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Sagittulae, Random Verses Part 12

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ADDRESSED TO HIS UNIVERSITY.

Wish ye, sons of Alma Mater, Long lost laurels to replace?

Listen to a stout old Pater, Once renowned in many a race.

Now, alas! I'm fat and forty, And my form grows round to view; And my nose is rather "porty;"

But my heart is still light-blue.



'Tis as bad as an emetic, E'en my 'baccy I refuse, When I hear that sports athletic Interfere with Cambridge crews.

Once a Grecian runner famous Scorned to fight his country's foes; And to Greece, as some to Camus, Caused innumerable woes.

When I hear the voice parental Cry, "my youngster shall not row!"

Then my wrath is transcendental, Then my words with vigour flow.

Sires, with hearts of alabaster, Your stern "vetos" yet you'll rue, When ye see a sixth disaster, Overwhelm your loved light-blue.

But whatever to Cambridge happen, Sons of Cam behave like men!

Rally round your royal Cap'en, _King_ of _Lake_, and King of Fen!

Fortune helps the brave who court her, Only to yourselves be true; And perhaps, on Putney's water, Victory will crown light-blue.

When your c.o.x'en cries "all ready,"

Be alert, dismiss all napping, Get well forward, all sit steady, Grasp the oar, avoid all "capping:"

Shoulders square, back straight, eyes ever Fixed upon the back before; Then all eight, with one endeavour, Dip at once the bladed oar.

Catch your stroke at the beginning, Then let legs with vigour work: Little hope has he of winning, Who his "stretcher" loves to s.h.i.+rk.

Let your rigid arms extended Be as straight as pokers two; And until the stroke is ended, Pull it, without jerking, through!

Thus all disputations spurning, Ye, ere many a year has past, While old Fortune's wheel is turning, Victory shall taste at last.

Only wait and work together; Trust in discipline and pluck-- Soon bad luck will run his tether, And good rowing bring good luck.

(1866).

THE SORROWS OF FATHER CAM.

1. WATNEY Lady Margaret. 5. STEAVENSON Trinity Hall 2. BEEBEE Lady Margaret. 6. BORTHWICK 1st Trinity.

3. PIGOTT Corpus 7. GRIFFITHS 3rd Trinity.

4. KINGLAKE 3rd Trinity. 8. LAWES 3rd Trinity.

Steerer, ARCHER, Corpus.

One night, as I silently wandered By Cam's slow meandering stream, And many things mentally pondered, I saw, as it were in a dream, A black head emerge from the billows, A broad body swim through the flood, Till, beneath the o'ershadowing willows, It sank gently down in the mud.

All alone--as a Scholar of Tyrwhitt When examined in Hebrew he sits-- On a log that mysterious spirit Smokes in silence, and silently spits.

And yet not alone sat the vision; There came, as he sat on his log, A wag of delight and submission From the tail of each demi-drowned dog.

Black eels from his temples were hanging, His teeth were like teeth of a jack; His lips were inaudibly "slanging"; His eyes were all muddy and black; And water-snakes, round his neck twining, Were hissing; and water-rats swam At his feet; so without much divining I recognised Old Father Cam.

"All hail to thee, Camus the reedy!"

I cried, in alarm and surprise; "Say, why are thy garments so weedy?

And why are these tears in thine eyes?"

Then the River-G.o.d answered me sadly, "My glory aquatic is gone!

My prospects, alas! look but badly; Not a race for four years have I won.

"I have oarsmen as strong---even stronger-- Than when my first honours I bore; Their arms are as long--perhaps longer; Their shoulders as broad as of yore, Yet the prospects of light-blue look bluer; I am losing my swing, form and time; For who can row well in a sewer; Or pull through miasma and slime?"

Thus murmured the River-G.o.d moaning; But I bade him to dry his old eye-- "In vain is this weeping and groaning; Let your motto be, 'Never say die!'

Though your waves be more foul than Cocytus, Though your prospects, no doubt, are most blue; Since Oxford is ready to fight us, We will try to select a good crew.

My friend Lady Margaret tells me She can lend me a Bow and a Two; The Lady, I own, sometimes sells me, But this time I am sure she'll be true.

For WATNEY is wiry and plucky, And that BEEBEE'S A 1 all allow; And our boat cannot fail to be lucky With a double 1st Cla.s.s in the bow.

"Then Corpus its PIGOTT shall lend us, Young, healthy, and active, and strong; And Etona her KINGLAKE shall send us, To row our good vessel along; And Five from the head of the river, Like Pallas from Jove's head appearing, Shall add to the weight of the quiver Of the feather-weight Argonaut steering.

"Then BORTHWICK, the mighty and ma.s.sive, Shall row like a Briton at Six; And GRIFFITHS, not p.r.o.ne to be pa.s.sive, Shall pull us to glory like bricks.

Our 'Stroke,' people say, on the feather Is a trifle too fond of a pause; But while some say, 'there's nothing like leather,'

I maintain there is nothing like LAWES.

"Washerwomen, not over aquatic, Says he rows 'like a mangle'--what tras.h.!.+

That his swing and his time are erratic; That he puts in his oar with a splash.

But these wonderful judges of rowing, If we win will be loud in applause; And declare 'the result was all owing To that excellent stroke, MR. LAWES.'

"Our Coach, on the bank briskly riding, Will keep his strong team well together, His Bucephalus gamely bestriding, In spite of the wind and the weather.

For the laws of the land you may send me To Counsel from chambers in Town; For the laws of the river commend me To the CHAMBERS of Cambridge renown.

"Then cheer up, beloved Father Camus!

Blow your nose! dry those tears that are falling; You will live once again to be famous, In spite of the prospects appalling.

Though dead dogs down your fair stream are floating, Father Cam will their odours defy; Though Oxford may beat us in boating, Yet Cambridge will 'never say die!'"

(1865).

THE COMING BOAT RACE.

OXFORD. CAMBRIDGE.

1. R. T. RAIKES. 1. J. STILL.

2. F. CROWDER. 2. J. R. SELWYN.

3. W. FREEMAN. 3. J. A. BOURKE.

4. F. WILLAN. 4. J. FORTESCUE.

5. E. F. HENLEY. 5. D. F. STEVENSON.

6. W. W. WOOD. 6. R. A. KINGLAKE.

7. H. P. SENHOUSE. 7. H. WATNEY.

8. M. BROWN. 8. W. R. GRIFFITHS.

Steerer--C. R. W. TOTTENHAM. Steerer--A. FORBES.

Attend, all ye who wish to see the names of each stout crew, Who've come to town from cap and gown to fight for their favourite blue.

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