Psyche - LightNovelsOnl.com
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"Can you really speak?" asked Psyche, astonished. "And fly? Oh, how happy you must be!!"
"Why have you called me, little princess?" said the Chimera.
"I wanted to see you quite near," replied Psyche. "I only saw you dart like winged lightning through the air, so soon were you away again; and I was always sorry when I could not see you any more. Then I became, oh, so sad!"
"And why did you want to see me quite near, little princess with the wings?"
"I find you so beautiful. I have never seen anything so beautiful; I did not know that anything so beautiful existed. What are you? A horse you are not. Nor a dragon either, nor a man. What are you?"
"I am the Chimera."
"Where do you come from?"
"From far away. From the lands which are beyond the lands, from the worlds beyond the worlds, from the heavens beyond the heavens."
"Where are you going?"
"Very far. Do you see those distant regions yonder, of silver and opal? Well, thousands of times so far I am going.... I go from illimitableness to illimitableness; I come from nothingness and I am going to nothingness."
"What is nothingness?"
"Everything. Nothingness is as far as your brains can think, my little princess; and then still farther, and nothingness is more than all that you see from this high tower...."
"Are you never tired?"
"No, my wings are strong; I can bear all mankind on my back, and I could carry them away to the stars behind the stars."
"If Astra knew that!"
"Astra knows it. But she does not want me. She reckons out the stars with figures."
"Why do you fly from one end to the other, O splendid Chimera? What is your object? What are you for?"
"What is your own object, little Psyche? What are you yourself for? For what are flowers, men, the stars? Who knows?"
"Astra...."
"No, Astra knows nothing. Her knowledge is founded on a fundamental error. All her knowledge is like a tower, which will fall down."
"I should like to know much. I should like to know more. I should like to seek far through the universe. I long for what is most beautiful.... But I do not know what it is. Perhaps you yourself are what is most beautiful, Chimera.... But why are you now spreading out your wings?"
"I must go."
"So soon? Whence? Oh, why are you going so soon, splendid Chimera?"
"I must. I must traverse illimitableness. I have already stayed here too long."
"Stay a little longer...."
"I cannot. I may not."
"Who compels you, O powerful horse, quick as lightning?..."
"Power."
"What is power?"
"G.o.d...."
"Who is G.o.d? Oh, tell me more! Tell me more! Don't go away yet! I want to ask you so much, to hear so much. I am so stupid. I have longed so for you. Now you have come, and now you want to go away again."
"Do not ask me for wisdom; I have none. Ask the Sphinx for wisdom; ask me for flight."
"Oh, stay a little longer! Don't flap so with your flaming wings! Who is the Sphinx? O Chimera, do not give me wisdom, but flight!"
"Not now...."
"When, then?"
"Later...."
"When is that?"
"Farewell."
"O Chimera, Chimera...!"
The horse had already spread out his wings broad. He was ascending. But Psyche suddenly threw both her arms round his neck and hung on to his mane.
"Let me go, little princess!" cried the horse. "I ascend quickly, and you will fall, to be dashed to pieces on the rock! Loose me!"
And slowly he ascended....
Psyche was afraid; she let go her arms; she became dizzy, fell against the pinnacle, and bruised one of her wings. That pained her ... but she heeded it not; the horse was already high in the air, and she followed his track with her eyes....
"He is gone," thought she. "Will he come again? Or have I seen him for the first and last time?"
"As a dream he came from far-off regions, and to still farther regions he has gone.... Oh, how dull the world seems! How dead is the horizon! And how dizzy I feel.... My wing pains me...."
With her hand she smoothed the wrinkle out of her wing; she stroked it till it was smooth again, and tears ran down her cheeks.
"Horrid wings! They cannot fly, they cannot follow the strong Chimera! I'm in such trouble, such trouble!! But ... no.... Is that trouble? Is that happiness? I know not.... I am very happy...! I am so sorrowful.... How beautiful he was! how strong, how sleek, how splendid, how quick, how wise, how n.o.ble, how broad his wings! how broad his wings!! How weak I am compared to him.... A child, a weak child; a weak, naked child with little wings.... O Chimera, my Chimera, O Chimera of my desire, come back! Come back!! Come back!! I cannot live without you; and if you do not come again, Chimera, then I will not live any longer lonely in this high castle. I will throw myself into the cataract...."
She stood up, her eyes looking eagerly into the empty air. She pressed her hands to her bosom, she wept, and her wings trembled as if from fever.
Then suddenly she saw the king, her father, sitting at the bow-window of his room. He did not see her, he was reading a scroll. But anxious lest he should see her trouble, her despair, and longing desire, she fled, along the battlements, the ramparts, through the pa.s.sages and halls of the castle, till she came to the tower, where her nurse sat at her spinning-wheel, and then she fell down at the feet of the old woman and sobbed aloud.
"What is it, darling?" asked the old crone, frightened. "Princess, what is it?"