Grasshopper Oneshot

Hidder: Hey, look at that, I’m actually not giving up. Here’s another short story I found yet again on Syosetu. This time I didn’t help s.h.i.+ro at all, I translated this during my lunch break, and it was very poorly translated, so he had to do all the job on the editing part, so he basically did the “I’m gonna change what the author-chan wrote to make it sound better” thing. 

Anyway, next item cheat part is probably going to be released this weekend.

s.h.i.+ro the Hero: It took me more than 10 minutes to finally figure out that the “plant hopper” (that’s how Hidder named our insect friend here originally) *pew pew pew, Hidder here, the insect was not named that, but I’m too lazy to find the actual english name for it* was actually a gra.s.shopper. I can’t believe I didn’t notice it for so long&h.e.l.lip; But hey, who expects to just randomly receive a barely readable, “translated” short story about a gra.s.shopper? I haven’t even seen one of these adorable little things in many years. Maybe I should venture into the vast, outside world beyond my room again&h.e.l.lip;?

Nah, of course not! What am I thinking?

And now that I’m thinking about it a little bit more, wasn’t one of the biblical plagues basically a gra.s.shopper infestation? (Yes, locusts are gra.s.shoppers.) HAH, NO NEED TO GO OUTSIDE FOR AN ENVIRONMENTAL HAZARD! Hikikomori-dom wins yet again! Booya! xD

 

*Once again, our intro is bigger than the actual story*

Raw: 

Gra.s.shopper.

Looking out of the shaking window of a train, I can see the belly of a reddish brown gra.s.shopper at the tip of my nose.

Oh, I do not feel like getting along with you. Would you mind going away? I try to threaten it away, but it looks very confident.

Okay. I will overlook this. I’ll let you drive free of charge.

However, the ride is quite long.

You took a strong gust of wind inside the tunnel, where are you heading that makes you try so hard?

Mind you, you have gone on a big journey.

Remember, you cannot return to your hometown with your own power.

You will not see your family anymore.

I will not mourn your death.

That's you. It’s a very sad thing.

Oh, you. If one looks closely, you're missing a leg.

Have you been hanging on so long with your legs like that?

I look behind you. There tend to be more lights in the city at night.

Well, it looks like this is the last stop.

I will get off now.

&h.e.l.lip; Hmmm, about that.

I'm not trying to be friends with you or anything, but I think that this is a city that you can live in.

Surely, you'll like it.