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The Zombie Knight Saga 113 Cxiii. | 'O, Worldly Warrior...'

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Rezamaar wouldn't stop fidgeting.

'Would you relax?' said Dunstan. He wasn't exactly comfortable, either, crammed into the back of a plane with the rest of the Seventh Watcher's Unit. 'You're going to lose your grip on my arm.'

'Ugh. Fine.'

The concern wasn't that she would fall through the plane. The aircraft's hull had been soul-empowered to prevent that from happening. But unfortunately, that also made circ.u.mstances more dangerous for her. Save only for the planet itself, reapers were not affected by relative motion in physical reality. If she let go of Dunstan, she would become suddenly stationary relative to Eleg but not the aircraft. The result, therefore, would be her smas.h.i.+ng into the side of the cabin at eight hundred kilometers per hour. And even a reaper would not be able to survive that.

This was why soul-empowering airplanes was generally never done, with the one exception being in the transportation of captives. Technically, they were being "rea.s.signed," but the Gargoyle clearly didn't want any of their reapers escaping.

'G.o.d-f.u.c.king-dammit,' said Reza privately. 'Why couldn't she just let us go to Jesbol with that d.i.c.khole Miles?'

'I don't know.'

'I don't want to go to f.u.c.king Korgum!'

'So you've told me. Several times now.'

'Why are you so calm?! Do you even realize how much of a s.h.i.+tfest that place is right now?!'

He had an inkling. It would have been strange if he didn't. 'You did say that you didn't want to fight the Rainlords anymore.'

'Oh, yes, what a bright side. We've fixed a broken finger by chopping off the hand. Just wonderful.'

'Why is Korgum so chaotic, anyway?'

'You don't already know?'

'Not the details.'

'Well, I've avoided that place like a syphilitic monkey c.o.c.k, so I can't claim to be an expert, but my understanding is that there are several locations in Korgum that are strategically important, and Dozer keeps trying to get at them like a h.o.r.n.y dolphin at a nude beach.'

'...I hate the way you explain things.'

'Dolphins are f.u.c.ked up animals, y'know. They'll kill their own babies out of sheer boredom.'

'...Is that true?'

'It's either boredom, or because the females become ready to mate again when they don't have babies anymore. The males kill the kids so that they can have more s.e.x.'

'...Wow.'

'And yet everyone loves them. Then you've got animals like vampire bats. Everyone thinks they're creepy and gross because they drink blood, but they're actually super f.u.c.king nice.'

'I feel we've drifted away from my question about Korgum.'

'It's not my fault that you ask boring questions. Anyway, about vampire bats--they're f.u.c.king harmless, and they'll even adopt little bat babies that have been orphaned. That's cool as s.h.i.+t! But because they're not all cute and happy-looking, everyone thinks--'


'Alright, I get it. Were you a zoologist when you were alive?'

'Yes, Dunstan. Because I know two things about animals, that means I was a zoologist. Way to insult an entire profession, you f.u.c.king ignoramus.'

'You're right. I don't know what I was thinking. I may never recover from the shame I've brought upon myself.'

'Don't give me your dry sarcasm. I'm still upset here.'

'You say that like it's somehow abnormal.'

Reza's glowing red eyes glared at him a moment. 'I wonder if I could get Sanko to give you latrine duty.'

Dunstan made no response, and for a while, there was actual silence, much to his surprise. None of the other watchmen seemed especially talkative, perhaps busy conversing with their own unhappy reapers. Normally, a bit of peace and quiet was incredibly welcome, but here and now, it only felt uncomfortable. It made him think that Reza was genuinely worried and not just b.i.t.c.hing and moaning like usual. At length, he grasped for a new subject of his own.

'Why do you think she decided to bring us to Korgum with her?'

'Probably because our unit did most of Lawrence and Miles' dirty work, trying to capture the Elroys. She doesn't want us carrying out any more secret orders from them, I'd wager.'

Dunstan could believe that. He and Reza had heard about how Sanko had basically given Overra a time out like some kind of kindergartener. He'd also been one of the officers that Sanko called out to talk to, so he ended up right there behind her when the Rainlords decided not to cooperate. He didn't think he'd be forgetting that battle anytime soon. And frankly, after witnessing that level of combat, he felt more or less prepared for whatever Korgum would throw at him.

He tried to keep the conversation going. '...What do you think Sanko intends to do with the Elroy boy?'

Reza required a moment to acknowledge the question. 'Oh. Who knows? I'm sure she just didn't want to leave Cisco and Dennex with Miles.'

'Mm. Maybe she means to protect them herself.'

'Or interrogate them. Or both. I'm more concerned about what she intends to do about the Rainlords she didn't capture. As things stand, there aren't even any Vanguardians left in Sair trying to hunt them down.'

'She'll probably just dispatch a new division, won't she?'

'Probably, but until she does, the Rainlords will be able to do whatever they like. PREPARE whatever they like. And they have a history of being complete motherf.u.c.kers when it comes to that sort of thing.'

'Are you speaking from experience?'

'As it happens, I am. I was killed by one of their f.u.c.king b.o.o.by traps.'

That made Dunstan pause. 'Now I'm curious.'

'Oh, you want gory details? Because I have gory details. Literally details of the gore.'

'Well, I wasn't really--'

'Imagine stepping into a puddle,' said Reza, 'only to realize it was about a meter deeper than you expected. Imagine finding a bed of frozen spikes at the bottom, which then skewer your foot and dig up into your s.h.i.+n. Imagine writhing in agony, unable to move, as you watch a levee in front of you suddenly break and a tidal wave come cras.h.i.+ng toward you. Then imagine being crushed nearly to death by the impact, only to slowly drown.'

'...I was more interested in knowing why you were there.'

'How about some f.u.c.king pity?!'

'I'm sorry your death was so horrible, Reza. I'm sure you remember how wonderful mine was.'

'All things considered, I'd say getting ripped apart by a pack of Dantean wolves is a pretty radical way to go.'

'I think I would've rather drowned. Or been set on fire, maybe.'

'Oh, I doubt that. Burning alive is one of the most excruciating. I'd definitely take the wolves.'

'Hmph.'

'Alright, then, let's up the ante. Which would you choose? Lasers slowly burn your eyes out of your head and pierce your brain, melting it? Or you have to keep eating your favorite food until your stomach ruptures and kills you?'

'Why my favorite food?'

'Because it would gradually turn into your most hated food as you ate it until you puked. But you'd have to keep eating it, anyway, and every time you vomited would just mean that you have to eat even more of this thing that you once loved but is now your worst nightmare.'

'...You have a twisted imagination, you know that?'

'Fine, I'll give you a third option.' She paused. 'Uh... s.h.i.+t yourself in front of the person you love most until you die from embarra.s.sment.'

'Wow.'

'And if you're somehow not embarra.s.sed, then you just keep s.h.i.+tting forever.'

'Okay, I think we need some quiet time.'

She did not shut up, however. She pestered him with inane questions for the next hour and a half, and Dunstan regretted ever worrying about her.

Relief finally came when the aircraft hit a patch of turbulence. It lasted a while, then died down. Then a thunderous pop made the plane jerk violently upward and to the side, leaving half the watchmen in the room to dangle upside down from their crisscrossing seatbelts.

'Can you tell what's happening?' Dunstan asked.

'Call it a hunch, but I think someone is attacking us,' said Reza.

'Who?'

'I don't sense anyone flying near us.' After a beat, however, she said, 'Oh s.h.i.+t. Brace yourself.'

He did, but he didn't get the chance to ask why. Another, much louder pop arrived, this time accompanied by the very unwelcome sound of metal breaking. A lot of metal. The cabin lurched again and began spinning much too fast to have been in anything other than freefall.

Then the airplane unfolded. Dunstan watched the walls distort and peel themselves apart. Cabin pressure dropped in an instant, and the escaping wind tunnel pulled the air right out of Dunstan's lungs. For a moment, everyone dangled toward the hole in the cabin, but that didn't last long, because the hole grew so quickly that, soon, it ceased to even be so. Rather, it was just the open sky, the sun dawning there over the horizon, beautiful and entirely unfitting as the punis.h.i.+ng winds started tearing pa.s.sengers directly out of their seatbelts, leaving them to be swallowed by storm clouds below.

The plane was not gone, however. The metal had twisted and reformed beneath them. And it was moving now. Up and down like wings on either side. Dunstan, struggling even to keep his eyes opened, saw a metal neck rear up in front of them, rising into the shape of a bird's head.

It was Sanko, he realized. She had become the plane, integrating herself into it, making her body a bird of literal metal. And then he realized why.

A half dozen missiles were right there on the giant bird's tail, twirling and drawing closer with each pa.s.sing second, even as Sanko swooped down to pick up speed. They were heat-seekers, without a doubt--and probably soul-strengthened as well, since it seemed like Reza had been able to sense them at the last moment.

The metal bird shuddered and then rolled forward in midair. Its left wing distorted and then slapped all of the missiles away like flies. They staggered off course, and one detonated, which caused all of the others to explode in a chain that made the air tremble.

The Gargoyle's body swooped down into a dive again, and Dunstan had to soul-strengthen his own body before the wind and g-forces broke any more of his bones.

He could see what Sanko was gunning for below. The front chunk of the plane, which was carrying the pilots and most of the captive Rainlords. It vanished into the storm clouds, and Sanko pushed in after it. Wet and murky darkness washed over everything.

He tried to stay calm. He could only see gray. He could only hear howling winds. And at any moment, it felt like he might puke or pa.s.s out or both. Staying calm wasn't really an option.

But Reza's words were there in his head. 'I told you Korgum would suck!'

It took all his focus just to respond. 'Can you sense anything yet?!'

'Well, there are six fighter jets out there! At least! Happy you asked?!'

They finally made it through the clouds, and Dunstan could see that Sanko had nearly caught up to the missing half of the plane. She closed the gap by stretching her metal neck down and biting onto the hull. And that was all it took for the rest of the plane to become hers. The metal bulged and grew, adding to the Gargoyle's avian bulk.

Dunstan saw the jets Reza had mentioned. They broke through the stormy ceiling above, hardly more than specks to Dunstan's eyes at this distance, but the cloudy trails they left behind made their positions clear enough.

More missiles were already en route, but one of the jets had boldly decided to draw in close to Sanko in order to spray her with a hail of gunfire. It only lasted half a heartbeat as the jet sped by, but that was still enough time for the Gargoyle's wing to shoot out and s.n.a.t.c.h the jet out of the air. Her body wrenched to the side as she held on and devoured it whole, bulking up once again.

The next batch of missiles were there now, and Sanko bundled up around her pa.s.sengers, wrapping them in a suddenly windless darkness. Dunstan heard a loud swiping sound, followed by the clang of metal on metal, and then a string of explosions. One of them, however, caught the Gargoyle's side. Fire and shrapnel shredded Dunstan's cabin.

And then he was falling through open sky without a parachute, his two seatbelts still attached to him but not the wall that used to be at his back.

His fellow watchmen were all around him, most of them in multiple pieces.

The fall took a while--a few minutes, in fact, which was long enough for it to become surprisingly boring. Dunstan had never been skydiving before, but it didn't strike him as particularly thrilling. Without being able to alter his trajectory very much at all, he was stuck watching as the vast forest slowly crept closer.

Reza's excitement level seemed to have dropped significantly as well. 'Hey, do you think you'll survive this? A hundred wingw.a.n.gs says you don't.'

'I don't know what a wingw.a.n.g is.'

'It's any unit of money. I'd pick a specific one, but we're in Korgum now, and I don't really keep up with that s.h.i.+t anyway. You know how many different currencies have come and gone during my lifetime?'

'Three?'

'A little more than that, smart guy.'

'So four, then?'

Reza snickered. 'Y'know, I kinda like it when you play dumb. It makes you seem more innocent and charming. In fact, from now on, just do that forever.'

Dunstan finally reached the forest and crashed through the canopy at terminal velocity. The net of leaves and branches tried to break his fall and only narrowly succeeded. Wood exploded into splinters and fell with him, and his right leg snapped and then tore clean off. The final impact into the underbrush still shattered almost every bone that he could feel, and as he regained his senses, he was fairly certain that at least a few of his organs had been liquefied, though he was mainly just surprised that his brain had not been one of them.

The regeneration was already in effect as he struggled to leverage himself onto one arm. The blood that came shooting out of his mouth, nose, and eyes informed him that it would be a little while longer before he would be able to stand again.

'Hey, uh, Dunstan,' said Reza, more nervously again, 'I know you're still having a rough time right now, but we're not alone down here.'

He couldn't quite formulate a response yet.

'There are a bunch of servants around us,' she said, 'and most of them have f.u.c.ked up souls. And I don't wanna worry you, but I think they're gonna be tryin' to eat our faces here in a little bit.'

He rolled over and found the brunt of a thick tree for support. 'Hide underground for now,' Dunstan told her.

'Yeah, about that, uh, I'm sensing some weird s.h.i.+t underground, too, so...'

'Weird, how?'

'I'm not really sure. But if you could stand up right now, that'd be awesome.'

When his eyesight returned to him, it didn't help very much. The forest around him was so dense that hardly any of the early morning sunlight made it through the treetops. But he could hear now, too, so he held his breath and listened.

Rustling leaves. All around him. And a low, faint rumble beneath his feet. The ground was trembling. It could have been the Gargoyle's doing, but he was fairly sure that she was still in the sky.

'Straight ahead of you,' came Reza's warning, and Dunstan braced himself just in time to see a howling blur leap out from behind the forward treeline.

Unable to stand, and with only half of his body responding to him, Dunstan knew he would have to make some hearty sacrifices to his krypton transfiguration if he were to have any hope of winning. And indeed, when the salivating human monster landed on him and started biting into his face and digging into his chest, Dunstan converted huge chunks of his flesh into superheated gas. Every point of physical contact between the two of them burned. Even Dunstan's own face melted into a b.l.o.o.d.y, smoldering mess.

With his one good hand, he found the mindless person's head, which immediately bit his fingers off with metal teeth.

Dunstan sacrificed the whole hand and shoved through their skull. Brain matter blew out the back of their head, and the flailing body on top of him went suddenly limp. He shoved the corpse off and tried to stand again, finding a bit more success now that most of his legs had regenerated. He'd given up much of his torso, arms, and head, but the trade was worth it so long as he was still conscious.

'Can you still see me?' Reza asked.

'Yeah.' To his eyes, she was still perfectly visible in the low light, despite being a pitch black wraith.

'Follow me, then.'

She flew off, staying low and with a slack enough pace for Dunstan's shambling footsteps to keep up.

No more than twenty steps later, burning bright light came piercing through the darkness, but Dunstan was far from relieved when he saw that the source was another broken servant who'd set himself ablaze. The forest was already catching, Dunstan saw--orange flames licking bark and climbing into the canopy or leaping across the undergrowth.
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Dunstan bounded through the fire and barreled into the burning servant. He expected to have to wrestle with the creature, but instead, the impact made its melting head pop off its shoulders and bounce into a line of bushes, igniting them.

Still largely without the use of his arms, Dunstan rolled over and flipped himself back onto his feet so that he could keep running. He and Reza pushed through the growing flames without regard. His coat or his pants would occasionally catch, but it was easy to suffocate such small fires with his krypton.

Oddly enough, the wildfire actually made circ.u.mstances easier for him, clearing his path of more broken servants who, unlike him, were not fireproof. Not to mention, it bought him the time he needed in order to fully regenerate.

Reza came to a sudden stop, and Dunstan phased through her and nearly fell over. He looked around for more threats but didn't see any. 'What's wrong?' he asked.

Dennex flew through the wall of fire. Chunks of him were missing.

'You got free,' observed Reza.

'h.e.l.lo there,' he said, quite calmly. 'Would you mind terribly if I tagged along?'

'Don't wanna try flyin' through this mess on your own, eh?'

'No, I do not. I am guessing that those are Abolish soldiers that I sense above us.'

'And below us? Do you know what that is?'

'No, I don't. I thought it was a soul net at first, but it's not, is it?'

'No. It's moving, whatever it is. Like it's alive.'

Dunstan wanted to speak aloud, but the crack and roar of burning wood was too loud, and there was almost as much smoke as there was breathable oxygen, anyway. 'We're wasting time,' he told Reza.

'Right,' she said publicly. 'Well, come on then.'

They proceeded on together, keeping within the relative safety of the fire, letting it make way for them. Dunstan kept hearing explosions go off in the sky above them. As trees fell over and opened up his line of sight, he began seeing people and low-flying aircraft there. It gave him little more than a glimpse of what was happening, but if Dennex didn't want to brave that airs.p.a.ce, then it must have been pretty bad up there, he figured.

And then the ground heaved up in front of him, very nearly knocking him off his feet.

Dunstan caught himself on one knee, and when he looked up, he saw multiple pillars shooting out of the ground. Each was as broad as a school bus, and when they stopped moving, Dunstan realized that they had heads.

Gigantic worms, they appeared to be. Their hulking bodies bristled with visible electricity, and their beady eyes looked straight at him and Reza.

Noticeably, however, they were not attacking. They just remained there, motionless and staring.

Then a voice rang out. "Aha! I knew you would survive! Good job, Dunstan!"

Dunstan squinted as he noticed a figure standing atop the centermost worm. He couldn't place the voice, but it sounded familiar. He found a full breath of air and called out, "Who are you?!"

"Why, it's me! It's your grandpa!" The figure waved a hand, and the worm beneath him knelt down low enough for Dunstan to get a good look.

And Dunstan could hardly believe his eyes. He hadn't seen that wrinkled face since he was a child, but it hadn't changed a bit. As little sense as it made to him, there was no doubt about it. This was certainly Damian Rofal before him. His grandfather.

Damian laughed. "Feromas thought my plan would get you killed for sure, but ha! Shows what he knows!"

Dunstan finally found the words. "Grandpa, why are you here?!"

"For you, obviously! I've come to get you, my boy! Everyone else was easy to find, but it took months to track you down. You shouldn't run away from home, you know. Not that I'm complaining. How often do you get to blow up a field marshal's plane, eh?"

"That was YOUR doing?!"

"Well, yes and no. Abolish might've been under the impression that certain precious artifacts were onboard. But anyway! The important thing is that we're together now! Oh, and is this your reaper? Ah, no, but there are two with you. Which one do you belong to? Regardless, it is lovely to meet them both! I hope they're nice!"

Dunstan had so many questions that he just reached for the first one he could hold onto. "What the h.e.l.l are these giant worms?!"

"Oh, don't worry about them! They're my buddies! Don't pet them, though. I know they look nice and squishy, but they'll zap you."

'Mind hurrying this along?' said Feromas. 'We're still in danger, you know.'

"Ah, right. Let's get out of here, shall we? I'd rather not have to fight that Gargoyle you were with!"

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