Black Romance 20 Something Big

I wasn't really worried about myself. I had been with him long enough to build up a thick skin to his punishments. The scars I bore were my armor. He couldn't hurt me anymore than he already had. Death was the only other thing he had, and I knew he would never give me that because it was something I had begged him for.

'You'll always suffer, that's why you were brought to me.' His words were burned into my head, a constant reminder of how he truly saw me.

"Do you think your family is looking for you?"

My heart clenched at her question, turning the muscle to stone. Taking in a labored breath, my eyes closed tightly. The memory of that day flooded my mind, making my body numb.

The answer was simple. No, no one was out there looking for me.

But every once in awhile, I wondered if my siblings questioned where I was. And then I would remember how young they were when we were separated. Odds are, they didn't even realize I existed anymore.

There memories of me had probably faded, becoming more of a dream than a reality that was once viable. My sister was three and my brother was barely a year old, there minds were cleansed of their older sister by now, filled with new memories of whatever life they were living in.

They're fine and happy. You have to believe that.

"No one is looking for me, no one has ever been looking for me. I'm not one of the lucky ones with a chance out of this h.e.l.l."

"Oh," Aubrey said softly. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be, it's not your fault." The floor creaked outside my door, causing my back to stiffen. "Shh," I huffed out quickly.

"Why? What do you hear?"

Boom!

The noise caused my muscles to jerk in surprise.

"Who the f.u.c.k are you talking to?" A man's voice came out forcefully.

But he wasn't standing in my room, he was in Aubrey's.

s.h.i.+t. . .

Snapping up onto my knees, I threw my ear to the wall, pus.h.i.+ng it as hard as I could against it. Splaying an open palm on the sheet rock, I wanted desperately to climb through the wall and save her.

It was my idea to talk, not hers. I was the one who had reached out, I was the one who had decided to break a rule.

This is all my fault.

"N—no one, just myself."

His feet pounded over the floor, and I heard Aubrey let out a cry that made my stomach jump into my throat.

Her screams could probably be heard through the entire building. It sounded like she was being dragged away and her heels were sc.r.a.ping against the floor, doing their best to keep her inside.

"Let me go! No! No! I didn't do anything!"

Jumping to my feet, I ran to my door and started pounding on it. "It was me! I talked to her! Leave her alone! Take me a.s.shole!"

A loud bang hit my door, making me jump backwards. "Shut up, Jessie!"

"Leave her alone! It was me! Take me!"

Aubrey was crying loudly, her sobs fading as the man yanked her further and further away, bringing her to receive her punishment.

I stood like a statue in my room, guilt gnawing away at my insides like a rabid dog that killed a squirrel.

This is all my fault. I did this to her.

I didn't have much time to think about what had happened. Within seconds my door was thrown open and a man named Juno stepped in, grabbing me by the hair.

"You want to see what happens when something's your fault?" Yanking me out of my room, I followed on stumbling feet, doing my best to stay upright. "Let me show you."

Juno dragged me like a rag doll downstairs, walking me through the hall that led to the bas.e.m.e.nt. I could feel my stomach as it knotted, unsure what the h.e.l.l was going to happen.

It doesn't matter, you can handle it.

Her screams began to fill the air as we reached the door for the ditch. But Juno didn't open the door, he just held me there, his fingers pressed around the back of my neck, keeping me in place. I listened to her cries for help, I listened to the sound of her being hit, I listened as my choice created scars on her body.

And there was nothing I could do.

Juno loosened his grip, allowing my body to fall. Dropping onto my knees in the center of the hall, I pressed my fingertips to my temples. I wanted to take her pain away, I wanted to cry for what she was going through.

Yet, I couldn't. My tear ducts were dry as a desert, unable to do a f.u.c.king thing anymore.

Raking my nails through my hair, I looked up at the ceiling and prayed.

'If you do exist, you can forget everything I've ever asked of you, if you just let her live. Don't let him kill her too because of me. She doesn't deserve to suffer because of my stupidity.'

It was like I was poison, everything I touched seemed to die around me.

I watched my mother die, my father was probably long gone, my sister and brother were basically figments of my imagination at that point. Even if they were out there somewhere, they were unreachable, they might as well be dead. Samantha had lost her life because she wanted to help me.

Now Aubrey—I wasn't sure she was strong enough to survive.

This only cemented the idea in my head that I had to get out, I needed to get away.

And there was one last option that floated into my fingertips.

It was time to do something big.