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And how was she going to dothat? Walk in there with Dave's service weapon and order them to free her dog?
She blinked as she stood on the lawn, watching the Animal Control van round the corner onto Armistead Avenue.
Whynot just walk in with the gun and demand her dog?
Well, for one thing, they would recognize her, and the night watchman probably had a gun of his own.
But she could get around that . . .
She stood, thinking hard, for a moment, then turned and went inside.
A few hours later, somewhere between 2:00 and 3:00 in the morning, she cruised down the deserted streets and parked the car in an empty lot two blocks from the pound; she didn't want anyone getting her license number. Then she got out and opened the trunk. She was trembling; it took three tries before she could get the key in the lock. It opened at last, though, and she reached in and pulled out Dave's bulletproof vest.
She'd never worn it before, and it was too big for her, but she got it on and tied it in place, the kevlar panels pressing uncomfortably on her b.r.e.a.s.t.s-it was meant for a man, not a woman, and she was bigchested.
Then she pulled on the old black raincoat, to further hide her figure-she was already wearing black jeans and a black T-s.h.i.+rt, to make it as difficult as possible to see any distinctive details about her. Her feet were in old deck shoes with black stockings pulled up over them, to blur any markings or footprints.
Then came the motorcycle helmet with the dark visor, hiding her face and hair completely-and making it hard to see; it was like wearing sungla.s.ses at night.
Itwas wearing sungla.s.ses at night, really-the tinted visor was meant to serve the same purpose, as well as keeping bugs out of a motorcyclist's teeth.
And then came the scary part, as she lifted Dave's pump-action twelve-gauge out of the trunk.
She had fired the gun exactly three times. The first time she had started at the bang when it went off, but the other two she had been ready for it. She had still completely missed the target Dave had set up for her, and the next day her shoulder had been sore from the recoil, but she had fired it.
Her hands trembling again, she loaded five rounds of birdshot into the magazine. That wouldn't kill anyone, she was pretty sure, but it should be enough to hurt and to scare away anyone who got in her way.
Thus equipped, she marched toward the pound.
There were lights on-not very many, but at least two. That was a good sign; she needed there to be someone in there she could frighten into opening Dave's cage. She reached the main entrance without serious incident, despite being almost blind with the helmet's visor down; she had to lift it to peek now and again. Once she reached the entry she held the shotgun in one hand, and pounded on the door with the other.
Nothing happened; she pounded again.
She was starting to think about what she would do if the night watchman refused to answer when a surly voice called, "Who the h.e.l.l is it at this hour?"
"It's an emergency," Jenny called. "I need to use your phone."
"Oh, Christ . . ." The door started to swing open.
Jenny thrust the barrel of the shotgun into the crack, then pushed herself after it, stepping into the building.
She found herself in a narrow hallway, on a scuffed linoleum floor between green concrete walls, lit by bare bulbs in wire cages overhead. Backing away from her was a young man in a dirty T-s.h.i.+rt and torn jeans. The lights at least let her see through the confounded visor. "Put up your . . ." she began; then she stopped as she realized he already had both hands raised high.
"Oh G.o.d oh G.o.d oh G.o.d," he said, stumbling backward down the hall. "Listen, there's no money here, I swear there isn't, if there were I'd have stolen it myself."
"I don't want money," Jenny growled, trying to lower her alto voice to a tenor-she had hopes that her disguise hid her s.e.x as well as her face.
"What, did Uncle Bill do something again? Listen, I swear, I didn't have anything to do . . ."
"Shut up," Jenny growled, aiming the shotgun at the man's nose.
The man-a kid, really-shut up and froze where he was.
Uncle Bill?
"Who are you?" Jenny demanded. "Who's Uncle Bill?"
"I'm Rafe Hayes," the kid said. "Uncle Bill's the mayor. My mom's brother."
"Mayor Beasley is your uncle?" She stared for a moment; yes, there was a resemblance. "He got you this job?"
Rafe nodded eagerly. "You don't want to hurt me," he said. "My uncle would get really p.i.s.sed."
"I don't care what your uncle wants!" Jenny roared-aware as she did that her bellow was not up to Dave's standards; she didn't have a man's lung capacity or a cop's experience in yelling. "I'm here for my . . . for the animals." It had occurred to her at the last instant that revealing she was after a particular "dog" might not be wise. She didn't want to attract everyone's attention to that one specific canine, especially not when she'd told the animal control crew that Dave was her dog.
"Oh!" The kid looked suddenly relieved. "You're an animal rights activist? Which group?"
"Uh . . . Free Our Furry Friends," Jenny improvised hastily.
"I haven't heard of that one . . ."
"We're new."
"So, like, do you have a specific agenda? Have you got a truck here, or something, to take 'em away?"
"That's not your problem. You just open the doors I tell you to open and keep your mouth shut and your hands where I can see 'em." She jabbed with the gun; Rafe's hands, which had started to descend, rushed back up toward the ceiling.
"Okay," he said, staring at the gun.
"Good. Now, where are the cages?"
Rafe led the way down the corridor and through a door into the depths of the pound. Jenny foundherself surrounded by dogs of all sizes and varieties, most of them asleep, a few stirring at this unexpected intrusion. A Great Dane whined at her, and a Pomeranian yapped.
She didn't see Dave.
"Where are the newest ones?" she asked. "The ones they brought in tonight?"
"Oh, they're in the other room," Rafe said. "We don't put 'em in here until the vet's okayed them."
"Show me," she growled. An Alsatian growled in response. "Shut up," Jenny told the dog. Then she gestured with the gun.
Rafe led the way to the holding area; here half the cages were empty, several held cats-and crammed into one of them was a big gray wolf, wide awake and watching them silently.
"Let that one out first," Jenny said, pointing. "That cage is too small for him; it's inhumane."
"Yessir," Rafe said. He fetched a ring of keys from a peg by the door and unlocked Dave's cage. Dave bounded out the instant the door opened, then hesitated, looking at Jenny and Rafe and Jenny's gun.
"Good dog," Jenny said. "You're free now." She waved at the room's open door, and Dave trotted out into the pa.s.sageway, out of sight.
Now Jenny found herself facing a dilemma; to maintain her cover story of being an animal rights activist she needed to let more animals go-but she didn't particularlywant a bunch of strays roaming the area.
She hoped they wouldn't do any real harm.
"Let out the others," she said.
Rafe hurried to unlock the cages, releasing the half-dozen cats-and while he was doing that, Jenny stepped back out into the hallway and closed the door.
Dave was waiting there; he looked up at her expectantly. Obviously, he thought she had a plan.
She didn't; she was making this up as she went along. She needed some way to get out of here without making a mess of it all. She wasn't a detective like Dave, with lots of police training . . .
Police. She looked at him, and then smiled.
"Is that a siren?" she shouted. "d.a.m.n it, did you call the cops?"
"No, I swear . . . !" Rafe called back. A cat yowled and hissed, and Rafe muttered something Jenny couldn't make out.
"You stay in there until I tell you to come out, you . . . you untrustworthy person, you!"
Lame, Jenny, she told herself. Really lame. "You untrustworthy person"? She giggled. "Come on, Dave,"
she said. "The car's that way."
Together, woman and wolf ran for the door. They were almost there when Rafe burst out of the room with a pistol in his hand and fired at her.
The first shot went wild, chipping concrete from the wall, but the sharp bang startled Jenny; she stumbled, but caught herself without falling.
The second shot hit her square in the back and felt like she'd been kicked.
"Ow," she said, as she turned around and raised the shotgun.
Dave had already spun around and was charging down the hallway; Rafe fired again, this time at the animal plunging toward him.
"No!" Jenny shouted, raising the shotgun-but she couldn't shoot; she might hit Dave.
Dave didn't seem to be hurt. Rafe fired again, at point-blank range, and then Dave's teeth closed on his wrist. Jenny heard something crunch horribly, and the pistol fell to the floor. Then Rafe went over backward, the wolf on top of him . . .
"No!" Jenny shouted. "Da- Don't! Get off him!" She raised the shotgun again and pointed it directly at her own husband.
The wolf turned and glared at her, those big yellow eyes almost glowing. For a moment they stared at each other-and Jenny realized she was staring along the barrel of the shotgun, the sights aimed directly at Dave.
She lowered the gun, and Dave leapt off Rafe and ran for the door.
Jenny hesitated until she heard Rafe groan-he was alive and conscious, so she didn't think he could be that badly hurt. She turned and yanked open the door; Dave bounded out, with Jenny close behind.
A moment later they were in the car, Dave in the back and Jenny driving. She pulled out of the lot with tires squealing.
They made it home safely, and Jenny staggered inside. She dropped the shotgun, peeled off her black raincoat and her Kevlar armor, tossed aside the motorcycle helmet, and then leaned against a wall, panting. Utterly exhausted, she let herself slide down until she was sitting on the floor.
Dave came to her, tongue lolling from his mouth, and put his head in her lap. She petted him once before falling asleep, sprawled there in the foyer.
She was awakened by the transformation; dawn's light was streaming into the house, and the head in her lap had changed from a wolf's to a man's. Dave's eyes, human once again, looked up at her.
"That little b.a.s.t.a.r.d shot you!" he said.
"I had your bulletproof vest on," she said. "He shotyou , and you weren't wearing anything!"
He still wasn't, she noticed admiringly. Her husband was unquestionably a fine-looking man-when he was a man at all. "Just fur," he said. "I guess the stories are true, though-you need silver bullets to kill a werewolf."
"I would rather never have tested that," she said, stroking his hair.
"Would you really have shot me if I'd done what I wanted to and ripped his throat out?" Dave asked.
"I don't know," Jenny admitted. "And Ireally don't want to testthat one!"
"Same here," he said. "But I'm glad you aimed-helped me get my temper back under control. I mean, the little b.a.s.t.a.r.dshot you!"
"I'm fine," Jenny insisted.
Dave sat up. "Let me see your back," he said.
She was too tired to argue; she turned and let Dave pull up her s.h.i.+rt.
"Nasty bruise," he said. "Skin's not broken."
"Told you," she muttered.
"Yeah, you did," he agreed. "And you told me I was crazy to run for mayor, and you were right about that, too." He shook his head. "I probably broke that kid's wrist tonight, and I might've killed him. And . .
. and if the silver bullet part is true, then maybe the contagious bite is true, too, and he'll be out there running around on all fours next month, same as me. That'sbad , and we'll have to do something about it.
This whole werewolf thing-I was kidding myself, Jen. It's not just an inconvenience. It'd never work, me being mayor."
She twisted around to face him. "You're not going to run?" she asked.
"No, I'm not," he said.
She remembered Rafe Hayes talking about his uncle, Bill Beasley. She remembered Rafe making threats and promises and firing that gun wildly. She remembered a dozen other things about Bill Beasley and his family, and she considered what might have to be done to ensure that Rafe Hayes didn't become a public menace at the next full moon.
"ThenI will," she said.
Russian-born Marina Frants's first Baba Yaga story, "A Bone to Pick" (co-auth.o.r.ed with husband Keith R.A. DeCandido) appeared inDid You Say Chicks?!She's back with a tale which demonstrates that any quest requiring you to kill someone known as "the Deathless" is going to be, well, a Learning Experience.
Death Becomes Him