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It was more than she expected, but she showed no signs of flinching.
"Five hundred, then," she said, rising as if to conclude the interview. "Will it do, if I let you have it to-morrow?"
"Perfectly. Elizabeth, you are an angel. I can't thank you enough." He advanced towards her with outstretched arms, but with a gesture of repulsion she waved him aside.
"Don't thank me," she said, coldly. "This is a bargain for our mutual advantage. I will fulfil my share of it if you remember yours. And now, as we have nothing more to discuss, I think I will ask you to excuse me." She made him a stately inclination, picked up her book and sailed from the room in undiminished dignity and apparent unconcern.
But when she was alone and had locked herself into her room to think over her misery, then, indeed, the situation stared her in the face in its true colors. Her own words, "I like my freedom," rang mockingly in her ears. She was not free, but a slave; slave of a man who had her in his power, and would use it, as time went on, more and more unscrupulously. This time it was five hundred that he demanded; next time it would be a thousand. What could she do? Somehow or another, he must be satisfied. Anything was better, any sacrifice, any humiliation, than to allow him to go to Gerard with that bare statement of facts, "We were married at Cranston, last July!" The truth, devoid of any of the softening evasions by which she cloaked it to her own mind; the redeeming circ.u.mstances which excused, if they did not justify, her silence.
Her bitterest enemy must admit that the position was a hard one. A contract entered into hastily by a thoughtless girl, on the impulse of the moment; a quarter of an hour in an empty church one summer day; a few words spoken before a sleepy old clergyman and indifferent witnesses--could such things as these have power to ruin one's whole life? No, no--her heart cried out wildly to the contrary. The whole episode seemed, in the retrospect, so dream-like. It was easy to imagine that it had never happened. And yet, had she the courage to ignore it?... And, even if she had, there was always Paul to remind her of it, who would not give her up without a terrible struggle, that must, without fail, come to Gerard's ears.
There was only one hope that she could see, and that was wild and irrational; the hope Paul had himself suggested. If that prediction could be fulfilled! Elizabeth shuddered. It was terrible to think of such a thing; terrible to obtain one's own happiness at the cost of another person's life. She did not really wish Paul dead--that would be wicked. And yet--and yet--the thought pressed irresistibly upon her--if it had to be!--if it had to be! What a blessed relief--what an end to all this misery! "Oh, I do wish it, I do wish it!" she broke out, speaking aloud, unconsciously. "I would give anything in this world to hear of his death."
She stopped, startled at the sound of her own voice. The wish shocked her, even in the moment of expressing it. Her wishes were so often fulfilled--she had an almost superst.i.tious faith in their efficacy. If this one were fulfilled, what then?--For a moment she, thinking it over, balanced possibilities; and then with a stifled cry, fell on her knees and hid her face in her hands.
"Oh, I'm growing so wicked," she sobbed out. "It's because I'm so miserable. Only let me have what I want, and I'll be different; I'll be the kind of woman that he admires; only--I must find a way, I must have what I want--_first_."
_Chapter XXIV_
The next day dawned clear and bright; a beautiful morning in early spring after a night of storm. Upon Elizabeth's spirits as she dressed the weather produced the illogical effect that it does upon most of us. Reviewed by daylight, the situation seemed to her many degrees less desperate. The night before, there had seemed to her only one way out, and that a tragical one; but now there were--there must be--a hundred ways, if only she could gain the time to think of them.
The first thing was to obtain the money; but this in itself was no easy matter. She had promised it to Paul as if it were a mere trifle; yet, as a matter of fact, she was as badly off herself at the time as was to be expected of a young woman who had gone out a great deal, and established and lived up to an expensive reputation for being always well and appropriately gowned.
She reviewed her resources. Mrs. Bobby would have lent her the money at once and asked no questions; but from this course Elizabeth's pride shrank uncontrollably. She preferred to take a sum she had just laid aside to satisfy to some extent the claims of a long-suffering and complaisant dressmaker; but even with this sacrifice determined on, she was still far short of the amount required. She took out, in desperation, her various jewels and trinkets, and looked them over, wondering how much they were worth. There were many pretty things her aunts had given her, none of them probably of any great intrinsic value, and there were the beautiful gifts that Mrs. Bobby had showered upon her; and, finally, there was the string of pearls which she always wore about her neck, one of the few heirlooms which old Madam Van Vorst had once kept under lock and key, and which her daughters had of course made over to Elizabeth. The girl stood now hesitating with the pearls in her hand. She had worn them to every ball that winter, she was wont to say, with her half-joking, half-real touch of superst.i.tion, that they brought her luck; as if, with their possession, something of the spirit of that proud beauty of a by-gone day had entered into her, enabling her to conquer the world in which the older woman had been naturally at home. Would the power leave her with the pearls? The fantastic thought lingered for a moment, and then impatiently she thrust it aside, and put the precious heirloom in with the rest of her possessions, which she had resolved to sacrifice. It was not a moment when she could afford to dally with sentiment.
Yet what a strange, disreputable proceeding it seemed! She was haunted with a vague sense of losing caste, as she took her trinkets to one of the smaller jewelry-shops, and faltered out her improbable tale of their being unbecoming and of no use to her. The jeweler, well used to the straits of fas.h.i.+onable young women, listened without a smile, and offered her on the whole a fair price, though it was much less than she expected. There was nothing that she was not obliged to part with--from the jeweled watch which Mrs. Bobby had given her at Christmas, to the pearls, which proved to be the most valuable of all.
When she left the shop she had deprived herself of all her ornaments, but she held the necessary bribe in her hand, and as the simplest way of conveying it to Halleck, she got on a cable car and went up at once to his studio at Carnegie. There was nothing startling in the proceeding, for he had now a number of pupils, who came to him at his studio; and though the girls whom Elizabeth knew always brought their maids, or a chaperone of some sort, she was not in the mood to waste much thought on conventionalities. Her one idea was to fulfil her share of the bargain before he should, perchance, have repented of his, and she did not think of the chance of meeting any one. Her own affairs had reached a crisis which blinded her to the fact that to other people, the world was progressing peacefully, in the usual order of events.
This dream-like state of indifference to all but the one anxiety continued till she reached Carnegie and was borne up in the elevator to Paul's studio, which was directly opposite to Mr. D'Hauteville's.
And here, for the first time, she paused, seized by a sudden panic.
From behind the closed curtain at the end of the small vestibule, there came the sound of a woman's voice, strained, nasal, raised high in what seemed a tirade of denunciation. To Elizabeth's mind, as she heard it, there arose an involuntary recollection of Ba.s.sett Mills, and of the gaudy little parlor behind her aunt's shop, and some bitter words directed against herself, in what seemed a past period of her history. She stood hesitating, terrified; then the curtain was pushed aside, and a woman came out. It was her cousin Amanda. Her face was white and set, her eyes blazing. She stared at Elizabeth for a moment as if dazed, then brushed past her without a word.
Paul stood on the threshold, a picturesque object in his velveteen coat and turned-down collar, against the artistic background of the luxuriously-furnished studio. He looked flushed, annoyed; the scene which had just taken place had evidently been a trying one. But when he saw Elizabeth standing doubtful in the hall, his face cleared and he came forward to greet her with effusion.
"Darling, how good of you to come here!" He evidently hailed the visit as an overture towards reconciliation. She hastened to disabuse him.
"It was the easiest way to bring this," she said, handing him the package which she had clasped nervously all the way up. "Will you be kind enough, please, to count it and see if it is all right?" It was impossible to speak with more icy brevity, or to impart to any proceeding a more severely business-like air.
He flushed uncomfortably, but did not allow his vexation to interfere with the evident necessity of counting the money. "It is all right,"
he said, biting his lips, as he put down the last roll of bills. "Do you wish me to give you a receipt?" he asked, with fine sarcasm.
"No," said Elizabeth, gravely. "I rely on your word."
Paul bowed. "Thank you," he said. "And now--is there anything else I can do for you?"
"Nothing," said Elizabeth, briefly, "except what you know already. And now, I must go." She moved towards the door, but he placed himself in her way.
"Come, come, Elizabeth," he said. "I'm not going to let you go like that--the first time you make me a visit. Give me a kiss now, just to show that you don't bear malice."
Elizabeth's only reply was a look of ineffable haughtiness. "Will you let me pa.s.s, please?" she said, in a low tone of concentrated wrath, and with an uneasy laugh, he obeyed her.
"What a virago you are!" he said, "almost as bad as your cousin Amanda. It must be the hair," he added, with a sneer, but Elizabeth did not pause to reply. Anxious only to escape, she closed the studio door hastily behind her, and a moment later the elevator bore her swiftly down, and she regained the street, with the feeling of having staved off misfortune, for the moment at least.
She found, when she got home, a note from Gerard, informing her that he had been unexpectedly called out of town for a few days on business, but hoped to see her on his return. There were the flowers, too, which he sent her daily. He had no intention, evidently, of taking her answer of the day before as final. She realized this, with a thrill that held in it more of pleasure than alarm. Still, she was glad that he was out of town. His absence was a reprieve, giving her more of the time she wanted, though it is hard to say what she expected to gain by it. But very little often sufficed to restore Elizabeth's spirits. She was going out to dinner that evening, and she dressed for it with a mind that was comparatively at ease.
But poor Elizabeth's moments of tranquillity just then were short. She was nearly dressed when Celeste entered with the information that a young person had called to see Mademoiselle, who insisted upon seeing her at once. "I told her that Mademoiselle is dressing," said the maid, with expressive gestures; "that she has an engagement, it is most important, but--but she is a most determined young person, she insists that I bring up a message at once."
"It is Amanda, of course," thought Elizabeth, with a terrible sinking of the heart. She had forgotten, until that moment, the meeting in the studio. She glanced at the clock. "I have fifteen minutes, Celeste,"
she said. "Show her up. She may want to see me about something important." The maid departed, and Elizabeth bent down nervously to sort out gloves and handkerchief, wondering as she did now at each unexpected incident, what danger it might portend.
"I thought," said Amanda, "I might come up--seeing we're first cousins." She stood in the door-way, her eyes roaming about the room, taking in every detail--the soft prevailing harmonies of pale blue and rose, the firelight flickering on the tiled hearth, the s.h.i.+ning silver ornaments on the dressing-table, the profusion of bric-a-brac, of cotillion favors, the roses in the china bowl, the general air of luxury--all a fit setting to the proud young beauty, standing before the mirror in her s.h.i.+mmering white satin and laces.
"My, but you look fine!" said Amanda, under her breath. A slightly awed expression crossed her face, modifying the a.s.surance of her entrance. "You're going out?" she asked, looking almost ready to retreat.
"To dinner--yes; but not just yet. Won't you sit down, Amanda?"
Elizabeth said, trying to speak easily. "I--I'm glad to see you. How is Aunt Rebecca, and--every one at Ba.s.sett Mills?"
Amanda sat down, her eyes still wandering eagerly around the room.
Elizabeth, looking at her, saw the unfavorable change that a few months had made. True, she was smartly dressed, with the cheap, tawdry smartness that can be bought ready-made at the shops, and her hat was tilted carefully at the fas.h.i.+onable angle; her hair, growing low about her forehead, had still the pretty, natural wave to it, which was a legacy from the fever, and the general effect at a first glance was striking. But the face, under the jaunty, be-feathered hat, was white and haggard, the eyes had a wild restless look, there were hard, vindictive lines about the mouth. Her hands moved incessantly, plucking at the fringe on her gown.
"Glad? Well, I guess you're not very glad to see me," she said, with a strange, mocking smile, ignoring the latter part of Elizabeth's speech. "There never was much love lost between us, and now--but still I thought I'd pay you a visit. I'm staying with Uncle Ben's folks, and they told me I ought to look up my swell cousin--since you were so sure to want to see me"--she gave a short, jarring laugh. "That stuck-up maid wouldn't believe me--thought I was crazy, when I said we were first cousins. I don't see why--I'm sure I don't look so--so different as all that." Her voice sank into rather a wistful key, and she stole a glance at the long pier-gla.s.s that stood opposite her. "I got my suit at a bargain sale," she said. "The girls said it was--real stylish."
"It's very pretty," said Elizabeth, gently. She glanced at Amanda with a sudden pity that overpowered her first annoyance and alarm at the inopportune visit. What had brought her to town? Some vague, irrational hope of winning back Paul's admiration, perhaps, with this gown that was "real stylish," and the new hat, and the general, tawdry attempt at smartness. It was that, probably, which had taken her to the studio, and no doubt Paul had been disgusted with this attempt to revive an old flirtation, and in his irritation, had convinced her somewhat rudely of his indifference. Poor Amanda! Really she had not seemed quite right in the head since the fever.
"Were you surprised to see me this morning?" said Amanda, watching her and seeming to read her thoughts. "I went to call on another old friend, and--I wasn't welcome"--she gave another jarring laugh, which ended this time in a sob. "He--he didn't seem glad to see me, considering how well he used to know me--once." Her voice broke piteously, she paused for a moment, and then: "I hate him, I hate him!" she broke out, fiercely. "I'd give anything in this world if I'd never known him."
"So would I," said Elizabeth, low and bitterly, and then stopped, frightened at what she had said. But Amanda showed no surprise.
"Ah, you think that now," she said, slowly, "but you didn't use to.
You've got so many rich beaux now that you don't care about him any longer. But I wonder what they'd think--these rich beaux of yours--if they knew how wild you used to be about him, how you went wandering about the country with him, if they knew"--Amanda leaned forward and spoke in an impressive whisper--"if they knew that you have to do what he wants now, that you're afraid of him."
There was a silence. Elizabeth, faint and giddy, sank into the nearest chair, and put up involuntarily her hand to her heart. So here was another danger threatening, another person who knew something--everything, perhaps? Her brain reeled. Amanda leaned back in her chair, watching her triumphantly, a hard, bright glitter in her eyes.
"Amanda!" Elizabeth's white lips tried in vain to frame a coherent question. "Amanda,"--she made another attempt--"what do you mean?"
Amanda smiled contemptuously. "Oh, you know well enough what I mean,"
she said. "Why did you go there this morning when you don't care for him any more, and are sorry you ever knew him, unless you're afraid of him, and have to do what he wants?"
"Oh, is that all?" Elizabeth drew a long sigh of relief. "I went there this morning because--because I wanted to meet a friend"--she broke off in confusion before the look on Amanda's face. Then, with a sudden reaction of feeling, she raised her head haughtily. "It doesn't matter," she said, "_what_ I went there for. It's a--a studio; all his pupils go there. I might have wanted to see him about singing-lessons, about anything.--If that is all you base your suspicions on, Amanda"----She stopped.
"Ah, but if it isn't?" said Amanda, in her impressive whisper, which seemed fraught with a mysterious consciousness of power.
Another silence. The defiant look on Elizabeth's face faded; she leaned back in her chair and half closed her eyes. Ah, she was weary, deathly weary, of these constant nervous shocks. How much did Amanda know--how much? If she could only be sure!
"I think they'd be rather surprised," Amanda went on, in unnaturally quiet tones, "these swell friends of yours, if they knew all about you. They think you very sweet, they give you lots of things"--Amanda's hard, restless eyes roamed again about the room and rested on Elizabeth's beautiful gown. "It don't seem fair," she broke out, suddenly, with a fierce little sob; "it don't seem fair, that you should have so much--and then to be so pretty too, as well as all the rest!"