Don’t Tell Me This Is the True History of the Three Kingdoms! Vol 3 Chapter 11.1

Volume 3 Chapter 11 Part 1: Don’t tell me this is the strike on Yuan Shu (3)

Yuan Shu POV

“Ahahaha~~~ Everyone, charge!!!” I swung the reins in my hands fervently as I felt on top of the world.

How exciting is this! Wearing a royal robe and leading my troops out on an expedition, how cool is this!! This is what it means to be a monarch, this is what it means to be royalty~~~

“My lord, please stop shouting… All the soldiers are looking and it’s really embarra.s.sing for you to act like that~” An administrative official to my left who wore plain clothing and tied her long black hair back which revealed her big forehead said to me.

Why is this fellow acting all proper for.

“Maa… Why don’t we have everyone advance by dog paddling, seems like it would be great fun!”

“Don’t listen to our lord’s orders everyone! Just run normally.” The female warrior on the right superseded my order as though it were something totally normal.

She wore golden yellow unfas.h.i.+onable plate armour and her breastplate was so protruding that it made me mad. She’s already a 20-something old hag, why is she still wearing something so seductive?

“Speaking of which, you 2 should stop calling me lord. It’s time you called me queen.”

“Haa…. But then~~” The female warrior didn’t continue and looked at the female administrative official.

“That’s right, queen is a bit…” The female administrative official laughed dryly before continuing. “That way of addressing is a little embarra.s.sing.”

*Temple vein bursting* No matter how big-hearted I am, I can’t allow someone to bully me like that. “Oi!! Yan Xiang, Ji Ling! How dare you 2 do this to me!! I’ll punish you 2!”

I swung my big sleeves at these 2. It took quite a bit of effort to do so, but it relieved quite a bit of my anger each time.

“Oi oi! My lord, your sleeves are big and heavy, don’t swing them about like that!” Ji Ling received quite a few blows and was angry after a few of them hit her face.

“My lord, I never approved of you declaring yourself Emperor to begin with, but where did you get such a c.u.mbersome set of clothing?” Yan Xiang said as she s.h.i.+elded her forehead.

“What, how has my clothing offended you? I spent good money on this, I won’t allow you 2 to insult it.” I hugged my clothing tightly as though it were my baby while Ji Ling showed a hateful expression.

Hmph! These people don’t know how this set of clothing is laced and studded with gold and silver and how marvelous it is. How could any other clothing compare to it? For the sake of procuring this, do they know how much I have had to fleece the people… I have had to put in so much effort to raise funds for it?

I’m the Emperor, not one of those ordinary people.

“But my lord, the weight from your clothing puts a greater burden on the horses. Given that we are also at the head of the army, this greatly impacts the speed at which we can advance and hence, delays the time at which we can reach Sun Ce’s encampment.”

“So longwinded! Big forehead!”

“Wh! What?! How could my lord say that of me!” She looked devastated, looks like I stepped on a landmine. *s.h.i.+ku*…

You’re already an adult, why are you crying over this?

Really, why are the people beside me always such wet blankets at my happiest times.

Hai, my good mood is totally gone.

*s.h.i.+ku*…

“Lord Yan Xiang, don’t cry. Don’t you understand how our lord is by now?”

Ji Ling, what are you trying to say?

I wanted to give them a good scolding but I started hating myself for some reason after seeing how pitiful Yan Xiang looked.

… Maa, maa, perhaps I was indeed a little overboard just now.

“Yan Xiang, don’t worry about such small issues. That internal chaos is more than what that Sun Ce can handle.” I said, trying to change the topic and improve the situation. “You did well this time, Yan Xiang. I’ll praise you for this.”

(TL: Yuan Shu addresses herself as 本小姐 which is something like this young mistress, which sounds kind of r.e.t.a.r.ded in English, as does most forms of self-address in other languages.)

I’d wanted to stretch my hand out to pat her head but my royal robe, and my height, stopped me from doing so.

“Eh?” Yan Xiang, whose tears were about to stream down, looked at me with surprise before frantically waving her hands. … Servants really are fun to toy with. “Maa, Sun Ce is too inexperienced after all. Employing enemy troops is a precarious move to begin with, but I didn’t think that she didn’t even change the 2 leading generals for the 2 thousand troops she took in. How could we not exploit such a good opportunity?”

Un, I don’t quite get what you just said, but it sounds very impressive.

“But,” Ji Ling, however, frowned at Yan Xiang’s words. “Being ambushed would be disastrous for us now that we’re bringing our 20,000 strong troops on a fast march.”

Yan Xiang gave a wry smile as she sighed. “How could a great general such as yourself say such a thing. Just a moment ago, I gave a good scolding to a low ranked general who said these exact same words to me.” Yan Xiang paused, and pointed at the surroundings which were filled with both tall stout trees and short thinner trees. “We’re doing a fast march through the forests. Though our numbers are great, it will be difficult to figure out which route we will take ahead of time.”

“In the case of an ambush, I highly doubt there is a proper place to ambush from given the environment. Moreover, who is there who could ambush us? Sun Ce’s troops are stymied for now and are unable to act quickly enough.”

“Un, what Lord Yan Xiang says makes sense.”

It always angers me how these 2 fellows always talk about things I can’t quite understand in front of me.

“Oi! You’re only my servants so stop chatting and slacking about already you 2.” I yelled out at them moodily. This move has always been effective with the 2 of them as they shut up immediately. “How much longer until we reach Sun Ce’s encampment huh?”

“Ah, we should be seeing Sun Ce’s main camp soon.” Yan Xiang said as she calmly hooked her hair behind her ear. “When we reach there, all we need to do is charge out from the forest and victory will be ours.”

Un un, I see I see.

I’d thought that Sun Ce was someone impressive but who knew she would fall so easily.

But the great me, Yuan Shu Yuan Gong Lu, has a strong army and a wealth of supplies. Now that I have the Jade Seal, I have followed the will of the people and a.s.sumed the position of Emperor. With Heaven on my side, how could I not easily achieve victory in the first battle I’m personally leading?

We’ll see if Cao Cao and big sister dares to belittle me anymore after I defeat Sun Ce.

Just as I was thinking about what was going to happen after, the sounds of violence and battle could be heard, looks like we are indeed–

“Everyone halt!!”

“Waa!~”

What the heck was Ji Ling thinking, giving the order to halt all of a sudden. It gave me such a fright I held on to the reins too tightly and nearly fell to the ground from the horse’s movements.

“Ji Ling are you crazy!! What is it you’re…”

“Be quiet my lord!” How audacious… She actually ordered me! “Look over there–”

Un?

I looked unwillingly in the direction Ji Ling pointed at. For some reason, the mist that hung about the forest, no only that patch of forest, was exceptionally thick.

Looking out from afar, about a hundred paces or so, I could only see short shrubs and soil dunes.

“I can’t see any…”

“…” Ji Ling put her index finger at her mouth and did a soft ‘sh’ before shouting at the mist. “I am Yuan Shu’s General Ji Ling, who goes there that hides in the dark and dares not report their name??”

…

Everything and anything became silent. Even I was affected by the atmosphere and couldn’t speak. Everyone seemed to be waiting for an answer from the mist.

After a moment, a young girl’s voice replied. “… I am Sun Ce’s subordinate general Cheng Pu Cheng De Mou, and I have come with 5,000 men to meet the Han traitor in battle under the orders of my lord.”

Along with the voice, a sole figure began to appear from within the mist as she walked out which gradually became clearer and we soon saw what she looked like.

The girl wore a rarely seen green coat armour and rode a bay horse. Her dark red, waist length hair was braided into a ponytail and she held a heavy-looking glaive with a dragon design. The glaive’s blade s.h.i.+mmered brightly and glaringly under the sunlight.

I couldn’t see her eyes clearly from where I was, but even so when I looked into them, they seemed to suck me in and when I regained my senses, my body was filled with a chill.

Shortly after she stepped out, many flags and figures appeared from the mist and just a rough count would tell you that they number more than 5,000.

Though I’d heard this name before, I’ve never seen Cheng Pu in person and I never thought that Cheng Pu was such an impressive person.

“Hou~~~” Ji Ling spoke relaxedly but her face was a murderous expression that seemed like that of a demon G.o.d.

“But that’s weird, how could the Sun Ce army find enough spare troops to put together an interception force?” Yan Xiang muttered as sweat streamed down her face at the unforeseen circ.u.mstances before her. “… No, this has to be false. This person definitely does not have 5,000 behind her. My lord, if you order 3,000 men to charge at the mist, we can dispel their schemes. And then, all we need to do is continue on to Sun Ce’s camp…”

“Un? Could Lord Yuan Shu be intending on escaping? To think a descendent of the family that has held prime appointments in the Imperial Court for 4 generations would not dare cross swords with me.” Cheng Pu said mockingly after seeing our side speak quietly.

(TL: The Yuan family was extremely prestigious, wealthy and influential. Each of the 4 patriarchs preceding this generation held 1 of 3 apex Imperial Court positions.)

“What did you say?!”

“Don’t take the bait, my lord!” Yan Xiang said as she grabbed my shoulder.

“Yan Xiang, no more words!” I flung my sleeve and swiped Yan Xiang’s hand off.

“My lord!”

No matter what Yan Xiang says, I can’t hear anything anymore. If it was anything else, I might have tried to endure it but I won’t allow anyone to insult my forebears.

“Alright, I understand. We’ll have a fair and proper battle then.” I looked at Ji Ling who nodded and took her helmet from a subordinate. “As per the rules of engagement, we’ll begin with a duel. Ji Ling~”

“Ji Ling hears and obeys. Jia–”

(TL: Jia is what the ancient Chinese used to command horses to begin galloping.)

Ji Ling pulled the reins on her horse and charged at Cheng Pu.

Ji Ling POV

“Yaa!!!”

“…”

— A crisp *dang* rang out. That was the sound that came from the clash between my trident and Cheng Pu’s Green Dragon Blade.

Wu! Such great strength!

After an introductory blow to test each other’s strength, we turned our horses and faced each other once more.

Kuh… This is bad.

My heart was thumping hard from nervousness and I hurriedly used my left arm to support my trembling right arm.

I was thinking that I could finish Cheng Pu with the first blow but who knew that my arm would be numbed by her.

It was only one blow but her strength was so monstrous that I couldn’t raise my main arm.

“…” Cheng Pu was perfectly calm, as though the blow I dealt her had not affected her in the least.

I forced myself to show a calm expression and switched the trident to my left hand which I was not used to.

Right here and now, I have to face her.

“Ya~~~~~~~~~” I pulled on the reins as I yelled out and charged at Cheng Pu.

Cheng Pu wordlessly charged forth and held her weapon with both hands above her head. Looks like she wants to cleave down with all her strength.

I hurriedly raised my spear with both hands to block it–

No! My right hand can’t move.

Just as I was br.i.m.m.i.n.g with anxiousness, Cheng Pu was right before me, and I could only raise my trident with one arm and hope that I can block it somehow.

“…” She swung down her weapon wordlessly and landed directly on my trident.

“Uwa!” I couldn’t help but let an embarra.s.sing cry at the sheer strength I felt. The power from the swing was so great I was pressed down flat on my horse.

It’s over, I have no way to defend myself!

With just one slice, I’ll–

Just as I was ready to give up, the power that was pressing down on me s.h.i.+fted and I could hear the sound of horse hooves from the side. I got up with great difficulty and saw that Cheng Pu was now 10 paces away from me and had readied her stance for the next bout.

… That b.a.s.t.a.r.d, she actually showed me mercy during a warrior’s duel!

(TL: In the original, Guan Yu and Ji Ling dueled to a draw.)

At this point, my hands were completely numb and if I loosened my grip even a little, the trident would slip off.

“…”

“Haa… Haa…” I’m so exhausted. It feels like I have no strength left in my body. I probably can’t even do a simple stab properly at this point.

I’m already reduced to such a pathetic state even though it’s only been 2 rounds. I must acknowledge the sheer difference in strength between us.

No good, my mood has completely relaxed. Have I given up already?

Maa, it doesn’t matter. We have an absolute advantage with our numerical superiority. At the very most, our troop morale will drop a little.

Right now, all I want is to see my lord’s face.

My eyes are getting itchy from sweat, and it feels like I’ll probably cry if I’m not careful.

I, Ji Ling, have fought battles from north to south, and though my lord is immature, she was worth dedicating my life to.

But at the very end, 20-something year old me can’t even hold off someone in her teens. What a farce.

… Un? Wait a minute.

Cheng Pu is in her teens?

… Impossible! Cheng Pu should be about the same age as Sun Jian!

I was perplexed at this conflict between what I saw and what I knew and turned to look at the troops in the mist instinctively.

I couldn’t see it clearly but these were definitely not Sun Ce’s troops. And emblazoned on the flags was a very clear ‘曹’.

So that’s it!!! This wasn’t Sun Ce’s army to begin with, it was Cao Cao’s army.

I’m not an administrative official so I can’t understand why the Cao army would want to conceal its ident.i.ty. But I do know one thing, based on my gut, which was probably something that even an ordinary person could sense.

And it is with this sense that I faced the tiny Emperor sitting at the head of the army and yelled–

“Be careful my lord!”