The Union 33 The Stupid And The Talentless

"What?" Elisar turned. What stupid things is he talking about this time?

"Where do you want to live after you retire?" Jop then sighed and looked at the stars with a smile "Twelve more years and we can already retire"

"Retire?" Elisar scoffed and shook his head "We are at war and you think about retirement? Think about surviving those twelve years first."

"It's not like we are going to lose. We have Prince Timothy so we won't lose."

Elisar also felt safe with the presence of the prince. The Rooster Prince was smart. Even if they were put into a difficult situation, he would think of a way. But winning and surviving were two different things. For lowly soldiers like them, survival in times of war was like distant dream.

"Winning is not the same with survival. We won our last battle but many of our brothers died" Elisar said

"Oh come on!" Jop led his horse closer to Elisar. He then wrapped his one arm around Elisar's neck and grinned "Can't you be a little optimistic? You'll grow old faster if you think like that"

"First of all, I survived all these years because I think like this. Second" he pushed Jop's arm away from his neck "Get your hands off me. I almost fell off my horse you b.a.s.t.a.r.d"

Jop laughed. "But you didn't and you won't. I did that to you dozens of times already but you did not fall even once"

"Another way of saying that is you tried to kill me dozens of times already but failed everytime"

"Why would I try to kill you? You are my best friend" he grinned and offered his knuckle to Elisar. "Come on brother, don't keep me hanging"

In response, Elisar just rolled his eyes. "No" he said firmly

"Why?"

"Because it's stupid"

"It's not stupid. This is how best friends declare their friends.h.i.+p" Jop defended "Come on El. My arm is getting tired"

Jop was actually his best friend, if his definition of a best friend was correct. They grew up together in a village near Solon and even became hired blades at one point in their lives. When they decided that they had enough of the underworld, they both joined the army. The two of them practically spent their whole lives together so Jop was the closest person to him. But Elisar can't admit this to Jop.

"Even if your arm falls off your body, I would never" Elisar declared firmly. He finds the gesture awkward. Jop actually copied the gesture from Prince Timothy himself. One day he saw Prince Timothy and Erik hit their knuckles as a sign of friends.h.i.+p. Ever since that day, Jop had always pestered him about b.u.mping their fists together.

Jop retracted his fist and chuckled "You never change El. By the way, who's the beneficiary for your pension? Being so pessimistic, I believe you already planned whom to give your money in case you die. Your family are all dead so it must be one of the brothers right?"

Elisar turned away from Jop. "Wh..why should I tell you" he stuttered

"I'm just curious. Come on tell me." Jop urged

"I told the centurion to divide the money equally among the century. In case I die, buy some drinks"

"Really?" Jop's eyes went wide "That must be the reason why you always think I'm trying to kill you whenever I grab onto your neck on horseback" he jested

"Many people died by falling from their horse so I'm not actually wrong" Elisar reasoned "And can you be a little more serious about this? Prince Timothy gave us an important mission so we should not mess around"

"I'm not messing around. I was just trying to calm you. You were so nervous earlier" Jop grinned

"Hhha. Very funny Jop. During our first mission, who peed his pants again because the merchant chased him with an axe?"

"You promised to forget that!" Jop protested "And who wouldn't. It was a very huge axe"

"Who goes in there!" a man on horseback suddenly approached them. Elisar and Jop were surprised by the sudden appearance of the Tulosan. He must be a scout. They never expected the Tulosans to send scouts this far. But from the looks of his armor, he was not a Knight so Elisar felt relieved. Worst case scenario, they have to kill the Tulosan. It would be hard to kill a knight with their current weapons. Thankfully, the man was just wearing poorly-made gambeson.

"Ahoy Brother" Jop said with a Tulosan accent. After hearing those words, Elisar couldn't help but glare at him. His accent was good, but who says 'ahoy brother' at a soldier? It was a greeting among the navy. n.o.body greets a fellow soldier like that.

"What?" The Tulosan was confused by Jop's greeting. He led his horse closer. Elisar could now see his face.

"Pardon my friend, brother. He's a little strange" Elisar said. He tried to salvage the situation but he completely butchered his Tulosan accent. The moment those words left his mouth, he knew that he made a mistake. He examined the Tulosan's expression. It was of disbelief. He confirmed that they had been revealed.

"You" The Tulosan frowned and pointed at them. But he then lowered his trembling arm and gave a fake smile "Ah forgive me brother. Continue with your journey. Don't mind me" he said in a shaky voice

"Kill him" Elisar immediately whispered to Jop. He knew that the Tulosan already found out about their ident.i.ty and was just acting dumb. He wanted to escape so that he could reveal the presence of spies. But Elisar can't let him leave. They will fail the mission if the man revealed them to the rest of the Tulosans.

Jop nodded after hearing Elisar's whisper. Without question, he galloped towards the Tulosan. Elisar also did the same. The two of them rushed towards the Tulosan. The Tulosan was quick and smart. He realized that he couldn't win this so he tried to flee.

The two of them chased the Tulosan. "Help! Enemies!" the Tulosan shouted. This is bad, Elisar thought. Even though they were still a few hours away from the Tulosan camp, there's still a chance that someone will hear them.

Jop grabbed the reins of his horse firmly. He positioned his body perfectly to achieve maximum speed. Elisar must admit that Jop was a better soldier compared to him. Jop's horse quickly reduced the distance. Jop then jumped towards the Tulosan and pushed him. The Tulosan fell off his horse.

Elisar did not waste any time and led his horse towards the Tulosan. One of the horse's foot hit the Tulosan somewhere in the torso. Upon further inspection, Elisar noticed that the horse's stomp crushed the Tulosan's chest. The Tulosan cried in pain, but his cry was shortened by his crushed chest. Elisar quickly dismounted his horse and grabbed the hilt of his dagger. He must kill the man quickly. He then slit the Tulosan's throat. After a while, the Tulosan died.

Everything happened so fast. Elisar was staring blankly at the Tulosan's corpse when Jop's voice echoed behind him.

"It's a team effort then" Jop said.

Elisar frowned after hearing another stupid remark from Jop. They almost failed their mission so this was not the time to make another stupid remark. "Team effort? What?" he looked at him.

"Team effort. My accent was good, but my response was bad. Your response was good, but your accent was bad." He shrugged

"No. It's all your fault." Elisar said as he wiped the dagger with a cloth. He did it thoroughly lest the blood rusts the steel. "You were the one in charge of talking and you failed. 'Ahoy brother'? What the h.e.l.l."

"Who are you to talk? That Tulosan accent of yours was so bad." Jop retorted

"If I only have your skills, I would have reached the rank of Prefect a long time ago" Elisar mounted his horse. They will just leave the Tulosan. It's night anyway so n.o.body will see him.

"Well look at it the other way. If I only had your brains then I would also have reached the rank of Prefect years ago" Jop countered.

Elisar sighed "Just shut up okay? Please give me silence" he pleaded "Just focus on our mission"

"No I won't. I will keep on talking. " Jop defiantly said "You're still so nervous I'm afraid you'll pee your pants" he smirked

After a few hours of riding, Elisar and Jop reached the Tulosan camp. Several Tulosan scouts stopped inspected them on their way, but Jop did the talking and Elisar the thinking so the scouts did not suspect them. The Tulosan camp was just beyond the burnt forest. It seems that the fire delayed the Tulosans for few days.

Elisar and Jop hid their horses behind a nearby tree. After that, they dismounted and started walking towards the camp. This is it, Elisar thought. He was a little nervous. He knew the importance of their mission so there's no room for error.