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Where There is Nothing Part 2

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_Charlie Ward._ In earnest! Then when I go back I'll commit Paddy c.o.c.kfight to prison for hitting me yesterday.

_Paul Ruttledge._ You don't believe me, but I will explain. I'm dead sick of this life; I want to get away; I want to escape--as you say, to pick up my living like the crows for a while.

_Charlie Ward._ To make your escape. Oh! that's different. [_Coming closer._] But what is it you did? You don't look like one that would be in trouble. But sometimes a gentleman gets a bit wild when he has a drop taken.

_Paul Ruttledge._ Well, never mind. I will explain better while we are changing. Come over here to the potting shed. Make haste, those magistrates will be coming out.

_Charlie Ward._ The magistrates! Are they after you? Hurry on, then!



Faith, they won't know you with this coat. [_Looking at his rags._] It's a pity I didn't put on my old one coming out this morning.

[_They go out through the garden._ THOMAS RUTTLEDGE _comes down steps from house with_ COLONEL LAWLEY _and_ MR. GREEN.

_Mr. Green._ Yes, they have made me President of the County Horticultural Society. My speech was quite a success; it was punctuated with applause. I said I looked upon the appointment not as a tribute to my own merits, but to their public spirit and to the Society, which I a.s.sured them had come to stay.

_Colonel Lawley._ What has become of Paul and Father Jerome? I thought I heard their voices out here, and now they are conspicuous by their absence.

_Thomas Ruttledge._ He seems to have no friend he cares for but that Father Jerome.

_Mr. Green._ I wish he would come more into touch with his fellows.

_Colonel Lawley._ What a pity he didn't go into the army. I wish he would join the militia. Every man should try to find some useful sphere of employment.

_Mr. Green._ Thomas, your brother will never come to see me, though I often ask him. He would find the best people--people worth meeting--at my house. I wonder if he would join the Horticultural Society? I know I voice the sentiments of all the members in saying this. I spoke to a number of them at the function the other day.

_Thomas Ruttledge._ I wish he would join something. Joyce wants him to join the Masonic Lodge. It is not a right life for him to keep hanging about the place and doing nothing.

_Mr. Green._ He won't even come and sit on the Bench. It's not fair to leave so much of the work to me. I ought to get all the support possible from local men.

[MRS. RUTTLEDGE _comes down steps with_ MR. DOWLER, MR. ALGIE, _and_ MR. JOYCE. _She is walking in front._

_Mrs. Ruttledge._ [_To_ THOMAS RUTTLEDGE.] Oh! Thomas, isn't it too bad, Paul has lent the donkey to that friar. I wanted Mr. Joyce to see the children in their panniers. Do speak to him about it.

_Thomas Ruttledge._ Well, the donkey belongs to him, and for the matter of that so does the house and the place. It would be rather hard on him not to be able to use things as he likes.

_Mr. Algie._ What a pleasure it must be to Paul to have you and the little ones living here. He certainly owes you a debt of grat.i.tude. Man was not born to live alone.

_Mrs. Ruttledge._ Well, I think we have done him good. He hasn't done anything for years, except mope about the house and cut the bushes into those absurd shapes, and now we are trying to make him live more like other people.

_Colonel Lawley._ He was always inclined to be a bit of a faddist.

_Mrs. Ruttledge._ [_To_ MR. ALGIE.] Do let me give you a lesson in croquet. I have learned all the new rules. [_To_ MR. JOYCE.] Please bring me that basket of b.a.l.l.s. [_To COLONEL LAWLEY._] Will you bring me the mallets? Yes, I am afraid he is a faddist. We have done our best for him, but he ought to be more with men.

_Mr. Algie._ Yes, Mr. Dowler was just saying he ought to try and be made a director of the new railway.

_Colonel Lawley._ The militia--the militia.

_Mr. Joyce._ It's a great help to a man to belong to a Masonic Lodge.

_Mr. Green._ The Horticultural Society is in want of new members.

_Mrs. Ruttledge._ Well, I wish he would join something.

_Enter_ PAUL RUTTLEDGE _in tinker's clothes, carrying a rabbit in his hand._ CHARLIE WARD _follows in_ PAUL'S _clothes. All stand aghast._

_Mr. Joyce._ Good G.o.d!

[_Drops basket._ COLONEL LAWLEY, _who has mallets in his hand, at sight of_ PAUL RUTTLEDGE _drops them, and stands still._

_Mrs. Ruttledge._ Paul! are you out of your mind?

_Thomas Ruttledge._ For goodness' sake, Paul, don't make such a fool of yourself.

_Mrs. Ruttledge._ What on earth has happened, and who on earth is that man?

_Paul Ruttledge._ [_Opens gate for tinker. To_ CHARLIE WARD.] Wait for me, my friend, down there by the cross-road. [CHARLIE WARD _goes out._

_Mr. Green._ Has he stolen your clothes?

_Paul Ruttledge._ Oh! it's all right; I have changed clothes with him. I am going to join the tinkers.

_All._ To join the tinkers!

_Paul Ruttledge._ Life is getting too monotonous; I would give it a little variety. [_To_ MR. GREEN.] As you would say, it has been running in grooves.

_Mr. Joyce._ [_To_ MRS. RUTTLEDGE.] This is only his humbugging talk; he never believes what he says.

[PAUL RUTTLEDGE _goes towards the steps._

_Mrs. Ruttledge._ Surely you are not going into the house with those clothes?

_Paul Ruttledge._ You are quite right. Thomas will go in for me. [_To_ THOMAS RUTTLEDGE.] Just go to my study, will you, and bring me my despatch-box; I want something from it before I go.

_Thomas Ruttledge._ Where are you going to? I wish you would tell me what you are at.

_Paul Ruttledge._ The despatch-box is on the top of the bureau.

[_THOMAS RUTTLEDGE goes out._

_Mr. Joyce._ What does all this mean?

_Paul Ruttledge._ I will explain. [_Sits down on the edge of iron table._] Did you never wish to be a witch, and to ride through the air on a white horse?

_Mr. Joyce._ I can't say I ever did.

_Paul Ruttledge._ Never? Only think of it--to ride in the darkness under the stars, to make one's horse leap from cloud to cloud, to watch the sea glittering under one's feet and the mountain tops going by.

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