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Seven
Carlo looked at his daughter a long time before responding to the astonis.h.i.+ng thing she'd just said. He knew that she was not like any other child, male or female, he'd ever known. But this newest conceit of hers left him quite speechless. astonis.h.i.+ng thing she'd just said. He knew that she was not like any other child, male or female, he'd ever known. But this newest conceit of hers left him quite speechless.
She spoke when he said nothing. "There are female scholars in the town."
"Are there?" Carlo looked thoughtful. "Are you sure?"
Alessandra was longing to say yes, of course she was sure-but, in truth, she didn't know. Now that she thought about it, the few female scholars she'd ever read about had all been high-ranking nuns from n.o.ble families, or n.o.blewomen who were tutored at home. "Females, I believe, can attend lectures if they so desire. At least, I have never heard any injunction against it." Her voice trailed off into uncertainty.
"And medicine, child! What man would surrender his pulse and his urine to a female physician?"
"I want to study the workings of the body, Father-not to wear the red gloves and attend the ill."
"Will you learn only from books, then? Because I can and will procure whatever books you want, and you can study them here at your leisure...." He gestured around the warm and cozy room with its bed as commodious as a throne, well padded with embroidered pillows and hung about with curtains, now pulled back to let in the light. "In the safety and tranquillity of your own home."
Alessandra looked around her room, taking in all her father had done to make it a whole world for her since her stepmother had clipped her wings, keeping her imprisoned here as surely as the finches in their wicker cage. "I want to study as Aristotle says men should study."
"Men, Alessandra, not girls."
"It's true the old Stagirite has nothing kind to say about the intellectual capacity of females. But I am living proof that he was biased in his view!"
Carlo thought how proud his daughter was-how proud and pretty and, he had to admit, correct in her opinion. She had all the capacity required to pursue any of the seven liberal arts: grammar, logic, rhetoric, arithmetic, geometry, music, or even astronomy. Nicco, for all his lovable manly bl.u.s.ter, was as a lowly apprentice, not even worthy of holding a candle to his sister's intellectual pursuits. She was a natural scholar and an original thinker. Was it not but an unhappy accident that she was born a girl?
And yet she was a girl, and what she asked for was against every law of man and Nature. "Wouldn't music be better suited to you, Alessandra? Both the study of music and the study of medicine are concerned, after all, with achieving harmony."
"And yet they are as different as an angel is from a living creature, Papa! I want to study the body itself and learn the secrets of how it works-of everything that's hidden beneath the flesh. To learn, as Aristotle teaches us to do, by observation."
"Alessandra, you have been shut up in this room too long-you need fresh air!"
"There is a doctor who teaches at the University of Bologna. He chooses a.s.sistants from among the best students in the medical school. I know you've heard of him-his little book has been much in demand for copying since its publication last year."
"Anatomia?"
"The very one! Mondino de' Liuzzi. Our Giorgio did some of the pictures for him. Each illuminator was sworn to secrecy, as they used corpses as models-" Alessandra clapped her hand over her mouth, realizing what she'd just done. "You won't tell, Papa, will you? They only use corpses from the gallows or the hospitals, and never the bodies of people from hereabouts."
Carlo was by now weeping. Alessandra stopped herself from saying more, enfolding herself in his arms, as soon as she saw the effect of her words.
"Have I not ever shown you love and kindness, Alessandra, and given you everything you desire?"
"Of course you have, dear Papa!"
"Did I nurture you and coddle and encourage you, only to see you banished from the company of every decent, G.o.d-fearing person? To see you become a s.m.u.t in the eye of G.o.d Himself?"
Alessandra stiffened, hearing an unpleasant echo of her stepmother's diction in her father's words, even as she let herself be held by him. She pushed him gently away and dried her eyes. "New things are being learned all the time-especially now that so many of the ancient texts from the Greeks and the Arabs are more widely accessible-and largely because of you and your brother stationers, Papa!"
"Woe betide me, then!"
Alessandra caught and held his eyes. "Do you never think that if someone, somewhere had bothered to learn and study more, Mother might still be alive today?"
"Oh, my dear child-G.o.d calls us to Him when and how He will."
"And yet you physic me when I have the ague, and Emilia makes Dodo take cod-liver oil, and you have always done your best to keep your children safe and healthy. Is that going against G.o.d's will?"
"Basta, Alessandra-enough!" Carlo held out his palm to keep her from saying more. "You cannot go to Bologna to study medicine. You must not even think about it anymore." Carlo shook his head when she was silent, simply looking at him with those brown eyes of hers that were so like her mother's-eyes filled now with reproach. "Your stepmother will never allow it-and although I am ruler of this family, still it is in my interest to keep my wife in good humor."
"At my expense?"
"How you vex me, Alessandra! What you're asking is unreasonable! No girl of Persiceto has ever gone off to study in Bologna. And females are not permitted to compete for advanced degrees. You would heap shame upon our heads-and even Pierina's chances of marrying well would be compromised."
"It is not fair!"
"It is the way of this world, daughter."
That night, after everyone else in the house was sleeping, Alessandra took her candle and stole into the storeroom, where she took her treasure out of its hiding place, prayed, and kissed the image of her mother's face again and again.
The cold stone of the floor seemed to grow warmer and softer beneath her knees. And in the candlelight, after many Ave Maria Ave Marias, she saw a golden web cast itself like a veil over the face of the Virgin.
Alessandra barely managed to keep the heavy icon in her trembling hands. Was it a sign to her? Her mother's blessing?
She hugged the icon to her breast, crossed herself, and tucked her treasure away again, well hidden beneath her mother's clothes.
Through all that spring, Alessandra uncomplainingly did the household tasks her stepmother a.s.signed to her, and spent the rest of the time propped up in her bed, reading and thinking.
It was a breathtakingly beautiful spring, filled with birdsong and blossoms. Alessandra experienced what she could from Pierina's tales of the world beyond her little room, and basked in the sunlight and fresh air on the way to and from church. She walked slowly, soaking up as much as she could of the sights, sounds, and sweet scents of the outdoors.
Pierina proved to be more than willing to smuggle books or parts of books in progress out of the scriptorium. But as luscious spring turned again to tantalizing summer, she was increasingly annoyed with the obedient lump that seemed to be standing in for her once rebellious, unquenchably adventurous sister.
Pierina shared a room with Dodo now-it was part of Ursula's plan to keep Alessandra untainted by worldly things and thus as grandly marriageable as possible.
Nonetheless, Pierina often slipped into her sister's bed at night, as Dodo kicked and snored and kept her awake.
On one such night, she entered Alessandra's room in the wee hours, surprised to find her sister writing in a little notebook that was visible for but an instant before Alessandra whisked the book under the covers and blew out the candle.
Pierina felt her way in the dark, careful not to bark her s.h.i.+ns on the chest beside Alessandra's bed. She climbed over it and slipped underneath the covers. "What are you writing," she whispered, "at this late hour?"
"Why are you bothering me, moscerino moscerino?"
"And so I'm a gnat now, am I?" Pierina sulked.
"It's hot," said Alessandra. "Move away from me." Pierina was feeling around under the covers for the book. "Get out! Leave me be!"
"I won't!" Pierina turned her back to Alessandra and they lay like that, bottom to bottom. They could hear the whisper of bats flying in and out of the open window, hunting for mosquitoes.
Alessandra turned on her other side and stroked a lock of Pierina's hair aside and then whispered into her ear. "You're a lovable gnat, at any rate."
"I hate you!"
"Hush-don't hate me."
"You hide everything from me now! What's happened to you, Zan-Zan?" Pierina's voice was hoa.r.s.e with anger. "I want my sister back!"
Despite the heat, Alessandra drew Pierina into her arms. "You have me still, moscerino moscerino."
Pierina made Alessandra turn and face her. "Nicco says that you and Papa have some plan afoot. And our stepmother sighs contentedly all the time now, and has called on the silk merchant twice to show her his wares. But Nicco says he's sure you have no intention of marrying, and Giorgio thinks I may be right in thinking you plan to take the veil."
Alessandra felt the sting of being spoken of behind her back by those she'd counted as her allies. It was almost as if she'd left them already. "You know as well as I do of our stepmother's desire to send me away," she began stiffly. "And, of course, as a dutiful daughter, I must-"
Pierina interrupted her. "Say nothing! Say nothing rather than shutting me out again!"
The heat of her words did a good deal to soften Alessandra's resolve. "Oh, little sister-my sweet pest of a little sister! Do you remember our game of Disappearing?"
"I remember that it got us in a great deal of trouble."
"Well, I've refined the rules somewhat-and the game, I'm quite sure, will work better this time. But in case it doesn't, I'm not involving you and Nic. I'm taking the risks, as well I should, entirely upon myself."
"We are a family, Alessandra, and any risk you take upon yourself will redound upon us all."
It annoyed Alessandra that her sister, so often selfish and frivolous, was also sometimes right.
She lay there through much of that night, while Pierina softly snored, and wondered what it was inside her that made her long for an unlit pathway and places that no girl from Persiceto had ever seen before. She knew she would take such a path. But how she would find the means to sustain herself was still a problem that nagged at her, kept her awake, and haunted her dreams when she finally fell asleep.
When the pears and pomegranates hung ripe upon the trees, Ursula gave a banquet in honor of Alessandra's fifteenth name day.
Even though no one would be attending who did not already know Alessandra well, Ursula dressed and coiffed her with the greatest care. She had a gown made out of the blue silk with its crop of seed pearls. The heavy garment felt more like a shroud than a wedding dress to Alessandra when she tried it on.
Ursula spent hours weaving matching blue silk ribbons into Alessandra's hair. It was a bittersweet feeling for her, as she couldn't remember ever having been touched by Ursula with such tenderness or at such great length. Ursula chatted gaily about the banquet and the various delicacies she'd instructed Cook to prepare: roast suckling pig with figs and cinnamon, sausage-stuffed capons, and brandied eels.
She even praised Alessandra when the last ribbon was tied. "You look a perfect picture, cara cara! Worthy of"-Ursula paused meaningfully-"a very rich gentleman indeed!"
Alessandra's papa had a.s.sured her that Ursula was still searching for a son-in-law worthy of her ambitions. "If so, Madame, then this is a sight I'd like to see. May I look in my Lady's mirror?"
"Oh, Zan-Zan," cooed Ursula-and truly the nickname sounded loathsome coming from her, as if it had been spoken by a snake. "Won't you ever call me 'Mother'?"
Alessandra wanted to say "Never!" But she held her tongue and peered silently into the circle of polished bronze Ursula held before her.
There was something new about her face she hadn't seen the last time, perhaps a year ago, that she'd looked into her mother's mirror-for it was her mother's mirror, or had been. The bones of her face seemed better defined than before. She reached up and touched the bone beneath her cheek, the softer bone of her nose-was it bone, or something else? Skulls always had only a hole there.
"You're a lovely young woman now-a fruit that's nearly ripe for plucking. A year in the convent, and then there will not be a virgin in Emilia-Romagna who will command a higher bride-price-or merit a grander bridegroom!" Ursula reached out and pinched both of Alessandra's cheeks hard enough to hurt. "There!" she said, without a hint of cruelty in her voice.
Like a pig, thought Alessandra, thought Alessandra, being primped and fattened and brought to market. being primped and fattened and brought to market.
The bells rang for s.e.xt, twelve peals through the golden, sun-flecked, midday air. "To the window, Alessandra!" Ursula was half pulling and half pus.h.i.+ng her to the largest window, which faced out over the square. "Just so, dear-no, lean on the sill a bit. More to the middle-hurry!"
The sun was warm on Alessandra's cheeks, which were still smarting from being pinched. She heard the sound of horse's hooves clattering on the cobblestones below. "Don't move!" said Ursula before stepping back from the window, but not so far back that she couldn't see out into the square.
Two riders approached at a pretentious gallop-one a gentleman and the other evidently his servant. They pulled up short beneath the window. The gentleman removed his hat and bowed. He was a man about her father's age, and someone Alessandra had never seen before. She kept her face composed, only nodding ever so slightly to answer his bow. And then, leaving a wake of dust shot through with sunlight behind them, the riders galloped away in the direction of Bologna.
Nicco, just coming back from the stables, saw the whole thing and was left brus.h.i.+ng the other riders' dust off his clothes.
"Who's that old git, then?" he called up to Alessandra.
Alessandra, keeping her gaze facing outside, away from Ursula, looked down at Nicco and crossed her eyes.
Nicco wiped the smile off his face when Ursula appeared side by side with Alessandra in the window. He noticed how his sister had grown-perhaps from all that time spent lying in bed: She was just a hand's breadth shorter than Ursula now.
"That, young Niccol," Ursula said magisterially, "is a very wealthy man, owner of two castles and vast tracts of land in a delightfully distant province."
Alessandra turned to her. "May I take this dress off now, Madame?"
Ursula, dismissing Alessandra with a wave of her hand, continued to look out the window.
Nicco called up to her, "You're not planning to give our Alessandra to him?"
"I would, readily enough, but the gentleman already has a wife." Ursula laughed-a thing she did rarely enough. "No, we have promised Alessandra to his only son. Your father has gone to a great deal of trouble over the matter-far more trouble, in my opinion, than was deserved."
Eight
That summer went by quickly for Alessandra, filled as it was with her observations of all that she was about to leave behind. She wanted to spend more time with her siblings than they seemed to have for her suddenly, as if they'd simply accepted the idea that she was leaving for the cloister, and had replaced her already in their hearts and habits. her observations of all that she was about to leave behind. She wanted to spend more time with her siblings than they seemed to have for her suddenly, as if they'd simply accepted the idea that she was leaving for the cloister, and had replaced her already in their hearts and habits.
She couldn't help but notice and feel hurt by Ursula's uncharacteristic good cheer, evidently at the prospect of getting rid of her least favorite stepchild. Alessandra looked, as always, to her father's library for comfort-and wondered if books and learning were to be her sole lifelong companions.
There were two aspects of her plan that especially troubled her, driving her to steal into Ursula's room and look into the polished bronze of her mother's mirror whenever she could do so undetected.