Lyre and Lancet Part 5

_His Fellow Pa.s.senger._ Well, I wouldn't judge beforehand. The chances are there'll be _somebody_ you can take to.

_Undersh.e.l.l_ (_to himself_). What sympathy! What bright, cheerful common sense! (_Aloud._) Do you know, you encourage me more than you can possibly imagine!

_His Fellow Pa.s.senger_ (_retreating_). Oh, if you are going to take my remarks like _that_, I shall be afraid to go on talking to you!

_Undersh.e.l.l_ (_with pathos_). Don't--_don't_ be afraid to talk to me!

If you only knew the comfort you give! I have found life very sad, very solitary. And true sympathy is so rare, so refres.h.i.+ng. I--I fear such an appeal from a stranger may seem a little startling; it is true that hitherto we have only exchanged a very few sentences; and yet already I feel that we have something--much--in common. You can't be so cruel as to let all intimacy cease here--it is quite tantalising enough that it must end so soon. A very few more minutes, and this brief episode will be only a memory; I shall have left the little green oasis far behind me, and be facing the dreary desert once more--alone!

_His Fellow Pa.s.senger_ (_laughing_). Well, of all the uncomplimentary things! As it happens, though, "the little green oasis"--as you're kind enough to call me--_won't_ be left behind; not if it's aware of it! I think I heard your friend mention Wyvern Court! Well, that's where _I'm_ going.

_Undersh.e.l.l_ (_excitedly_). You--_you_ are going to Wyvern Court! Why, then, you must be----

[_He checks himself._

_His Fellow Pa.s.senger._ What were you going to say; _what_ must I be?

_Undersh.e.l.l_ (_to himself_). There is no doubt about it; bright, independent girl; gloves a trifle worn; travels second-cla.s.s for economy; it must be Miss Mull herself; her letter mentioned Lady Culverin as her aunt. A poor relation, probably. She doesn't suspect that I am---- I won't reveal myself just yet; better let it dawn upon her gradually. (_Aloud._) Why, I was only about to say, why then you must be going to the same house as I am. How extremely fortunate a coincidence!

_His Fellow Pa.s.senger._ That remains to be seen. (_To herself._) What a funny little man; such a flowery way of talking for a footman. Oh, but I forgot; he said he _wasn't_ going to wear livery. Well, he _would_ look a sight in it!

PART V

CROSS PURPOSES

_In a First-cla.s.s Compartment._

_Lady Maisie_ (_to herself_). Poets don't seem to have much self-possession. He seems perfectly overcome by hearing my name like that. If only he doesn't lose his head completely and say something about my wretched letter!

_Spurrell_ (_to himself_). I'd better tell 'em before they find out for themselves. (_Aloud; desperately._) My lady, I--I feel I ought to explain at once how I come to be going down to Wyvern like this.

[Lady MAISIE _only just suppresses a terrified protest_.

_Lady Cantire_ (_benignly amused_). My good sir, there's not the slightest necessity; I am perfectly aware of who you are, and everything about you!

_Spurrell_ (_incredulously_). But really I don't see _how_ your ladys.h.i.+p---- Why, I haven't said a _word_ that----

_Lady Cantire_ (_with a solemn waggishness_.) Celebrities who mean to preserve their _incognito_ shouldn't allow their friends to see them off. I happened to hear a certain _Andromeda_ mentioned, and that was quite enough for Me!

_Spurrell_ (_to himself, relieved_). She knows; seen the sketch of me in the _Dog Fancier_, I expect; goes in for breeding bulls herself, very likely. Well, that's a load off my mind! (_Aloud._) You don't say so, my lady. I'd no idea your ladys.h.i.+p would have any taste that way; most agreeable surprise to me, I can a.s.sure you!

_Lady Cantire._ I see no reason for _surprise_ in the matter. I have always endeavoured to cultivate my taste in all directions; to keep in touch with every modern development. I make it a rule to read and see _everything_. Of course, I have no time to give more than a rapid glance at most things; but I hope some day to be able to have another look at your _Andromeda_. I hear the most glowing accounts from all the judges.

_Spurrell_ (_to himself_). She knows all the judges! She _must_ be in the fancy! (_Aloud._) Any time your ladys.h.i.+p likes to name I shall be proud and happy to bring her round for your inspection.

_Lady Cantire_ (_with condescension_). If you are kind enough to offer me a copy of _Andromeda_, I shall be _most_ pleased to possess one.

_Spurrell_ (_to himself_). Sharp old customer, this; trying to rush me for a pup. _I_ never offered her one! (_Aloud._) Well, as to _that_, my lady, I've promised so many already, that really I don't--but there--I'll see what I can _do_ for you. I'll make a note of it; you mustn't mind having to _wait_ a bit.

_Lady Cantire_ (_raising her eyebrows_). I will make an effort to support existence in the meantime.

_Lady Maisie_ (_to herself_). I couldn't have believed that the man who could write such lovely verses should be so--well, not _exactly_ a gentleman! How _petty_ of me to have such thoughts. Perhaps geniuses never _are_. And as if it _mattered_! And I'm sure he's very natural and simple, and I shall like him when I know him better.

[_The train slackens._

_Lady Cantire._ What station is this? Oh, it _is_ Shuntingbridge.

(_To_ SPURRELL, _as they get out_.) Now, if you'll kindly take charge of these bags, and go and see whether there's anything from Wyvern to meet us--you will find us here when you come back.

_On the Platform at Shuntingbridge._

_Lady Cantire._ Ah, _there_ you are, Phillipson! Yes, you can take the jewel-case; and now you had better go and see after the trunks.

(PHILLIPSON _hurries back to the luggage-van_; SPURRELL _returns_.) Well, Mr.--I always forget names, so I shall call you "Andromeda"--have you found out---- The omnibus, is it? Very well, take us to it, and we'll get in.

[_They go outside._

_Undersh.e.l.l_ (_at another part of the platform--to himself_). Where has Miss Mull disappeared to? Oh, there she is, pointing out her luggage. What a quant.i.ty she travels with! Can't be such a _very_ poor relation. How graceful and collected she is, and how she orders the porters about! I really believe I shall enjoy this visit. (_To a porter._) That's mine--the brown one with a white star. I want it to go to Wyvern Court--Sir Rupert Culverin's.

_Porter_ (_shouldering it_). Right, sir. Follow me, if you please.

[_He disappears with it._

_Undersh.e.l.l_ (_to himself_). I mustn't leave Miss Mull alone.

(_Advancing to her._) Can I be of any a.s.sistance?

_Phillipson._ It's all done now. But you might try and find out how we're to get to the Court.

[UNDERSh.e.l.l _departs; is requested to produce his ticket, and spends several minutes in searching every pocket but the right one_.

[Ill.u.s.tration: SEARCHING EVERY POCKET BUT THE RIGHT ONE.]

_In the Station Yard at Shuntingbridge._

_Lady Cantire_ (_from the interior of the Wyvern omnibus, testily, to_ Footman). What are we waiting for _now_? Is my maid coming with us--or how?

_Footman._ There's a fly ordered to take her, my lady.

_Lady Cantire_ (_to_ SPURRELL, _who is standing below_). Then it's _you_ who are keeping us!

_Spurrell._ If your ladys.h.i.+p will excuse me. I'll just go and see if they've put out my bag.

_Lady Cantire_ (_impatiently_). Never mind about your bag. (_To_ Footman.) What have you done with this gentleman's luggage?

_Footman._ Everything for the Court is on top now, my lady.