A Nonsense Anthology - LightNovelsOnl.com
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_YE LAYE OF YE WOODPECKORE_
_Picus Erythrocephalus_:
O whither goest thou, pale student Within the wood so fur?
Art on the chokesome cherry bent?
Dost seek the chestnut burr?
_Pale Student_:
O it is not for the mellow chestnut That I so far am come, Nor yet for puckery cherries, but For Cypripedium.
A blossom hangs the choke-cherry And eke the chestnut burr, And thou a silly fowl must be, Thou red-head wood-p.e.c.k.e.re.
_Picas Erythrocephalus_:
Turn back, turn back, thou pale student, Nor in the forest go; There lurks beneath his bosky tent The deadly mosquito,
And there the wooden-chuck doth tread, And from the oak-tree's top The red, red squirrels on thy head The frequent acorn drop.
_Pale Student_:
The wooden-chuck is next of kin Unto the wood-p.e.c.k.e.re: I fear not thine ill-boding din, And why should I fear her?
What though a score of acorns drop And squirrels' fur be red!
'Tis not so ruddy as thy top-- So scarlet as thy head.
O rarely blooms the Cypripe- dium upon its stalk; And like a torch it s.h.i.+nes to me Adown the dark wood-walk.
O joy to pluck it from the ground, To view the purple sac, To touch the sessile stigma's round-- And shall I then turn back?
_Picus Erytbrocephalus_:
O black and s.h.i.+ning is the log That feeds the sumptuous weed, Nor stone is found nor bedded log Where foot may well proceed.
Midmost it glimmers in the mire Like Jack o' Lanthorn's spark, Lighting, with phosph.o.r.escent fire, The green umbrageous dark.
There while thy thirsty glances drink The fair and baneful plant, Thy shoon within the ooze shall sink And eke thine either pant.
_Pale Student_:
Give o'er, give o'er, thou wood-peckore; The bark upon the tree, Thou, at thy will, mayst peck and bore But peck and bore not me.
Full two long hours I've searched about And 't would in sooth be rum, If I should now go back without The Cypripedium.
_Picus Erythrocephalus_:
Farewell! Farewell! But this I tell To thee, thou pale student, Ere dews have fell, thou'lt rue it well That woodward thou didst went:
Then whilst thou blows the drooping nose And wip'st the pensive eye-- There where the sad _symplocarpus foetidus_ grows, Then think--O think of I!
Loud flouted there that student wight Solche warnynge for to hear; "I scorn, old hen, thy threats of might, And eke thine ill grammere."
"Go peck the lice (or green or red) That swarm the ba.s.s-wood tree, But wag no more thine addled head Nor clack thy tongue at me."
The wood-peck turned to whet her beak, The student heard her drum, As through the wood he went to seek The Cypripedium.
Alas! and for that pale student: The evening bell did ring, And down the walk the Freshmen went Unto the prayer-meeting;
Upon the fence loud rose the song, The weak, weak tea was o'er-- Ha! who is he that sneaks along Into South Middle's door?
The mud was on his shoon, and O!
The briar was in his thumb, His staff was in his hand but no-- No Cypripedium.
_Henry A. Beers_.
_COLLUSION BETWEEN A ALEGAITER AND A WATER-SNAIK_
There is a niland on a river lying, Which runs into Gautimaly, a warm country, Lying near the Tropicks, covered with sand; Hear and their a symptum of a Wilow, Hanging of its umberagious limbs & branches Over the clear streme meandering far below.
This was the home of the now silent Alegaiter, When not in his other element confine'd: Here he wood set upon his eggs asleep With 1 ey observant of flis and other pa.s.sing Objects: a while it kept a going on so: Fereles of danger was the happy Alegaiter!
But a las! in a nevil our he was fourced to Wake! that dreme of Blis was two sweet for him.
1 morning the sun arose with unusool splender Whitch allso did our Alegaiter, coming from the water, His scails a flinging of the rais of the son back, To the fountain-head which tha originly sprung from, But having not had nothing to eat for some time, he Was slepy and gap'd, in a short time, widely.
Unfoalding soon a welth of perl-white teth, The rais of the son soon shet his sinister ey Because of their mutool splendor and warmth.
The evil Our (which I sed) was now come; Evidently a good chans for a water-snaik Of the large specie, which soon appeared Into the horison, near the bank where reposed Calmly in slepe the Alegaiter before spoken of.
About 60 feet was his Length (not the 'gaiter) And he was aperiently a well-proportioned snaik.
When he was all ash.o.r.e he glared upon The iland with approval, but was soon "Astonished with the view and lost to wonder" (from Wats) (For jest then he began to see the Alegaiter) Being a nateral enemy of his'n, he worked hisself Into a fury, also a ni position.
Before the Alegaiter well could ope His eye (in other words perceive his danger) The Snaik had enveloped his body just 19 Times with "foalds voluminous and vast" (from Milton) And had tore off several scails in the confusion, Besides squeazing him awfully into his stomoc.
Just then, by a fortinate turn in his affairs, He ceazed into his mouth the careless tale Of the unreflecting water-snaik! Grown desperate He, finding that his tale was fast squesed Terrible while they roaled all over the iland.
It was a well-conduckted Affair; no noise Disturbed the harmony of the seen, ecsept Onct when a Willow was snaped into by the roaling.
Eeach of the combatence hadn't a minit for holering.
So the conflick was naterally tremenjous!
But soon by grate force the tail was bit complete- Ly of; but the eggzeration was too much For his delicate Const.i.tootion; he felt a compression Onto his chest and generally over his body; When he ecspressed his breathing, it was with Grate difficulty that he felt inspired again onct more.
Of course this state must suffer a revolootion.
So the alegaiter give but one yel, and egspired.
The water-snaik realed hisself off, & survay'd For say 10 minits, the condition of His fo: then wondering what made his tail hurt, He slowly went off for to cool.
_J. W. Morris_.
_ODD TO A KROKIS_
Selestial apoley which Didest inspire.
the souls of burns and pop with sackred fir.
Kast thy Mantil over me When i shal sing, the praiz Of A sweat flower who grows in spring Which has of late kome under the Fokis.