by the artchyteck to hold so much wind that it went wentilating about the place and banging the doors to that degree that if you didn't make haste you were hit on the back and nearly sent flat. Jane had such a stiff neck--not as that was anything new, for the baker said she was the stuckuppist gal he ever did see; but this was a cold stiff neck, and had to be rubbed with 'deldoc, and slep in flannel every night, so as she was a good half-hour undressing, and then got into bed with such cold feet as would have made a saint swear.

"'Jane,' says I, one night, 'if you don't sleep in your stockings I shall be obliged to have a bottle.'

"'Of g--,' she says, in her nasty, aggravating, spiteful way.

"'No imperance;' I says, 'a bottle of hot water, wrapped up in a flannel--a-hem--or I shall be having spazzums to that degree as I must have a drop of g--took inward, to save me from sufferin' as would make any one shudder.'

"Then the cold, and damp, and draughts give me the face-ache so that I had to have a tooth out, and he took the wrong one out, and said I told him that one, when it hadn't a speck in it, and the other was a regular sh.e.l.l; when what I suffered no one knows but Jane, with my face swelled upon one side like a bladder of lard squeezed, and Jane all the time going on because I would sit up in bed and rock myself to and fro, with a shawl over my shoulders, and the nasty stiff-necked thing grumbling and declaring it was like somebody playing with a pair of bellows in the bed, when it was only the nasty draughty house as she could feel, and me a-dying amost for a drop of g--took inwardly, on a bit of sugar.

"There was hardly a door that would shut, and when they did they stuck to that degree that you couldn't get 'em open again till you turned cross, when they'd fly open savagely and half knock you down, and I declare to goodness, for a whole month, mum, everything I put in my mouth tasted of paint.

"'Oh, you beauties!' I says, when after banging and ringing at the gate for near an hour, I was obliged to go down and let in the workmen as came battering in the middle of the night amost, for it had only just gone six. And there they were, smiths, and bricklayers, and plasterers, a-trampling all over my beautiful clean kitchen till they'd took out the range and scattered the bricks and mortar all over the floor, as trampled about all upstairs and got into the carpets. And the time those men wasted a-poking and pottering about till they'd got in the patent kidginet, when one stuck-up-nosed fellow begins to light it, and show me how it would draw.

"'You must keep the boiler full,' he says.

"'Young man,' I says, 'have I been in the best of families for thirty years, and do you think I don't know as a boiler without any water would bust?' And then I went out of the kidgin, and would not stop to be insulted by a jumped-up ironmonger's boy.

"And there the nex day, if the thing didn't smoke wuss than ever, not a bit going up the chimbley, but regularly blinding you, till master and missus come down, choking and sneezing, and--

"'Oh, cook,' says the missus, 'what have you been doing?'

"'No, mum,' I says, 'it's not me as has been a-doing anything; it's your patent kidginer and your noo house, as I'd never have set a foot in if I'd knowed--no, mum, not for double wages and everything found.'

"'Well, but cook,' says the master, 'it's the damper.'

"'Well, sir,' I says, 'I could have told you that; but it's my impression,' I says, 'that, when it's the dryer, it won't go a bit better, and the sooner you soot yourself the better.' And then, instead of taking the hint to go out of my kidgin, as he would have done if he'd had the sperret of a man, he actelly went patting and poking about the things, and opening this and shutting that, till I hadn't patience; when, because the thing left off smoking, he wanted to make out as I hadn't pulled out one of the little drawer things in the flue.

"But there never was sich a thing as that kidginer, and n.o.body never knowed how to take it; sometimes it would go a-running away and making itself red-hot, and burning all the blacklead off, and sometimes it wouldn't go at all, but stopped all black and sulky; when your bit of fowl, or whatever you were baking--roasting they called it, but if it ain't baking a thing as is shut up inside a oven, what is it?--p'raps you'll tell me--and, there now, it would be raw as raw, or else dry, burnt up to a cinder, while of a night there was no fire to sit by and make yourself comfortable--nothing at all but a nasty black patent thing as never looked sociable, and sent all the smell of the cooking upstairs, specially cabbage.

"No, mum, I'm much obliged, mum; and if you had been going to stop here, mum, I should have been happy to give you a trial, when you'd no doubt have found out my wally, for you look a sweet-tempered creetur; but go to a noo house, mum, I won't--not under no consideration; and so I wish you good day, mum."