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In the Devil's Garden_ A Sinful History of Forbidden Food Part 6

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Chili peppers have been a.s.sociated with violence since Christopher Columbus met them in the New World five hundred years ago. He'd been hoping to make a fortune buying India's precious black pepper. When he realized he'd failed to reach Asia, the wily Portuguese simply dubbed the brown-skinned Americans Indians Indians, and their piquant spice chili pepper, chili pepper, to convince his backers they'd almost gotten to India and so ensure funding for the next expedition. The so-called Indians proved exceptionally generous with their spices. They literally threw them at the Europeans in the form of "chili bombs"- calabashes full of smoldering to convince his backers they'd almost gotten to India and so ensure funding for the next expedition. The so-called Indians proved exceptionally generous with their spices. They literally threw them at the Europeans in the form of "chili bombs"- calabashes full of smoldering habaneros habaneros -that they tossed over Columbus's fortress walls in an attempt to drive the foreigners out of their country. While not as theatrical as the medieval habit of tossing plague-infected cadavers into besieged cities, it was probably quite effective; burning chilies emit gases that make it almost impossible to breathe. -that they tossed over Columbus's fortress walls in an attempt to drive the foreigners out of their country. While not as theatrical as the medieval habit of tossing plague-infected cadavers into besieged cities, it was probably quite effective; burning chilies emit gases that make it almost impossible to breathe.

The Native Americans (Mayans, Aztecs, etc.) have used chilies like this for ages. Mayans disciplined children by holding them over smoldering jalapenos, a child-rearing trick still popular among their descendants in the Mexican highlands. Ancient Panamanians strung them on their canoe prows to discourage marauding sharks. When the Incas of South America met Europeans in battle, they threw the invaders off balance by burning huge piles of rocoto rocoto chilies (so named because they're potent enough to raise the dead) as the two armies collided. The more peaceful Hopi Indians simply placed rows of them on their doorsteps to keep out the white spirits. It didn't work, but people today still hang chili crosses over cribs to ward off evil. chilies (so named because they're potent enough to raise the dead) as the two armies collided. The more peaceful Hopi Indians simply placed rows of them on their doorsteps to keep out the white spirits. It didn't work, but people today still hang chili crosses over cribs to ward off evil.

The chili pepper's violent nature derives from a tasteless chemical called capsaicin that's so potent 1 part in 11 million causes a sizzling sensation. It's akin to putting a lit match in your mouth, and biting into a well-endowed chili causes the body to produce a host of compounds designed to help us deal with danger or pain. The first high comes from adrenaline, a natural chemical that sometimes enables people to perform incredible acts of strength and violence. This rush is probably why fighting c.o.c.ks in Mexico are force-fed chilies before they go into battle, and why the government of Peru banned hot-pepper sauce in their prisons. This initial buzz is followed by the release of endorphins produced by the body to dull pain. Chilies, however, produce only the illusion of heat by depleting nerve endings of something called Substance P. Since there's no "real" pain to dull, the endorphins produce a quasi-narcotic bliss instead. This, in turn, leads to what Dr. Andrew Weil has called "mouth surfing," where groups of gastro-m.a.s.o.c.h.i.s.tic degenerates spend their evenings going from pasilla pasilla to to serrano serrano to to chipotle chipotle in search of ever-greater "rushes that enforces concentration and brings about a high state of consciousness" until, ears steaming, eyes popping out of their sockets and howling at the moon, they seek refuge in a cool, crisp Corona. It's the equivalent of bungee jumpingchili scholars call it "constrained risk seeking"- and has been fetis.h.i.+zed in hot-pepper sauces with names like Psycho b.i.t.c.h, Mad Dog Inferno, Sudden Death (with ginseng!) and the cla.s.sic Dave's Insanity Sauce. in search of ever-greater "rushes that enforces concentration and brings about a high state of consciousness" until, ears steaming, eyes popping out of their sockets and howling at the moon, they seek refuge in a cool, crisp Corona. It's the equivalent of bungee jumpingchili scholars call it "constrained risk seeking"- and has been fetis.h.i.+zed in hot-pepper sauces with names like Psycho b.i.t.c.h, Mad Dog Inferno, Sudden Death (with ginseng!) and the cla.s.sic Dave's Insanity Sauce.

A South American plant that produces short, intense rushes followed by a false sense of well-being. Sounds a bit like cocaine. You could even still blame the (Christopher) Colombian cartel. Perhaps it says something about our culture that although we have often outlawed foods that engender love or sloth, the one most closely a.s.sociated with anger has only been banned once. Homicide Salsa, which featured a murder victim's body outline on the label, was temporarily withdrawn from Chicago markets last year when a preacher objected that it glamorized violence.

Insanity Popcorn The nastiest, the most viciously nerve-shredding torture is generally agreed to be Dave's Insanity Sauce. It was Dave's concoction that inspired the Guatemalan Insanity Sauce that gave Homer Simpson a psychedelic experience in the cla.s.sic 1997 Simpsons episode. Dave's also has the honor of having been banned from the National Fiery Food Show in Albuquerque, New Mexico (an elderly customer tried it and suffered a slight heart attack). So beware. Creator David Hirshkop, who wears a straitjacket to chili-sauce shows, suggests that you never use more than one drop at a time. For those with more reasonable appet.i.tes, there's Temporary Insanity Sauce.

To indulge in this m.a.s.o.c.h.i.s.t-machismo, first pop 3 3 4 cup of popcorn. While it's exploding in the background, melt 2 tablespoons of b.u.t.ter with 1 tablespoon of brown sugar and 1 teaspoon of Lowry's seasoning salt (or something similar) and exactly one drop of Dave's Insanity Sauce. Melt slowly, don't brown the b.u.t.ter. Pour on finished popcorn and toss to coat. Make sure you do not get any of this stuff in your eyes. 4 cup of popcorn. While it's exploding in the background, melt 2 tablespoons of b.u.t.ter with 1 tablespoon of brown sugar and 1 teaspoon of Lowry's seasoning salt (or something similar) and exactly one drop of Dave's Insanity Sauce. Melt slowly, don't brown the b.u.t.ter. Pour on finished popcorn and toss to coat. Make sure you do not get any of this stuff in your eyes.

Stinking Infidels The Queen of Sheba's hometown is not much to look at nowadays. There're lots of empty bottles of Bijan perfume. Goats munch blue plastic trash bags. Dust. It's a dump, but three thousand years ago the town we now call Mar'ib (in Yemen) was the center of the world. Its temple to the Moon G.o.ddess was the most holy spot in Arabia. It also possessed the world's first serious dam. But the true measure of Mar'ib's sophistication was its stand against halitosis. You can read about it on some ancient bronze tablets in the Moon Temple, how the Moon G.o.ddess struck down two men with a terrible disease for the sin of having "prayed in Her temple after eating a meal of stinking plants and onions."

Their sin had been bad breath, in other words. Garlic breath to be precise, since the stinking plant mentioned is the Stinking Rose, which, along with its henchmen the onion and the leek, continues to divide the world into admirers and sworn enemies. Many office-bound h.o.m.o sapiens h.o.m.o sapiens today still forgo the herb, lest they, like the two Arabs in the inscription, offend the powers that be-just replace the word today still forgo the herb, lest they, like the two Arabs in the inscription, offend the powers that be-just replace the word G.o.ds G.o.ds with its workplace equivalent. "The G.o.ds, being imagined anthropomorphically, were held to be influenced by odor," wrote Semitic scholar K. van der Toorn in his a.n.a.lysis of the Maribean tablets. "Thus one could please the G.o.d by burning fragrant materials as a 'soothing odor' . . . and caution not to offend the deity by foul breath could be the corollary." The outrageousness of the duo's breath can be measured by the fact that they had to perform the same penance as some men who'd been caught sodomizing each other on the temple's grounds. with its workplace equivalent. "The G.o.ds, being imagined anthropomorphically, were held to be influenced by odor," wrote Semitic scholar K. van der Toorn in his a.n.a.lysis of the Maribean tablets. "Thus one could please the G.o.d by burning fragrant materials as a 'soothing odor' . . . and caution not to offend the deity by foul breath could be the corollary." The outrageousness of the duo's breath can be measured by the fact that they had to perform the same penance as some men who'd been caught sodomizing each other on the temple's grounds.

The idea that bad breath and sodomy (in church) are comparable offenses might strike some as odd, but one shouldn't underestimate how strongly people used to feel about stench. With reason. Tests indicate that people who lose their sense of smell or taste also tend to lose all s.e.xual impulses, and over 90 percent suffer serious depression. The reason for this is hard to pin down, but these senses are the only ones that interact directly with the part of the brain that controls our most primitive emotions. They have a particularly strong relations.h.i.+p to anger and fear because of their original role as a means of alerting us to dangerous predators or poisonous food. Some human behaviorists even believe the way we express anger evolved largely from our reaction to dangerous tastes, hence the peculiar facial grimaces a.s.sociated with these emotions. That's pretty d.a.m.n hard to prove, but a good indication of the extreme early importance of these senses is that our body has only four genes to govern the sense of sight, but over a thousand devoted to smell/taste.

Smelling good has always been particularly important when dealing with the G.o.ds. The world's earliest international trade routes developed to transport perfumes. Egyptians were so concerned about afterlife B.O. that they drowned their mummies in myrrh and frankincense. The first Christmas presents were perfumes, and any number of Catholic saints owe their beat.i.tude to their corpses' propensity to smell like roses. These are all what Toorn would call "soothing odors," pleasing to the G.o.ds. More pungent odors enjoyed a less-savory reputation, particularly the Allium family of onion and garlic, which is said to have sprouted from the Devil's footsteps as he fled the Garden of Eden (garlic from his left footprint, onion from his right). Egyptian priests had to abstain from the duo, and until the nineteenth century, no devout Muslim would go near his mosque smelling of the stuff. Likewise, although the Bible records how Jews pined for garlic while starving in the desert, their rules once forbade eating these delights before noon. Priests who ignored the regulation were removed from the synagogue.

Instead, garlic's powerful ectoplasmic emissions were used to inflict a supernatural violence. One Sanskrit ma.n.u.script calls it "The Slayer of Monsters," and though King Tut's mummy may have reeked of myrrh, his cronies made sure to leave a few heads of garlic in case their Pharaoh needed to fight off enemies. Thousands of years before its current California incarnation, the Persians held an annual Garlic Festival at which they served demons a dish made of garlic, rue, and vinegar. The soup was supposed to taste so bad that the spirits would leave in a huff. Babylonians held aloft a clove when exorcising possessing spirits, and Romania's cathartic dancers, the calusari calusari, used copious amounts of the raw stuff in their rituals. I will pa.s.s lightly over the obvious connection to the long-suffering vampires of central Europe.

Garlic was also employed against earthly enemies. The Hindu warrior caste was encouraged to indulge, and both Julius Caesar and Alexander the Great pledged the plant to their war G.o.ds because they believed it made their soldiers fiercer in battle. "Now bolt down these cloves of garlic," wrote the Greek playwright Aristophanes around the fourth century B.C. "Well primed with garlic you will have greater mettle to fight!" The principle is no different than howling to unnerve your foe, and no doubt the stench emanating from the mouths of Roman Legionnaires was pretty d.a.m.n shocking since their wartime staple was a brew made of raw garlic, barley, and sour wine. The Welsh claim that a famous seventh-century victory resulted from the warriors wearing cut sprigs of wild garlic in their hats. Some say the plants merely helped the Welsh soldiers recognize one another, but folklore holds it was the notoriously pungent odor of the local wild garlic that unmanned the Saxons and led to victory. The leek (as in gar-leek) remains their national plant, and its colors still adorn the flag.

The two garlic lovers from Mar'ib who offended the Moon G.o.ddess so long ago would have found none of this surprising. They knew that nothing offends like unsavory breath, and that nothing is more pleasing than an appetizing aroma. And like all men, they knew the best smell in the entire universe is of someone cooking you dinner. So when the Moon priests told them to make amends by roasting the head of a cow in the desert night, they understood its justice. Having taken away the Moon's appet.i.te with their breath, they were now obliged to restore it by sending the succulent scent of roast beef floating up to her pale face peering over the desert horizon.

Five Angry Vegetables A novice Buddhist monk once asked Lama Kalu Rimpoche whether eating garlic would prevent his attaining enlightenment. The Rimpoche replied with a parable. Many eons ago, he told the young monk, a demon drank a magic elixir to increase his powers. He flew high among the clouds and changed the color of the sea. But the G.o.ds eventually shot him down. The demon's blood fell upon the Earth, and from it sprouted garlic. This, he said, was the birth of the Five Angry Vegetables doctrine, which prohibits Buddhist monks from eating not only garlic, but also onions, chives, spring onions, and any member of the Allium family. The following deliciously crunchy-smooth dish called Lo Han Jai Lo Han Jai, or Buddhist Vegetarian Delight, is the traditional culinary embodiment of the law's principles because the absence of garlic or onion is thought to help monks control the angry pa.s.sions. Lay Chinese like to start the New Year with a dish.

There are many variations on this soothing dish, so you may adjust the following recipe according to your personal level of enlightenment. Serve with hot rice.

1 cup dried black s.h.i.+take mushrooms 12 cup dried snow fungus or cloud ear fungus 3 ounces dried bean curd stick (about 2 cups) 12 cup canned bamboo shoots, drained and sliced 2 ounces dried mung bean thread (about 1 cup) 1 cup firm fried tofu cut into 1-inch cubes 4 cups shredded Chinese or Napa cabbage 12 cup sliced carrots 3 tablespoons soy sauce 2 tablespoons sugar 3 cups water, plus water for soaking 12 cup raw peanuts 1 cup drained sliced water chestnuts 12 cup straw mushrooms 1 teaspoon oriental sesame oil Sea salt, to taste

Soak the following ingredients individually in warm water for fifteen minutes: dried black s.h.i.+take mushrooms, dried snow fungus, dried bean curd stick, and dried mung bean thread. Drain, rinse, and set aside.

If you cannot find prefried tofu, deep-fry firm tofu in a cup of oil for about five minutes, or until golden. Remove and drain on paper towels. Pour off all but 1 14 cup of the oil and return heat to medium. Add cabbage, canned bamboo shoots, and carrots. Stir-fry for one minute. Add black s.h.i.+take mushrooms, snow fungus, bean curd sticks, mung bean thread, bamboo shoots, fried tofu, soy sauce, and sugar. Mix well and add the 3 cups of water, peanuts, and all other ingredients except sesame oil. Simmer covered about fifteen or twenty minutes or until vegetables are tender. Season with salt and sesame oil. Serves 6.

Feasting to the Death When a member of the Kalauna tribe on Goodenough Island catches his wife fornicating with another fellow, his revenge is swift. He picks his best sweet potatoes. He slaughters his fattest pig. Then he throws a dinner party for the man who cuckolded him, chuckling with delight as the guest grows infuriated at such generosity. The next morning there's bound to be a knock on the husband's door, and there, as expected, stands the home-wrecker with a single, shriveled sweet potato in his left hand. He hands this to the husband. "What," sneers the husband, "is this all your garden grows?" The other guy gestures, and his friends come out of the jungle carrying baskets br.i.m.m.i.n.g with taro root and roast pig and yam and pineapples and dried fish. "You think we cannot pay back your yams?" he snickers, tossing the food at the husband's feet. "Yes, now you see that we we at least do not spend all our time bonking our wives as you do!" at least do not spend all our time bonking our wives as you do!"

The battle is on, and it continues until the one who throws the largest feast is declared victorious. This behavior, detailed in anthropologist Michael Young's Fighting with Food Fighting with Food, is actually relatively restrained. Similar orgies in nearby Indonesia involved building sixty-foot-high walls made of pigs, fish, and fruit. The Kwakiutl people of northwest Canada replaced traditional warfare with enormous potlatches, or feasts, where guests/ foes were stuffed with smoked salmon and berries, deluged with blankets and b.u.t.tons. When the guests were too full to continue eating, the merciless host simply threw food into the fire until the flames leaped ten to fifteen feet high. When the guests remained by the roaring flames-s.h.i.+vering with cold and sneering about their host's miserly heating arrangements-even more food and seal fat were tossed on the fire. If the house burned down, as it often did, the owner earned extra glory, and his guests rowed back to their island in a huff; the only way for them to avoid defeat now was to burn down an even bigger house.

These are particularly extreme examples of how people have used food to express aggression, but they are hardly unique. When the last Duke of Burgundy, Charles the Bold, wanted to underline for visiting dignitaries that his tiny kingdom remained strong, he made the banquet look like a military encampment by serving thirty pies individually enclosed in miniature tents. Each pie was gilded in gold with the initial of a town controlled by Charles's army. When another n.o.ble decided he had to resolve a conflict over who controlled the town of Breisach, he invited the feuding parties to a dinner the main dish of which consisted of two marzipan soldiers standing guard over a smoked ham. Needless to say, Breisach was noted for its outstanding smoked meats. State dinners like these were "not merely entertainments and celebrations, they were a means of a.s.serting rank and power," according to historian Stephen Mennell, and they grew increasingly popular with n.o.bility as actually going to war proved more and more inconvenient.

You would think n.o.bles must have rather looked forward to some of these skirmishes, but that all depended on the chef. When the Italian Medici family married off their son to the French princess Marguerite-Louise in 1661, the nuptial feasts clearly reflected the fact that this wedding was all about war and power, not love (the couple loathed each other so much they were officially married by proxy). One prenuptial to-do began with a huge roast guinea fowl split down the middle and opened to create a two-headed fowl to represent the Medicis' double-headed heraldic eagle. Pine nuts arranged in a flower garnished its b.r.e.a.s.t.s, and the whole thing was covered with a rainbow of colored jelly. The fowl's heads, of course, were crowned with sugar coronets picked in gold leaf. Next to this strutting symbol of Medici aggression was an elongated pie shaped into the letter S S, after the princess's nickname, and filled with layers of candied citron, pistachios, eggs, marzipan, lean ham, roast capon, sweetbreads, sugar, and cinnamon. A dish doubtless as rich and sweet as the bride herself. The piece de resistance, according to historian Elizabeth David, again celebrated the Medici power in a sumptuous dish of "pigeons en en daube daube in the Catalan manner, the b.r.e.a.s.t.s larded, first half-roasted then stewed in muscatel wine with lemon juice, powdered in the Catalan manner, the b.r.e.a.s.t.s larded, first half-roasted then stewed in muscatel wine with lemon juice, powdered mostaccioli mostaccioli [spiced and musk-scented biscuits] and pounded candied citron, this sauce to be reduced to a jelly-like consistency and poured over the cold pigeons, the dish garnished with ten rose-shaped tartlets filled with five different sweet jellies-red quince, bitter cherry, white quince, [spiced and musk-scented biscuits] and pounded candied citron, this sauce to be reduced to a jelly-like consistency and poured over the cold pigeons, the dish garnished with ten rose-shaped tartlets filled with five different sweet jellies-red quince, bitter cherry, white quince, agresta agresta and plum- the jellies stuck with little candied cinnamon sticks and pistachios, the tartlets then covered in marzipan paste in the shape of the Grand d.u.c.h.ess's oak tree arms, with a sugar icing flecked with gold." There were, of course, other and plum- the jellies stuck with little candied cinnamon sticks and pistachios, the tartlets then covered in marzipan paste in the shape of the Grand d.u.c.h.ess's oak tree arms, with a sugar icing flecked with gold." There were, of course, other amuse-gueules amuse-gueules on which to nibble, like musky confits, Tuscan spring cheeses, peach sweetmeats, and a dish of larded capons set on slices of roasted sweetbreads and on which to nibble, like musky confits, Tuscan spring cheeses, peach sweetmeats, and a dish of larded capons set on slices of roasted sweetbreads and ortolans ortolans and deep-fried pig cheeks with a thick sweet-and-sour sauce of verjuice. The only dish that apparently bothered to celebrate the joining of the two families was a parsimonious plate of blancmange shaped into the lady's heraldic lion and surrounded by the Medicis' lilies. The marriage was a disaster. and deep-fried pig cheeks with a thick sweet-and-sour sauce of verjuice. The only dish that apparently bothered to celebrate the joining of the two families was a parsimonious plate of blancmange shaped into the lady's heraldic lion and surrounded by the Medicis' lilies. The marriage was a disaster.

All this pomp and aggression sometimes spilled off the table. English Tudor mansions had a separate room where, after the main meal, guests would adjourn to nibble on sweets like twelve-foot-tall trifles, jellies, tarts, and liquor-soaked muscadines before a crowd of commoners. The feast was officially over when the host allowed the spectators to rush into the room and have a ma.s.sive food fight that would leave everybody covered head to foot.

Using dinner to sate the aggressive instinct makes the most delicious of sense. First, put the weaponry of knives and forks into your enemies' hands and let them loose on a battlefield groaning with corpses and b.l.o.o.d.y-colored liqueurs. When they lay near death in a gluttonous coma you, the host, pick up a sprig of parsley and nibble it with a patronizing air-you have proved yourself the wealthiest, the most powerful, the most capable of digesting death. You have won. Normally one goes to war and the victors feast. Here, one feasts and he who feasts best is declared the king. It's life lived in reverse, which is as it should be; Lord knows, the world only makes sense when you stand it on its head. At least that's how the Kwakiutl tribe seemed to think. "Of olden times others ill-treated our forefathers and we fought them so that the blood ran over the ground," rhapsodized one of their chiefs a hundred years ago. "But now we fight with b.u.t.ter and blankets, smiling at each other. Ah, yes, how good is the new time!"

[image]THE EIGHTH EIGHTH SIN SIN"A Cuc.u.mber should be well sliced, and dressed with pepper and vinegar, and then thrown out, as good for nothing."Samuel Johnson

When Everything Is Allowed and Nothing Has Flavor fter writing a book like this one, even casual meals can take on alarming overtones. A recent lunch with some publishers from Scotland is a case in point. It started well enough. Booze was flowing, everybody was smoking; then one of the Scots ordered a plate of steak tartare. Raw meat. I was appalled, in part because of the biblical taboo against eating blood, but also because I knew that tartare was traditionally ordered by British businessmen desirous of gaining an advantage by intimidation. I had been under the impression that this was to be a casual, get-acquainted kind of chow down. Just what the devil was going on? What was the real real agenda? Then the other publisher ordered. Sweetbreads with puff pastry. A mixed message. Puff pastry is related to the agenda? Then the other publisher ordered. Sweetbreads with puff pastry. A mixed message. Puff pastry is related to the mollet mollet bread restricted to European aristocrats; it spoke of a heartless refinement and indicated he was the brain behind whatever mischief was afoot. The ordering of a peculiar organ meat seemed another attempt to disorient me, and no doubt most Americans would have been terrified of these raw meat and organeating barbarians from Scotland. bread restricted to European aristocrats; it spoke of a heartless refinement and indicated he was the brain behind whatever mischief was afoot. The ordering of a peculiar organ meat seemed another attempt to disorient me, and no doubt most Americans would have been terrified of these raw meat and organeating barbarians from Scotland. Why, Henrietta, I done Why, Henrietta, I done hear they wear skirts and eat deep-fried pizza over there! hear they wear skirts and eat deep-fried pizza over there! But I knew better (well, actually, they But I knew better (well, actually, they do do eat deep-fried pizza in Scotland) and so when the waiter asked my pleasure, I, too, ordered sweetbreads, thus letting my lunch companions know that this Yank, at least, remained unmoved by their Neanderthal propensities and was as bloodthirsty as even the most literate of Scotsmen. eat deep-fried pizza in Scotland) and so when the waiter asked my pleasure, I, too, ordered sweetbreads, thus letting my lunch companions know that this Yank, at least, remained unmoved by their Neanderthal propensities and was as bloodthirsty as even the most literate of Scotsmen.

It's not just paranoid writers who are p.r.o.ne to such overreaction. My stereotyping of the raw beefeating editor as a dangerous opponent, for example, is typical. Many people say they avoid rare or raw meat because they are uncomfortable with the violent emotions it arouses; one can almost hear the nineteenth-century condemnation of the barbaric behavior of "bleeding dish nations" in the sentiment. In fact, the food taboos and their attendant att.i.tudes that are the subject of this book continue to permeate almost every aspect of our lives. People seem to still think you are, literally, what you eat. In one 1989 study, college students who believed a certain person ate pork invariably attributed piglike characteristics to that person. When told the same person ate only chicken, those "piglike" traits were immediately replaced with chickenish ones. This has interesting implications, because we are constantly picking up information about one another's eating habits via body odors that are perceived on a subconscious level. So the characteristics we attribute to certain foods-att.i.tudes formed from beliefs that go back centuries-flavor all our social interactions, from work, to romance, to whom we move away from on the bus. For instance, when we sit next to someone eating or smelling of potato chips, studies indicate we immediately cla.s.sify that person as lazy and immoral, the same belief about the potato that led the English to denounce the root in the eighteenth century. People say they eschew garlic because of its strong odor, but it was only a century ago when American newspapers featured editorials condemning garlic eaters as "moral degenerates," a pretty clear indication that this att.i.tude has its roots in something deeper than odor.

How deep our feelings on sin and food run is most clearly ill.u.s.trated today by att.i.tudes toward certain intoxicants. It's a complicated issue, but what binds these two situations together is the subliminal belief that what you take into your body has the ability to radically transform; you are what you eat, the reasoning goes, so you are what you smoke/snort/shoot. This is arguably more rational when discussing psychoactive substances, as opposed to food, but a look at the history of chocolate and cocaine shows how porous that border can be. The American government is currently using a dangerous kind of chemical weaponry to eliminate the coca plant-the source of cocaine-because we consider it to be a dangerous drug; the people of the Andes, however, consider coca to be a food and its leaves, chewed, provide essential nutrients in their traditional diet. Likewise, although we now consider chocolate to be a food, when it first came to Europe it was thought to be a powerful intoxicant. Eighteenth-century Europeans believed chocolate transformed women into s.e.x-hungry wh.o.r.es; the popular image of cocaine/crack as a substance that transforms female users into animal-like prost.i.tutes is remarkably similar. In fact, the 1990s hysteria over deformed "crack babies" (now largely discredited) had a parallel hysteria among the eighteenth-century French who banned chocolate over "cocoa babies," which they believed were being born pitch black as a result of their mothers' hot chocolate habit (this theory, too, has been discredited). The fact that both ages allowed the devastation wreaked by alcohol to continue suggests that social and health concerns were not the real reasons for these taboos, but rather that they are/were both motivated by a desire to keep un-Christian/foreign substances out of the social body. Otherwise, wouldn't we today be spraying poison on the brandy-producing vineyards of Europe, and not just on the coca fields of Colombia? It's perhaps telling that the first Western war against the coca plant was waged by Spanish missionaries who attempted to eradicate it (along with guinea pigs) in the 1600s because they considered both sacred to Satan.

So perhaps Westerners shouldn't be patting themselves on the back just yet for their rational att.i.tudes about what people put in their bodies. Yet, it is true that almost all of the foods once forbidden are now allowed, and that absolute dietary taboos are now a thing of the past in mainstream society. The question is whether this new freedom has left us better off. There's certainly no doubt that Westerners enjoy a richer and more varied diet now than at any point in history. Yet, many people report that they find eating less satisfying than ever. Cultural historian Piero Camporesi attributes this dissatisfaction to a "profound disruption with the past," and compares the abandonment of food taboos to our discarding of s.e.xual mores in the late-1900s. He believes that these changes have eviscerated the meaning of both s.e.x and eating, and have produced a tendency to indulge in shallow and meaningless pleasure that leads to a kind of moral decay. It's an interesting comparison; s.e.x and food are our two most basic drives and there's a long tradition tying the family unit to both s.e.x and communal meals. There's certainly no denying that, as meals lose social and spiritual meaning, we spend less time eating together, or that as the communal family meal withers, so do our table manners and the general level of civility, leading to the creation of the current fast-food hamburger culture, in which everything is immediate, rude, meaningless, and disposable.

The point is that these archaic food taboos and rules, however preposterous and evil they may have at times been, also deepened our lives by imbuing our most common social gathering with meaning. Dinner gave us not just physical nutrition but spiritual nutrition as well. The laws governing what we ate also gave a sensory dimension to our sense of culture and time; one could tell the day by the smells of the special foods being cooked, which, in turn, led to unconscious meditations on the religious holiday being celebrated and its corresponding moral message. These aromatic links to liturgical time, in turn, bound us to the eternal cycles of spring and fall, winter and summer, life and death; it's no coincidence that the month of dietary restrictions that marks the Christian fast of Lent occurs in the last barren months of winter, or that its ending with the feast of Easter-celebrating Christ's resurrection from death-coincides with the first days of spring, when life returns to Earth's fields. The food laws of holidays like Easter or Ramadan were a crucial part of a multisensory celebration of nature, religion, and morality that marked the cycle of rebirth; they also reminded us that there is a naturally fallow season innate to life, a lesson often forgotten in our new artificial Eden, where all pleasures are always available, if perhaps too often plastic-wrapped and lacking true savor.

It almost makes the notion of returning to the traditional canon of food laws attractive. A ridiculous idea, of course, for every age will develop its own taboos and rituals to give meaning to the fulfillment of our most basic need. But we might want to hesitate before so blithely discarding the ones we've taken millenniums to produce. And we should perhaps pause for a moment before creating new rules, because what we outlaw reveals not only our society's priorities, it also shapes them by giving the avant-garde from Eve onward a wall over which to jump. The urge to break the rules is, after all, the most human of pleasures.

Acknowledgments.

I first want to thank my editor at Ballantine, Dan Smetanka, for all his insight and patience, and Jennifer Hengen and Neeti Madan at Sterling Lord Literistic. Grovels to Jeff "Left Jones" Harris for his devoted research into the nature of absinthe. Special grat.i.tude to everyone who contributed recipes to the book-their names are mentioned in the relevant sections-and those scholars who have become specialists in a variety of fields, in particular Stanley Kaplan, Frederic Simoons, the writers at Pet.i.t Propos Culinaire Pet.i.t Propos Culinaire , Piero Camporesi, and many others, without whose work researching a book like this would have been pure h.e.l.l. I'm sure at times I've misunderstood their thoughts, and I apologize in advance. All mistakes are mine. A variety of people were helpful in many ways, including David Lindsey, Zarela Martinez, Jerry Feldman, Jean-Louis Palladin, Michael Ginor, Robert Darnton, Zata Vickers, David Kileast, George Faison, Christene Gabriele, John Surinde, Bill Hudders, John the rickshaw driver, Annabel Bentley, Andy Toma.s.si, Troy and Paula Allen (not to mention Jackson), Pio, the staff at New York's Veselka Restaurant and at Williamsburg's Girdle Factory. Particular thanks to Allison d.i.c.kens for her forbearance. My especial grat.i.tude to the staffs of the following inst.i.tutions: the British National Library in London, the Indian National Library in Calcutta, the private Buddhist library in Dharamsala, London's Guild Library, Columbia University, New York University, the French National Archives, the archives of the , Piero Camporesi, and many others, without whose work researching a book like this would have been pure h.e.l.l. I'm sure at times I've misunderstood their thoughts, and I apologize in advance. All mistakes are mine. A variety of people were helpful in many ways, including David Lindsey, Zarela Martinez, Jerry Feldman, Jean-Louis Palladin, Michael Ginor, Robert Darnton, Zata Vickers, David Kileast, George Faison, Christene Gabriele, John Surinde, Bill Hudders, John the rickshaw driver, Annabel Bentley, Andy Toma.s.si, Troy and Paula Allen (not to mention Jackson), Pio, the staff at New York's Veselka Restaurant and at Williamsburg's Girdle Factory. Particular thanks to Allison d.i.c.kens for her forbearance. My especial grat.i.tude to the staffs of the following inst.i.tutions: the British National Library in London, the Indian National Library in Calcutta, the private Buddhist library in Dharamsala, London's Guild Library, Columbia University, New York University, the French National Archives, the archives of the Mairie Mairie of Paris, and various Peruvian witchdoctors. I owe a special debt to the staff at the Humanities Library in Manhattan, one of the most efficient gulags I've had the pleasure to encounter. Bittersweet thanks (and condolences) to the staff at the new French National Library-may the architect responsible for that edifice from h.e.l.l be consigned to a special purgatory reserved for those who put ego before function. I suppose the "will call" section of his library would do in a pinch. of Paris, and various Peruvian witchdoctors. I owe a special debt to the staff at the Humanities Library in Manhattan, one of the most efficient gulags I've had the pleasure to encounter. Bittersweet thanks (and condolences) to the staff at the new French National Library-may the architect responsible for that edifice from h.e.l.l be consigned to a special purgatory reserved for those who put ego before function. I suppose the "will call" section of his library would do in a pinch.

But above all, my deepest thanks and buckets of love to Nina J., toast-eater and literary wunderkind wunderkind, who made this book so much better than I ever could have.

END NOTES.

l.u.s.t FIRST BITE.

The debate over the precise ident.i.ty of the Bible's Forbidden Fruit will never end. It seems fair to say, however, that the Latin of northern Europe, where Celtic civilizations were largely centered, used the word pomum pomum to mean apple, while the Latin of Southern Europe used it to mean fruit. Avitus (full name Alcimus Ecdicius Avitus) was a prominent member of the Burgundy Church in Gaul located roughly five hundred miles from the former Celtic capitol at Aix-en-Provence. He uses two words in his poem: to mean apple, while the Latin of Southern Europe used it to mean fruit. Avitus (full name Alcimus Ecdicius Avitus) was a prominent member of the Burgundy Church in Gaul located roughly five hundred miles from the former Celtic capitol at Aix-en-Provence. He uses two words in his poem: fructus fructus (fruit), seemingly for the general abundance of the Garden, and (fruit), seemingly for the general abundance of the Garden, and pomum pomum, for the specific fruit Eve eats. Most translators have determined the latter to mean the fruit we know as the apple. The version I referred to was in Avitus' The Fall of Man The Fall of Man, edited and translated by Daniel J. Nodes, who used a ninth-century edition thought to be one of the earliest extant copies. The poem's text is given in both English and Latin. The conflict between the Romans and Celts, however, predates Christianity. In the first century A.D. Emperor Claudius outlawed all aspects of Celtic religion as "anti-Roman," and as recently as a few centuries ago Northern Protestants, a group that grew out of the Celtic Church, were still calling the Catholic grape "corrupt" as compared to their "temperate" apple (the controversy appears to have had something to do with the different fruits' methods of reproduction). The cla.s.sifying of the apple as an aphrodisiac was universal but it appeared to be particularly popular in the Latin countries, where seventeenth-century priests like Juan Ludovico de la Cerda wrote "the apple to be under the jurisdiction of Venus," while Daldanius said to dream of them "foretold of venereal fruits." There's a host of folktales characterizing them as love charms.

The details on the Spanish alterations of the Aztec flower myths come from "L'Arbre interdit du Paradis Azteque" "L'Arbre interdit du Paradis Azteque" and "Myths of Paradise Lost," by Michael Graulich, in and "Myths of Paradise Lost," by Michael Graulich, in Revue de l'histoire des religions Revue de l'histoire des religions and and Current Anthropology Current Anthropology, respectively. He attributes the information on the Catholic appropriation to Codex Codex Telleriano-Remensis Telleriano-Remensis and and Vatica.n.u.s Vatica.n.u.s, which is identified by a commenting scholar as "intended to be tools in the hands of missionaries." The anecdote of the Mayans blaming the loss of their flowered drinks for their societal despair is mentioned in Sophie Coe's First American Cuisine First American Cuisine. Whether or not the drinks contained an actual flower is not quite clear; scholars like Gordon Wa.s.son have suggested it was peyote or a similar psychoactive plant. Other accounts identify the drink as being honey mead, called balche balche, that was infused with leaves or bark from a tree that was supposedly exterminated by the Spanish.

The tale of the Celtic apple "crucified" on a Christian tree comes from "The Apple Mystery in Arthurian Romance" by Jessie L. Weston, in which she describes a curious allegory in the Arthurian mythos called Le Pelerinage de l'ame Le Pelerinage de l'ame. It consists of a dialog about a wild (Celtic) apple that will produce only bitter fruit until it is grafted onto a desiccated tree that she identifies as representing Christianity. The ill.u.s.tration shows Christ nailed to a tree and covered in foliage. "Why should the redeemer of the world be represented under the form of an apple?" she writes. "Unless I am very much mistaken we are here dealing with an attempt on the part of the church to Christianize an already existing pagan ritual." The ma.n.u.script dates from the eleventh century, but the tale appears to be much older and probably accounts for a curious series of religious paintings showing the baby Christ with an apple in his hand, which he appears to be offering to the viewer.

Some of the Celt's sacred apple groves were located near Carlisle, which the Romans called Aballaba Aballaba for its revered apple orchards. Many of these sacred Druid groves inspired Christian saints with names like Our Lady of the Pines. for its revered apple orchards. Many of these sacred Druid groves inspired Christian saints with names like Our Lady of the Pines.

LOVE APPLE.

The etymology of the tomato's name is rather confusing. Tomato derives from the Aztec xitomatl xitomatl, but the Italian name of pommo d'oro pommo d'oro (golden apple) has been attributed to a misunderstanding of (golden apple) has been attributed to a misunderstanding of pommo di moor pommo di moor (the Moor's apple), (the Moor's apple), pommo di morti pommo di morti (apple of death) and (apple of death) and pommo di amour pommo di amour (love apple). The reference to the mandrake root and broomsticks relates to an unguent made of mandrake, belladonna, and baby fat which was rubbed on brooms that were inserted into the v.a.g.i.n.a, thus allowing the substance to be absorbed into the bloodstream. Other mandrake relatives were also notorious as glorifiers of fleshly pleasures, particularly the belladonna that Italian (love apple). The reference to the mandrake root and broomsticks relates to an unguent made of mandrake, belladonna, and baby fat which was rubbed on brooms that were inserted into the v.a.g.i.n.a, thus allowing the substance to be absorbed into the bloodstream. Other mandrake relatives were also notorious as glorifiers of fleshly pleasures, particularly the belladonna that Italian contessas contessas used as an eyedrop in order to dilate their pupils and give them an unnatural beauty. In addition to the stream of tales connecting the tomato to Eden, there is lots of interesting art that underscores that belief. The popular plant guide used as an eyedrop in order to dilate their pupils and give them an unnatural beauty. In addition to the stream of tales connecting the tomato to Eden, there is lots of interesting art that underscores that belief. The popular plant guide Paradisi in sole Paradisi in sole, from 1625, shows Adam and Eve romping about under pineapple trees. Eve is shown picking a vegetable off a low-lying bush that appears to be a member of the nightshade family, although it's impossible to say if it's a tomato. The seventeenth century painter Isakk Van Oosten was famous for putting guinea pigs from South America in his painting of the Garden of Eden. The popular fifth-century bestiary Physiologus naturalis Physiologus naturalis, details how two elephants representing Adam and Eve were ejected from Paradise after eating fruits identified as "love apples," meaning mandrakes. Although there are reports of Italians in the 1600s eating fried tomatoes, this was probably a reference to green tomatoes and was not the norm, according to Camporesi's The Magic The Magic Harvest Harvest, which mentions that the 1890 edition of Rei de cuoci Rei de cuoci calls tomato coulis only a garnish. It also contains the full quote of the Italian prelate Giovani Battista Occhiolini urging the Vatican's Prefect of Public Order in 1784 to promote potato eating. The list of disapproved foods by Abbot Chiari is in his book calls tomato coulis only a garnish. It also contains the full quote of the Italian prelate Giovani Battista Occhiolini urging the Vatican's Prefect of Public Order in 1784 to promote potato eating. The list of disapproved foods by Abbot Chiari is in his book Lettere scelte di varie materie pieacvolie, 1752 Lettere scelte di varie materie pieacvolie, 1752; he calls them "drugs," i.e., spices, and it seems to have been a reference to the growing use of tomato sauce at that time. The sad tale of the fork-loving princessa princessa can be found in Norbert's can be found in Norbert's The Civilizing The Civilizing Process Process.

VENOMOUS GREEN.

Frederic Simmons reports that one twentieth-century census indicated that thousands of people in northern India still consider the plant tulsi tulsi their primary religion. There's a curious coda to Vrinda's tale. On the twelfth day of the bright moon of Kartk, Hindus celebrate how Vrinda, reincarnated as Rukmini, married Krishna, who was an avatar of Vishnu, the G.o.d who helped murder Vrinda's husband by seducing her. It's all very confusing and appropriately celebrated by smearing cow dung on the basil pot. their primary religion. There's a curious coda to Vrinda's tale. On the twelfth day of the bright moon of Kartk, Hindus celebrate how Vrinda, reincarnated as Rukmini, married Krishna, who was an avatar of Vishnu, the G.o.d who helped murder Vrinda's husband by seducing her. It's all very confusing and appropriately celebrated by smearing cow dung on the basil pot.

THE KING'S CHOCOLATE The name Theobroma Theobroma (food of the G.o.ds) is the genus cla.s.sification a.s.signed to cacao when it arrived in Europe during the 1500s; whether it was an appellation of approbation or a reference to Aztec beliefs is not clear. Most of the details on the early American use of chocolate come from Sophie Coe's (food of the G.o.ds) is the genus cla.s.sification a.s.signed to cacao when it arrived in Europe during the 1500s; whether it was an appellation of approbation or a reference to Aztec beliefs is not clear. Most of the details on the early American use of chocolate come from Sophie Coe's The The True History of Chocolate True History of Chocolate and Gordon Wa.s.son's and Gordon Wa.s.son's Wondrous Mushrooms Wondrous Mushrooms. The chocolate/Lent controversy was finally settled by ruling that chocolate made with water, but not milk, was permissible while fasting. The story of the Queen of France being banned from drinking chocolate in public comes from the Memoires de la d.u.c.h.esse de Montpensier Memoires de la d.u.c.h.esse de Montpensier as mentioned in LeGrand, who expresses doubt about the anecdote. as mentioned in LeGrand, who expresses doubt about the anecdote.

In his a.n.a.lysis of chocolate's relations.h.i.+p to the aristocracy, Wolfgang Schivelbush points out that with the fall of the ancien regime, chocolate as a morning beverage ceased except for its use among children, often the place where outmoded and discarded customs like fairy tales end up. French social philosopher Roland Barthes coined the phrase "Sadean chocolate," which he explains as a personification of the de Sade aesthetic involving "abundant, delicate soft food . . . to restore, to poison, to fatten, to evacuate; everything planned in relation to vice." Sophie Coe was the first to speculate that the Europeans stopped calling chocolate cacao (from the Mayan ka-ka-w ka-ka-w) because of its similarity to the slang for excrement. The speculation that the references to chocolate and Madame du Barry imply some kind of a.n.a.l s.e.x originates in my perverted little mind alone. Robert Darnton, probably the leading authority on French libelles libelles, told me he is skeptical of the idea, but it's worth noting a.n.a.l s.e.x is still sometimes referred to as "fudge packing."

GAY GOURMAND.

The taboos on hyenas, rabbits, etc., are in the Epistle of Barnabas Epistle of Barnabas , part of the apocrypha material deleted from the Bible. Various details on American taboos come from Laura Shapiro's , part of the apocrypha material deleted from the Bible. Various details on American taboos come from Laura Shapiro's Perfection Salad Perfection Salad. The quotes in the discussion of f.e.l.l.a.t.i.o among the Sambia come from Robert Stoller and Gilbert Herdt's "The Development of Masculinity," in the Journal of the American Journal of the American Psychoa.n.a.lytic a.s.sociation Psychoa.n.a.lytic a.s.sociation. Not everyone is so s.e.xually insecure about dinner. The Hua men of New Guinea say women's food is soft, disgusting, wretched, revolting. But they gobble it up when no one is looking-it's the only way to get her secret powers.

BEIJING LIBIDO.

This is, of course, only a partial list of aphrodisiacs. Apparently the rhino's p.e.n.i.s, not its horn, was originally considered the aphrodisiac. To be fair, consumption of both rhino horns and tiger penes for medical purposes was declared illegal by the State Council of the People's Republic of China in May 1993. The law appears to have enjoyed limited enforcement.

THE RAINBOW EGG.

The South Carolina study is cited in Simoons's Eat Not This Eat Not This Flesh Flesh. It's intriguing to speculate what role these African beliefs, transmitted via slavery, may have played in America's un-Euro aversion to wet omelets. Langercrantz, however, suggests that texture plays a significant role in these taboos and notes that many Central Africans with egg taboos will sometimes eat them if they are very, very well cooked; while wetter eggs remain beyond the pale. While the idea that the Rainbow Egg refers to the arch of the rainbow is entirely mine, it seems borne out by other references in Aboriginal myths to world-creating Double Rainbow Eggs. The translation for the Orphic poem comes from Newall.

Gluttony PORCUS TROIANU.

The adaptation of Ovis Apalis (Eggs in Pinenut Sauce) comes from Ilaria Gozzini Giacosa's A Taste of Ancient Rome A Taste of Ancient Rome, with permission.

c.o.c.kTAILS WITH THE DEVIL.

The foodies in the Irish Vision of Merlino Vision of Merlino moan, "In recompense for the food we refused not/and the evil of our not keeping the fasts/great hunger and this/is ever on us to our consuming." The Islamic sunken garden referred to in the text still exists in Seville. The numerological breakdown of the garden comes from al-Haythami's moan, "In recompense for the food we refused not/and the evil of our not keeping the fasts/great hunger and this/is ever on us to our consuming." The Islamic sunken garden referred to in the text still exists in Seville. The numerological breakdown of the garden comes from al-Haythami's Majia al-zawa'id Majia al-zawa'id, which also stipulates that every man's s.e.xual stamina shall be increased one hundredfold. Although he does not mention how this was to be achieved, one presumes that chickpeas were well represented among Heaven's forty-nine hundred courses; the legumes were considered so rousing that merely drinking their cooking water was said to give the imbiber the power to "deflower 72 virgin goats." The comments on bodily waste in Paradise have been attributed to Sahih Muslim Book 39 Sahih Muslim Book 39, #6798 by Jabir ibn Abdulla, who states, "I heard Allah's Apostle as saying that the inmates of Paradise would eat and drink but would neither spit, nor pa.s.s water, nor void excrement, nor suffer catarrh. It was said: Then, what would happen with food? Thereupon he said: They would belch and sweat (and it would be over with their food), and their sweat would be that of musk and they would glorify and praise Allah as easily as you breathe." The details on heavenly s.e.xual provender come from Koranic verses 76:19 and 37:40. Presumably female faithful suffer similar rewards, although the Koran states only that Allah will also provide "boys of perpetual freshness" to the blessed in Heaven. Whose pleasure they are intended to fulfill-male or female-is unclear. The poems cited appear in Jan van Gelder's excellent study of Arabic food imagery, Of Dishes and Discourse Of Dishes and Discourse, and A. J. Arberry's Islamic Culture Islamic Culture. For the record, the most temperate Paradise I've b.u.mped into is the Buddhist Tavatimsa Tavatimsa, which seems to consist only of silver-colored streams and psychedelic lotus blossoms.

THE SULTAN'S DATE Waines's book (published by Riad El-Rayyes in Lebanon) recommends simply mixing equal parts sugar and powdered cinnamon, which is fine but not quite the same as the original, which called for flavoring the sugar with musk, camphor, and hyacinth. Admittedly, some of these ingredients are extinct, but there are interesting subst.i.tutes. The first step is to replace hyacinth with violets.

Violet-scented sugar: Carefully wash and dry 1 12 cup violets (do not use pink or white) and partially pulverize in mortar or processor. Mix with equal amount superfine (castor) sugar and spread on foil-lined tray and dry for one hour at 50 C. Cool.Musk: This can be replaced with ambrette ambrette seeds ( seeds (Abelmoschus moschatus), which are available from various herbal stores.Camphor: The easiest replacement is cinnamon. Alternately, there's so-called edible camphor, still used in Bengali sweets and called kacha karpoor kacha karpoor. You should add approximately the amount that would cover the tip of a pin. Do not use camphor oil or inedible synthetic camphor. Most forms of camphor are inedible and should not be eaten under any circ.u.mstances.

One source of fresh dates is Western Date Ranches in Yuma, AZ (520-726-7006).

ANGEL FOOD CAKE.

Medieval speculation about angels' appet.i.tes grew so intense that the Vatican finally ruled that they neither ate nor fornicated and were genderless. There are actually a variety of foods called manna, such as a quasi honey that drips off the desert tamarisk trees and that is made into a kind of halvah halvah around Turkey. Another manna is used in making the laxative mannitol. The lichen manna, however, is thought to be the likeliest source of the biblical chow because of the reference to it falling from the skies. around Turkey. Another manna is used in making the laxative mannitol. The lichen manna, however, is thought to be the likeliest source of the biblical chow because of the reference to it falling from the skies.

SAINTS AND SUPERMODELS.

While there were a number of centuries separating Jerome (who was reputed to be something of a gourmet) and the super-slim saints of the late medieval period, many of their diaries seem highly influenced by his teaching. Angela of Foligno, for example, said she starved for years to cool her "hot little body," and when that failed literally burned herself to extinguish the internal "heat" of l.u.s.t. Interestingly, the dieting diaries of some of the saints seem as image conscious as the ones given out by celebrities; the famous St. Catherine of Siena b.u.t.tressed her fasting by "devoutly receiving Holy Communion very frequently indeed," according to her confessor. The statistics from America's Psychology Today Psychology Today are similar to numbers for Europe that indicate in countries like Britain about 15 percent of all teenage girls will eat only one meal a day in order to keep their weight down. Roughly a quarter of all models qualify as anorexic, according to federal health guidelines. Girls are twenty times more likely to suffer anorexia than boys, and approximately 10 percent of those afflicted die from the condition. For information and on-line counseling visit are similar to numbers for Europe that indicate in countries like Britain about 15 percent of all teenage girls will eat only one meal a day in order to keep their weight down. Roughly a quarter of all models qualify as anorexic, according to federal health guidelines. Girls are twenty times more likely to suffer anorexia than boys, and approximately 10 percent of those afflicted die from the condition. For information and on-line counseling visit www.edauk.com.

THE JOY OF FAT.

It wasn't just fat that people loved in Trusler's time. Anything quivery and squirty seemed appealing, including an eyeball, "which is to be cut from its socket by forcing the point of the carving knife down to the bottom," and the sweet tooth "being full of jelly." Fletcherism, which entails chewing every morsel approximately thirty times, was discovered in 1898 by Horace Fletcher, a.k.a. "the Great Masticator." It's said to be quite an effective way to lose weight. The Mayans' reservations on basting are mentioned in Coe, who sources it to Cronicas de Cronicas de Michoacan Michoacan, edited by Gomez de Orozco.

MITTERRAND'S LAST SUPPER The idea of covering one's head while feasting has a curious parallel among the Gurage people of Southwest Ethiopia. When a man there loses his appet.i.te, he is thought to be possessed, the only cure for which is for him to cover his head and eat ma.s.sive amounts of food, shoving it in as quickly as he can. Some of these snacks go for up to twelve hours, or until he finally says, "Tafwahum," "Tafwahum," "I am satisfied." "I am satisfied."

Pride THE EGOTIST AT DINNER.

The patriotic ode to sauerkraut comes from the 1935 cookbook Deutsch Heimatkuche (German Homeland Cooking) Deutsch Heimatkuche (German Homeland Cooking) as translated by Bertram M. Bordon. as translated by Bertram M. Bordon.

THE DIRT EATERS.

Dirt eating, known as geophagy, is a commercial enterprise in parts of the southern United States, where small bags of kaolin can be found in supermarkets for about $1.50 a shot. Longstreet's imputation of a characteristic a.s.sociated with Africans to the white Ransy Sniffle is merely one quirk in the curious social relations.h.i.+p between poor southern whites and blacks. In one school of thought, the so-called "white trash" (defined as a group of permanently unemployed Caucasian individuals specializing in incest and drunkenness) are a kind of "anti-aristocracy" created by the freeing of African slaves. The idea is that poor, unskilled whites in the color-obsessed American South could not engage in simple manual work because it was "colored folks' work" and for them to do so would entail losing social/racial rank. So they became versions of European aristocrats, who also often went penniless rather than lose caste by engaging in productive labor. Many of the "Euro trash" resolved their dilemma by marrying wealthy American heiresses interested in an Old World t.i.tle. Mr. Sniffle and company merely created the Ku Klux Klan.

A DINNER PARTY IN KISHAN GARHI.

The detailed a.n.a.lysis of the goings-on in Kishan Garhi is drawn from Mckin Marriott's "Caste Ranking and Food Transactions: A Matrix a.n.a.lysis," in Structure and Change in Indian Society Structure and Change in Indian Society . The suggestion of cow dung place mats is credited to tenth-century writer al-Biruni in Mahedra Singh's . The suggestion of cow dung place mats is credited to tenth-century writer al-Biruni in Mahedra Singh's Life in Ancient India Life in Ancient India, which quotes al-Biruni as saying, "they prepared a separate table-cloth for each person by pouring water over a spot and plastering it with the dung of the cow . . ."

The Azande people of Sudan provide a much more congenial explanation for these taboos on communal dining. According to them, a feud between two gentlemen named Yapu-tapu and Nagilinugo over who got to have a hen with their porridge led to King Gbudue ruling that henceforth different groups should eat out of one another's sight in order to prevent unnecessary jealousy.

HUMBLE PIE.

The connection between chicken liver pate and Etruscan divination comes from Giuseppe Alessi, author of Etruschi: Il Mito a Etruschi: Il Mito a Tavola (The Etruscans: The Myth at the Dinner Table). Tavola (The Etruscans: The Myth at the Dinner Table). Alessi's book is available only in Italian, but you can try his re-creations of ancient Tuscan cuisine at his Florence restaurant, Pentola dell'Oro. Alessi's book is available only in Italian, but you can try his re-creations of ancient Tuscan cuisine at his Florence restaurant, Pentola dell'Oro.

IMPURE INDIAN CORN AND AND THE b.u.t.tERFLY PEOPLE THE b.u.t.tERFLY PEOPLE.

The first cookbook to include a corn recipe was American American Cookery Cookery by Amelia Simmons, circa 1796, according to Tannahill. Prior to that date, American cuisine was considered undeserving of the printed page. The reference to corn being "the food of the servants" has been attributed to "Report of the Journey of Francis Louis Michel from Berne, 1701." Corn's despised status was so well known that Tom Sawyer even remarked on it in Mark Twain's cla.s.sic. White America's intentions toward the buffalo were made relatively clear by General Philip Sheridan, who told the Texas Legislature in the mid-1800s, "let the hunters kill and skin and sell until the buffalo is exterminated, as it is the only way to bring about lasting peace." Buffalo Bill, hired by the railroads to help exterminate the animals that were blocking their lines, once bragged he killed four thousand in twelve months and left the bodies to rot. by Amelia Simmons, circa 1796, according to Tannahill. Prior to that date, American cuisine was considered undeserving of the printed page. The reference to corn being "the food of the servants" has been attributed to "Report of the Journey of Francis Louis Michel from Berne, 1701." Corn's despised status was so well known that Tom Sawyer even remarked on it in Mark Twain's cla.s.sic. White America's intentions toward the buffalo were made relatively clear by General Philip Sheridan, who told the Texas Legislature in the mid-1800s, "let the hunters kill and skin and sell until the buffalo is exterminated, as it is the only way to bring about lasting peace." Buffalo Bill, hired by the railroads to help exterminate the animals that were blocking their lines, once bragged he killed four thousand in twelve months and left the bodies to rot.

There's actually no direct record of whether Native Americans were aware of the nutritional significance of nixtamalization but they seem to have had an inkling because they reserved non-nixtamalized bread for holidays when they did not eat other dietary essentials like salt and chili peppers. Corn's "murder trial" is mentioned in Daphne Roe, who credits it to Ebbie Watson, Commissioner of the Department of Agriculture in South Carolina. In the early 1900s, approximately nine thousand Americans a year were dying from pellagra. Although foreign foods and alcohol are one of the main health problems among native people in the Southwest, it's thought that the introduction of sweeter hybrid corns about forty years ago has really made the diabetes rate jump. In addition to the corn's higher sugar content, the sugar is also fast-releasing, rendering it doubly difficult to digest for some. Details about corn's cultural importance to the Hopi come from Fussell's work.

GHOST AT THE DINNER TABLE!.

Whether or not our feelings about flatulence have ties to the Pythagorean theorem is difficult to say. The West's aversion to pa.s.sing gas certainly diminished after the Cla.s.sic civilizations fell apart-at least judging by

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