Frank Fairlegh Part 35

Besides the regular college tutor, I secured the a.s.sistance of what, in the slang of the day, we irreverently termed "a coach," which vehicle, for the conveyance of heavy learning (from himself to his pupils), consisted of a gentleman who, but few years older than those whom he taught, possessed more practical knowledge, and a greater apt.i.tude for the highest scientific research, than it had ever before been my fate to meet with combined in any one individual. Under his able tuition I advanced rapidly, and reading men began to look upon me as a somewhat formidable rival. Several of my opponents, however, were men of first-rate talent, whose powers of mind, as I could not for a moment disguise from myself, -230--were infinitely superior to my own, and with whom my only chance of competing successfully would be by the exercise of indefatigable perseverance and industry. Daylight, therefore (which at this season did not make its appearance over early), found me book in hand, and midnight saw me still seated at my desk--sometimes with a wet towel bound round my head, to cool the throbbing of my heated brow; at others, with a tea-pot of strong green tea by my side, to arouse and stimulate my wearied faculties: conventional specifics, of which, by the way, I very quickly discovered the fallacy.

A fear of completely knocking up, however, induced me to preserve some little method in my madness. I laid down a rule to walk for a couple of hours every day, and thus, although I grew pale and thin, no very dangerous effects appeared likely to ensue from my exertions.

One evening, about a week before the examinations were to begin, I was taking my usual const.i.tutional after Hall; and, careless which way I turned my steps, crossed the river at Moore's, and followed the footpath which led over the fields to the village of Chesterton. There had been a cattle fair at some place in the neighbourhood, which had drawn together a number of disreputable characters, and, in the course of my walk, I pa.s.sed two or three parties of rather suspicious-looking men. Having nothing valuable about me, however, I continued my walk. I had advanced some half mile or more, when I was roused from my meditations by a cry of "Thieves I thieves! help! hoy! thieves, I say!" accompanied by the noise of blows. When these sounds first reached me I was close to a hedge and stile, across which the footpath led, and from the farther side of which the cries proceeded. It was growing dark, but there still remained light enough to distinguish objects at a moderate distance. To bound over the stile and cast my eyes around was the work of a moment, nor was I much longer in taking part in an affray which was going on.

The person whose cries I had heard was a stout little man, respectably dressed, who was defending himself vigorously with what seemed in the twilight a club, but which turned out eventually to be an umbrella, against the attacks of a tall, strapping fellow, in a rough frieze coat, who was endeavouring to wrest his weapon from him. A still more formidable adversary was, however, approaching in the shape of a second ruffian, who had armed himself with a thick stake out of the hedge, and was creeping cautiously up behind the shorter man, with -231--the evident intention of knocking him on the head. I instantly determined to frustrate his benevolent design, nor was there much time to lose, if I wished my a.s.sistance to prove of much avail. Shouting, therefore, as well to intimidate the scoundrels as to let the person attacked know that there was succour at hand, I sprang upon the man who held the cudgel, and, seizing his uplifted arm, succeeded in averting the coming blow from the head of the intended victim, who, ignorant of the impending danger, was making most furious thrusts at his a.s.sailant with the point of his umbrella, a novel mode of attack, which seemed to perplex and annoy that individual in no small degree.

[Ill.u.s.tration: page231 Fairlegh to the Rescue]

I had, however, but little time allowed me to make observations, as the fellow with whom I had interfered, as soon as he perceived that he had only an unarmed man to deal with, appeared determined not to give up his hopes of plunder without a struggle, and, freeing his wrist by a powerful jerk, he aimed a blow at me with the bludgeon, which, had it taken effect, would at once have ended all my anxieties, and brought this veracious history to an abrupt and untimely conclusion.

Fortunately, however, for "my gentle public" and their humble servant, I was able, by dodging on one side, to avoid the stroke; and, seeing that matters had now become serious, I closed with him, and, after a short but severe struggle, had the satisfaction of depositing him flat on his back on the green sward. As he fell he dropped his stick, of which I immediately possessed myself, and, planting my foot upon his chest to prevent his rising, I turned to see how the other combatants were getting on. Dame Fortune had not, in this instance, acted up to her usual principle of favouring the brave, for the hero of the umbrella, having struggled gallantly for the preservation of his property and person, had apparently at length been overpowered, and, when I turned towards him, was lying on the ground, while his a.s.sailant was endeavouring to rifle his pockets, a matter which was rendered anything but easy of accomplishment by reason of the energetic kicks and struggles of the fallen warrior. It was clear that if I would not have the unfortunate little man robbed before my very eyes, I must go to his a.s.sistance. Giving, therefore, my prostrate foe a tap on the head with the stake, by way of a hint to lie still, I advanced to the rescue with uplifted weapon. No sooner did the rascal perceive my approach, than, quitting the fallen man, he sprang up, and, without waiting to be attacked, took to -232--his heels and ran off as fast as his legs would carry him, an example which his companion, seeing the coast clear, hastened to emulate.

My first act, as soon as the thieves had departed, was to a.s.sist the old gentleman to rise. As soon as he was on his legs again he shook himself, as if to ascertain that he was uninjured, and exclaimed:--

"Umph! they're gone, are they? the scoundrels, high time they should, I think; where's my umbrella? umph! second I've lost this year--just like me".

The voice, the manner, but, above all, the emphatic grunts and the final self-accusing soliloquy, "just like me," could proceed but from one person, my old Helmstone acquaintance, Mr. Frampton; though by what strange chance he should be found wandering by owl-light in a meadow near Cambridge pa.s.sed my comprehension to conceive. Feeling secure from the alteration which had taken place in me since I had last seen him--an alteration rendered still more complete by my academical costume--that he would be unable to recognise me, I determined to amuse myself a little at his expense before I made myself known to him. In pursuance of this plan I picked up his umbrella and handed it to him, saying in an a.s.sumed voice as I did so, "Here is your umbrella, sir".

"Thank ye, young man, thank ye, cost five-and-twenty s.h.i.+llings last Friday week; umph! might have got a cotton one for less than one quarter the money, that would have done just as well to thump thieves with--a fool and his money--just like me, umph!"

"I hope you are not injured by your fall, or by the rough treatment you have been subjected to?" inquired I.

"Umph! injured?" was the reply; "I've got a great b.u.mp on the back of my head, and burst all the b.u.t.tons off my waistcoat--I don't know whether you call that being injured; but I can tell you I got away from the Thugs at Strangleabad without any such injuries: umph!"

"It was fortunate that I happened to come up just when I did," observed I.

"Umph! glad you think so," was the answer; "if that stick had come down upon your skull, as the blackguard meant it to do, you would not have found it quite so fortunate, I've a notion. Umph! all the same, I'm much obliged to you; I might have been robbed and murdered too, if it had not been for you, young man, and if you'll walk home with me to the 'Hoop'--there's a name for an inn!--I'll give you a couple of sovereigns. -233--and that's more than you've earned before to-day, I'll be bound--umph!"

"I shall be delighted to see you safe home, sir, but you will excuse my declining your pecuniary offer, though I must plead guilty to the charge of not having earned as much--I believe I might say, in my whole life before."

"Umph! I see--a gentleman, eh? and I to offer him money--just like me--a lord, or a duke, I shouldn't wonder--there are all sorts and sizes of 'em here, they tell me--ask him to dinner. Umph! perhaps you'll do me the honour of dining with me, young man--my lord, I mean--mulligatawny--cat smothered in rice, which they call curry--kibobs, and kickshaws--the cook is not so bad for a white; but you should go to India if you care about eating--that's the place for cookery, sir."

"I shall have much pleasure in accepting your invitation," replied I, "if you will allow me to run away directly after dinner: I am reading for my degree, and time is precious with me just now."

"Umph! so it should be always. I see, now I come to look at you, you are one of the cap-and-gown gentlemen." (Then came an aside--"Cap, indeed!

it's a fool's cap would fit one half of 'em best!") "Pray, may I ask what college you belong to, Mr. ----?"

"Legh is my name, sir--Legh of Trinity."

"Umph! Trinity; just the man I wanted to get hold of. My name's Frampton, Mr. Lee: they know me well at the India House, sir. When we've had a bit of dinner, and washed this horrid fog out of our throats with a few gla.s.ses of wine, I shall be glad to ask you a question or two.

Umph!"

"Any information it may be in my power to afford you," I began----

"That'll do, sir, that'll do," was the reply. "Perhaps you won't be quite so ready when you hear what it is I want." Then, in an undertone--"Tell me a parcel of lies, most likely; I know how these young scamps hang by one another, and think it high fun 'to do the governor,' as they call it. Umph!"

On our arrival at the Hoop we were ushered into one of the best sitting-rooms the inn afforded, where a blazing fire soon effaced all traces of the wet-blanket-like fog in which we had been so lately enveloped. I was shown into a comfortable dressing-room to get ready for dinner, an opportunity of which I availed myself to render my appearance as unlike what it had been in former days as circ.u.mstances would allow, before again subjecting myself -234--to Mr. Framptqn's scrutiny. For this purpose, I combed my hair back from my face as far as possible, and brushed my whiskers--an acquisition of which I had only lately become possessed--as prominently forward as the growth of the crop permitted. I poked my s.h.i.+rt-collar entirely out of sight, and tied my black neckcloth stiffly up under my chin, and finally b.u.t.toned my coat, so as to show off the breadth of my chest and shoulders to the greatest advantage.

Thus accoutred, and drawing myself up to my full height, I hastened to rejoin Mr. Frampton. My arrangements seemed thoroughly to have answered their purpose, for he gazed at me without evincing the slightest symptom of recognition. He shook me by the hand, however, and thanked me more cordially than he had yet done for the a.s.sistance rendered him, and then rang for dinner. The bill of fare embraced all the Asiatic luxuries he had enumerated, to which, on the strength of having invited a guest, sundry European dishes were added; and with appet.i.tes sharpened by our recent adventures, we did full justice to the good cheer that was set before us.

CHAPTER x.x.x -- MR. FRAMPTON'S INTRODUCTION TO A TIGER

"Had I been seized by a hungry tiger, I would have been a breakfast to the beast."

--_Shakspeare_.

"He started Like one who sees a spectre, and exclaimed, 'Blind that I was to know him not till now!'"

--_Southey_.

"Go to, you are a counterfeit knave!"--_Shakspeare_.

"I HOPE you feel no ill effects from your adventure, sir: you resisted the fellow's attack most spiritedly, and would have beaten him off, I believe, if you had possessed a more serviceable weapon than an umbrella," observed I to Mr. Frampton, as we drew our chairs to the fire after dinner.

"Umph! all right, sir, all right: a little stiff or so across the back, but not so bad as the tiger at Bundleapoor. I'm not as young as I used to be, and there's a difference between young men and old ones. Young men are all whalebone and whipcord, and it's nothing but hopping, skipping, and jumping with them all day long; when -235--you're turned of sixty-five, sir, the whalebone gets stiff, the whipcord wears out, the skip and jump take their departure, and the hop becomes an involuntary accompaniment to the rheumatism--confound it! Umph!"

"You have been in India, I presume; I think I heard you refer to some adventure with a tiger," returned I.

"I've been everywhere sir--north, south, east, and west. I ran away from school at twelve years old, because the master chose to believe one of the ushers rather than me, and flogged me for lying when I had spoken the truth. I ran away, sir, and got aboard a s.h.i.+p that was bound for the East Indies, and for five-and-forty years I never saw the white cliffs of Old England; and, when I did return, I might as well have left it alone, for all who knew and cared for me were dead and gone--all dead and gone, dead and gone!" he repeated in a tone of sorrowful earnestness. Then came an aside: "Umph! wonder what I told him that for; something for him to go and make fun of with the other young scapegraces, instead of minding their books:--just like me!"

"You must have seen many strange things, and met with various adventures worthy of note, in the course of your wanderings," remarked I.

"I must have been a fool if I hadn't," was the answer. "P'rhaps you think I was--umph! Young folks always think old ones fools, they say."

"Finish the adage, sir, that old folks know young ones to be so, and then agree with me that it is a saying founded on prejudice, and at variance with truth."

"Umph! strong words, young gentleman, strong words. I will agree with you so far, that there are old fools as well as young ones--old fools, who, in their worldly wisdom, stigmatise the generous impulses and warm affections of youth as folly, who may yet live to regret the feelings they have crushed, and the affections they have alienated, and find out that the things which they deemed folly may prove in the end the truest wisdom." Then came the soliloquy: "There I go again--just like me!

something else for him to laugh at; don't think he will, though--seems a good lad--wish t'other boy may be like him--umph!" He paused for a minute, and then observed abruptly, "Umph! about the tiger at Bundleapoor. You call to-night's an adventure, sir: wonder what you'd have said if you'd been there!"

"As I was not, would it be asking too great a favour, if I request you to relate the anecdote?"

"Aye, boy, boy, I see you know how to come round an -236--old traveller: set him gossiping about all the fine things he has seen and done in his younger days, and you win his heart at once. Well, fill your gla.s.s, sir, and we'll see about it," was the reply.

I obeyed, Mr. Frampton followed my example, and, after sipping his wine, and grunting several times to clear his throat, began the following recital:--

"Umph! ha! let me recollect. When I was a young shaver, having lived in the world some twenty years or so, I was engaged as a sort of supernumerary clerk in the house of Wilson and Brown at Calcutta; and, having no one else who could be so easily spared, they determined to despatch me on a business negotiation to one of the native princes, about eight hundred miles up the country.

"I travelled with a party of the -- Dragoons, commanded by a Captain Slingsby, a man about five years older than myself, and as good a fellow as ever lived. Well, somehow or other, he took a great fancy to me, and nothing would do but that I should accompany him in all his sporting expeditions--for I should tell you that he was a thorough sportsman, and, I believe, entertained some wild notion that he should be able to make one of me. One unfortunate morning he came into my tent, and woke me out of a sound sleep into which I had fallen, after being kept awake half the night by the most diabolical howls and screams that ever were heard out of bedlam, expecting every minute to see some of the performers step in to sup, not with, but upon, me.

"'Come, Frampton, wake up, man,' cried Slingsby; 'here's great and glorious news.'

"'What is it?' said I--'have they found another hamper of ale among the baggage?'

"'Ale! nonsense,' was the reply. 'A s.h.i.+kkaree (native hunter) has just come into camp to say that a young bullock was carried off yesterday, and is lying half eaten in the jungle about a mile from this place; so at last, my boy, I shall have the pleasure of introducing you to a real live tiger.'

"'Thank ye,' said I, 'you're very kind; but if it's at all inconvenient to you this morning you can put it off: another day will do quite as well for me--I'm not in the least hurry.'

"It was of no use, however; all I got for my pains was a poke in the ribs, and an injunction to lose no time in getting ready.