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Chapter 22 - Thunder Fire
As soon as Old Mr. Yu finished speaking, the people watching immediately burst into a sudden uproar. All of their faces had expressions of shock.
The most stunned was Yu Manjiang. He couldn’t release the anger he had been holding, so froze in place. After a while, he finally regained his wits and slowly reached over to steady Old Mr. Yu. “Elder Yu, don’t be fooled by them. This is all a scam. Who knows if they didn’t plan this earlier and get information from some unknown place. Think about it, if Old Missus really sent the text, would she call you, what was it……‘stupid old man’?”
Yu Manjiang’s words weren’t completely unbelievable. Everyone knew that in life, Old Mrs. Yu was the most elegant and mannerly. In front of others, she never even showed her teeth when she smiled, so couldn’t possibly use such a vulgar nickname to call Old Mr. Yu.
As soon as he brought this up, everyone naturally remembered this. They suddenly became more suspicious of Yu Zhengdu.
Only to see Old Mr. Yu, who was normally gentle and well-spoken, slightly freeze. A blush even rose on his usually strict face. He hesitated for quite a bit before saying in embarra.s.sment, “That’s because you guys don’t know. My wife wasn’t an elegant person in private, she only acted that way in public. Not only has she called me stupid old man, she also used to tug on my ears all the time……”
Everyone: “…………”
It was over, this time it was really over. They never imagined that Old Mrs. Yu’s true appearance was like this.
They also never imagined that the image she had carefully crafted throughout her lifetime would be ruined in this manner after death.
But this whole affair proved the credibility of Yu Zhengdu’s text even more. They couldn’t have known what the already deceased Old Mrs. Yu was truly like in life, right? Their whole village had been in direct contact with Old Mrs. Yu for her entire lifetime and still didn’t know anything.
The crowd started a heated discussion:
“Is it real? They really have this kind of technology?”
“It’s just a scam. I don’t believe it.”
“How is it a scam? Didn’t you hear what Old Mr. Yu said? Even their family members didn’t know where that ring was, how could a scammer point it out so easily?”
“Isn’t that right. They even knew how Old Mrs. Yu called others in private. This scamming technique is too advanced, even if you get scammed by them you’re not missing out.”
“I think it’s impossible. Where would they get this kind of communication technology? Contacting the Underworld without having to cast spells, are you kidding me?”
“Why is it impossible. In ancient times they didn’t have phones, lights, or TVs, but didn’t someone invent them eventually?”
“Makes sense. If even the mortal realm can invent a telephone, then there must be that kind of genius in the Underworld too!”
“Exactly. After the scientists died, they could continue their experiments in the Underworld!”
Not soon after, without Yu Zhengdu needing to explain, the villagers had already completely discussed the possibility of messaging the Underworld.
Yu Manjiang’s words got blocked by this scene. His entire face became green.
Old Mr. Yu’s att.i.tude had completely changed. He looked at Shang Que and Yu Zhengdu with teary eyes, “As long as you guys are willing to send my wife texts, I’m willing to pay whatever you charge.”
“Uh, Old Mister please don’t say that……” Yu Zhengdu became very troubled too. Their original intent was only to speak up about the Three G.o.ds’ tyranny, but he didn’t expect for the situation to somehow escalate into the current scenario.
He could only say……Boss really has talent in becoming a capitalist!
But at least Shang Que very quickly spoke up. He glanced at Old Mr. Yu and said, “The living communicating with the deceased could reveal the secrets of the Heavens. It’s not something that can be done if you just pay some money.”
Yu Zhengdu hurriedly nodded. “Exactly. This is the same concept as the tongji performing divination to ask the G.o.ds questions. You can’t just text when you want to text.”
He paused, then added, “Our technology is only a little more advanced. The taboos of communicating with the Underworld can’t be resolved yet using the technology we have now.”
The look in Old Mr. Yu’s eyes was bewildered, but he refused to give up. “Then, then what can I do? I really want to speak to my wife again. Please, no matter what, you must help me send another message.”
Following his words, others in the crowd started shouting as well, “I want to send a message too!”
“I want to try too.”
Everyone seemed to be quite curious about this technology; they all wanted to try.
Yu Zhengdu looked at Boss, troubled, only to see Shang Que respond arrogantly, “I’ll think about it.”
Yu Zhengdu: “……” As expected, Boss still has such an aura!
Right then, a cold gust of wind suddenly appeared out of nowhere, causing the previous uproar to immediately quiet down. Everyone who had just been making a fuss about wanting to send a text froze, asking in confusion, “What’s going on? Why is the wind suddenly so strong?”
At the same time, the incense on the incense table started burning intensely. A stream of white smoke rose directly into the clouds, completely unaffected by the wind.
The tongji who had long since been forgotten by the crowd suddenly started shaking too. His eyes started rolling up and his expression was one of great pain. He cried out in surprise and fear, “It’s the Three G.o.ds. The Three G.o.ds have appeared!”
After this, he lunged to stand in front of the incense table, and first drank the previously prepared cup of talisman water in one gulp, then urgently started reciting the incantation, chanting, “G.o.ds come down and show your presence, from the left, follow me and turn, from the right, follow me and walk, just as the wind accompanies a fire and helps it soark2026;k2026;”
After he finished reading the incantation, the candle flames on the incense table surged higher with a “hong——”. The tongji’s eyes became completely white as he let out a deep roar and jumped to sit on the chair with nails.
The nails were long and sharp, glinting coldly in the sunlight. The tongji was naked from the waist up, but upon sitting so hard on the chair, nothing happened to his skin at all. He aggressively lifted his head and yelled angrily, “What miniscule beings dare to speak such blasphemy to mislead the crowd.”
The voice was low and rough, and everyone felt as if an immensely heavy weight had been placed onto their hearts. But the voice was completely different from the tongji’s original voice.
The crowd immediately went hongran and screamed:
“The Three G.o.ds, the Three G.o.ds have appeared!”
“The Three G.o.ds are speaking!”
The commotion was somewhat panicked in nature. It must be known that in the history of the Yu Clan, ever since the Three G.o.ds Temple had been erected, the Three G.o.ds rarely spoke. They only ever possessed the tongji to write with cinnabar on yellow paper what they wanted to communicate. This was everyone’s first time witnessing the Three G.o.ds speak, and they sounded extremely displeased, so everyone felt uncertain.
Yu Manjiang was the first to respond. He bent his knees on the spot and knelt, shouting, “Yu Manjiang greets the Three G.o.ds.”
With his start, the rest of the people at the plaza also knelt, yelling in sync, “We greet the Three G.o.ds.”
Daoist priest Kou was a religious master from an official, large temple and thus didn’t wors.h.i.+p little G.o.ds from Underworld temples. So though he didn’t kneel, he placed his hands together and bowed politely, “Greetings to the Three G.o.ds.”
Only Yu Zhengdu and Shang Que remained standing straight upright. Among a crowd of people kneeling, they were quite obvious. Shang Que even scoffed, “It doesn’t even have a phone, and needs to possess a body to speak. This G.o.d is really quite broke.”
Yu Zhengdu couldn’t help but look at his broke-a.s.s boss from the corner of his eye: ……Really want to say that you don’t have much either.
The tongji slammed a hand on the incense table, eyes as big as copper coins. His voice changed again, as if a different person had possessed him, and he pointed at Shang Que. “How dare you miniscule beings offend the G.o.ds. Today we three brothers will show you the might of the G.o.ds. We will take off years of your life as a warning to others to respect us.”
Following the tongji’s words, the large incense started burning faster, and the smoke blew directly upward, into the clouds.
Yu Manjiang and the Three G.o.ds had always had a close relations.h.i.+p. Upon witnessing this, he immediately lowered his head and recited, “The incense steadily responds to the universe, fragrance burning through the Heavenly doorway, the jitong opens his mouth, please tell disciple what is right and wrong.”
After this, he turned around and told Shang Que, “I already tried to warn you guys earlier not to try your tricks in front of the Three G.o.ds. Now you’ve caused the Three G.o.ds to become angry. Hurry and kneel to admit your wrongs.”
In his imagination, the Three G.o.ds appearing in front of the crowd and the miracle right in front of their eyes should cause Shang Que and Yu Zhengdu to be so scared that they would p.i.s.s themselves.
But he saw that the two were still standing proudly, especially Shang Que, who only glanced in that direction before lightly spitting out two words, “Fake G.o.d.”
As soon as he spoke, everyone in the crowd’s expression changed.
No matter what, the Yu Clan had still wors.h.i.+pped the Three G.o.ds for hundreds of years; their faith was deeply ingrained in their beings. Now that the Three G.o.ds had appeared, there was extreme pressure in everyone’s hearts. Upon seeing Shang Que act so disrespectful, they were all surprised, scared, and angry, but didn’t dare to speak up.
Only to see the tongji forcefully stand up and shout, outraged, “What did you say?”
There was scorn in Shang Que’s eyes, and his lips curved in a mocking smile. “An Underworld temple built in the mortal realm, wors.h.i.+pping ghosts. You were never considered true G.o.ds……”
Following his words, the tongji’s face slowly became twisted.
When the living died and had temples and statues erected for them in the mortal realm, these temples were called Underworld temples. The true beings being wors.h.i.+pped in these temples were ghosts and not G.o.ds, but if they received enough incense, they could possibly gain the recognition of the Heavens and officially join the G.o.dly ranks. But when compared to the true G.o.ds, they were always one step lower.
Shang Que’s words directly hit the Three G.o.ds’ sore spot.
He continued to dig the knife in deeper, saying, “Originally, the mortal realm wors.h.i.+pped you three, so you should have equally protected this land. But now, to satisfy your selfish desires, you have disregarded your wors.h.i.+ppers’ welfares. How embarra.s.sing.”
Shang Que’s words could be considered too harsh. The tongji’s expression immediately changed, and his voice was suddenly all three of their voices. “How dare you, miniscule being. You dare to desecrate the G.o.ds.”
“Today we will kill you, right now.”
Following their horrifying and twisted voices, the wind became even stronger. The tongji’s face slowly became black and his hair began standing straight up. His appearance was extremely monstrous.
Father Yu urgently said, “Zhengdu, you and Xiao Shang hurry and apologize to the Three G.o.ds——”
But Daoist priest Kou’s eyebrows slightly furrowed. His gaze on the tongji seemed hesitant. He said, “Something seems a little wrong……”
Shang Que remained unmoved in the wind. His voice was low and his message could be heard by everyone. “You have already fallen into demonish ways. You no longer deserve the incense and faith of the mortal realm……”
Upon hearing this, Daoist priest Kou’s heart skipped a beat. He immediately started calculating with his hands.
At the same time, Yu Zhengdu took out his phone and opened the Underworld Energy Detection program. He pointed it at the tongji and scanned, then let out a loud “f.u.c.k”: “What kind of G.o.d is this. There’s such a strong presence of Underworld energy!”
Daoist priest Kou who was in the middle of calculating: “……”
He slowly lowered his hands and inched over next to Yu Zhengdu. He peered over and asked, “Is this……”
“Yes.” Yu Zhengdu turned the phone so the screen was more in his line of sight. “This is our company’s Underworld Energy Detector. You can see that the tongji’s entire body is covered in Underworld energy, and the numbers are off the charts. Where can you find such a wrong G.o.d!”
Daoist priest Kou looked at the a.n.a.lysis result on the bottom of the screen: Underworld energy levels have surpa.s.sed our current measuring range and are higher than the levels a.s.sociated with possession by a malicious ghost. An error may have occurred; please redo the examination.
“As expected, your Underworld energy detection method is simple and fast,” Daoist priest Kou’s voice was filled with obvious envy, then his expression changed. “It seems like the Three G.o.ds have actually fallen into demonish ways, or else they wouldn’t be surrounded by so much Underworld energy.”
When he finished talking, he suddenly whipped out a copper coin sword from around his waist, then turned to face the tongji and spoke solemnly, “Everyone, the Three G.o.ds have fallen into demonish ways. If we don’t get rid of them now, they may become a threat and disrupt everyone’s peace. Can you all please immediately head home as I defeat this demon monster——”
Yu Manjiang was furious. He forcefully stood up and shouted, “What utter bulls.h.i.+t. The Yu Clan has wors.h.i.+pped the Three G.o.ds for hundreds of years, how is it possible that they are demons. Daoist priest Kou, what a waste of your religious master t.i.tle, even believing those two presumptuous youths. Aren’t you scared of the Three G.o.ds punis.h.i.+ng you?”
Before Daoist priest Kou could speak, the tongji spoke up first. “Too late. Those who have disrespected us must be punished today.”
The candle fire on the incense table leapt up, lighting up the tongji’s face that was slowly becoming more and more grotesque.
Shang Que tsk’d: “Too ugly.”
He stepped forward, about to take action, when his arm was suddenly pulled by someone. He turned around, only to see Yu Zhengdu sneakily come closer and lowly ask, “Boss, the enemy looks very strong. Can you handle him?”
Shang Que thought about it. “A small demon like him, I could eat three in one bite.”
Yu Zhengdu: “……”
Yu Zhengdu calmly persuaded him, “Please consider everyone’s mental endurance abilities. Don’t eat the demon right now.”
Shang Que was a reasonable boss. Upon hearing this, he really stopped and moved his ear closer to Yu Zhengdu. “Then what do you want me to do?”
Yu Zhengdu: “……” Ah, so mad, even Boss’s ear is this good looking!
Yu Zhengdu pressed his hands together. “Please be lowkey. I still need to go home and be a human.”
He struggled a bit, before learning forward to whisper in Boss’s ear. “How about you take the Three G.o.ds to go. Bring them home for a midnight snack.”
Shang Que side-eyed him and paused. “……I’m scared they’ll spoil.”
The two chatted like there was no one else around them, which p.i.s.sed the tongji, who was watching them, off. His eyes rolled behind his head, leaving only whites, and his right arm pointed to the sky. “Wait until I bring down the might of the G.o.ds to take your invaluable life——”
“This isn’t good. These two householders, please hurry and take a step back.” Daoist priest Kou had been anxiously watching the scene unfold. Now he took a step forward and hid Yu Zhengdu and Shang Que behind him. He held up a copper coin sword with one hand and threw out talismans with the other, then closed his eyes to chant, “Demon king be controlled, serve me Xuan, remove the evil spirits, Daoism prevails……”
The copper coin sword trembled, making gentle noises.
The cold wind grew stronger, causing great alarm.
Old Mr. Yu was unsteady on his feet due to the strong winds. His voice shook as he asked, “Daoist priest Kou, what’s happening?”
Yu Zhengdu reached over to steady him. “Old Mister, the Three G.o.ds have already fallen into demonish ways. You need to tell everyone to leave, or they might be harmed.”
Old Mr. Yu was in disbelief. “What? How can that be……”
Everyone’s faces were in pain from the gusts of cold wind. In panic, they looked towards Old Mr. Yu.
Yu Zhengdu said, “A real G.o.d would never want to take over the ancestral temple of the mortal realm. Besides, the presence of Underworld energy is so strong, how could a true G.o.d possibly be this way?”
As soon as he brought this up, Old Mr. Yu couldn’t help but be reminded of memories from long ago. When he was still a young child, he had the fortune of witnessing a miracle. The Three G.o.ds had revealed themselves then, and truly were as bright as the sun and moon, honest and true in appearance. The tongji then had worn a kind expression, completely unlike what had appeared today.
His heart skipped a beat, and he trembled as he stood up and yelled at the crowd, “Everyone please take cover. Be careful not to get hurt……”
He still felt a bit uncertain, so didn’t dare to directly say that the Three G.o.ds had fallen into demonish ways.
Yu Manjiang’s face was red with anger. He stomped his feet, “Elder Yu, how come even you are also……”
Old Mr. Yu was extremely respected among the Yu Clan’s clansmen. As soon as he spoke, everyone became hesitant. They subconsciously wanted to leave, but for some reason, it felt as if their knees had been filled with lead. They couldn’t move at all.
He heard Daoist priest Kou breathe out a long exhale. “There is no more magic in the mortal realm. I ultimately can’t borrow the power of the G.o.ds……”
With a clink, the red strings on the copper coin sword all broke. The copper coins fell to the ground, one by one, and Daoist priest Kou was forced to take several steps back, his face pale.
They looked again to see the tongji’s face had become blackish-purplish; his hair stood up like steel needles, and two gruesome fangs appeared in his mouth. The image was identical to that of demons in the picture books.
After witnessing this scene, everyone had no other choice but to believe that the Three G.o.ds had fallen into demonish ways. Daoist priest Kou held his breath and yelled, “Everyone hurry and run——hurry and run——”
But they couldn’t move their legs at all. Uncontrollable terror caused almost everyone to lose their minds.
At this time, a flash of lightning cut across the sky.
Someone lifted their head just in time to see Shang Que confidently walking forward in the direction of the tongji.
Daoist priest Kou was extremely anxious, urgently saying, “Householder Shang, hurry and come back. This is too dangerous!”
Yu Zhengdu’s heart was in his throat too, but at such a crucial moment, it was important to pretend be calm. He waved his hands around and said, “Don’t worry, we have already reported the situation here in a text to the Underworld. They’ve promised to lend us some magic to help in casting spells.”
Daoist priest Kou: “……”
Only to see Shang Que limply lift his hand and throw out a magical seal, cussing out loud, “Trashy fake G.o.d. Immediately kneel and apologize.”
Daoist priest Kou was shocked. “……You use your magical seals like that?”
It must be known that ever since he started learning the ways of the Dao, he had always bathed and perfumed himself, meditated and prayed before borrowing the power of the G.o.ds. Magical seals were the treasure of each sect, so needed to be used with the utmost respect, as if they were the G.o.ds themselves. Who dared to throw them out so casually……
Yu Zhengdu hurriedly made up an excuse for Boss. “Those who work with the Internet are a bit more casual.”
Daoist priest Kou was speechless but also very worried. He said, “But there is very little magical energy left in the mortal realm. How much power can you borrow using a magical seal?”
Only to hear the roar of thunder as thunder fire fell from the sky and struck the incense table in front of the tongji. The table broke in half and caught on fire, lighting up the entire plaza.
A second round of thunder fire followed, landing in the Three G.o.ds Temple and causing the Three G.o.ds statue to fall over, cracking into a million pieces.
The large incense snapped in the middle and the incense burner broke in half. All the incense ash was swept away by the wind.
The burning fire surrounded the tongji, trapping him inside. The cold gust of wind mysteriously stopped. Shang Que stood there, disdainful as usual, with his hands behind his back. “Apologize.”
The tongji’s hair that had previously stood up like steel needles now wilted. His sharp teeth shrank down too, and his blackish-purplish face became a ghastly white.
Immediately following, they fell on the ground, kneeling to grovel, “Don’t don’t don’t, don’t strike me with the thunder fire. I’ll never do it again——”
And then his voice changed. “It’s all my big brother’s fault. My big brother was greedy and I couldn’t control him!”
After this another voice appeared. “Stop trying to dodge responsibility. All three of us decided this together, don’t think you can push it all onto me!”
The three voices kept switching in the tongji’s body, taking turns insulting the others. Soon after, they even started slapping their own face: “I’ll beat you to death!”
“I’ll hit you two!”
“Bring it on, who’s afraid of who? Don’t think I don’t know about you secretly hiding the gold yuanbaos!”
Everyone at the scene: “……………………????”
Yu Manjiang: “……………………????”
As for the most tragic, that was definitely the tongji.
Daoist priest Kou was stunned. He stared at Yu Zhengdu and could barely complete his sentence. “How did you, you guys borrow the thunder fire?”
And two at that!
Yu Zhengdu put his phone away and responded very humbly. “Technology is changing the world. Communications technology is allowing us to contact other worlds with greater frequencies, so our collaboration is much simpler and more effective.”