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'Casa Rhiannah?'
She rolled her eyes. 'It's what my mates Harriet and Sara started calling it, because I lived here alone. Like a weird, crazy old loser hermit! I guess now we can call it Casa Rhiannah Tessa. Has a nice ring to it, don't you think?'
'Yes,' I replied, shyly.
'So anyway,' Rhiannah went on, smiling, 'It's getting pretty close to breakfast time, so we should think about heading. I'm totally stuffed. I didn't get in 'til two, and you were dead to the world with no blankets on. You don't like blankets?'
'I was too hot.'
'Yeah, they overheat the c.r.a.p out of these rooms. I have no idea why. Maybe Princess Charlotte complained about it being too cold once.'
'You call her that, too?' I asked. 'Erin called her that.'
'Everybody calls her that. Charlotte Lord is the biggest princess this side of England. I feel so sorry for you, having to have her as your mentor.' calls her that. Charlotte Lord is the biggest princess this side of England. I feel so sorry for you, having to have her as your mentor.'
'She's not so bad,' I said, feeling like I should defend Charlotte. After all, she had been very helpful to me yesterday, showing me where everything was, and where to go, and how to act, and introducing me to people I should know.
'She's not so bad because you haven't got on her bad side side yet. And, trust me, that's really easy to do. Charlotte has very ... particular ideas about what she likes and doesn't like. It's very easy to p.i.s.s her off.' yet. And, trust me, that's really easy to do. Charlotte has very ... particular ideas about what she likes and doesn't like. It's very easy to p.i.s.s her off.'
'p.i.s.s her off?'
I hadn't heard that expression before. I mean, I had heard the word 'p.i.s.s' used as another word for urination, but I a.s.sumed (and hoped) that Rhiannah wasn't wasn't talking about urination. That would be rather odd. And unsanitary. talking about urination. That would be rather odd. And unsanitary.
'You know, make her angry,' said Rhiannah.
'Strange expression,' I murmured.
'Yeah, I suppose it is.' She nodded thoughtfully. 'Anyway, enough about Her Royal Up-herself-ness. Just take the warning on board, okay? If you want to be all matey mate with her, that's your choice and I won't think any less of you, but just, you know, be careful. And I would also advise against telling her anything personal. That girl might only be a princess in most ways, but she is definitely the queen queen of gossip at Cascade Falls. Be a bit wary, okay?' of gossip at Cascade Falls. Be a bit wary, okay?'
'I will,' I said, nodding.
'Right! Now we've sorted that one out, what is your stance on waffles?'
'Waffles?'
Another word I didn't know. I wondered if it had something to do with urination too. I hoped not.
'Oh, geez! Wow. You don't know waffles? Seriously? Okay, mate. Here's the plan: we get up, we go and shower '
'Shower?'
I could feel the scars on my back begin to burn and throb. I winced. They'd hurt before, but not like this. The pain was bad, but my anxiety was worse.
I didn't want to shower.
I didn't want anybody else to see my scars.
I didn't want them to think I was strange strange.
My heart started beating very quickly and the palms of my hands felt sticky with sweat. 'Do we ... I mean ... the showers ...'
'Oh, they're really good showers here, don't worry!' said Rhiannah. 'If you've been to other boarding schools, with cold water, or water that cuts out after a minute or, you know, no shower curtains or whatever, this is not like that. You get your very own big stall, and those posh nozzles where you can change the water pressure, and they have sw.a.n.ky smelly shampoo and soap and moisturiser in these pump things that stick on the wall, and heated towel racks and everything! It's heaven!'
'So, it's private?' I asked. I didn't care about water pressure or pump things or hot towels. All I wanted to know was that n.o.body else was going to see my scars.
'Oh, yeah!' said Rhiannah, smiling. 'No ripping back the curtains to check you're was.h.i.+ng properly here. I mean, you have a timer so you don't waste water, but that's about it. So, plan? Shower time and then waffle time?'
'I really do want to know what a waffle is is before I say it is waffle time,' I said, firmly. I didn't want to get myself into anything unsavoury. before I say it is waffle time,' I said, firmly. I didn't want to get myself into anything unsavoury.
Rhiannah rolled her eyes. 'Can't you just trust me? No? Okay, it's a breakfast item. And it's good. That's all I'm going to tell you. Is that enough?'
I nodded. 'That's enough.'
'Well, thank Mother Earth for that. Shall we go?'
Rhiannah held out a pale hand to me and I took it. I watched as the copper bangle slid down her arm and settled on her wrist. Her eyes followed me. 'It's a family thing,' she said, very casually considering the way she had reacted yesterday. 'An heirloom. You really like it, don't you?'
I nodded.
'That's a worry,' she said.
Have you ever had waffles, Connolly?
If you haven't, and I mean this with the utmost fervour and seriousness, you really must do it! must do it!
Waffles are just the most wondrous thing that was ever invented! They are crunchy and yet soft; sweet and yet savoury; filling and yet oh, so very light and I loved them so much I had four! With ice cream as well! The smell of them hit me long before I reached the dining hall (the cafeteria cafeteria). 'Oh, they smell wonderful!' I exclaimed.
'You can smell them already?' asked Rhiannah, her eyebrows raised, and I was reminded yet again how things sights, smells, noises happen more powerfully for me than for others. I was embarra.s.sed again, but the feeling faded as soon as I took my first bite. I swear to you, Connolly, I had never eaten anything so heavenly. If it wasn't for the fear that I might get fat, and weak, weak, I would have eaten I would have eaten five five waffles! waffles!
As I ate, I looked about the cafeteria at my new schoolmates. I was disconcerted to see that some of them were looking back at me. Some smiled when I caught their eye. Some looked away quickly and whispered to their friends.
'They're just interested in you 'cos you're new,' said Rhiannah's friend Harriet. 'It was the same when we we started. Don't worry about it. They'll get sick of you.' started. Don't worry about it. They'll get sick of you.'
I nodded mutely. I could feel my heart quickening, and a p.r.i.c.kle of sweat on the back of my neck. The cafeteria was just a bit too busy. There were too many people. I was used to quiet.
The hospital was quiet.
And maybe I had liked quiet before before as well. My aversion to the bustle and clatter seemed to come from deep within me. as well. My aversion to the bustle and clatter seemed to come from deep within me.
I am Tessa. I like quiet.
'Of course, you know they're completely bad for you,' said Rhiannah, pointing at the waffle suspended midway to my mouth. 'You'll be as round as a wombat if you eat even one more. And then Princess Charlotte will definitely hate you. Although, to be honest, I actually don't think she likes you all that much right now. Not that that's a bad thing.'
'Why doesn't she like me?' I asked, swinging my head around to look for Charlotte's table.
Sure enough, Charlotte and every single one of her pretty friends were very obviously glowering at me. It was quite a terrifying sight.
'What did I do wrong?' I asked, looking back at Rhiannah and her friends.
'You sat with us instead of her,' said Harriet, shrugging and looking at me as though I were stupid for not realising this myself.
Harriet was one of Rhiannah's two best friends. She had dark hair, like Rhiannah's, but hers had sunny streaks running through the black. Her eyes were lighter than Rhiannah's a sort of golden brown. Her features were all quite sharp, but her face was friendly. She was taller than Rhiannah, and very thin and wiry. She looked like she should be a long distance runner. 'Field sports, actually,' she'd said, smiling, when I asked. 'Long jump, javelin, triple jump. You name it. I'm not really all that into shot put. I don't have the leg strength for it. But, apart from that, if it's a field sport, it's my bag.'
'Your bag?' I asked, wondering how a sport could also be a bag.
'My thing thing, you know? I love it!' She grinned so hard I thought her face would break in two, and I liked her immediately, nearly as much as Rhiannah.
Rhiannah's other best friend was called Sara. Sara wore thick-framed gla.s.ses and wore her black ringlets in pigtail bunches on the sides of her head. Her face was rounder than Harriet's, and softer, and it wore a permanently perplexed and anxious expression. When she talked, it was at a pace so rapid I sometimes had trouble making out one word from another.
I immediately noticed that both of the girls were wearing copper bangles like Rhiannah's, but with slightly different patterns on them. I loved those bangles. I wanted one very badly. I wondered if perhaps, should I become very good friends with Rhiannah and the others, they might let me have one too.
But Rhiannah had said that her bangle was a family heirloom.
Perhaps Rhiannah and Harriet and Sara were related. Perhaps they were cousins, and the bangles were some sort of family tradition. The girls did all look quite similar, with their pale skin and dark hair and eyes. I asked Rhiannah.
'Nope,' she said. 'It's just that all the best people have black hair.'
My hand shot up to my own sandy crop, and Rhiannah laughed and said, 'Well, apart from you, obviously! Though, you know, a couple of shades lighter and you'd be in Princess Charlotte territory, and we really don't wanna go there.'
I could feel Princess Charlotte's eyes stabbing two large holes in the back of my head, like icicle daggers.
'Is that really it?' I asked. 'Is she glaring because I am sitting with you? Because she didn't seem to mind at all when I asked her.'
Charlotte had just c.o.c.ked her pretty head to one side and said, 'Really? Rhiannah? You'd prefer to sit with her?'
'She's my roommate,' I replied. 'And she promised to teach me about waffles. If you would prefer me to sit with you ...'
'No, no! Of course! You sit with Rhiannah, if that's what you really really want,' Charlotte said, smiling, as usual, with her mouth and not her eyes. want,' Charlotte said, smiling, as usual, with her mouth and not her eyes.
'Thanks!' I said, and dashed off to Rhiannah and my waffles.
At the time, it seemed like everything was fine. As I thought back, though, I could hear a tiny hint of scorn in Charlotte's voice; a tenseness to her smile.
'She's not going to act hurt in front of her friends, is she?' said Rhiannah. 'That wouldn't be cool. That would make her look like she cared about you which, obviously, if you are going to hang out with us, she won't any more.'
'Why would that be so?' I asked, feeling quite bewildered.
'Because Charlotte knows what she likes, and she doesn't like us. She likes pink, and she likes Sarah Brightman and Vanessa Mae, and she likes maths and science, but she's not very keen on any of the arty subjects, and she likes her hair in a bun, or in a braid, and she likes tinned peaches but not waffles, and she thinks reading anything other than books for school is a waste of time, and she is allowed to have a television in her room because the people in her common room were getting sick of her only wanting to watch English period dramas, and she doesn't like us because we're not perfect, and so if you hang around with us you you won't be perfect either, and also, you would have betrayed her by choosing to be with us instead of her and her friends, and so she will probably hate you,' said Sara. won't be perfect either, and also, you would have betrayed her by choosing to be with us instead of her and her friends, and so she will probably hate you,' said Sara.
She said it without taking one single breath, and I felt as if my brain was going to explode from absorbing so many words in so little time.
'Was your old school really small?' asked Harriet. 'I mean, this stuff is "clique 101": "Don't mess with the in-crowd or they will mess you back". It's the first thing you learn in high school. I'm guessing your old school was small, so you didn't have cliques?'
'Yes,' I said, not trusting myself to elaborate more.
'Right,' said Sara, smiling. 'I was wondering why you were so clueless.'
I turned around and looked at Charlotte again.
She was still staring at me and I felt cold all over.
Part of me wanted to walk straight over to her and say, 'I'm sorry, Charlotte. I shouldn't have sat with Harriet and Sara and Rhiannah. I will definitely sit with you from now on. Just please, stop glaring at me like that. It's scary.'
A bigger part, though, thought of how Charlotte and her friends didn't smile with their eyes, and how they only talked about boys and makeup and clothes, and how it bored me, and how sitting with Harriet and Sara and Rhiannah and eating waffles was much more fun.
If I had had sat with Charlotte, I might not have been allowed to eat waffles. And that would have been a tragedy. sat with Charlotte, I might not have been allowed to eat waffles. And that would have been a tragedy.
I also didn't really think I wanted wanted to be friends with someone who wouldn't let me be friends with anyone except the people she to be friends with someone who wouldn't let me be friends with anyone except the people she told told me I could be friends with. me I could be friends with.
And I definitely didn't want to be friends with someone who wanted perfection. I thought of my scars, and the way my instincts sometimes told me to do strange things to bay and howl. I thought of my lost memories. I thought of the memories I did did have, about being discovered on a mountain looking like a cave-person. If Charlotte knew all that, I was certain she would not think me perfect. have, about being discovered on a mountain looking like a cave-person. If Charlotte knew all that, I was certain she would not think me perfect.
I looked away from Charlotte's table back towards Rhiannah and her friends, and I smiled at them. 'I don't mind,' I said. 'I don't mind if she hates me. As long as I have waffles everything will be okay.'
Rhiannah snorted. 'You're hilarious!' she said. She put a pale hand on my forearm. 'Seriously, though, mate, you'll have us as well, okay? You're my roommate. I've got your back.'
'My back?' I blurted, feeling my heart quicken and my muscles tense.
'Yeah, you know. We'll look out for you,' said Harriet.
My body melted with relief.
'Thanks,' I said.
Rhiannah put squeezed my arm. 'We'll protect you from the evil princess,' she said. 'We can be pretty tough, when we want to be.'
I didn't take Rhiannah and her friends wholly seriously when they said I might need protecting from Charlotte. She was, after all, only a girl, and I hadn't done anything really really bad to offend her or make her dislike me. bad to offend her or make her dislike me.
At least, I didn't think I had. I wasn't rude or impolite. I was very courteous and grateful for all of her help.
And yet she seemed very quickly to go from friend to enemy. It was horrible, Connolly! One moment, she was hooking her arm through mine and showing me to her friends as though I was some sort of prize, and the next she had turned against me like a contrary wind.
I first got an inkling of it when I went down to breakfast the day after the Day of Waffles (as I will now always remember it). For the rest of the Day of Waffles I had floated around on a happy, sugary cloud, so perhaps Charlotte's rejection of me had begun then and I had just simply ignored it. We'd shared no cla.s.ses for the rest of the day, and at lunch time, I encountered Claudia outside the music room and we stayed there, on the steps, talking about waffles and music. Claudia did not like the same singers as Charlotte. She said she preferred music that was "alternative". When she asked what I liked, I replied that I liked folk music, as I had a vague recollection of banjos and violins. 'Oh, you mean like Bob Dylan?' she said. I nodded, since it was less embarra.s.sing to lie than have to look a fool once more for not knowing.
I enjoyed talking to Claudia. She wasn't as fun and silly as Rhiannah and her friends, but she was amiable and kind. She made me feel welcome.
The next morning, I walked into the cafeteria alone; Rhiannah was already gone when I woke up. A note pinned to the back of our bedroom door read: 'Off for an early morning walk with H & S. See you in cla.s.s later. Enjoy brekkie. Bacon and eggs. Mmmmmmm. R.'
As I walked towards the cafeteria I was intoxicated by a heady smell of frying food. By the time I entered, my mouth had begun to water and I found myself smiling giddily. I did love breakfast.
I walked over to the cafeteria matron, Mrs Butcher, and asked for a plate.