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CHAPTER SEVENTEEN.
THE CANDLE LIT.
There is no more disagreeable sensation in this world than that furnished by a sudden encounter with some one with whom we are on "awkward" terms. Most people know what it is to cross the street to avoid an old friend, or to dodge into a shop in order to escape the necessity of inflicting or receiving the cut direct. Very often the origin of the quarrel has been forgotten or ceased to be of real moment, but the awkwardness endures. Oftener still a reconciliation would be welcomed on both sides; but pride, pride, pride intervenes.
Now the best solvent of stubborn obstinacy is a sense of humour. As Juggernaut stood in the darkness, surveying the embarra.s.sed little figure before him--in his eyes Daphne, five feet seven in her stockings, was always "little"--and feeling acutely conscious on his own part of an irresistible desire to shuffle with his feet, he suddenly and most providentially broke into one of his rare laughs--a laugh of quiet and unforced enjoyment.
Apparently this was not quite what Daphne expected.
"What is the matter?" she inquired. Her voice quavered pathetically, for she was highly wrought.
"I couldn't help thinking," said her husband, "of an episode in the history of two old friends of mine. They had been engaged for about three months, when they quarrelled--severely. They parted company for ever, and whenever he or she saw the other upon the horizon, he or she fled. However, after about six weeks of this sort of thing they were taken by surprise. One day the man saw the girl advancing straight upon him down the street, quite oblivious of his proximity. He dived into the nearest shop, which happened to be a baby-linen establishment--"
Daphne gave a sudden gurgle of laughter.
"--And when the girl walked in, two minutes later," concluded Juggernaut, "to match some silk, she found her late beloved diligently sampling Berlin wool. That did it! The sense of humour of that young couple came to their rescue, Daphne, and they walked out of the shop hand-in-hand, not caring a dump for anybody. To my knowledge they have never had a quarrel since. You see the reason why I laughed just now?"
Daphne sighed comfortably.
"Yes," she said. The tension of the situation was relaxed.
"I want to--to talk to you, Jack," she continued, considerably heartened.
"Certainly," replied Juggernaut, with a slight return of his board-room air. "I'll turn the light on."
"Please don't," said Daphne hastily. "I would rather talk in the dark.
Will you sit down on the settle?"
Juggernaut obeyed silently. The firelight played upon his face, showing the clear-cut lines of his mouth and his tired eyes. Daphne stood erect before him, keeping her face in the shadow. She had removed her hat and furs, and her thick hair caught the light fantastically.
"Jack," she began, industriously scrutinising the vista of the room reflected by an ancient convex mirror hanging on the far wall, "I want to say something. I want to say that I am sorry. I have done you an injustice. I always thought you were a hard man, and I have discovered that you are not. In fact," she continued with a flicker of a smile, "I have found out that you are very much the other thing." She paused.
"May I ask for chapter and verse?" said Juggernaut.
"_Yes!_" The old Daphne flashed forth. "Here are you, fighting all these men with one hand, giving no quarter, and all that sort of thing--" Juggernaut stirred suddenly in his seat--"and feeding the women and children with the other! Aren't you, now?" She pointed an accusing finger.
"Since you tax me with it--yes," said her husband.
Daphne turned upon him impulsively, with the firelight full on her face.
"Jack," she said softly, "it was splendid of you!"
He looked up and saw that her eyes were glowing. She came a step nearer, and her head drooped prettily. "And I'm sorry if I have been unfair to you, Jack," she continued. "I--I thought you were just a feelingless sort of man, whose work was his world, and who cared for nothing but himself and what he had in view, and regarded women as merely useful things to keep house, and have babies, and so on. But now I _know_ that I was wrong. There is more of you than that. Being me, I had to tell you."
She ended with a little catch in her voice. She had made her effort.
She had humbled herself, and in so doing she had laid herself open to the cruellest of rebuffs. She waited tremulously. A hard word, a scornful smile, even silence now--and two lives would fall asunder for ever.
But the wheels of Juggernaut had never pa.s.sed over a woman.
"Will you sit down?" said Sir John gently.
He made room for her, and she sank down beside him, leaning her head against the high back of the settle and gazing unwinkingly into the fire. She was conscious now that this man was overflowing with tenderness towards her, but she would not look him in the face yet.
"How did you find out about the rations to the women?" he enquired presently.
Daphne told him.
"But you mustn't blame Jim Carthew," she said in conclusion. "He simply _had_ to tell me."
"Where did you see him?"
"Last week, in Algiers. In fact, he brought me home; but I made him promise not to tell you I was in London. He _is_ a good sort!" she added irrelevantly.
"In what way?" asked her husband curiously.
Daphne turned and surveyed him.
"Would you be angry if I told you--jealous, I mean?"
"What right have I to be angry or jealous?" said Juggernaut simply.
"In what way," he repeated, "has Carthew been showing that he is a good sort?"
"Well, in bringing me his troubles. That always makes a conquest of any woman, you know. And in letting me take my troubles to him. A woman always _has_ to take a trouble to a man, Jack, when all is said and done--even if he is only the family solicitor!" she concluded hurriedly. She had suddenly skated on to thin ice, and she knew it.
The man to whom she should have taken her troubles had not been there to receive them.
"So Jim Carthew has his troubles like the rest of us?" said Juggernaut.
"Yes, and I never suspected how he felt about them," said Daphne. "He is fearfully reserved about the things he really feels, although he babbles enough about the things he doesn't. So, when I was in trouble----"
"What was your trouble?"
"I was lonely," said the girl.
Juggernaut drew his breath sharply.
"I am glad you had some one to be kind to you," he said.
Then came a long pause--the sort of pause which either brings a discussion to an end or begets another, longer and more intimate. We all know them.
Finally Daphne braced herself.
"Jack," she said, "I want to say something more. I didn't mean to: I have said all I came here to say. But I must say this too--now or never. I--I--I was wrong to marry you, Jack. I didn't love you, but I thought it didn't matter. I felt how divine it would be to be able to help the boys and Dad. That was all I considered. Then, when I began to go about, and meet new people, and make comparisons, I--found myself criticising you! _Me--you!_"
"I wouldn't be too indignant about it if I were you," said her husband.