VESSEL - LightNovelsOnl.com
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Where am I? ... "Jelly is good" seems to be the only thing I can remember.
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This inexplicit feeling of understanding everything, where did it come from? I can't remember anything but it feels like a natural reaction to question everything. Is that what I truly think or are these someone else's thoughts? Especially since it doesn't seem like I have a total amnesia as I can still remember "Jelly is good". Jelly would then have to either be someone really important to me or someone who's supposed to protect me. Since it's the only thing I can remember, I'll ignore the second possibility for now and a.s.sume that it is someone really important. Is Jelly a part of my direct family or a sworn brother? A lover or wife? Maybe even my child. The possibilities are endless and I desperately need more information about my current circ.u.mstances. I have this inexplainable feeling that as soon as I stop thinking and concentrating, I will disappear. I will prevent that at all costs.
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Seems like my attempts might just end up futile. I've been here so long that can't think of anything else to think about. Just the aspect of I can't think of anything anymore, has been covered at least thousands of times. By this time I have accepted my fate of disappearing as there is a slight chance to change my circ.u.mstances. I might end up in heaven, maybe even join the samsara cycle and be reborn stronger. However there would then also be a chance of being reborn as a puny lifeform lika an ant. Slaving away for a lifetime manipulated by the hive mind's thought pattern. If that does happen, at least there would be a definite possibility of once again reincarnating once my ant lifespan ends. As reincarnation would prove the existence of souls, I hope my soul has become strong enough to bring my memories along. Or do I really want that? This period of time has been going on forever and my brain would probably directly explode if it was all injected at the same time. I also just want to live a normal life. I'll make it my goal to stay inconspicuous as that's the best proven way to guarantee survival. Peace out.
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Where am I? Why do I have this deja vu feeling? I can't see, I can't feel. All my five senses are numbed. But I have this gut feeling, that tells me I've been in this situation before. However There seems to only be a feeling of hopelessness left. What could make me give up? "Jelly is good" seems to be the only thing I can remember.
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No matter what I do, I get this feeling of familiarity. The same as the kind that would develop from a habit over a lifetime. Like waking up every day at 6 am sharp to go to work. It feels so natural and worries me immensely. Is it possible that I am stuck in someone else's Groundhog Day? How many times has he messed up or did he already give up? To be honest if it was me, I would try to learn as much as I could and master different fighting styles. I would have to kill myself everyday but pain doesn't seem to be a foreign concept to me. Now that I actually think about it, as long as that person has half a brain he would do that. It would create the best possible situation to train skills that need resources without wasting anything. And with enough practice, you would be able to do impossible stunts like jumping out of a plane without a parachute and surviving by doing a few perfect rolls. I wish I could get that kind of opportunity. On second thought, I don't need that kind of opportunity, I just want my freedom. However without a body, the only thing that would change is the appearance of my surroundings. But if I get a body, I would gain the option of killing myself. I wouldn't even need to kill myself as I would starve in here. But wouldn't death be exactly what I need? If given the option, would I kill myself or wait for starvation?
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But then I heard it. An actual voice. In this G.o.d forsaken place. A voice that wouldn't fit any kind of person. It sounded like a dying old man's last wish but at the same time like a newborn's first cry. It wasn't a voice that could be produced by a lifeform. It contradicted itself with how murderous yet loving it sounded. Just hearing it made my soul start to collapse.
>>Let's have some fun<>
