Crazy For The Storm Part 2

I will never defy Nick again.

I will never defy Nick again, I said.

He drew his upper body back and his wrists went limp and he stared off into the distance.

Get off so I can change the channel, I said.

Nick looked down over his nose and his eyes focused far beyond as if some apparition could be seen deep in the rug. I wasn't going to wait for him to get up and I twisted away. My shorts slid off my waist and my raspberried hip caught his attention. His eyes flared open.

I quickly pulled up my shorts, avoiding eye contact, and turned the channel to the Watergate special.

There, I said. Should I do the dishes?

Well that's nice of you, Norman, said my mom.

Then you guys can watch the special, I said.

Nick was still on his knees, arms hanging down, head tilted forward. He didn't turn or move or speak. All I saw was his back inhaling and exhaling. I went to the kitchen and began soaping the dishes. I could hear Nixon and the other bad guys denying they had anything to do with the break-in. Suddenly Nick's voice cut through the TV noise-skateboarding was the only word that was clear. Then I heard the investigators talking about what was really going on in the White House at the time-the cover-up. Nick didn't call me into the living room and his voice never cut through the sound of the TV again so I figured I was okay. By the end of the dishes Nixon was giving his Checkers speech and some secret tapes were playing. was the only word that was clear. Then I heard the investigators talking about what was really going on in the White House at the time-the cover-up. Nick didn't call me into the living room and his voice never cut through the sound of the TV again so I figured I was okay. By the end of the dishes Nixon was giving his Checkers speech and some secret tapes were playing.

Nick lit up a joint and stared at the TV screen with hatred. He took off his s.h.i.+rt. I walked in front of the screen. Watergate Watergate blah blah blah, I said. I'm so sick of Watergate.

Nick blinked as if trying to focus on my foreground image.

You have no f.u.c.king idea, he said.

About what? I said.

He rocked out of the chair, suddenly enraged. You know why you you of all people need to watch this? of all people need to watch this?

My face was even with his bare stomach. The air in the room had changed. It closed in all around me.

I'm going to bed, I said.

As I turned he grabbed my arm and his fingers dug into my bone.

Ouch! I said. You're hurting me.

d.a.m.n f.u.c.king right. Now answer the question.

What's the question?

Why do you you of all people need to be watching the downfall of the president of the United States? of all people need to be watching the downfall of the president of the United States?

I already watched it a couple years ago, I said.

Well you need to watch it again. Do you know why?

No, I said.

Did you hear that, Jan? I bet you don't know why either.

My mom was putting away the chicken. She walked under the archway between the kitchen and the living room and stopped.

Don't know what? she said.

Pay f.u.c.king attention. That's the problem. You never pay attention.

My mom put a hand on her hip and looked at Nick. She lifted her eyebrows and sighed. His fingers bore deeper into my bone and the pain made me cry out.

Let go of him, said my mom.

You'd like that, wouldn't you? But you know why I can't? he said, seemingly to both of us.

Why? she said, rolling her eyes.

Because if I let him go now he'll end up like Nixon.

Oh come on, said my mom. What the h.e.l.l are you going on about?

He's a liar!

I didn't see him skateboarding, she said. Did you?

So you believe him?

She looked at me and I tried to warn her with my eyes but I was still cringing from the pain in my arm.

Yes, she said.

Nick ripped down my pants and the waistline tore the scab and fresh blood percolated to the surface of my wound.

What about this? said Nick, pointing at my raspberry.

Oh G.o.d, said my mom. Where did you get that?

I wanted to be on her side. I wanted her to win.

I got it when I slipped in the canyon, I said.

Bulls.h.i.+t, said Nick. Look at the blacktop around the edges.

That's dirt, I said.

Nick rubbed his fingers over the black smudges. Ouch, I said.

Stop that, Nick, said my mom.

He held up his fingers.

It ain't dirt.

Yes it is, I said.

Nick pointed at the TV. You sound just like Nixon, he said. It comes so naturally.

I recalled Nixon's voice, cracked and high-pitched during his Checkers speech. Nixon had a fake smile. A warped frown. No one on the beach liked him. My dad grunted and cast him off with the wave of his hand-not even worth talking about.

Then Nick let go of my arm and I ran into the kitchen.

Come back here, he yelled.

Leave him alone, said my mom.

Get your a.s.s back here, said Nick.

I ducked into the bathroom and peed into the toilet. I heard Nick arguing with my mom about me forgetting to take out the trash cans again, for the second week in a row. It was proof, he said, that Norman believes the world revolves around him Norman believes the world revolves around him.

I came out of the bathroom and my mom was face to face with Nick.

You're overreacting, she said to his perspiring face.

Horses.h.i.+t, he said and marched past her and into the bathroom and I knew I was busted before he even said it.

He forgot to flush the G.o.dd.a.m.n toilet again, barked Nick. This is at least the tenth time, Jan.

Nick stepped out of the bathroom and called me over. You need to clean the toilet bowl. That's the only way you're going to learn.

My mom stepped between him and me.

Get the f.u.c.k out of the way, said Nick, his eyes cutting hard down at my mom. She shook her head, making a stand.

Nick might do any crazy thing, I thought. He had broken our neighbor Wheeler's ribs one night in our kitchen after a heated political debate.

I skulked into the bathroom.

It always starts when you're young, Nick said. You lie a little, cheat a little. And then all of a sudden that's your mentality. That's who you are.

Nick, said my mom. You used to lie your a.s.s off when you were a kid. That's why you got kicked out of grammar schools and high schools and military schools. So don't act like Norman's got the problem, Nick.

Nick slumped against the door jam like an animal backed into a corner. He was a hairline trigger away from exploding. Don't do or say anything Mom, I thought to myself.

She swung her hip out to the opposite side.

You think you're right because you're drunk and stoned, she said. But you're wrong.

The word wrong wrong seemed to prod Nick from deep down, and whatever it unleashed crawled up his neck and his veins popped out and the thing continued into his face turning it purple-red and wound his eyes up like a cartoon character. It wasn't funny though, and I stopped breathing. seemed to prod Nick from deep down, and whatever it unleashed crawled up his neck and his veins popped out and the thing continued into his face turning it purple-red and wound his eyes up like a cartoon character. It wasn't funny though, and I stopped breathing.

His jaw set and his front teeth sawed together.

I'm the f.u.c.king truth, he said, grinding up the words. And you two are f.u.c.king lies.

He stared at me, red-faced, veined and perspiring.

I can't let you grow up to be a liar. A failure. I have to stop it. There must be consequences.

He stepped past me and pulled out a jar of Ajax and a sponge from under the sink and handed them to me.

Scrub the toilet bowl, he said.

I looked at my mom standing in the kitchen with her hand still on her hip. She shook her head, but I was afraid to defy him. I dumped the Ajax into the toilet bowl.

You don't have to, said my mom.

Your mother doesn't care about you, Norman, he said. She wants you to be a liar and a failure. Do you understand that? She's too lazy to stop you.

Shut up, Nick, she said. Norman's not a liar. You are, Nick. You are!

His body tensed as if jolted by electricity.

You know I'm right, he said.

Nick looked down at me. You know I'm right, he repeated.

He may be drunk and stoned, I thought. He may be crazy. But he was right-I had lied.

I held the sponge and Ajax and my mom looked at me, half eclipsed by Nick's stomach. She shook her head. It wasn't clear whether she was signaling for me not to scrub the toilet or whether she was just disgusted with the whole situation, or both.

The hair on his stomach was inches from my face and he smelled like sour milk.

You'll wake up one day and realize the world does not revolve around you and it will be too late, he said. You'll be too old to change. You'll end up bitter and frustrated for the rest of your life. Save yourself, Norman, he said. Because your mother can't.

My mom scoffed. She either didn't know or didn't care that I had lied, and this ambiguity created a void inside me, a s.p.a.ce for Nick's demons to take root.

I began scrubbing.

You don't have to do that, said my mom.

He knows I'm right, said Nick.

You're a joke, said my mom.

I kept scrubbing and then I heard Nick's rocking chair creak. I heard my mom march into the living room and they started yelling at each other. I wished I could yell too-better than just shrinking up like a bug.

He called her a c.u.n.t. She said he wouldn't know what to do with one if it fell in his lap. Then I heard the sound of meat and bone colliding. A second later a dull thump against the floor. I dropped the sponge and ran into the living room.

My mom was on the floor. She held both hands over one eye. She whimpered like a child, curled and fetal. Nick stood over her. He moved his feet like a nervous horse. I got between Nick and my mom.

You're a bully, I said.