Scamping Tricks and Odd Knowledge Part 7

"You are right; bribes and lies are twin brothers."

"Well, it was just a scamper all round. Yes, scamper and scamping. I had some good brickies then--militia chaps, smart, and they could stay.

They made the rings grow; I forget how much we got in that night, but a good length, for the bricks ran short at one end of the tunnel, and we were close up to the face at the other end. No one that I did not want to see was about. After measuring, I found we were short at least twenty yards of bricks, and only about two thousand or so left, so I said, 'Lads, if you finish the ring by five o'clock, you shall have a quid amongst you; but do it, and keep the beautiful clean face on for all you are worth.'

"I looked a bit crafty at them, and they twigged the tune to play. I took old Bond--he was my ganger--with me, and said to him, 'How are we going to do the lining?' We can't fetch bricks from the other end, and I draw the line at timber to do duty as bricks. I waited, and the 'extra' profit string of my brain worked right, and I pointed and said, 'There is a heap of broken bricks and no one knows what; well, twenty yards of that won't be noticed if you take it equally all round; put that in, and dose it with cement, and rake it well on the top of the rings, and don't forget to finish the top nicely and clean to a hair if you have not time to fill in all of it. Keep the best stuff for near the finish, and enough bricks to make a solid strip or two, and I am otherwise engaged or tired-out till four. Wake me then; I'm off for a peaceful snooze.' Well, they got it all in, and nothing was known till--I won't name it yet, it must wait."

"I suppose the bricks you took from the brick-yard were tallied, and deliveries checked with the work done in the lining?"

"Yes; but there is tallying of all sorts, and, of course, the right amount of bricks were taken from the yard early next morning, but where they went is best known to the yard foreman, the inspector of brickwork, and the dealer; but as my partners.h.i.+p with them is now at an end, of course my memory fails me, and I am sorry I can't give you any more information in that direction. It grieves me to keep back anything from you, and is so unlike me."

"I don't want to hurt your feelings. All right, I understand."

"Talk about varieties of concrete, why we had sardine and meat tins, all sorts and sizes and weights and ages, tiles, ashes, bones, gla.s.s, broken crockery, oyster sh.e.l.ls, and a lot of black-beetles and such-like s.h.i.+ning members of creation. They all did their duty to the best of their ability. What else there was I would rather not try to remember, but it was _not_ bricks."

"Don't trouble, I can understand. We are all pushed a bit for the right goods sometimes, and have to make s.h.i.+ft; but it is hard, very hard, to have to do it."

"Well, I found out that the bricks were not quite so many as I thought, and for a 5 feet length, about 15 feet from shaft No. 7, they had to do with one ring of brickwork, and the rest, my patent midnight conglomerate. That frightened me, and had I known it at the time, I would have stopped the show; of course I would, you know me. I always draw the line somewhere."

"Right you are; although 'somewhere' is an easy-stretching sort of place, and there is not much of a fixed abode about it; but it can generally be found on a foggy night."

"It's my belief they did not put in enough cement mortar, and carry out my orders, which indeed was very wrong of them."

"What do you mean, your orders were wrong?"

"Oh dear no, of course not, not likely--_their_ orders were wrong, not mine. You don't follow me rightly. You understand now? Dwell on it, and I'll wait."

"Oh yes, it was stupid of me. There, I am not so young as I was, nor so quick."

"Now we are coming to the scare. Pa.s.s my gla.s.s, it makes me feel weak, it does.

"That conglomerate length stood all right, more by luck than anything else, till one night, although all the rest was sound work and done properly, for it was well looked after, and there was no chance of a slide towards extra profit; besides, the ground would not have stood unbared long, and, of course, short lengths had to be the order, and were bound to be carried out, for the clay soon got dropsy and swelled.

"Well, my guv'nor took a contract for a line about 20 miles away from the tunnel. I had some work on it, and had to go to London, it was abroad, for I was called up by him, It was a slow train, and followed an express goods. There was a signal box at each end of the tunnel, and a fair traffic, and fast trains pa.s.sed. Something got wrong with a wagon of the express goods train--I never knew exactly what it was but anyhow, nothing very serious, for the permanent way was all right and so were the wheels and axles. We were stopped by hand-signal in the tunnel, and there may have been something wrong with the signals, but that does not matter for what I am going to tell you."

"Were you scared to think the train after you would telescope you?"

"No, for there was none for an hour and a half.

"Well, the carriage I was in pulled up just under the place where that patent midnight conglomerate length was put in, and I looked up and saw the old spot had bulged, and was yawning, and looked to me as wide and moving as the Straits of Dover in a S.W. gale, and a lot worse, and it seemed to be getting wider every minute, and I saw something drop. I was alone in the compartment, and it was fortunate I was for many reasons or I know they would have found me out. I knew the place. How could I forget it? It was just by the shaft. The pa.s.sengers were talking to the guards, or were otherwise engaged. Presently I heard the down mail coming at a rare speed. I said to myself, 'There is not much the matter, or they would not let her go through.' She was the last pa.s.senger train down that night, and lucky she was, you will soon say.

Oh! dear me, when I heard her I felt cold and hot, and my heart got to my teeth, and I believe if I had not kept my mouth shut it would have jumped out, that's true. What scared me most was not about the mail train, I knew she would be right, and would be past the spot before the ground had time to tumble in. She was going too quick, but our train, _and me_, right under the place, and bound to be there _after_ the mail had shaken it to bits! That's what made me feverish.

"I said to myself, 'You are paid out in your own coin, you are.' Before I had time to think more the mail went by all serene, and I hardly dare move, but slid up on the seat just in time to see her tail lights vanish. I then looked up, and if it had been my scaffold it could not have been worse. Oh! fill my gla.s.s up, nearly neat, while I wipe my forehead. Thank you. Yes, I looked up, and saw the crack had widened and was becoming wider, and chips were falling now and again as large as hailstones! I knew it was bound to come down. I looked to my watch, another full hour had to pa.s.s before the next train was due behind us.

I was just going to get out, when I heard the guard coming along on the footboard, and he said, 'Another five minutes and we are off, gentlemen.' He did not see the falling pieces, as the carriage hid them, but I did, and the engine blowing off steam prevented him hearing them. Soon he reached my carriage, and said, 'You are the only gentleman in this carriage.' He would not say anything more. I heard him repeat the same words almost as he moved along the train, 'Five minutes and we are off, gentlemen.'

"I said to myself, 'Five minutes more and I am buried and off for ever somewhere,' for I was certain in five-and-a-half the lining would burst and down everything would come and crush us to powder. I did not care to think what else or how much. I cannot describe how I felt, but drink squalls are nothing to it. I kept my watch out of my pocket, and gazed at it till I hated it. One minute pa.s.sed--two--three--and then I watched the second-hand go round. What I suffered cannot be told. I looked out of the window. I heard a whistle. It did not sound like our engine, it seemed too shrill. I had no fear of a train being behind us as I knew our road was blocked. Was it a down special excursion, or a down special goods, I said, tremblingly, to myself, for I knew all the down ordinaries had gone for the night. 'If it is,' I said to myself, 'you are settled and corpsed, and have made your own grave, and it will be a rough one.' I won't say what I did then, but know it would suit a clergyman.

"Thank goodness I was wrong, the whistle was from _our_ engine, but it had been low and now was shrill. I was so feverish that I forgot the steam was blowing off. At last we started, and I looked at my watch. It was five minutes ten seconds from when the guard spoke. I knew I was safe, but thought I would look back. I was just able to see in the glimmering, as the fire-box was open, and by the tail lamps the last carriage had well cleared the shaft when there was a horrid hollow sound like waves breaking in a long cavern, and I saw something come down like a veil across the metals. The tunnel was in, fallen in with a slow smash, and not a minute after we started!

"I don't know how long it took the train to get to the signal-box at the entrance, but we pulled up there, and the first thing I remembered was the guard saying to me, 'No one is hurt, you need not be frightened, but we have to thank G.o.d for it. Terrible shave. The tunnel has fallen in, and just where your carriage stood!'

"I said, 'Oh!' and sank back upon the seat. The guard again came to me and popped his head in and said 'You are the only pa.s.senger that knows what is up. Keep it quiet, if you please. Shouting will do no good, and I shall be much obliged to you. It's no fault of mine or the Company's.

Are you ill, sir?'

"'No, but I saw the tunnel fall in.'"

"'Traffic is stopped, sir, at both ends. The wires are right as we had reply from the other end of the tunnel. I thought you must have seen it fall in, because you looked very white, and were clasping the window frame with both hands and shaking so. I was afraid you had been almost scared with fright.'

"'No, I am not ill, but I saw it fall.'"

"'Well, sir, it is no fault of mine or the Company's, although I am sorry it has frightened you a little.' He then went away and we started again."

"When he said, 'It is no fault of mine,' bless you, it near cut my vitals out, it did; for I knew it was my fault and no other person's, and that it was only by the act of Providence the mail was not smashed to bits, and us too. I made a vow there and then never to have anything more to do with tunnels, and whenever I go through one I always feel wrong and twitchy, and shut my eyes till the rattle tones down and I know we are in the open."

"How much fell in?"

"About 20 yards altogether in length. Traffic had to go round for a month, but the rest of the work was all-right, and so it really was, and I ought to know. No one found out that nearly the whole of the fallen length had been scamped, for everything was broken and mixed up, and, as luck would have it, a spring burst out there and the flow had to be led away to one entrance, and the falling-in was always put down to that, and that only; still I know the ground was a bit cracked, and underground waters have mighty force, and are best guided and not tried to be stopped, for they will come out somewhere.

"I met my guv'nor next day, and he quietly said to me, 'I have let the tunnel work on your length to an old foreman,' and then he looked clean through me. I know he thought a lot, and I'm afraid I can't play the game of bluff as good as some can, and so work 'extra' profit out of ruins. What do you think of that scare?"

"I don't want to think about it. Glad I had nothing to do with it.

Dreadful! No wonder you have a wrinkle or two. What shocking hards.h.i.+ps we all have to pa.s.s through in getting 'extra' profit, and so undeserved!"

CHAPTER IX.

CYLINDER BRIDGE PIERS.

"Deep river bridge foundations are not to be easily worked for 'extra'

profit as they are generally too carefully looked after; still, even there, you get a chance occasionally, if you know how to work things. I was always on the scent for 'extras,' and once got a bit out of a cylinder bridge, more by luck than anything else."

"How did you do it?"

"Listen, and then you'll know."

"The bed of the river was soft for a depth of nearly 50 feet, then firm watertight ground, and into that we had to go about 15 feet. Our cylinders were 15 feet in diameter, of cast-iron, and in one piece 6 feet in height I will just name that there is more chance of a bit 'extra' profit when the rings are little in height than if they are in pieces and have vertical joints and are about 9 feet long as usual. A 15 feet ring, 6 feet in length in one piece was not often seen then, but they are now cast much heavier; still, they may be made too large to handle nicely without special tackle, and foundry cleverness should be considered less than ease in fixing on the site."

"Why are short lengths best for 'extra' profit?"

"Because you may have a chance of leaving out a ring if the coast is clear, and nice people around you."

"I see."

"Well, the Company's foreman had to lay up for three days, for he had ricked himself, and I had an old pal with me, and two of my nephews working the crane, and other relations about. All had been properly schooled, and knew crumbs of comfort were to be got out of a bit 'extra,' so I embraced the opportunity as we were such a charming family party, quite a happy farmyard.

"The rings went down rather easily as the bed of the river was soft; in fact, they sunk into the mud for the first 6 to 10 feet by their own weight. So I gave the office, and we just dropped a 6 feet ring over the side into the mud, for I knew it would sink all right, and that by the time the Company's foreman returned to work we should have pumped out the water from the cylinder and got enough concrete in to seal the bottom; of course, after the resident engineer had gone down to see the foundation was right, and I felt sure it would be, and that he would only look at the foundation, and not bother about the height of the cylinder or the number of rings; and if he did, we could dodge him a bit, as there would be four or five of us, and stages were fixed on the horizontal ring-f.l.a.n.g.es, and no numbers were cast on the rings, as they all were made to fit together. He went down, just as I thought, to see the foundation only, although he measured about a bit, and enjoyed himself. We worked the tape right--it takes two with a tape.

By-the-bye, I hate measuring-rods, they are not good business for 'extras.' They are so un.o.bliging. A tape you can pull a bit, and tuck under, according as you want a thing to appear to be of a different length to what it is. One of my gangers made a false end for a tape. He used to turn the end of the true tape under for a few inches and slip on his false end, or he added a false length if he wanted. He took good care to hold the end, and he could slip it on and off like a flash of lightning, and good enough for a conjurer. He could lengthen or shorten a tape a few inches at will; all he wanted was to hold the ring at the end. His false end was a bit of a real tape with his attachment, and I have seen him trick them really pretty.