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"Well, yes; she may look in for another hour in the morning perhaps."
Ted was not skillful in deceit, and something in his manner told Katherine that the sitting somehow depended on her absence. She began to see dimly why he had been so frightened at the idea of going to Paris.
She looked over her shoulder.
"You haven't made the corners of her mouth turn up enough. It's just as well, they turn up too much."
"No, they don't; that's what makes her so pretty."
Katherine went to her work next morning in anything but a cheerful spirit. She had set her heart on Ted's studying abroad; and now Audrey had come in between, frittering away his time, and making him restless and unlike himself. To be sure, his powers had expanded enormously of late; but she was not happy about him, and was half afraid to praise his work. To her mind there was something feverish and unhealthy in its vivid beauty. It suggested genius outgrowing its strength. If Audrey really had anything to do with it, if she was coming in any way between him and the end she dreamed for him, why, then, she could hate Audrey with a deadly hatred. That was what she said to herself just before she opened the front-door and found Audrey standing on the doorstep, looking reprehensibly pretty in a gown of white lawn over green silk. Her wide hat was trimmed with bunches of white tulle and pale green poppies, and she had a little basket full of lilies of the valley hanging from her wrist.
"You wretch!" she cried, shaking a bunch of lilies at Katherine, as she stood in the narrow pa.s.sage; "you're always going out when I'm coming in."
"And you're always coming in when I'm going out. Isn't it funny?"
Audrey said nothing to that, but she kissed Katherine on both cheeks, and pinned a bunch of lilies at her throat with a little gold pin that she took from her own dress. Then she tripped lightly upstairs, with a swish, swish, of her silk skirts, wafting lilies of the valley as she went. Katherine watched her up the first flight, and the hate died out of her heart. After all, Audrey was so perfect from an artistic point of view that moral disapproval seemed somehow beside the point.'
"May I come in?" asked Audrey, tapping at the open door of the studio.
Ted rose with a reverent alacrity, very much as you rise to the musical parts of a solemn service in church. He arranged her chair carefully, with soft cus.h.i.+ons for her back and feet. "If you don't mind," said he, "we must work hard, for I want to finish you this morning, or perhaps to-morrow, if you can give me another sitting," and he patted a cus.h.i.+on and held it up for her head.
"You can have any number of sittings," said Audrey, ignoring these preparations for her comfort; "but first of all, I'm going to make your room pretty."
Ted dropped his cus.h.i.+on helplessly and followed her as she moved about the room. First she took off her gloves in a leisurely manner and laid them down among Ted's wet brushes. Then she began to arrange the lilies of the valley in a little copper bowl she found on the chimneypiece.
Then she caught sight of her gloves and exclaimed, "Oh, look at my beautiful new gloves, lying among your nasty paints! Why didn't you tell me, you horrid boy?" Then Ted and she tried to clean them with turpentine, and made them worse than ever, and between them they wasted half an hour of the precious morning. After that, Audrey took off her hat and settled herself comfortably among the cus.h.i.+ons; she drew her white fingers through her hair till it stood up in a great red aureole round her head, and the sitting began.
Ted's heart gave a bound as he set to work. He had learnt by this time to control the trembling of his hands, otherwise the portrait would never have reached its present perfection. He had painted from many women in the life school, and always with the same emotions, the same reverence for womanhood, and the same delight in his own power, tempered by compa.s.sion for the model. But these were so many studies in still life compared with the incarnate loveliness before him--Audrey: it made him feel giddy to paint the edge of the ruffles about her throat, or the tip of her shoe. Her beauty throbbed like pulses of light, it floated in air and went to his head like the scent of her lilies. He had reproduced this radiant, throbbing effect in his picture. It was a head, the delicate oval of the full face relieved against a background of atmospheric gold into which the golden surface tints of the hair faded imperceptibly. The eyebrows were arched a little over the earnest, unfathomable eyes; the lips were parted as if with impetuous breath; the whole head leaned slightly forward, giving prominence to the chin, which in reality retreated, a defect chiefly noticeable in profile. Ted had painted what he saw. It might have been the head of a saint looking for the Beatific Vision; it was only that of an ordinary pretty woman.
As a rule, they both chattered freely during the sittings. This is, of course, necessary, if the artist is to know his sitter's face with all its varying expressions; and Audrey had given Ted a great many to choose from. This morning, however, he worked steadily and in a silence which she was the first to break.
"What do you mean by talking about one more sitting in that way? You said you'd want six yesterday."
"I did, but----" He leaned back and began tilting his chair to and fro.
"The fact is--I'm awfully sorry, but I'm afraid I'm going to leave England." The young rascal had chosen his words with a deliberate view to effect, and Audrey's first thoughts flew to America, though not to Hardy. She moved suddenly in her chair.
"To emigrate? You, with your genius? Surely not!"
"No, rather not; it's not as bad as all that. But--I'm afraid I have to go to Paris for six months or so."
"Whatever for?"
"Well--I must, you see."
"Must you? And for six months, too; why?"
"Because I--that is--I want to study for a bit in the schools there."
"Oh,"--she leaned back again among her cus.h.i.+ons, and looked down at her hands clasped demurely,--"if you want to go, that's another thing."
"It isn't another thing; and I don't want to go, as it happens."
"Then I am sure you needn't go and study; what can they teach you that you don't know?" she leaned forward and looked into his face. "You're not going in for that horrid French style, surely?"
"Well, I'd some thoughts----" he hesitated, and Audrey took courage.
"It can't be--it mustn't be! Oh, do, do give up the idea--for _my_ sake!
It'll be your ruin as an artist." She had risen to her feet, and was gazing at him appealingly.
"You dear little thing, what do you know about the French school or any other?"
"Everything. I take in 'Modern Art,' and I read all the magazines and things, and--I know all about it."
"You don't know anything about it. All the same----" he paused, biting his lip.
"All the same, what?"
"If I thought you cared a straw whether I went or stayed----"
"Haven't I shown you that I care?"
"No, you haven't."
"Ted!" Audrey made that little word eloquent of pleading, reproachful pathos; but he went on--
"For heaven's sake, don't talk any more rot about art and my genius!
Anybody can do it. Do you think that's what I want to hear from you?" He checked himself suddenly. "I beg your pardon. Now I think we'll go on, if you don't mind sitting a little longer."
"But I do mind. Either you're very rude, or--I can't understand you. Why do you speak to me like this?" She had picked up her hat and begun playing with its long pins. As she spoke she stabbed it savagely in the crown. The nervous action of her hands contrasted oddly with the pensive Madonna-like pose of her head, but the corners of her mouth were turned up more than ever, and the tip of her little Roman nose was trembling.
Then she drew the pins slowly out of her hat, and made as if she would put it on. Ted tried to reason, but he could only grasp two facts clearly--that in another second she would be gone, and that if he left things as they stood he would have to exchange London for Paris. He leaned against the wall for support, and looked steadily at Audrey as he spoke.
"You think me a devil, and I can only prevent that by making you think me a fool. I don't care. I'm insane enough to love you--my curious behaviour must have made that quite obvious. If you'll say that you care for me a little bit, I won't go to Paris. If you won't, I'll go to-morrow and stay there."
Audrey had known for some time that something like this would happen.
She had meant it to happen. From the day she first saw Ted Haviland, she had made up her mind to be his destiny; and yet, now that it had happened, though Ted's words made her heart beat uncomfortably fast, a little voice in her brain kept on saying, "Not yet--not yet--not yet."
She sat down and tried to collect her thoughts. Ted would be sure to begin again in another second. He did.
"Or if you don't care now, if you'll only say that you might care some day, if you'll say that it's not an utter impossibility, I won't go.
I'll wait five years--ten years--on the off chance, and hold my tongue about it too, if you tell me to."
Not yet--not yet--not yet.
"Audrey!"
She started as if a stranger had called her name suddenly, for the voice was not like Ted's at all. Yet it was Ted, Ted in the shabby clothes she had seen him in first, which never looked shabby somehow on him; but it was not the baby as she knew him. He was looking at her almost defiantly, a cloud had come over his eyes, and the muscles of his face were set. Audrey saw the look of unrelenting determination, which is only seen to perfection in the faces of the very young, but it seemed to her that Ted had taken a sudden leap into manhood.
"Audrey," he said again, and their eyes met. She tried to speak, but it was too late. The boy had crouched down on the floor beside her, and was clasping her knees like a suppliant before some marble divinity.
"Don't--Ted, don't," she gasped under her breath.
"I won't. I don't ask you to do it now, before I've made my name. It may take years, but--I shall make it. And then, perhaps----"