Release Me: A Novel Part 12

Valet? I was raised in a family with quite a bit of Texas oil money, but n.o.body in my family ever had a valet.

"The painting is beautiful. But I'm surprised to see a pastoral scene in your home."

"Are you?" He sounds genuinely surprised. "Why?"

"You're so intent on a nude for your new place." I shrug. "I just wouldn't have pegged you for flowers and trees and all that stuff."

"I'm a man of mystery," he says. "But to be honest, the decision to hang a nude in the Malibu property is a relatively new one. You might say that inspiration struck me at Blaine's show. Of course, unless I'm able to acquire what I want, the wall will stay bare."

He's looking hard at me as he speaks, and though his tone sounds perfectly conversational, I can't help the s.h.i.+ver of awareness that tingles up my spine.

"Did you have some portfolio pages you wanted to show me?" I ask, forcing my voice to stay cool and businesslike. "If not, I should be going. I'd like to enjoy my Sat.u.r.day."

"I'd be happy to suggest some very engaging activities," he says.

I keep my lips pressed together, and Damien laughs. "Ms. Fairchild. How your thoughts do wander...."

I flush and have to force myself not to snap out a curse.

"Come on in," he says, his voice still light with humor. He heads toward the pa.s.sage leading into the main section of the apartment. "I'll make you a drink and we can talk."

I hesitate, wanting to tell him we can park ourselves on the bench right there and chat about whatever pictures he wants. But I'm curious. I want to see where he lives-one of the places, anyway. And so I allow him to lead me into a stunning living room filled with contemporary furniture. Steel and leather, but highlighted with enough pillows and lamps and pottery to make it seem warm and inviting.

The most stunning feature is the wall of windows, beyond which stretches an urban panorama.

Damien nods to a wet bar that occupies a corner of the room. I follow him and sit on a bar stool, my back to the window. The placement of the stool in proximity to the window makes it seem as though I'm floating in s.p.a.ce. It's exhilarating, though I have to wonder if it wouldn't be a bit unnerving after a few drinks.

"I like your smile," Damien says as he steps behind the bar. "What are you thinking about?"

I tell him, and he laughs.

"I've never thought about it," he admits. "But I promise to keep you fully tethered to me. No sailing into s.p.a.ce." His grin turns wicked. "Not unless it's me who's sending you there."

Oh my. I squirm a little on my stool, thinking that maybe I should have insisted we stay in the foyer.

"Wine?" he asks.

I tilt my head. "I'd prefer bourbon."

"Would you?"

I lift a shoulder in a casual shrug. "My mother used to pound into my head that a proper lady only drinks wine or feminine mixed c.o.c.ktails. Never hard liquor. My grandfather was a whiskey kind of guy."

"I see," he says, and I have the feeling he sees more than I've actually told him. "I think I may have just the thing." He bends down, disappearing beneath the bar. A moment later he appears again, setting the bottle on the bar, pulling down a highball gla.s.s, and pouring me two fingers of liquor without another word.

I take the gla.s.s, a little in shock, because surely I'm not seeing what I think I'm seeing. "Glen Garioch?" I ask, reading the name off the bottle. I take a tentative sip. It's exceptionally smooth with a woody flavor and floral undertones. I close my eyes to savor it, and take another sip. "What year is this?" I finally ask, fearing I already know the answer.

"Nineteen fifty-eight," he says nonchalantly. "Excellent, isn't it?"

"Nineteen fifty-eight? Are you serious?" This whiskey was my grandfather's idea of the holy grail. Only three hundred fifty bottles of the Highland whiskey were put out onto the market, and I happen to know that a single bottle retails at about twenty-six hundred dollars. And here I am, drinking it on a Sat.u.r.day afternoon without a trumpet or a big band or a press release to mark the occasion.

"You're familiar with this particular label?"

"Yeah," I say. "Basically we're drinking gold."

"Why would I offer you anything but my best?"

He's poured himself a gla.s.s as well, and now he walks around the bar. I think he's going to sit on the stool next to me, but he doesn't. He simply leans against it, which means that he's a few inches closer to me ... and between Damien Stark and me, inches can be dangerous.

I tell myself it's to quell my nerves and take another sip, then wait for Damien to say something else. He's quiet, though, watching me. I begin to feel a bit self-conscious under his unabashed inspection.

"You're staring," I finally say.

"You're beautiful."

I look away. It's not what I want to hear. "I'm not," I say. "Or maybe I am. Does it matter?"

"Sometimes," he says, which is the most honest answer I've ever heard to that particular question. "It matters to me."

"Why?"

"Because I like looking at you. I like the way you hold your shoulders back. The way you walk as if the world is yours for the taking."

I shake my head a little. "That's just years of walking with a book on my head, and lectures from my mother, and endless etiquette cla.s.ses."

"It's more than that. I like the way you wear your clothes, as if you understand that it's you and not the cloth that matters. You are beautiful, Nikki, but it's because of what you exude as much as it is the standard of beauty that we see in pageants and on magazine covers."

"What if everything you see in me is a lie?"

"It's not," he says.

I take a slug of my whiskey. "Maybe you're not as smart as you think you are, Mr. Stark."

"Nonsense. I'm f.u.c.king brilliant. Or haven't you heard?" His grin is wide and boyish and I can't help but laugh. And then, before I even have time to catch my breath, the boyish expression is gone, replaced with one of fire and need. He moves fast, and before I can blink he's twisted my bar stool so that my back is to the bar and he has a hand on either side of me. I'm caged in, trapped in Damien's heat. "I am smart, Nikki," he says. "I'm smart enough to know that you feel it, too. This isn't just heat, it's a G.o.dd.a.m.ned conflagration. Not chemistry, but nuclear fission."

I'm flushed and breathing hard. He's right-so help me, he's right. But even so ...

"There's nothing good about an atomic reaction," I say. "And the blast destroys everything it touches."

"Bulls.h.i.+t." The word comes out hard. He's right in front of me, and I can feel the anger coming off him in waves. "G.o.ddammit, Nikki, don't do that. Don't play those kind of games with me. Don't make this complicated when it should be so d.a.m.n simple."

"Should be?" I repeat. "What the h.e.l.l does that mean? Nothing is simple. Am I attracted to you? h.e.l.l yes. But you don't even know me."

I stifle a sigh. Sometimes I wonder if I even know myself, or if all those years of being molded by my mother-being told what to eat, what to drink, who to date, when to sleep, and all the other Mommie Dearest bulls.h.i.+t-had sucked Nikki right out of me.

But no. No, I fought to keep the core of myself, even if I do keep it buried deep.

I look fiercely at him. "You don't know me," I repeat.

The intensity with which he looks back at me almost makes me stumble. "But I do."

Something in his voice makes me feel exposed. He has me on edge again, and I look away, not liking the way he seems to be s.h.i.+ning a spotlight on me.

It takes me a moment to gather myself, and when I do, I tilt my head just enough to look up at him. "We're not taking this further, Mr. Stark. Absolutely not."

"I don't accept that." His voice is a low growl that rumbles through me, weakening my resolve.

I don't say a word. I can't seem to form one.

"I liked it," he continues, as he traces his fingertips down the sleeve of my jacket. "You liked it. I'm not seeing a sound basis for cessation, Ms. Fairchild."

I force myself to make a coherent sound. "I like cheesecake, but I only have it rarely. And I know it's bad for me."

"Sometimes bad is good."

"Bulls.h.i.+t. That's what people say to alleviate their own guilt or justify their own weakness. Bad is bad. A is A."

"I didn't realize we were discussing philosophy. Shall I counter with the teachings of Aristippus? He held that pleasure is the highest good." His fingertip traces my collarbone. "And I want to be very, very good with you."

I s.h.i.+ver from his touch, allowing myself one brief moment to savor the pleasure of basking in the glow of Damien Stark. Then I turn away, so that I'm speaking to the air, not to the man. "This isn't going anywhere." My voice is a whisper. My voice is the sound of regret. "It can't."

"Why not?" I hear the gentleness in his voice and wonder how much of myself I've inadvertently revealed.

I don't say a word.

He exhales, and I can feel the frustration rolling off him in waves. "Ultimately, your free will is your own, Ms. Fairchild. As is mine."

"Yours?"

"I'm free to try to convince you otherwise."

The s.p.a.ce between us is so thick that it's a wonder I can breathe the air. "You won't convince me," I say, but not as forcefully as I want. "I have a job with someone you're going to invest with. I've already gone further than I should." I suck in a fortifying breath. "But it has to stop now. I'm not risking my professional reputation any more than I already have."

"Why not work for me?"

The retort is so quick that I can't help but wonder if he's already considered the possibility. "Not happening," I say.

"Give me one reason why not."

"Um, gee, let me see. Maybe because I don't want to be the poster child for s.e.xual hara.s.sment?"

The change in his face is instant and disturbing, and I am left with no doubt that I've angered him. My immediate instinct is to slip off the stool and scoot away, but I remain rooted to the spot. No way am I giving him the satisfaction of backing down.

"Did you feel hara.s.sed last night?"

"No," I admit. As much as I'd like to take the easy way out, I can't lie to him.

I see the relief wash over his face, banis.h.i.+ng the anger. Or was it fear? I'm not sure, and it doesn't matter. Right now, I see only desire.

"I thought about you last night," he says. "Giselle and Bruce will probably never have me out for drinks again. I was terrible company."

"I'm so sorry to have ruined your evening."

"Hardly," he said. "And the ride home-I think that was the first time in my life I wanted a drive to be longer. Me, alone in the back of the limo, surrounded by the scent of you."

He doesn't mention the panties. I wonder if he's found them. And if he hasn't ...

Oh, dear. Who else does he let use that limo?

I feel my cheeks warm, and from the way his eyes crinkle with amus.e.m.e.nt, I know that he's noticed.

"I imagined undressing you," he says, reaching for the top b.u.t.ton on my blouse. He pops it open effortlessly. "I pictured you naked." Pop, another b.u.t.ton. "You're beautiful," he whispers.

With the side of his thumb, he gently strokes the swell of my breast and the lace of my white satin bra.

My breath catches in my throat. I open my mouth to tell him to stop, but no words come out.

His hands find the bra's front clasp, and as efficiently as he unb.u.t.toned my blouse, he's released me from my bra, which hangs limp from my shoulders. His groan is low and needful and desperately arousing. I want nothing more than to close my eyes and surrender, but I can't, I can't- "Damien, please."

He lifts his eyes to mine. He's breathing hard, and there's longing in the hard angles of his face. "Free will, Nikki. Tell me to stop, and I will. But tell me fast, because I'm going to kiss that d.a.m.nable mouth of yours, and G.o.ddammit, Nikki, I'm doing it to keep you quiet."

Faster than I can react, his mouth covers mine. Claiming me, marking me. Making me his. My mind goes blank, all thoughts dissolving, replaced only by pleasure and the need to be claimed by this man. To open my mouth and take and be taken.

Blindly, I grope for him, my fingers clutching at his hair, pulling him closer. It's as if all my protestations have been nothing but a sham, and now that they've been beaten aside, the pressure of emotion-of need-that's been building inside me has to burst out, wild and hot and desperate and demanding. The kiss lasts either seconds or an eternity, I'm not sure. But when he releases me, I suck in air, craving oxygen because I am light-headed and weak.

This is my chance, and I know it. Tell him to stop now, and he will. Tell him to leave me alone, and he'll walk out of my life.

I throw myself at him. Wanton. Willful. I'm risking everything, but right then I don't care. All I can feel is the fire.

Our mouths clash as I draw him in, and he's right there, tasting me, his low moan of pleasure making all my risks worthwhile.

He breaks our kiss roughly, then closes his mouth on my neck. I gasp and arch back, and as I do, his hands slide into my s.h.i.+rt, cupping my b.r.e.a.s.t.s, and then his mouth is there, suckling, drawing me in until my nipple is a tight pearl against his teeth. I realize he's tugged me closer, so that my a.s.s is barely on the bar stool and his thigh is wedged between my legs. I'm bucking against him because the pleasure has shot like a hot spark from my breast to my s.e.x.

"Baby," he whispers, as he comes up for air. His fingers quickly finish unb.u.t.toning my s.h.i.+rt, and his hands ease down to my waist, leaving my skin hot and p.r.i.c.kly in his wake. He slides me off the stool so that I am standing in front of him. I'm damp from the heat of my desire, and my body aches all over, craving his touch.

"So soft," he says, as he untucks my s.h.i.+rt and brushes his fingers lightly over my skin. His fingers skim around the waistband of my skirt, then slowly unzips it. It falls a bit, hanging loose around my hips. "So d.a.m.n beautiful."

The awe in his voice unnerves me, and cold fingers of trepidation creep in beneath the fog of pleasure.

I tremble, not sure if it's from my fears or from his touch. "Reach back," he orders. "Hold on to the stool."

"Damien ..." I hear the protest in my trailing voice, but my actions don't match my words. I do as he says, my hands clutched tight, my back arched, my head tilted back with pleasure.

He opens my blouse fully, so that the thin material hangs limply on either side of me, and I feel the gentle flutter of the edges against my bare flesh. He brushes his mouth over my nipples, and I groan, wanting to feel him suckle me, but he's only teasing, and with each soft, feathertouch of a kiss upon my nipple, I feel my s.e.x tighten and throb. I want him-I want him desperately. And yet I don't. And all I can do is hold tight to the stool and try to ride out the storm, afraid all the while that I will shatter and break.

"Did you know you glow?" he asks. He is trailing kisses down my cleavage, to my belly, to the waistline of my skirt. I tense, afraid he's going to slide the skirt the rest of the way down over my hips and leave me exposed in the tiny bikini panties I put on that morning.

He doesn't, though, and I glory in the brief reprieve. Instead, he pulls me roughly to him, then s.h.i.+fts our positions, so that he is the one leaning against the bar, and I am in front of him. "Turn around," he says roughly, but doesn't wait for me to comply. Instead he turns me, and I feel his mouth tug at my earlobe even as one of his hands closes over my naked breast.