Mother's Remedies Part 182

Setting the Table.--The "best cloth" and napkins are brought out for the dinner party. The cloth must be laid with mathematical exactness, its center exactly on the center of the table. The centerpiece, almost invariably of flowers, only occasionally of fruit, is also exactly placed.

This should be low; it is awkward not to be able to see one's vis-a-vis, and the hostess should be able to command an uninterrupted view of her table, so that if the waitress omits any service she may by a glance direct her to supply it. The arrangement should be graceful and pretty, and, in summer, garden flowers may be used with propriety. The flowers give the keynote of the color scheme; dinner cards, bonbons, ices and creams and the decorations of the small cakes usually served with the dessert, conform to it. Candelabra are less used than at one time, but are by no means "out." A handsome silver candelabra may be used as a centerpiece, its base banked in flowers. On a square or oblong table, candlesticks with shades give a touch of color that relieves the whiteness of napery and gla.s.s.

There is a plate--your handsomest--at each place; a napkin squarely folded and lying flat; a row of forks at the left, oyster fork outside, then fish fork, dinner and salad fork, four in all, laid in the order in which they will be used. Knives are at the right of the napkin, always two, a large and a small one. Fas.h.i.+on has re-introduced the steel-bladed knife for the meat course; it is surprising to notice how much more tender meat is than it used to be when we tried to cut it with the silver knives. The soup-spoon is laid at the top of the plate. The salad fork may be brought in with the salad if preferred, spoons with the dessert and coffee. Grape fruit is eaten with an orange spoon, laid at the right. No "fancy folding"

of napkins is permissible. The gla.s.ses stand at the top of the plate, a little to the right. Small cut gla.s.s or fancy dishes containing the relishes are placed near the corners of the table within the circle of plates if the table is square; if it is round they are so arranged so as to balance each other in the form of a square. There may be two of nuts and two of stuffed olives or of bonbons. Individual salt cellars are at the top of the plate; a roll is folded in the napkin, sometimes laid on the bread-and-b.u.t.ter plate, which is placed at the left. Such rolls should be small and well-baked. At formal dinners no b.u.t.ter is served, and the plates are omitted. Finger bowls are brought in after the ices or the pudding. They are on a small plate on which is a doily, and the fruit knife, if to be used, is on the plate. The guest lays bowl and doily at his right, lifting the two together, the plate being for fruit, if any is served. If no fruit, the bowl is left on the plate.

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LUNCHEONS.

The luncheon is a less elaborate function than the dinner, but ranks next it in point of compliment and display. The "stand-up" or buffet luncheon is much less popular than formerly, in fact even at the so-called buffet luncheons the guests are now seated at small tables accommodating four.

Invitations are sent out ten days or two weeks in advance, and require prompt replies.

Formal Luncheons.--Save in a less elaborate menu, the formal luncheon differs very little from the dinner, except that the latter is at seven o'clock, and the luncheon almost invariably at one. The menu generally begins with grape fruit, served in gla.s.ses on small plates and doilies, and on the table when the guests are seated. An orange spoon is used. The table is set as for dinner, save that less silver is laid. Bouillon, served in bouillon cups, with a spoon on the saucer may follow. Then may come lobster a la Newburg; sweet-breads and peas; salad; ices and coffee.

In place of the sweet-breads one may serve squab on toast, fillet of beef, or broiled chicken; peas, beets, and potatoes cut in b.a.l.l.s and cooked in deep fat may accompany anyone of these. The meat, cut in portions, and surrounded by mounds of the vegetables, is often served from a large platter, from which the guests help themselves. The hostess is served first; this is, that, in case any unfamiliar dish is served, she may show how it is to be handled. The lady on her right is next in order of serving. The same etiquette in regard to serving, changing plates, etc., is observed as at the dinner, save that the rolls are on bread-and-b.u.t.ter plates instead of being folded in the napkin. The decorations, ornamental dishes, candies, and the like are used as at a dinner.

Minor Particulars.--The roast never figures at a luncheon; the courses consist largely of what are called entrees, the idea being that the repast is of a lighter character than a dinner. The salad is a special feature; it may be chicken, Waldorf, fruit, or any kind preferred, but must be carefully studied in its relation to the other dishes.

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The guests keep on their hats during the luncheon, removing the gloves as they are seated; at an informal luncheon the gloves are removed in the dressing room.

Very often bridge or some other card game follows the luncheon. If not, guests are not expected to remain more than half an hour after leaving the table.

The luncheon--never say lunch--is a favorite form of entertainment for girls. In this case the dishes served are light and delicate. Mushrooms on toast, oyster patties or croquettes, a salad, and ices; the menu prefaced by grape fruit and bouillon, are often thought sufficient for a girl's luncheon. Sweets are served freely for them.

It is no longer thought correct to go to extremes in carrying out a "color scheme." Sandwiches are not tied up with ribbons, nor cakes colored to correspond with the preferred hue. Flowers, ices, and the decorations on the small cakes pa.s.sed with the dessert are quite sufficient. Candles, if used, should have shades to correspond.

Large Luncheons.--The large luncheon has few friends these days; it is too heterogeneous an affair. Those invited feel it is an easy way of paying off social obligations; few find it entirely enjoyable. There is more or less of a crush; one experiences difficulty in finding a table and being served; it is not appetizing to note evidences that others have eaten at the same table and departed. And one is likely to be seated with the wrong people and thus miss much that belongs with and makes pleasant the smaller affair.

No woman need hesitate at inviting a few friends to have luncheon with her. She may prepare a simple meal, and if it is nicely served and she herself gives the cordiality and the conversational impetus that "keeps things going," her guests will find it enjoyable. She may adopt as much of the regular method of serving as befits her home and its resources, but she must make her table as beautiful as possible, and she must not serve "stewed hostess."

TABLE ETIQUETTE.

We have seen how a table should be laid and a meal served; now let us see how it should be eaten:

There is no situation in which one's good breeding is so much in evidence as at the table. For that reason, mothers should begin to train their children in infancy to correct usage. As soon as a child is able to hold a spoon and fork, he should be taught how to hold them properly, and the training should be continued until the right habit is established.

One should not be seated until the lady of the house is seated, unless especially requested to do so. Children should observe this rule as rigidly as that which requires the removal of the hat on entering the house.

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At the Table.--On being seated, the napkin is unfolded and laid across the lap. It is more correct to only unfold one-half, that is, open it at the center fold. One is not supposed to require further protection than from the accidental crumb. On no account should it be used as a bib, or be tucked in the dress or waistcoat.

Grape fruit is eaten from an orange spoon. If oysters are served raw, they must not be cut but eaten whole.

Soup must be taken from the side of the spoon, quietly, with no hissing or other sound, nor should the spoon be so full that it drips over. The motion of the spoon in filling it, is away from instead of towards the person; and tilting the plate to secure the last spoonful is bad form.

Crackers are never served with soup: croutons--small squares of bread toasted very hard and brown, or small H. & P. biscuits are pa.s.sed. These are never put into the soup, but are eaten from the hand. Neither soup nor fish should be offered the second time.

Fish is generally eaten with a fork and a bit of bread, though silver fish knives are in occasional use. The entree which follows the fish should be eaten with the fork only. A mouthful of meat is cut as required; it is never buried in potato or any vegetable and then conveyed to the mouth.

Vegetables are no longer served in "birds' bath-tubs," as some wit once called the individual vegetable dishes, but are cooked sufficiently dry to be served on the plate with the meat. All vegetables are eaten with the fork, so also jellies, chutney, etc., served with the meat course.

Using the Fork.--The fork laid farthest from the plate is to be used for the first course requiring such a utensil; the others are used in their order. The knife is held in the right hand; by the handle, not the blade.

The fork should not be held like a spoon, or a shovel, but more as one would hold a pencil or pen; it is raised laterally to the mouth. The elbow is not to be projected, or crooked outward, in using either knife or fork; that is a very awkward performance. The fork should never be over-burdened. The knife is never lifted to the mouth; it is said that "only members of the legislature eat pie with a knife nowadays." The handle of neither knife or fork may rest on the table nor the former be laid across the edge of the plate.

Tender meat, like the breast of chickens, may be cut with the fork. A bone is never taken in the fingers, the historic anecdote about Queen Victoria to the contrary notwithstanding. The table manners of the twentieth century are not Early Victorian. Olives and celery are correctly laid on the bread-and-b.u.t.ter plate. The former is never dipped in one's salt cellar; a small portion of salt is put on the edge of the plate; both are eaten from the fingers.

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Vegetables, Fruits, etc.--Green corn is seldom served on the cob at ceremonious dinners. If it is served, it is to be broken in medium-sized pieces and eaten from the cob, a rather messy process, and one not pretty to observe. The fastidious avoid it. If eaten, the piece is held between the fingers of one hand. To take an unbroken ear in both hands and gnaw the length of it suggests the manners of an animal never named in polite society.

It is correct to take up asparagus by the stalk, and eat it from the fingers, but the newer and more desirable custom is to cut off the edible portion with knife and fork. Lettuce is never cut with a knife; a fork is used, the piece rolled up and conveyed to the mouth.

Hard cheese may be eaten from the fingers; soft cheeses, like Neufchatel, Brie, and the like, are eaten with the fork, or a bit is spread on a morsel of bread and conveyed to the mouth with the fingers.

A soft cake is eaten with a fork. The rule is that whatever can be eaten with a fork shall be so eaten.

Roman punch and sherbets require a spoon. Berries, peaches and cream, custards, preserves, jellies, call for the spoon. Strawberries are often served as a first course in their season. They are then arranged with their hulls and a portion of stem left on, dipped in powdered sugar and eaten from the fingers. A little mound of the sugar is pressed into shape in the center of the small plate and the berries laid around it.

Peaches, pears, and apples are peeled with the fruit knife, cut in quarters or eighths, and eaten from the fingers. Bananas are stripped of the skin, cut in pieces with a fork and eaten from it. Oranges are cut in two across the sections and eaten with an orange spoon. Plums, like olives, are eaten by biting off the pulp without taking the stone in the mouth. Pineapple, unless shredded or cut up, requires both knife and fork; it is usually prepared for more convenient eating. Grapes, which should be washed by letting water from the faucet run over them and laid on a folded towel until the moisture drips off, are eaten from behind the half-closed hand, which receives the skins and seeds, then to be deposited on the plate.

If the small cup of coffee--the demi-ta.s.se--is served, the small after-dinner coffee spoon is necessary. Cream is seldom served with the black coffee--cafe noir--with which a meal concludes, cut loaf sugar is pa.s.sed.

The Spoon.--The spoon must never be left in the cup, no matter what beverage is served. Most of us have seen some absent-minded individual (we will charitably suppose him absent-minded instead of ignorant), stir his coffee round and round and round, creating a miniature whirlpool and very likely slopping it over into the saucer; then, prisoning the spoon with a finger, drink half the cup's contents at a gulp. To do this is positively vulgar. Stir the coffee or tea very slightly, just enough to stir the cream and sugar with it, then drink in sips. To take either from the teaspoon is bad form. Bread is broken, not cut, and only a small portion b.u.t.tered at a time. Do not play with bread crumbs or spoon, etc., during the progress of a meal. Leave knife and fork on the plate, handles side by side, when it is pa.s.sed for a second helping, and at a conclusion of a course, or the meal, lay them in the same position, points of the fork upward.

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Finger Bowls.--When finger bowls are brought, the tips of the fingers are dipped in the bowl and dried on the napkin. Men may lift the moistened fingers to the lips; women seldom do this, but wipe the lips with the napkin. At any function the napkin is not folded, but laid at the side of the plate at the conclusion of the repast. If a guest for a day or so, or for more than one meal, note what your hostess does with her napkin and follow her. If a guest at only one meal, never fold the napkin. Be careful not to throw it down so carelessly that it is stained with coffee, fruit, or fruit juices; your hostess will thank you for your consideration.

Be ready to rise when your hostess rises; you do not push your chair into place; simply rise and leave it. Rise on the side of your chair so you will not have to go around it in following your hostess to the drawing room.

RECEPTIONS.

When invitations are sent out for a reception, the recipient dons her handsomest afternoon gown for the occasion. This may be a dressy tailored suit; by this is meant one not severely simple; or she may wear some handsome trained gown under a long coat. Small cards for presentation at the door are sometimes enclosed with invitations to a large reception or buffet luncheon, since "the pushers" have been known to present themselves at such functions without having been invited. These cards are handed to the man who opens the carriage door. An awning extends from the door to the curb, and strips of carpet are laid under it, A maid opens the door and directs guests to the dressing room, where wraps are laid aside, hats and gloves being retained.

Receiving.--The hostess stands near the door of the drawing room, welcoming her guests with hand and smile. Next to her stand the ladies who receive with her. During the hour of arrival there is seldom opportunity for more than a word of greeting, and one should not linger but pa.s.s on down the line. A reception is often given to some visiting stranger, who is introduced by the hostess.

The guests then circulate through the rooms, greeting acquaintances, and drifting eventually to the dining room, where refreshments are served.

They may stay as long as they find it agreeable, within the hours named on the card of invitation, but people seldom stay more than an hour.

The hostess remains near the door after the rush is over to greet the belated guest and bid adieu to those who are leaving.

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