Garden Of Love 67 I'll Handle It.

"No, I'm not." She said with a serious expression.

She try very hard to keep her face like this, right now.

Alan's eyes start to redden.

"No, I don't believe that."

"Just go Alan. I will never love you. You're not Sam, Alan. I've mistaken you as him when you were around. Now, I realize that you are not him. And you will never be like him. I can't love you." She distance herself a bit from him.

"Hazel..i..i don't mind if you mistaken me as him…I.."

"But I mind Alan!"

"You like reopening my wound again. You will never be the cure. Please..leave me." she turn her body around. Bit her bottom of lips hard, making sure she's not sobbing in front of him.

Alan turn silent. He wipe his corner of his eyes. "Do you hate me that much?" his voice sound a bit raspy.

She nod without even look back at him.

"Do you really not have any feeling to me? Not a single tiny piece of it?" he ask again.

Hazel nod again.

Stand up, he walk closer to her back. He take a deep breath before he release it.

"If that the case.." he put her long hair to the side and bent his body a little.

He hug her gently and kiss on top of her shoulder. "I will always love you Hazel. Always." He whisper before he let go of her and walk out from her office.

His eyes already bloodshot when he left the room.

...

After a minute Alan walk out from her room, she flopped down to the floor.

She start sobbing and hiccup.

"Erghh..thi..this..is too much..hic.." she wipe her tears using both of her palm.

No matter how many times she wipe her tears won't stop.

She continue to cry until it was late at night.

Chase open her office door. The room was dark and only dimmed by the outside lamp.

"Hazel…"

"Go away Chase. I need my time alone." She curled up on the couch hiding her face.

"He's left a long time ago. Isn't this is what you want?"

".."

"I don't know that you can be this stupid. Really, I thought you were smart enough. He love you Hazel. What else do you want from him? He give his best to you and Aslan. Do you think you can find someone like him? You must be really stupid, Hazel." He let out his anger to her before he close the door after that.

"Yeah..i am stupid." She mumble.

'I can't even compare to his ex-girlfriend. Well, at least I know he will have a better love life with that rich lady or whatever her name is.'

Joe knock on her gla.s.s door.

The same thing happen just like Chase do earlier. Nagging her being so stupid, let them lose a brother, a chef and so on.

After done nagging session with the men in the house, Akiko and Lola come to comfort her the next five days.

"Hazel, what happen actually when you guys in QingLong? Why it's happen to be this way?" Akiko ask while Lola sit still beside her on the bed.

"He's someone who is not in my league." She stare at the bed sheet blankly.

"Not in your league? Hazel, do you realize that you held a Jokovic name in behind the word of 'Hazel'? You is the 'Lady Hazel'. Which part of you is not in a same league as him? Is he a beggar? Homeless? a drug addict?" Lola pinch her s.p.a.ce between her eyebrows.

"He..very loyal to her. I couldn't even compare to her."

"Her? Who is she?"

"His Master. The woman he bring home last time."

"Argh..this is so weird. Hazel, please speak in English, will you?" Lola lay on her bed hugging her big bear on her arm.

"Before he lost his memory, he made a promise to her, that he will be her s.h.i.+eld and sword, protecting her life and will always stay by her side. When he lost his memory, he made a promise to my father that he will marry me. Tell me, how could he choose? I just a woman with a child. While she…she so beautiful, beyond G.o.ddess. I feel so tiny, and yeah..I saw them kissing on the day before I returned back. I even heard their conversation and how she begging him to stay with her again. I just…I can't…he's too good to be with me.." her tears start to form again.

"Isn't that's mean you love him Hazel. Don't you realized it yet?" Akiko rub her back try to comfort her.

"I..I don't know, I forgotten how to be in love.." she wipe her tears.

"Hmm.. how about you find him and talk this again with him. After all, its you who ask him to leave. He choose you, but you refuse." Lola sit up and look at Hazel.

"I can't…like I said, what will happen to his ex-girlfriend? He promise her."

"But, he doesn't promise to marry her right? It's you who he promise to married to." Lola said again.

"I…"

"Look, this is just my observation with your situation right now. You just decide based on what you saw and heard. But did you ever try to listen and talk with him about this? Have you ever consider his feeling? His decision? What if, he is not in relations.h.i.+p with her? What if, it's all just misunderstanding? Don't you think you're being selfish? You think you do this for him, but what if you wrong? Think about it, Hazel. You're so lucky to have someone who love you like he do, and yet you keep push him away. I really don't get it. Just so you know, dead person can't give you anymore reason to wait for. Move on!" she stand up and leaving her with Akiko.

Akiko in the middle of guilty. She agree with Lola's but she also feel sorry for Hazel.

At last, she just silent and comfort Hazel before she left her room.

..

"Andy..it's been five days..let's return back home okay?" she said softly to him who look lifeless at the rattan chair.

They still in Moon city. He refused to returned back to Imperial city. Seeing him still not giving his answer, she sigh and walk back to her room.

Just when she want to make a call, her phone ringing. She immediately pick up her call.

"Baby.."

"Darling..where are you right now?" a man voice ask her with a concern.

"I'm at Arendell, Moon city. Baby…I think I just caused a trouble." she said with a sad voice to him.

"Mhm? What problem?"

Hai Rin told him the whole story from the beginning until the end and he listen to her with a patient.

"So, when I want to bring him back..he seem..so sad..I don't know what should I do.."

"Honey, the way you care about him, the way you treat him will lead people to have misunderstanding between you two. I know you really care about him, but be careful in the future, okay?" he comforting her.

"So, what should I do now?"

"It's okay. I'll handle it."