Adam's Daughter Part 53

He stood there for a moment, wavering with fatigue. He looked around the room. He saw Helen hovering outside the doorway, her eyes wide with alarm. He took a step to leave.

Arthur rose quickly. "Garrett, stay, please. We'll talk about this. You'll --"

"No, I'm going back. I'm going home," he said.

He left, walking by Helen without a word, and without looking back at Arthur, standing alone in the sun room.

CHAPTER SEVENTY-EIGHT.

On Monday morning, Kellen received the final papers from Ian. She had already spoken to Josh who had explained that Tyler's consent made it binding and that she had no legal recourse. But she had waited until now to call Stephen in San Mateo. She told him what had happened, and for a long time the phone was silent, so great was Stephen's shock.

"There's got to be something we can do," he said.

"There's nothing you or anyone can do, Stephen."

"Have you talked to Tyler?"

"I can't find him," Kellen said. "There's been no answer at his house for days. I haven't seen him in a month." She had also tried to reach J.D., with no success.

"Stephen, I don't know what's going to happen next," she said, her voice wavering. "Ian's lawyer sent a letter saying that after tomorrow I'm not allowed in the office." She paused. "I've got to get to the paper. I've got to tell everyone before they hear it from somewhere else."

"I'll be there as soon as I can," Stephen said.

Kellen got to the Times building just before ten and went quickly upstairs to the city room. When she stepped off the elevator, she froze. A large crowd was gathered around the bulletin board and she knew that somehow the news had gotten out. She made her way to the managing editor's office. Ray looked up at her vacantly.

"They know, don't they," she said.

"The wire services got it. Someone put it on the bulletin board a few minutes ago." He motioned her in and shut the door. Kellen dropped into a chair.

"Ray, I'm sorry. I wanted to be the one to tell you and everyone."

Ray shrugged despondently. "You want a drink?" He reached behind his desk to a mini-refrigerator and pulled out a can of diet soda. "Too bad I don't stock some hard stuff, for real catastrophes," he said.

Kellen looked out through the windows. People were milling around with stunned looks on their faces or talking in quiet knots. All work had stopped. She turned back to Ray. "You know I didn't want this to happen."

He nodded. "I know it was Ian's doing. All of us old-timers know you were on our side. And we were on yours, too."

Kellen glanced back at the crowd outside. "I've got to talk to them," she said, rising. "Help me get them together."

She went out into the newsroom, Ray trailing behind. He made an announcement and soon everyone had gathered around the main copy desk. Kellen stood before them, just as she had four months ago to explain the morning conversion plan. Then, she had confronted them with confidence and optimism. Now, she was numb with defeat. She glanced around at the stunned faces, feeling their fear and confusion. Suddenly, she had no idea of what to say. Only two words came into her head.

"I'm sorry," she said quietly.

She paused, no other words coming to her. There was no sound except the efficient tapping away of the wire machines and a phone ringing.

"I'm sorry," she said. "I betrayed your trust and I owe you all an apology."

Her throat constricted, and she blinked rapidly to fight off the tears. She couldn't break down. She had to leave them with something hopeful, something positive. She spotted Clark standing in the back of the crowd. He looked as shocked as anyone, but he smiled slightly and gave her a half-hearted thumbs-up sign. She took a deep breath, which gave her the second of control she needed.

"I know what a shock this is," she said. "I know you're all worried about what will happen to you, what will happen to the Times." She paused. "I wish I could tell you. But I don't know." She stopped again, afraid her voice would not hold. "I do know, however, that you are the finest group of people anyone could ask for and I've been proud to work with you. You put out a h.e.l.l of a newspaper. A great newspaper. No one can take that away."

She paused again as the faces before her began to blur through her tears. "For that," she said softly, "you'll always have my sincerest grat.i.tude."

With a last look at Clark, she turned and went quickly to the elevator. When the doors closed, shutting off the newsroom, she leaned against the wall, the tears falling silently down her face.

No, she thought, not here. Do your crying at home. No one needs to see your tears right now.

She wiped her eyes and pushed a b.u.t.ton. The elevator took her to the top floor. She went slowly down the quiet, wood-paneled hallway. Adele rose slowly when she saw Kellen.

"Kellen, I just heard," she said, her voice breaking.

"It's all right, Adele," Kellen said. "I'm sure there will still be a place for you here."

"But it won't be the same," the woman said, beginning to cry. "I worked for your father for twenty years. And now ..."

"Everything will be all right," Kellen said softly. She walked away quickly, not trusting her own composure. She went to her office and opened the door.

She froze. Lilith was standing there, behind Kellen's desk, and turned. Kellen stared at Lilith and at first didn't notice the strange man in a suit standing at the window, holding a yellow tape measure across the window.

"What are you doing here?" Kellen demanded.

Lilith smiled. "Just taking some measurements for new draperies. We'll be finished in a moment."

"Get out," Kellen said.

Lilith turned to the man. "Wait for me outside, Paul. I'll only be a minute." He left, and Lilith turned to Kellen. "You don't have to worry about your things, dear," she said. "We'll box them up for you and send them to the house."

She picked up a plaque, one of Adam's that Kellen had salvaged from Ian's office. "Of course, you probably don't want all this tacky bric-a-brac."

"Put it down," Kellen said.

Lilith set the plaque down. She walked slowly toward the windows, her eyes wandering over the walls and furnis.h.i.+ngs.

"Get out of my office, Lilith," Kellen said.

"This isn't your office anymore," Lilith said, looking out the window. "Actually, Ian and I were thinking of turning it back into a conference room. Unless, of course, Mr. Richardson wants to use it."

"Until tomorrow this is my office. And my newspaper," Kellen said. "Now get the h.e.l.l out before I have you thrown out. You have no right to be here."

Age had left Lilith diminished, eroding her once formidable presence. But now, as she stared at Kellen, her dark eyes still had a malevolent power. "I have every right to be here," she said. "This newspaper belonged to my father. Adam stole it from him."

"The Times would have died if it weren't for my father," Kellen said. "He saved it."

Lilith shook her head. "Oh, Kellen. I thought after all these years you'd finally given up this hero wors.h.i.+p of yours. It's quite unnatural, you know. Maybe you should try a.n.a.lysis. I can give you the name of a good doctor."

"Get out," Kellen said.

Lilith ignored her, moving back to the desk. She sat down. "Shall I tell you the truth about your father? Shall I tell you what kind of man he really was?" She paused. "He was a cold, ruthless b.a.s.t.a.r.d who used people to get what he wanted. He worked his way into my father's trust so he could steal his newspaper. He married me..." She paused, c.o.c.king her head to one side, like a bird. "Because I was part of the deal. And he wanted me to produce his sons."

She paused. "He had no use for women, you see. They were nothing but wombs or wh.o.r.es to him. Look at what he did to your own mother. She gave him all her money but she couldn't give him what he really wanted -- more sons."

She shook her head. "He obviously drove the poor woman mad. And that made it rather sticky for him. He couldn't just divorce her. So he just, well, did away with her."

The pent-up emotion of the morning suddenly spilled out of Kellen and she began to cry. "Get out!" she shouted.

Lilith rose and went to the door. She turned back to Kellen. "I'm only taking back what's mine," she said.

She left, leaving Kellen standing alone in the middle of the quiet office. For a few minutes, she didn't move as she struggled to control herself. She scanned the office and the memories crowded around her. Memories of her father in the full flush of his power. Memories of the newsroom, the people, of the closeness she and Stephen had shared in the early days. Now, with the simple act of signing a piece of paper, it was over.

She went to her desk and began to gather up papers. She picked up files and doc.u.ments haphazardly, slipping them into her briefcase. Then she paused, realizing suddenly she no longer had use for any of it. None of the work needed her attention anymore. She glanced around and finally took a few of Adam's plaques off the wall and put them into her briefcase. To that, she added the photographs of the children and the one of her mother and father. She closed the briefcase.

At the last moment, she picked up a copy of that day's Times and glanced at the headlines. Juan Carlos was calling for unity in Spain after the death of Francisco Franco. Squeaky Fromme had been found guilty of the attempted a.s.sa.s.sination of President Ford. And California Governor Ronald Reagan had announced he would run for president. The Reagan story had been given second billing to Juan Carlos.

Misplayed, Kellen thought idly, I'll have to talk to Stephen about that. She paused, realizing that, too, was over.

She stuck the paper under her arm and picked up her briefcase. With one last look around, she left the office.

Outside, she paused at Adele's desk to pick up a pile of messages. There were three from Garrett in New York. She stared at his number for a moment then crumpled them up and tossed them in the trash. She glanced at Ian's office.

"Is he in?" she asked.

"No," Adele answered. "He left about two hours ago. He said he'd be at his home in Hawaii for three days."

Kellen shook her head. A rudderless s.h.i.+p, she thought. She looked back at Adele. "It's been good working with you all these years, Adele," she said softly.

"I'll miss you, Kellen," Adele said.

They embraced and Kellen pulled away for fear she, too, would start crying. "Goodbye," she managed and turned quickly and went down the long hall to the elevator.

CHAPTER SEVENTY-NINE.

That evening, at home, Kellen sat alone in the study. The house was quiet. She had dismissed the servants and sent Sara and Ben over to Josh and Anna's to stay overnight. As she sat in the dim light of the study her mind was blank, her emotions spent. She felt only a deep fatigue and a great emptiness.

The mantel clock chimed nine times. She glanced at the telephone, thinking about calling Stephen. He had called earlier in the day, offering to come by the house. But she had told him she wanted to be alone. Now, in her loneliness and despair, she was thinking again of turning to him.

No, don't do it, she thought. Don't use him again. It's not him you really want right now.

She heard the sound of the front door being unlocked and sat up in the chair. She heard soft voices in the foyer and wondered if it was Stephen. A tall figure appeared at the door, silhouetted in the foyer light.

It was Tyler. He just stood there, as if waiting for an invitation.

"So, you finally decided to show up," she said, with more weariness than anger.

Tyler came tentatively into the room. "I wanted to talk to you," he said. "To try to explain."

"It's a little late, don't you think?" Out of the corner of her eye, she saw another figure hovering in the doorway. It was J.D., who looked extremely ill at ease.

"Wait for me in the living room, will you, J.D.?" Tyler asked. J.D. left and Tyler turned to Kellen. He s.h.i.+fted uneasily from foot to foot.

"Where have you been?" she asked flatly. "I tried to reach you."

"I know. I didn't want to face you." He wouldn't even look up at her now. "I'm sorry, Kellen," he whispered. "I had to do it."

"Oh, Tyler, please. Don't try to tell me that."

He came over to the desk. "You've got to understand. Ian made me do it. He found out about J.D. and me. He threatened me. He, he showed me these, these...pictures." Tyler paused. "I didn't care about myself but he said he'd ruin J. D.'s career."

The words spilled out, tumbling over each other. "I didn't want to do it, Kellen but I kept thinking about J.D., how it was my fault. That just because he loved me, he was going to pay for it." His voice wavered. "I didn't even tell J.D. what was going on. He didn't find out until the sale was done. He knew something was bothering me and forced it out of me."

He looked at Kellen, pleadingly. "G.o.d, I'm sorry, Kellen. I should have come to you first. But I was scared."

Kellen finally looked up at Tyler. He was distraught, fighting to stay in control.

"I'm sorry," he repeated. "I didn't want to lose him, Kellen. You've got to understand that. I didn't want to lose everything, everything I --"

"Lose everything?" Kellen said. "Tyler, don't you see what you've cost me? I've lost the newspapers."

"But you've still got Stephen and the kids," Tyler said. "You've got a family, someone to love you. Please don't blame me because I wanted that, too."

"Stephen's left me," she said. "We've separated."

Tyler's face registered his shock. "G.o.d, I'm sorry, Kellen," he said.

There was a noise at the door and they both turned to see J.D. He had obviously heard most of their conversation and he looked embarra.s.sed and disconsolate.

"Kellen, can I say something?" he asked softly. She nodded, and he came into the room. "I feel like I'm the one who should apologize," he said. "When I found out what Tyler had done I told him we had to talk to you." He paused. "I know what kind of sacrifice has been made. I just wish I had known beforehand so I could have stopped it. I hope you believe that."

Kellen looked at J.D. and at Tyler, whose eyes were bright with tears. She realized suddenly how overwrought he looked, as if he were on the verge of emotional collapse. She rose wearily.

"It's late," she said softly. "I'm going to bed."

She started past Tyler then paused, placing a hand gently on his arm. She looked at J.D. "It's a long drive home. You're both welcome to stay," she said.

Her eyes locked on Tyler's for a moment. "Really, you are."

She went to the door and looked up the staircase, at the procession of carved faces in the bal.u.s.trade leading up to the darkened rooms.