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My Soul Will Find Yours 56 I Look Ugly?

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I woke up earlier than usual to find Kaname wide-awake and staring out the garden through an open window. His hip was propped on the windowsill, his arms crossed on his chest, and on his face was a brooding expression. I got up and joined him, hugging him from behind.

"Did you even get some sleep?" I asked softly. I rested my head on the center of his back.

"I did," he s.h.i.+fted so he was facing me. "I just also woke up."

"It's almost time for you to return to the nakoku[1]," I complained. "Time surely really flies when one is having fun."

"I'll return and be with you on my daily visits."

"Do you not intend to visit Lady Mami and Lady Ayaka?"

"Do you want me to?" he stared at me, evaluating my reaction.

"To be honest, no," I admitted. "But you are the shogun, you cannot neglect your other wives and pamper me and only me."

He sighed. "My beloved wife is so levelheaded, it's almost disappointing."

I giggled. "Someone has to be, otherwise we might get in trouble."

~~~

Before he went back to his personal palace, I pulled my husband into a hug. I didn't want him to go… Realizing how I was overreacting, my body shook in a silent laughter.

"What's so funny?" he asked.

"I'm funny," I smiled wryly. "You'll technically still be inside the palace but I oddly feel like the wife of a soldier sending her husband off to his a.s.signment."

"Do you wish I was an ordinary man so you won't have to share me to the world?" his tone was a bit sad.

"Yes… And no. However, if you weren't the shogun, you wouldn't be the one who stopped Shoutkun in the pine forest," I told him. "We would have met in a different way although I'd most likely be another man's property then."

"I don't like the idea of you with another man," he stiffened in my embrace. "No one else has the right to touch you. I will sever the hands of any man who would dare and feed it to the hawks."

"There, there," I stroked his back to calm him. "As if I'd let someone else touch me. I'll slit their throats without hesitation!"

"You don't seem to remember how you almost lost it when you Shouta decapitated that bandit," he teased me although he was obviously delighted by my response.

"Ugh," I s.h.i.+vered when I remembered the gory scene. "By the way, you were there all along, weren't you?"

"Yes. I actually got to where the bandits were before Shouta did. I also saw you free Yuki while he fought them."

"You were quite scary back then, you were so cold and domineering."

"And you were already very amusing," he laughed as if he remembered something funny. "When you realized that I caught you staring at me, I almost guffawed. Your little finger wave and the sheepish look on your face were priceless."

"Haha, very funny," I gave his chest a playful punch.

"That reminds me," he grabbed my face before stretching my mouth open. "I don't like you painting your teeth black. I prefer seeing them white and pearly. Also, never shave your brows again. You almost gave me a heart attack during my return, thankfully they're growing back. Whoever pressured you to do these things must have wanted to make you look ugly."


"So you're saying I look ugly?" I lifted one brow questioningly.

"Of course not," he denied. "Just don't do this again. I like you best when you're looking like a freshly picked ume[2] and not some sort of daif.u.ku mochi[3].

~~~

I hummed to myself as I folded Kaname's sleeping robe. I hugged it for a brief moment and took a sniff. It smelled just like him, I suddenly felt tingly all over. I was about to leave the room when a familiar rectangular thing caught my eye. I walked towards my dresser with a frown.

'I swear I left this on the dinner table last night,' I told myself.

I tapped the screen of my phone and went to its gallery. When the camera roll loaded, my lips curved up. My husband took pictures of a sleeping me and a smiling him last night. There were almost twenty photos of him kissing different parts of my face as I slept. In some photos, his eyes were closed while in some, they were staring straight to the screen with a softness that reminded me of his proposal.

Well, he did say he wanted to take more photos of us together….

I tapped the screen a few times more and stopped only when my favorite photo from the bunch has finally become my wallpaper. The photo was of him kissing my forehead, his long lashes rested on his under eye as he did so.

I turned my phone off and placed it inside my backpack. I was almost at the sliding door when it suddenly opened. A familiar face pounced at me like the bunny she reminded me of.

"Lady Ayaka!" I exclaimed as I tried to keep my feet balanced.

"Surprise!" she crowed. "I'm all better now!"

"I can see that," I laughed. "But you have to be careful, you're already pregnant! You shouldn't do reckless things like that!"

"You worry too much, nee-chan," she gave me a finger-wag. "How have you been?"

"G-good," I answered awkwardly as I was racked with guilt. I couldn't tell her of Kaname's early return.

"Did you know? Kaname-sama returned last night," her eyes gleamed with excitement. "I hope he visits me today so I can tell him about our child."

My eyes immediately went to her belly. Her pregnancy wasn't obvious, thanks to the layers of kimono she was wearing. "He's back?" I feigned ignorance. "I didn't know."

"Hai," she toyed with a few strands of her loose hair. "Nee-chan, if he chooses you later in the bell corridor, could you decline so that he has no other choice but to select another wife?"

"Can I even do that?" her request caught me off guard.

"No," she shook her head. "But he favors you so much, I'm sure he'll forgive you."

"Lady Ayaka—" I started to protest but she took my hands and held them tightly.

"Please, this is all I ask," she scrunched her eyes shut as if she was expecting a heavy blow. "I must inform him that I'm carrying his child today, I cannot wait any longer."

I stared at her young and beautiful face helplessly. Thinking about how I've monopolized our husband these past few weeks and how I had him all to myself for a whole day yesterday, I felt guiltier. "I'll see what I can do," I answered vaguely. It was neither a yes nor a direct no.

"I'll take that as a yes!" she gave me a hug. "I'd better get going now and prepare for his visit. I'll see you later!"

And just like that, Ayaka left my room. I remained rooted on the spot as I thought of what I just got myself into. It wasn't until Ryuko-san entered the room and clapped her hands in front of my face that I realized that I fell into a daze.

-------------------------------------------------

[1] AKA middle palace, this is where the shogun and his personal servants live.

[2] Plum blossom.

[3] Mochi stuffed with a sweet filling.

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