Light and Peace Part 9

*"You should not only be devout and love devotion, but you ought to make your piety useful, agreeable and charming to everybody. The sick will like your spirituality if they are lovingly consoled by it; your family, if they find that it makes you more thoughtful of their welfare, gentler in every day affairs, more amiable in reproving, and so on; your husband, if he sees that in proportion as your devotion increases you become more cordial and tender in your affection for him; your relations and friends, if they find you more forbearing, and more ready to comply with their wishes, should these not be contrary to G.o.d's will. Briefly, you must try as far as possible to make your devotion attractive to others; that is true zeal."-Saint Francis de Sales.*

11. Never allow your zeal to make you over eager to correct others, says the same Saint; and when you must do it remember that the most important thing to consider is the choice of the moment. A caution deferred can be given another time: one given inopportunely is not only fruitless, but moreover paralyses beforehand all the good that might have subsequently been done.

12. Be zealous, therefore, ardently zealous for the salvation of your neighbor, and to further it make use of whatever means G.o.d has placed in your power; but do not exceed these limits nor disquiet yourself about the good you are unable to do, for G.o.d can accomplish it through others.

In conclusion, zeal, according to the teachings of the Fathers of the Church, should always have truth for its foundation, indulgence for its companion, mildness for its guide, prudence for its counsellor and director.

*"I must look upon whatever presents itself each day to be done, in the order of Divine Providence, as the work G.o.d wishes me to do, and apply myself to it in a manner worthy of Him, that is with exactness and tranquillity. I shall neglect nothing, be anxious about nothing; as it is dangerous either to do G.o.d's work negligently or to appropriate it to one's self through self-love and false zeal. When our actions are prompted by our own inclinations, we do them badly, and are pretentious, restless, and anxious to succeed. The glory of G.o.d is the pretext that hides the illusion. Self-love disguised as zeal grieves and frets if it cannot succeed. O my G.o.d! give me the grace to be faithful in action, indifferent to success. My part is to will what Thou willest and to keep myself recollected in Thee amidst all my occupations: Thine it is to give to my feeble efforts such fruit as shall please Thee,-none if Thou so wishest."-Fenelon.*

XX.

MEEKNESS.

Blessed are the meek for they shall possess the land. (S. Matth., c.

V., v. 4.)

Learn of me because I am meek. (St. Matthew, c. XI., v. 29.)

1. Our Lord offers us in His Divine Person a model of all the virtues.

Meekness, however, is the one that He seems to have wished more particularly to propose for our imitation since He said: "Learn of Me for I am meek and humble of heart."

2. Try, therefore, to acquire and always preserve in your soul this christian virtue and to make all your exterior actions correspond with it. I do not say that you should never have the slightest feeling of irritation, as that would be to expect an impossibility; but you should be attentive to repress these movements and never yield to them voluntarily. It is natural for man to be often a.s.sailed by anger, says Saint Jerome, but it is peculiar to the Christian not to allow himself to be overcome by it.

3. A Christian, says Saint Bernard, who has no one at hand who gives him occasion to suffer, should seek such a person eagerly and buy him at any price, that he may have opportunity to practice meekness and patience. If you are not disposed to go to this expense, at least profit of whatever opportunities divine Providence has given you gratuitously, that you may accustom yourself to the exercise of these two inestimable virtues.

4. An excellent rule to follow is to make a compact with your tongue such as Saint Francis de Sales did with his, namely, that the tongue remain silent whenever the feelings are irritated. Otherwise you will begin to speak with the sincere resolution to keep within the bounds of moderation and prudence, but you will never succeed in so doing, because the bridle once loosened you will invariably be carried farther than you wished.

Reprimand from an angry man can do no good. Reproof is a moral remedy: how would it be possible for you to select and administer this remedy with discernment and prudence, when you yourself are ill and stand in need of both medicine and physician? Wait therefore until your soul is at peace, and when you have been restored to calmness you can speak advantageously. Even when it is your positive duty to administer a rebuke, defer it if possible until free from excitement, remembering that to have a salutary effect both he who gives it and he who receives it must be calm. Without this precaution the remedy will only aggravate the disease.

5. When obliged to reprove the fault of another, never fail to pray that G.o.d will speak to the person's heart whilst your words are sounding in his ears.

6. Observe, however, with Saint Gregory the Great and Saint Thomas, that if those it is your duty to correct abuse your mildness and considerateness, you are then justified in repressing their boldness with vigor and firmness. "Speak to the fool," says the Holy Spirit, "the language that his folly renders necessary, that he may not continue wise in his own eyes."[26] I repeat it: reproof is a remedy, and a remedy must be chosen and proportioned according to the nature and gravity of the evil.

XXI.

CONVERSATION.

Neither do men light a candle and put it under a bushel, but upon a candlestick, that it may give light to all who are in a house.

Let your light so s.h.i.+ne before men that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father who is in heaven. (St. Matthew, c. V., vv.

15-16.)

Contend not in words, for it is to no profit, but to the subversion of the hearers. (St. Paul, II Tim., c. II., v. 14.)

1. Conversation should be marked by a gentle and devout pleasantness, and your manner when engaged in it, ought to be equable, composed and gracious. Mildness and cheerfulness make devotion and those who practice it attractive to others. The holy abbot Saint Anthony, notwithstanding the extraordinary austerities of his penitential life, always showed such a smiling countenance that no one could look at him without pleasure.

2. We should be neither too talkative nor too silent,-it is as necessary to avoid one extreme as the other. By speaking too much we expose ourselves to a thousand dangers, so well known that they need not be mentioned in detail: by not speaking enough we are apt to be a restraint upon others, as it makes it seem as though we did not relish their conversation, or wished to impress them with our superiority.

*"Take great care not to be too critical of conversations in which the rules of devotion are not very exactly observed. In all such matters it is necessary that charity should govern and enlighten us in order to make us accede to the wishes of our neighbor in whatever is not in any way contrary to the commandments of G.o.d."-Saint Francis de Sales.*

3. Do not conclude from this that it is necessary to count your words, as it were, so as to keep your conversation within the proper limits. This would be as puerile a scruple as counting one's steps when walking. A holy spirit of liberty should dominate our conversations and serve to instil into them a gentle and moderate gaiety.

4. If you hear some evil spoken of your neighbor do not immediately become alarmed, as the matter may be true and quite public without your having been aware of it. Should you be quite certain that there is calumny or slander in the report, either because the evil told was false or exaggerated or because it was not publicly known, then, according to the place, the circ.u.mstances and your relations towards those present, say with moderation what appears most fitting to justify or excuse your neighbor. Or you may try to turn the conversation into other channels, or simply be content to show your disapprobation by an expressive silence.

Remember, for the peace of your conscience, that one does not share in the sin of slander unless he give some mark of approbation or encouragement to the person who is guilty of it.

5. Do not imitate those who are scrupulous enough to imagine that charity obliges them to undertake the defence of every evil mentioned in their presence and to become the self-appointed advocates of whoever it may be that has deserved censure. That which is really wrong cannot be justified, and no one should attempt the fruitless task: and as to the guilty, those who may do harm either through the scandal of their example or the wickedness of their doctrines, it is right that they should be shunned and openly denounced. "To cry out wolf, wolf," says Saint Francis de Sales, "is kindness to the sheep."

6. The regard we owe our neighbor does not bind us to a politeness that might be construed as an approval or encouragement of his vicious habits.

Hence if it happen that you hear an equivocal jest, a witticism slurring at religion or morals, or anything else that really offends against propriety, be careful not to give, through cowardice and in spite of your conscience, any mark of approbation, were it only by one of those half smiles that are often accorded unwillingly and afterwards regretted.

Flattery, even in the eyes of the world, is one of the most debasing of falsehoods. Not even in the presence of the greatest earthly dignitaries, will an honest, upright man sanction with his mouth that which he condemns in his heart. He who sacrifices to vice the rights of truth not only acts unlike a christian, but renders himself unworthy the name of man.

7. In small social gatherings try to make yourself agreeable to everybody present and to show to each some little mark of attention, if you can do so without affectation. This may be done either by directly addressing the person or by making a remark that you know will give him occasion to speak of his own accord,-draw him out, as the saying is. It was by the charm and urbanity of his conversation that Saint Francis de Sales prepared the way for the conversion of numbers of heretics and sinners, and by imitating him you will contribute towards making piety in the world more attractive. In regard to priests you should always testify your respect for the sacerdotal dignity quite independently of the individual.

8. Disputes, sarcasm, bitter language, and intolerance for dissenting opinions, are the scourges of conversation.

9. Although this adage comes to us from a pagan philosopher, we might profitably bear it always in mind: "In conversation we should show deference to our superiors, affability to our equals, and benevolence to our inferiors."

10. Generally speaking, it is wrong for those whom G.o.d does not call to abandon the world, to seclude themselves entirely and to shun all society suited to their position in life. G.o.d, who is the source of all virtue, is likewise the author of human society. Let the wicked hide themselves if they will, their absence is no loss to the world; but good people make themselves useful merely by being seen. It is well, moreover, the world should know that in order to practice the teachings of the Gospel it is not necessary to bury one's self in the desert; and that those who live for the Creator can likewise live with the creatures whom He has made according to His own image and likeness. Well, again, to show that a devout life is neither sad nor austere, but simple, sweet and easy; that far from being for those in the world an impediment to social relations, it facilitates, perfects and sanctifies such; that the disciples of Jesus Christ can, without becoming worldlings, live in the world; and that, in fine, the Gospel is the sovereign code of perfection for persons in society as well as for those who have renounced the world.

*Fenelon, who perhaps had even greater occasion than Saint Francis de Sales to teach men of the world how to lead a Christian life in society, wrote as follows to a person at court:

"You ought not to feel worried, it seems to me, in regard to those diversions in which you cannot avoid taking part. I know there are those who think it necessary that one should lament about everything, and restrain himself continually by trying to excite disgust for the amus.e.m.e.nts in which he must partic.i.p.ate. As for me, I acknowledge that I cannot reconcile myself to this severity. I prefer something more simple and I believe that G.o.d, too, likes it better. When amus.e.m.e.nts are innocent in themselves and we enter into them to conform to the customs of the state of life in which Providence has placed us, then I believe they are perfectly lawful. It is enough to keep within the bounds of moderation and to remember G.o.d's presence. A dry, reserved manner, conduct not thoroughly ingenuous and obliging, only serve to give a false idea of piety to men of the world who are already too much prejudiced against it, believing that a spiritual life cannot be otherwise than gloomy and morose."*

11. If all confessors agreed in instilling these maxims, which are as important as they are true, many persons who now keep themselves in absolute seclusion and live in a sad and dreary solitude would remain in society to the edification of their neighbor and the great advantage of religion. The world would thus be disabused of its unjust prejudices against a devout life and those who have embraced it.

12. Never remain idle except during the time you have allotted to rest or recreation. Idleness begets la.s.situde, disposes to evil speaking and gives occasion to the most dangerous temptations.

XXII.

DRESS.

Women also in decent apparel, adorning themselves with modesty and sobriety. (St. Paul, I. Tim., c. II., v. 9.)

1. Clothing is worn for a threefold object: to observe the laws of propriety, to protect our bodies from the inclemency of the weather, and, finally, to adorn them, as Saint Paul says, with _modesty and sobriety_.

This third end is, as you see, not less legitimate than the other two, provided you are careful to make it accord with them by confining it within proper limits and not permitting it to be the only one to which you attach any importance, so that neither health nor propriety be sacrificed to personal appearance.

2. External ornamentation should correspond with each one's condition in life. A just proportion in this matter, says Saint Thomas, is an offshoot of the virtues of uprightness and sincerity, for there is a sort of untruthfulness in appearing in garments that are calculated to give a wrong impression as to the position in which G.o.d has placed us in this world.

3. Be equally careful, then, to avoid over-nicety and carelessness in respect to matters of toilet. Excessive nicety sins against moderation and christian simplicity; negligence, against the order that should govern certain externals in human society. This order requires that each one's material life, and accordingly his attire which is a part of it, be suitable to his rank and condition; that Esther be clad as a queen, Judith as a woman of wealth and position, Agar as a bond-woman.

5. I shall not speak of immodest dress, for these instructions being intended for pious persons or for those who are endeavoring to become such, it would seem unnecessary. Nevertheless, as some false and pernicious ideas on this subject prevail in the world and lead into error souls desirous to do right, here are some fundamental principles that can serve you as a rule and save you from similar mistakes.