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'If I don't get something to eat soon, you'll be representing me on a manslaughter charge, Brodie.'
The farmers' market was taking place in the car park opposite the office in Castle Terrace, and it was becoming increasingly difficult to keep Lavender indoors. The vendors had travelled from all over Scotland and were plying their wares like medieval shopkeepers under the shadow of Edinburgh Castle. Compet.i.tion was fierce and marketing tactics came from the sharp end. Fish merchants from Arbroath were smoking their own haddock in whisky-soaked woodchips. They were all calling to Lavender, according to her, and I didn't know how long she could resist it.
'Stop thinking of your stomach for once, Lavender,' I entreated her. 'That reminds me, though did Eddie like your coq au vin?'
She snorted before replying. 'Those b.l.o.o.d.y books say that the way to a man's heart is through his stomach, but Eddie just doesn't have that big an appet.i.te.'
I raised one eyebrow, a feat I had mastered at the age of ten, even though I had to spend a whole summer holiday in front of the mirror to do it.
Lavender went on I'd touched on her favourite subject now. 'He's not that interested in food.' Her eyes went misty as she added, 'which is how he manages to maintain his lithe footballer's physique.'
'I'll take your word for it,' I said, not wanting to spend any time thinking about Drunk Eddie's body.
'Don't you want details, Brodie? Are you not interested in my life? How about a blow-for-blow account, as it were?' she teased.
'No intriguing as I'm sure your s.e.x life is, Lav, I'd rather save my own a.r.s.e than hear about Eddie's.'
'Spoil-sport.'
The office was quiet on a Sat.u.r.day morning, the atmosphere relaxed, and Lavender and I tended to get through a lot of work. For once, the phones were silent and it wasn't a sign that business was going down the tubes. There were no courts sitting on a Sat.u.r.day, and criminals tended to be lying in their beds sleeping off a drink-and drug-fuelled fugue. They needed their beauty sleep before they hit Princes Street in the afternoon for a bit of shoplifting.
I wandered over to one of the two whiteboards that hung in my office. The one on the left was known as the prison visiting board. It did what it said on the label: all our clients who were in custody were on that board, along with the date that someone from the firm had last seen them.
'Laura McGuigan, Lavender? If she was at Cornton Vale, why didn't she pop in to see Tanya Hayder? Her rehab at Fearns is only down the road.'
'You know Laura, Brodie she's a law unto herself and this ha.s.sle isn't making her any easier to manage.'
The board on the right detailed Friday's trials we hadn't been that busy. The firm couldn't continue to leak money like this. I wiped it clean and picked up the red marker.
'Let's start from the beginning.' I motioned to Lavender to sit down so that we could get through things. 'How are you getting on with the witness in the Alchemist case?' I knew from our previous discussion that the man had phoned up to collect his reward, but when Lavender had asked him to be a witness he had refused. However, I also knew that Lavender was not the sort of girl to take 'no' for an answer just ask Eddie. She had stalked him until he had given in. Such was the cleverness of Lav, he was convinced it had been love at first sight.
'Strangely enough, he was on the phone yesterday. Apparently DI Bancho has been hara.s.sing him. Putting pressure on him not to testify.'
'How did you manage to get that out of him, you witch?'
'He's not in the witness box yet, Brodie, he's just not quite such a fan of our boys in blue as he was a week ago.'
'They're not all like Bancho.'
'No some are like Desk Sergeant Munro.'
Much as it pained me to defend him, in all fairness I couldn't tar Munro with the same brush, even if he was constantly horrified by the notion of a 'la.s.sie' taking a man's job.
'Munro's honest enough, I guess so what are you going to do to turn the reluctant witness to the dark side?'
Lavender tapped the side of her nose with her finger.
'Ask no questions and you'll get no lies.'
I had nothing definite to write on the board, so I wandered over to the window. The market was getting busier. The mobile coffee box was heaving and a large queue of caffeine addicts had formed. Lizzie was too busy meeting their needs to give her usual wave. She was working overtime trying to get enough money to purchase a pair of Jimmy Choos she'd fallen in love with in Harvey Nicks.
I saw Lavender check out where I was looking and thought I could use her calorie obsession to get out of the office for a few minutes. 'I'd kill for some chocolate right now. Do you fancy a mocha? Lizzie's working and I could text our order over?'
'I'm always up for one, but ask her to deliver because you're going nowhere until we've finished.' The striped canvas awnings on the stalls flapped cheerily in the breeze and I longed to be outside, but Lavender was a hard taskmaster. I knew she was serious. She would keep my nose in the office until our desks were clear.
'What's the score on the Tymar front, have you been able to make any headway?' I asked her.
Lavender took a small compact out of her make-up bag and applied her lipgloss. I knew then she was considering her options. It was rare for her not to just blurt out the first thing that came into her head. How much was she prepared to tell me?
'I've been trying to speak to Roddie,' she admitted. 'But he's avoiding me like the plague so it's a sure sign that the wee b.a.s.t.a.r.d knows something.'
After Kailash was found not guilty of the murder of my father, I was in a position to bargain. Revenge is a dish best served cold, they say, but when I gave Roddie what he deserved, everything was still sizzling. Roddie Urquart had been shown up as the lying toad he truly was, and although lawyerly etiquette would never take everything away from a man who had done so much wrong, they all knew that I was behind his fall. Sometimes, Edinburgh legal circles needed to be reminded of that fact. Perhaps I had been too rash. As my grandad had cautioned me, I should keep my enemies close.
'Where is Roddie these days?' I asked.
'He's in Geneva close to his money. I don't know why you're so soft with him, Brodie. He's a consultant with this firm, he draws his money every month, yet as far as I can see he does nothing.'
'Would you want him here, Lav, hanging around? Personally, I don't care how much it costs me to keep him away.'
'Has anyone figured out what he does in the Geneva office?' she replied.
'You know I'm not involved in the commercial department, but I've heard them say he's very useful in setting up offsh.o.r.e companies. He's also a tax specialist maybe we're too hard on him; the others seem to think he earns his crust.'
'Brodie, he earns a fortune for doing nothing crust, my a.r.s.e; that lad's on caviar.'
The phone rang to interrupt Lavender's diatribe.
'It's reception there are two coffees at the front desk. The doorman wonders if you want him to pay for them?'
'Tell John to come on up and I'll square up with him right away,' I answered.
John the doorman was keen not to be out of pocket because he was in our office in a flash. The mocha was still hot and sweet. There wasn't as much cream on top as I liked, given that Lizzie was quite fastidious with regards to fat content in her diet, and, consequently, in everyone else's. I really preferred it when Bob, the usual barista, worked on a Sat.u.r.day. He weighed in at eighteen stone and knew how to ladle on the chocolate.
'I'm in two minds about whether or not to get Moses involved,' Lavender told me when John had gone. She looked at me anxiously. I noticed that she had a blob of cream on her nose. 'I just wanted to run it past you in case it would jeopardise your career but then I thought it was a bit too late to start thinking about that.' She winked.
Lavender didn't usually bother to consult me on such matters.
'You must be worried.'
'Aren't you? I looked at what I knew about Alex Cattanach and the one thing I had to conclude is that she's not an idiot, or at least she wasn't before the attack.'
'Tasteless, Lavender.'
'You know what I mean she wasn't one to waste her time chasing wild geese. Alex was hunting you because she knew there was money laundering going on in this firm.'
'That's a serious accusation. If you're right, then I'm facing fourteen years under the Proceeds of Crime Act.'
'Well, if you get done for the attack on Alex Cattanach then we'd better hope that your grandad can get you concurrent sentences.'
'I can see why you're thinking of seeing what Moses can find out, Lav, but he's wrapped up in his own troubles. Can't you find out if Roddie's been up to anything and just fix it yourself?'
She stared at me, knowing what I was really asking.
'That's a tall order even for me, Brodie. I've spoken to some of my friends and we're working on it, actually, but nothing's concrete yet.'
Lavender's 'friends' were a group of computer nerds that she'd met on a course called 'How to build a fire- wall'. This course was for would-be security experts but the first thing they were taught was how to tear a fire-wall down. I'm not sure Lavender, like many of her fellow students, bothered to stay for the rest of the course.
'So,' I said. 'Have you found out anything about Tymar Productions?'
'I started by looking at the way Alex worked and she is absolutely b.l.o.o.d.y certain that we are at it. I asked myself why?' Lavender liked to do full justice to her stories. I just had to sit back and be patient.
'Cattanach was appointed Chief Accountant to the Law Society in 1999. It was a surprising appointment because she was young and female. Alex made a pledge to weed out bent solicitors. The first thing she did was to increase the frequency of the routine inspections. That meant she sent her teams of investigators into offices without warning to go through their books. Nineteen solicitors were charged with fraud as a result. We had a routine inspection so what did she find that worried her? I think the fact that we are losing money as a result of Kailash and Roddie set her alarms off.'
'I was hoping you'd have better news have you got any sweeties in your bag to sugar the pill?'
She threw a rumpled paper bag of aniseed b.a.l.l.s at me.
'Will you let me finish? Cattanach's golden rule is: if the firm is not doing well, the partners will turn a blind eye to money laundering. Who am I to say she's wrong? I then spoke to Kailash about Tymar Productions. She knows that Roddie set this group up. It's an offsh.o.r.e company registered in Cyprus with a Swiss bank account.'
'So, where are you at the moment?' I asked, not letting on that I knew this already.
'I'm trying to get the client details of the Credit Suisse, but it's easier to get into a nun's knickers than this lot.'
I nodded. I had faith that, given enough time, Lavender would get to the bottom of it. The question was could I buy her that time? I didn't really want to know the answer to the question after that. I thought that the ostrich approach was eminently sensible, but knew that I had to ask.
'What's happening with the mandates?'
Lavender drew breath. A good sign, because she had a tendency to hold her breath when she was tense. I immediately relaxed.
'I spoke to Moses yesterday morning. I told him not to worry, I was just calling because I was worried about him the word on the street is that he can't hack things just now. I said I didn't mind the fact that the Angels were going elsewhere I was just vexed for him.'
'Devious when did the phone calls start coming?'
'By eleven thirty most of them had phoned begging to come back ... and they'd already called Bridget.'
The phone rang before I could congratulate her.
'It's for you David Ross' wife,' she told me.
It meant nothing. I shrugged my shoulders.
Lavender started scribbling on a piece of paper.
Donna Diamond's wife she's outside the office.
'Tell her I'll be right down,' I shouted as I ran down the stairs.
Maybe my luck was turning after all.
Chapter Thirty-Two.
'Do you fancy a buffalo burger?'
Marjorie shook her head at my offer. 'I've gone right off food since they found him I mean, since they found Donna.'
'You don't mind if I go ahead, do you?'
As soon as I'd got the burger in my hand, it was gone.
'Thanks very much how did you know I'd be hungry?' Joe said as he grabbed it.
'What are you doing here? Apart from nicking my food?' I asked.
'Marjorie asked me to come,' he told me.
I threw an evil look in his direction. It bounced right back.
'She was afraid to meet you by herself I can't think why,' he said in a lower voice.
'I asked Joe here because he makes me feel safe,' Majorie said, practically nuzzling up to him. Joe towered over her, his dark blue and red Ferguson kilt swinging gently in the breeze. He had no right to wear any kilt really, being of Irish descent, but he had chosen the modern Ferguson tartan because he liked the colours and the pattern. It was all vanity to tell the truth. His antique badger-fur sporran was more effective than sticking a sock down his Y-fronts.
b.i.t.c.hiness bubbled up inside me, even though Marjorie was about a hundred and dog plain. I didn't like the way she was proprietarily hanging on to his arm. I wanted to say, 'So you still like a man in a skirt?', but thankfully I managed to control myself by biting down hard on my remaining burger.
'Have you told Brodie yet what you mentioned to me on the phone, Marjorie?'
So, they'd been having chummy wee chats now? I knew that I had more to bother about than that, but it still niggled me.
'No, Joe I told you in confidence and you suggested that I tell her. It was your idea, not mine.'
Widowhood wasn't bringing out the best in Marjorie, and I didn't feel sympathetic enough not to ask what was bothering her. 'You seem to have some problem with me whatever I've done to cause this, I'm sorry,' I lied. I was only trying to make a stab at amends because my hunch told me that she knew something. She had some information I needed and, unless I could gain her confidence, there was no way I was getting it. Even her pensioner l.u.s.t for Joe looked unlikely to overcome her caginess with me.
'My husband has just been found murdered up Calton Hill, Miss McLennan.'
Husband? It was hard to think of Donna Diamond as anyone's husband.
'I can see what you're thinking.' Marjorie must have been a good mind-reader then. 'How could I still love that freak as a husband?'
Did she think portraying me in a bad light would give her a better chance with Joe? I was getting less and less keen on the grieving widow with every pa.s.sing minute. In fact, she was downright creepy her husband, wife, partner, pal, whatever, had just been found slaughtered, and her main concern was getting up Joe's kilt.
'I liked Donna,' I said, trying to take the wind out of her sails. 'I'd certainly never think of her as a "freak" and I'm very sorry for your loss.'
An elderly woman struggling with a box of organic vegetables barged past me, knocking me into Joe. Marjorie didn't look pleased. Under other circ.u.mstances this would be funny; I'd often joked with him that he was the pensioner's toy-boy.