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"I'm goin' that way, miss. If you like, you can step along with me."
Noel stepped along.
"The streets aren't what they ought to be," the policeman said. "What with the darkness, and the war turning the girls heads--you'd be surprised the number of them that comes out. It's the soldiers, of course."
Noel felt her cheeks burning.
"I daresay you wouldn't have noticed it," the policeman went on: "but this war's a funny thing. The streets are gayer and more crowded at night than I've ever seen them; it's a fair picnic all the time. What we're goin' to settle down to when peace comes, I don't know. I suppose you find it quiet enough up your way, miss?"
"Yes," said Noel; "quite quiet."
"No soldiers up in Bloomsbury. You got anyone in the Army, miss?"
Noel nodded.
"Ah! It's anxious times for ladies. What with the Zeps, and their brothers and all in France, it's 'ara.s.sin'. I've lost a brother meself, and I've got a boy out there in the Garden of Eden; his mother carries on dreadful about him. What we shall think of it when it's all over, I can't tell. These Huns are a wicked tough lot!"
Noel looked at him; a tall man, regular and orderly, with one of those perfectly decent faces so often seen in the London police.
"I'm sorry you've lost someone," she said. "I haven't lost anyone very near, yet."
"Well, let's 'ope you won't, miss. These times make you feel for others, an' that's something. I've noticed a great change in folks you'd never think would feel for anyone. And yet I've seen some wicked things too; we do, in the police. Some of these English wives of aliens, and 'armless little German bakers, an' Austrians, and what-not: they get a crool time. It's their misfortune, not their fault, that's what I think; and the way they get served--well, it makes you ashamed o' bein' English sometimes--it does straight: And the women are the worst. I said to my wife only last night, I said: 'They call themselves Christians,' I said, 'but for all the charity that's in 'em they might as well be Huns.'
She couldn't see it-not she!' Well, why do they drop bombs?' she says.
'What!' I said, 'those English wives and bakers drop bombs? Don't be silly,' I said. 'They're as innocent as we.' It's the innocent that gets punished for the guilty. 'But they're all spies,' she says. 'Oh!' I said, 'old lady! Now really! At your time of life!' But there it is; you can't get a woman to see reason. It's readin' the papers. I often think they must be written by women--beggin' your pardon, miss--but reely, the 'ysterics and the 'atred--they're a fair knockout. D'you find much hatred in your household, miss?"
Noel shook her head. "No; my father's a clergyman, you see."
"Ah!" said the policeman. And in the glance he bestowed on her could be seen an added respect.
"Of course," he went on, "you're bound to have a sense of justice against these Huns; some of their ways of goin' on have been above the limit. But what I always think is--of course I don't say these things--no use to make yourself unpopular--but to meself I often think: Take 'em man for man, and you'd find 'em much the same as we are, I daresay. It's the vicious way they're brought up, of actin' in the ma.s.s, that's made 'em such a crool lot. I see a good bit of crowds in my profession, and I've a very low opinion of them. Crowds are the most blunderin' blighted things that ever was. They're like an angry woman with a bandage over her eyes, an' you can't have anything more dangerous than that. These Germans, it seems, are always in a crowd. They get a state o' mind read out to them by Bill Kaser and all that b.l.o.o.d.y-minded lot, an' they never stop to think for themselves."
"I suppose they'd be shot if they did," said Noel.
"Well, there is that," said the policeman reflectively. "They've brought discipline to an 'igh pitch, no doubt. An' if you ask me,"--he lowered his voice till it was almost lost in his chin-strap, "we'll be runnin'
'em a good second 'ere, before long. The things we 'ave to protect now are gettin' beyond a joke. There's the City against lights, there's the streets against darkness, there's the aliens, there's the aliens' shops, there's the Belgians, there's the British wives, there's the soldiers against the women, there's the women against the soldiers, there's the Peace Party, there's 'orses against croolty, there's a Cabinet Minister every now an' then; and now we've got these Conchies. And, mind you, they haven't raised our pay; no war wages in the police. So far as I can see, there's only one good result of the war--the burglaries are off.
But there again, you wait a bit and see if we don't have a prize crop of 'm, or my name's not 'Arris."
"You must have an awfully exciting life!" said Noel.
The policeman looked down at her sideways, without lowering his face, as only a policeman can, and said indulgently:
"We're used to it, you see; there's no excitement in what you're used to. They find that in the trenches, I'm told. Take our seamen--there's lots of 'em been blown up over and over again, and there they go and sign on again next day. That's where the Germans make their mistake!
England in war-time! I think a lot, you know, on my go; you can't 'elp it--the mind will work--an' the more I think, the more I see the fightin' spirit in the people. We don't make a fuss about it like Bill Kaser. But you watch a little shopman, one o' those fellows who's had his house bombed; you watch the way he looks at the mess--sort of disgusted. You watch his face, and you see he's got his teeth into it.
You watch one of our Tommies on 'is crutches, with the sweat pourin' off his forehead an' 'is eyes all strainy, stumpin' along--that gives you an idea! I pity these Peace fellows, reely I pity them; they don't know what they're up against. I expect there's times when you wish you was a man, don't you, miss? I'm sure there's times when I feel I'd like to go in the trenches. That's the worst o' my job; you can't be a human bein'--not in the full sense of the word. You mustn't let your pa.s.sions rise, you mustn't drink, you mustn't talk; it's a narrow walk o' life.
Well, here you are, miss; your Square's the next turnin' to the right.
Good night and thank you for your conversation."
Noel held out her hand. "Good night!" she said.
The policeman took her hand with a queer, flattered embarra.s.sment.
"Good night, miss," he said again. "I see you've got a trouble; and I'm sure I hope it'll turn out for the best."
Noel gave his huge hand a squeeze; her eyes had filled with tears, and she turned quickly up towards the Square, where a dark figure was coming towards her, in whom she recognised her father. His face was worn and hara.s.sed; he walked irresolutely, like a man who has lost something.
"Nollie!" he said. "Thank G.o.d!" In his voice was an infinite relief. "My child, where have you been?"
"It's all right, Daddy. Cyril has just gone to the front. I've been seeing him off from Charing Cross."
Pierson slipped his arm round her. They entered the house without speaking....
3
By the rail of his transport, as far--about two feet--as he could get from anyone, Cyril Morland stood watching Calais, a dream city, brighten out of the heat and grow solid. He could hear the guns already, the voice of his new life-talking in the distance. It came with its strange excitement into a being held by soft and marvellous memories, by one long vision of Noel and the moonlit gra.s.s, under the dark Abbey wall.
This moment of pa.s.sage from wonder to wonder was quite too much for a boy unused to introspection, and he stood staring stupidly at Calais, while the thunder of his new life came rolling in on that pa.s.sionate moonlit dream.
VII
After the emotions of those last three days Pierson woke with the feeling a s.h.i.+p must have when it makes landfall. Such reliefs are natural, and as a rule delusive; for events are as much the parents of the future as they were the children of the past. To be at home with both his girls, and resting--for his holiday would not be over for ten days--was like old times. Now George was going on so well Gratian would be herself again; now Cyril Morland was gone Noel would lose that sudden youthful love fever. Perhaps in two or three days if George continued to progress, one might go off with Noel somewhere for one's last week. In the meantime the old house, wherein was gathered so much remembrance of happiness and pain, was just as restful as anywhere else, and the companions.h.i.+p of his girls would be as sweet as on any of their past rambling holidays in Wales or Ireland. And that first morning of perfect idleness--for no one knew he was back in London--pottering, and playing the piano in the homely drawing-room where nothing to speak of was changed since his wife's day, was very pleasant. He had not yet seen the girls, for Noel did not come down to breakfast, and Gratian was with George.
Discovery that there was still a barrier between him and them came but slowly in the next two days. He would not acknowledge it, yet it was there, in their voices, in their movements--rather an absence of something old than the presence of something new. It was as if each had said to him: "We love you, but you are not in our secrets--and you must not be, for you would try to destroy them." They showed no fear of him, but seemed to be pus.h.i.+ng him unconsciously away, lest he should restrain or alter what was very dear to them. They were both fond of him, but their natures had set foot on definitely diverging paths. The closer the affection, the more watchful they were against interference by that affection. Noel had a look on her face, half dazed, half proud, which touched, yet vexed him. What had he done to forfeit her confidence--surely she must see how natural and right his opposition had been! He made one great effort to show the real sympathy he felt for her. But she only said: "I can't talk of Cyril, Daddy; I simply can't!"
And he, who easily shrank into his sh.e.l.l, could not but acquiesce in her reserve.
With Gratian it was different. He knew that an encounter was before him; a struggle between him and her husband--for characteristically he set the change in her, the defection of her faith, down to George, not to spontaneous thought and feeling in herself. He dreaded and yet looked forward to this encounter. It came on the third day, when Laird was up, lying on that very sofa where Pierson had sat listening to Gratian's confession of disbelief. Except for putting in his head to say good morning, he had not yet seen his son-in-law: The young doctor could not look fragile, the build of his face, with that law and those heavy cheekbones was too much against it, but there was about him enough of the look of having come through a hard fight to give Pierson's heart a squeeze.
"Well, George," he said, "you gave us a dreadful fright! I thank G.o.d's mercy." With that half-mechanical phrase he had flung an unconscious challenge. Laird looked up whimsically.
"So you really think G.o.d merciful, sir?"
"Don't let us argue, George; you're not strong enough."
"Oh! I'm pining for something to bite on."
Pierson looked at Gratian, and said softly:
"G.o.d's mercy is infinite, and you know it is."
Laird also looked at Gratian, before he answered:
"G.o.d's mercy is surely the amount of mercy man has succeeded in arriving at. How much that is, this war tells you, sir."
Pierson flushed. "I don't follow you," he said painfully. "How can you say such things, when you yourself are only just--No; I refuse to argue, George; I refuse."
Laird stretched out his hand to his wife, who came to him, and stood clasping it with her own. "Well, I'm going to argue," he said; "I'm simply bursting with it. I challenge you, sir, to show me where there's any sign of altruistic pity, except in man. Mother love doesn't count--mother and child are too much one."