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At the gate Russell met him. Eric felt the meeting inopportune; he was ashamed to meet his friend, ashamed to speak to him, envious of him, and jealous of his better reputation. He wanted to pa.s.s him by without notice, but Russell would not suffer this. He came up to him and took his arm affectionately. The slightest allusion to his late disgrace would have made Eric flame out into pa.s.sion; but Russell was too kind to allude to it then. He talked as if nothing had happened, and tried to turn his friend's thoughts to more pleasant subjects. Eric appreciated his kindness, but he was still sullen and fretful, and it was not until they parted that his better feelings won the day. But when Russell said to him "Good bye, Eric," it was too much for him, and seizing Edwin's hand, he wrung it hard, and tears rushed to his eyes.
"Dear, good Edwin! how I wish I was like you. If all my friends were like you, I should never get into these troubles."
"Nay, Eric," said Russell, "you may be far better than I. You have far batter gifts, if you will only do yourself justice."
They parted by Mr. Williams' door, and Russell walked home sad and thoughtful; but Eric, barely answering his brother's greeting, rushed up to his room, and, flinging himself on his bed, sobbed like a child at the remembrance of his disgrace. They were not refres.h.i.+ng tears; he felt something hard at his heart, and, as he prayed neither for help nor forgiveness, it was pride and rebellion, not penitence, that made him miserable.
CHAPTER VI
HOME AFFECTIONS
"Keep the spell of home affection.
Still alive in every heart; May its power, with mild direction, Draw our love from self apart, Till thy children Feel that thou their Father art."
SCHOOL HYMN.
"I have caught such a lot of pretty sea anemones, Eric," said little Vernon Williams, as his brother strolled in after morning school; "I wish you would come and look at them."
"O, I can't come now, Verny; I am going out to play cricket with some fellows directly."
"But it won't take you a minute; do come."
"What a little bore you are. Where are the things?"
"O, never mind, Eric, if you don't want to look at them," said Vernon, hurt at his brother's rough manner.
"First you ask me to look, and then say 'never mind,'" said Eric impatiently; "here, show me them."
The little boy brought a large saucer, round which the crimson sea-flowers were waving their long tentacula in the salt water.
"Oh, ay; very pretty indeed. But I must be off to cricket."
Vernon looked up at his brother sadly.
"You aren't so kind to me, Eric, as you used to be."
"What nonsense! and all because I don't admire those nasty red-jelly things, which one may see on the sh.o.r.e by thousands any day. What a little goose you are, Vernon!"
Vernon made no reply, but was putting away his sea-anemones with a sigh, when in came Russell to fetch Eric to the cricket.
"Well, Verny," he said, "have you been getting those pretty sea-anemones? come here and show me them. Ah, I declare you've got one of those famous white plumosa fellows among them. What a lucky little chap you are!"
Vernon was delighted.
"Mind you take care of them," said Russell. "Where did you find them?"
"I have been down the sh.o.r.e getting them."
"And have you had a pleasant morning?"
"Yes, Russell, thank you. Only it is rather dull being always by myself, and Eric never comes with me now."
"Naughty Eric," said Russell, playfully. "Never mind, Verny; you and I will cut him, and go by ourselves."
Eric had stood by during the conversation, and the contrast of Russel's unselfish kindness with his own harsh want of sympathy, struck him. He threw his arms round his brother's neck, and said, "We will both go with you, Verny, next half holiday."
"O, thank you, Eric," said his brother; and the two schoolboys ran out.
But when the next half holiday came, warm and bright, with the promise of a good match that afternoon, Eric repented his promise, and left Russell to amuse his little brother, while he went off, as usual, to the playground.
There was one silent witness of scenes like these, who laid them up deeply in her heart. Mrs. Williams was not un.o.bservant of the gradual but steady falling off in Eric's character, and the first thing she noticed was the blunting of his home affections. When they first came to Roslyn, the boy used constantly to join his father and mother in their walks; but now he went seldom or never; and even if he did go, he seemed ashamed, while with them, to meet any of his schoolfellows. The spirit of false independence was awake and growing in her darling son. The bright afternoons they had spent together on the sunny sh.o.r.e, or seeking for sea-flowers among the lonely rocks of the neighboring headlands,--the walks at evening and sunset among the hills, and the sweet counsel they had together, when the boy's character opened like a flower in the light and warmth of his mother's love,--the long twilights when he would sit on a stool with his young head resting on her knees, and her loving hand among his fair hair,--all these things were becoming to Mrs. Williams memories, and nothing more.
It was the trial of her life, and very sad to bear; the more so because they were soon to be parted, certainly for years, perhaps for ever. The time was drawing nearer and nearer; it was now June, and Mr. Williams'
term of furlough ended in two months. The holidays at Roslyn were the months of July and August, and towards their close Mr. and Mrs. Williams intended to leave Vernon at Fairholm, and start for India--sending back Eric by himself as a boarder in Dr. Rowlands' house.
After morning school, on fine days, the boys used to run straight down to the sh.o.r.e and bathe. A bright and joyous scene it was. They stripped off their clothes on the s.h.i.+ngle that adjoined the beach, and then running along the sands, would swim out far into the bay till their heads looked like small dots glancing in the suns.h.i.+ne. This year Eric had learned to swim, and he enjoyed the bathing more than any other pleasure.
One day after they had dressed, Russell and he began to amuse themselves on the sea-sh.o.r.e. The little translucent pools left on the sands by the ebbing tide always swarm with life, and the two boys found great fun in hunting audacious little crabs, or catching the shrimps that shuffled about in the shallow water. At last Eric picked up a piece of wood which he found lying on the beach, and said, "What do you say to coming crabfis.h.i.+ng, Edwin? this bit of stick will do capitally to thrust between the rocks in the holes where they lie?"
Russell agreed, and they started to the rocks of the Ness to seek a likely place for their purpose. The Ness was a mile off, but in the excitement of their pleasure they were oblivious of time.
The Williams', for the boys' convenience, usually dined at one, but on this day they waited half an hour for Eric. Since, however, he didn't appear, they dined without him, supposing that he was accidentally detained, and expecting him to come in every minute. But two o'clock came, and no Eric; half-past two, and no Eric; three, but still no Eric.
Mrs. Williams became seriously alarmed, and even her husband grew uneasy.
Vernon was watching for his brother at the window, and seeing Duncan pa.s.s by, ran down to ask him, "If he knew where Eric was?"
"No," said Duncan; "last time I saw him was on the sh.o.r.e. We bathed together, and I remember his clothes were lying by mine when I dressed.
But I hav'n't seen him since. If you like we'll go and look for him. I daresay he's on the beach somewhere."
But they found no traces of him there; and when they returned with this intelligence, his mother got so agitated that it required all her husband's firm gentleness to support her sinking spirits. There was enough to cause anxiety, for Vernon repeatedly ran out to ask the boys who were pa.s.sing if they had seen his brother, and the answer always was, that they had left him bathing in the sea.
Meanwhile our young friends, having caught several crabs, suddenly noticed by the sun that it was getting late.
"Good gracious, Edwin," said Eric, pulling out his watch, "it's half-past three; what have we been thinking of? How frightened they'll be at home;" and running back as fast as they could, they reached the house at five o'clock, and rushed into the room.
"Eric, Eric," said Mrs. Williams faintly, "where have you been? has anything happened to you, my child?"
"No, mother, nothing. I've only been crabfis.h.i.+ng with Russell, and we forgot the time."
"Thoughtless boy," said his father, "your mother has been in an agony about you."
Eric saw her pale face and tearful eyes, and flung himself in her arms, and mother and son wept in a long embrace. "Only two months," whispered Mrs. Williams, "and we shall leave you, dear boy, perhaps forever. O do not forget your love for us in the midst of new companions."
The end of term arrived; this time Eric came out eighth only instead of first, and, therefore, on the prize day, was obliged to sit among the crowd of undistinguished boys. He saw that his parents were disappointed, and his own ambition was grievously mortified. But he had full confidence in his own powers, and made the strongest resolutions to work hard the next half-year, when he had got out of "that Gordon's" clutches.
The Williams' spent the holidays at Fairholm, and now, indeed, in the prospect of losing them, Eric's feelings to his parents came out in all their strength. Most happily the days glided by, and the father and mother used them wisely. All their gentle influence, all their deep affection, were employed in leaving on the boy's heart lasting impressions of G.o.dliness and truth. He learnt to feel that their love would encircle him for ever with its heavenly tenderness, and their pure prayers rise for him night and day to the throne of G.o.d.
The day of parting came, and most bitter and heartrending it was. In the wildness of their pa.s.sionate sorrow, Eric and Vernon seemed to hear the sound of everlasting farewells. It is G.o.d's mercy that ordains how seldom young hearts have to endure such misery.