Don’t Tell Me This Is the True History of the Three Kingdoms! Vol 3 Chapter 1

“Yuan Shu declared herself Emperor?!”

“Un, Yuan Shu got hold of the Imperial Jade Seal.” Today, Meng De had summoned me to tell me this.

(TL: A reminder that Yuan Shu is Yuan Shao’s loli little sister.)

Though I’d known that this event was bound to happen about now, I was still surprised. After all–

“But wasn’t the Jade Seal… With uncle Sun Jian?”

Could it be that as expected…

“Un? Xuan De, you don’t know yet right?” Meng De began to explain on seeing my reaction. “When Sun Jian pa.s.sed through Liu Biao’s territory while carrying the Jade Seal, he was ambushed By Huang Zu.”

“… Hai! Why didn’t he listen to what I told him then?!” I exclaimed in frustrated. If only I had been more adamant back then.

“Thereafter, his subordinates– Cheng Pu and Han Dang, brought the Jade Seal back and his eldest daughter Sun Ce inherited his position. But because they do not have enough power, she exchanged the Jade Seal for 3,000 troops so that she can suppress the other feudal lords in Jiangdong.”

(TL: This is rather accurate. And 3,000 goes to show how desperate Sun Ce was.)

“…”

“Un? Xuan De, what’s wrong?”

Though I’d known that Sun Jian was destined to meet his end at this time, to have the daughter complex Sun Jian suddenly die like that… I can’t quite accept the demise of my former comrade so easily.

Leaving aside my feelings, I wonder how sad it must be for his daughters?

“No, I just feel that it’s a pity.” I replied after thinking it over. “Uncle Sun Jian isn’t very old, and now he’s gone.”

“Un, I think that he is one of the rare people with true loyalty to the Han, but at the tender age of 30-odd…” Meng De sighed as she said so. “But we can take comfort in the fact that his daughter has taken revenge for him already.”

“Maa, that certainly is good.”

Sun Ce huh, I want to see what she’s like.

“Back to the problem of Yuan Shu declaring herself as Emperor. I am actually very concerned about this problem.” Meng De said with a serious look as she folded her hands together.

“Un, the Jade Seal that is the national symbol is with her after all.”

“Right, that’s the crux of the issue.” Meng De nodded.

“It was fine while it was in Sun Jian’s hands as he is a loyal feudal lord after all but now that it’s with Yuan Shu, things can only become as comedic as they are now.” Meng De said with an emphasis on ‘comedic’.

Indeed, it’s as Meng De said, any feudal lord in possession of the Jade Seal would eventually declare themselves to be the legitimate Emperor.

And not that the Jade Seal is with Yuan Shu, she won’t be herself if she doesn’t do it.

But the Han was now in a somewhat stable position, and Yuan Shu’s forces are not the most formidable nor does she have the support of the people. Even though she had neither popularity nor power, even though the political landscape was not favourable for her, she still had the audacity to declare herself Emperor. This is truly a comedy.

“And you summoned me to…”

“Un, let me be frank. Dealing with Ben Chu alone is more than enough to cause me a headache and I don’t know when she will attack. With my forces as they are now, I cannot face her head on and can only fortify my positions here.” It’s rare to hear Meng De say that she’s in a difficult position. “So this time I want to ask you for help.”

(TL: In the original, it was Liu Bei who seized the opportunity and proposed to go instead as he wanted to escape Cao Cao’s confinement.)

“… Help with Yuan Shu, is it?” I asked.

Meng De nodded, and took out the map from behind her. “Yuan Shu is now based around the Shouchun and Wan areas in Huainan, so Xuan De, go and attack Wan city which is slightly nearer.”

Meng De pointed at the corresponding points on the map as she gave these instructions. But from this map, the Central Plains really is small huh. I didn’t think that it would require so much effort just to conquer a county city.

“Un, then for troops I’ll be using the few hundred I started out with.”

“Xuan De, I would be pretty embarra.s.sed to say that I only have just a few hundred men after fighting battles all over the country.” Meng De said with a saddened expression as she came over and patted my shoulder.

d.a.m.n it! Just because I haven’t been recruiting huh~~

“You bring what troops you have and I’ll give you another 3,000.” Meng De said as she walked to her desk and began writing the official doc.u.ments. “It’s been 3 days since Yuan Shu has declared herself Emperor, I don’t think…”

“Imperial Chancellor, I hard that Yuan Shu has lost Wan city.” Just then, Dian Wei came barging in and said so with a delighted look.

Lost Wan city? It’s only been 3 days!

“Ah? Lost Wan city?” Not just me, Meng De was suspicious about this victory report. “Dian Wei, are you certain that this is not false information? Or could this be some weird scheme by Yuan Shu to misdirect us?”

“Umm, I don’t think so.” Dian Wei backed up a bit as she was a little overwhelmed by Meng De’s pressure. “Sun Ce was the one who attacked Wan city, and Xiahou Yuan, who we sent earlier, a.s.sisted her, so the report is definitely accurate.”

“I only gave Xiahou Yuan 10,000 troops, how could she have conquered Wan city completely?”

Then why were you expecting me to do so with just 3,000 huh~~~

(TL: Here’s a wooden sword, now go defeat that tank.)

“So it’s Sun Ce huh… As expected, it was a matter of time before she avenged her father huh. Not only that, she was able to take Wan city, which is a strategically important point.” Meng De nodded, seems like she’s satisfied at the result. “Well then, no matter what, Yuan Shu’s forces should have been significantly weakened now.”

“Then does that mean I don’t need to go to Wan city anymore?”

Though we’re basically sitting around doing nothing in Xuchang, going into battle is not something I look forward to very much as I don’t like making everyone suffer from fatigue from fighting.

“Ah, that’s right.” As she said so, she raised her brush and wrote another doc.u.ment. “I’ll give you another 7,000, so the total you have is 10,000, for you to go attack Shouchun.”

“… Why do I still have to go.” I grumbled softly as I tried to grasp around the concept of 10,000 troops. “But 10,000 huh… I’m not sure I’m able to effectively command them all.”

I’m not Han Xin. Just bringing more troops won’t mean anything if I can’t use them effectively.

(TL: Han Xin was a brilliant strategist that served Liu Bang.)

“Everyone has to start off somewhere, n.o.body started off with leading tens of thousands of troops.” Meng De said as she looked at me, probably thinking back to when she first commanded an army. “And you have very good subordinates under you who you can share the responsibility with.”

I’m really sorry for not improving at all even though we raised armies at about the same time.

(TL: Not sure what he’s blaming himself for. Cao Cao served as an officer for years in the army before this.)

“Maa, I’ll do my best.”

Now that it has come to this point, how can I not agree.

“Ah. By the way, Yuan Shu herself is in Shouchun along with her self-professed 20,000 strong army.” Meng De said nonchalantly and relaxedly. “Maa, all this isn’t important anyway.”

“How is it not important!”

“Un? Why are you so agitated for?”

How can I not be agitated?!

“20,000? I only have 10,000 and I’ll probably have to lay siege on her city, how am I going to outlast her in a battle of attrition!”

(TL: Here’s a rifle, now go defeat that fighter jet.)

“Honestly, that 20,000 figure is definitely fake, and all she’s done is just put up more flags . Don’t mind it too much.” Meng De said with a wry smile. “The actual number should be just 20 or 30,000. Moreover, with Yuan Shu’s personality, she will definitely not stay put when you launch an offensive, and will definitely meet you in battle outside the city.”

“Haa…”

I was still a bit worried that Meng De’s confidence was misplaced but seems like her conviction behind her decision was born from a thorough a.n.a.lysis of Yuan Shu.

“And you might come face to face with Sun Ce as well. When the time comes, don’t forget to forge a good relations.h.i.+p with her. That will go a long way in resolving the issue of which city goes to whom.”

“Even if Meng De doesn’t tell me to, I know what to do, though I won’t do it especially for the sake of dividing territories.”

Speaking of which, why does it seem like I’m Meng De’s subordinate?

“Un, that’s all then. After you have done your preparations, you may set off for Shouchun. I’ll take care of the matter of reporting to Emperor Xian of Han. In any case, the matter of Yuan Shu cannot be left for too long and should be addressed immediately if possible.” Meng De sank into a chair as she finished. “Apologies, allow me to have a nap.”

Meng De does seem tired, and it’s not just today either.

“Lord Liu Bei, let’s leave.” Dian Wei lightly pulled my sleeve as she said so.

“Un.”

Meng De really needs a good rest.

After we left the room, Dian Wei gave a long exhalation all of a sudden.

“Un? What’s wrong, General Dian Wei?”

“No, nothing much.” Dian Wei said as she waved her hands. “I just feel that my lord always pushes herself too much, but she never relies on us whenever she makes a decision.”

“…”

“Of course, it’s not like I have a problem with that since my lord’s decisions have always been correct. It’s just that…” Dian Wei paused, as though she wasn’t sure how to put her thoughts into words. “My lord’s way of thinking is a little hard to understand sometimes.”

As expected, Meng De’s father was spot on with his judgement of her. Meng De is very unwilling to expose her thoughts to others.

—- I don’t trust anyone.

Perhaps this is the best portrayal for Meng De’s heart of hearts.

“Then General Dian Wei, do you trust Meng De?”

“I do!”

Unlike before, this line came out without hesitation from the pint-sized Dian Wei.

“Then don’t think too much about it. I’m not too clear about how Meng De thinks myself but she’s Meng De so it’ll be alright.”

‘Meng De’, just hearing her name is enough to inspire confidence.

“… That’s right, I think so too.” Dian Wei said after thinking for a while and then smiled. Looks like she’s pleased with her lord. “Well then Lord Liu Bei, I have something to attend to so I’ll be off now.”

“Un.”

Meng De really has some good companions too huh.

Oh right!

“General Dian Wei!”

“Un?”

I hesitated for a moment, or perhaps I have always been hesitating, as I don’t know if zi should talk about this matter. But in the end, I feel that it is better to do so. “It’s just a feeling of mine… But I think Meng De should be extra careful these days.”

“What could…” Dian Wei did not pay much heed to what I said until she detected my seriousness from looking at me. “Un, I will take note of it.”

“Yo, my lord, you’re back, what did Lord Cao Cao summon you for?”

After returning to the inn, I found only Zhang Liao and the Xu state 3.

“Ah, looks like we’ll be heading for Shouchun soon, and this time, it will be a real battle.” I sat on the wooden bed, tired out after walking all day, and lay down. “Speaking of which, why is just you 4? Where are the rest?”

“The rest went to ride horses. My back has been hurting these few days so I didn’t go.” Zhang Liao gave a bitter smile as she rubbed her back. “But Shouchun huh~~ Seems like Yuan Shu over there declared herself Emperor.”

“Un, that’s right. That rich second young miss actually did that in a time like this.” I said as I waved my hand, and looked at the Xu state 3. “Then what about you 3?”

“We.” “Are.” “Administrative officials.”

“Un, good excuse.” Maa, since they actually are doing administrative work, then it can’t be helped.

“By the way, my lord, you have been lying down on my thighs.”

“– Waa! I’m sorry, I’m getting up now!”

“No, you can just stay as you are.” After hearing Gong You say so, I finally realised that the sensation my head felt when I lay down was much softer than usual.

“Hai, Gong You is still the best at calculations huh.” “I always though Xuan De would lie on my side.”

For some reason, Zi Hong and xiao Yong started saying some inexplicable words.

“Alright, though I didn’t partic.i.p.ate, I’m still the judge. When the others come back, I’ll be in charge of announcing the results.” Zhang Liao said as she took out a small notebook and started writing in it. “The ones who guessed right were Yi De and my lord (Feng Xian), okay. The rest will have to treat them dinner.”

“… What are you all up to?” I couldn’t help but ask.

“No.” “We’re not up to much.” “Just betting on the position Xuan De would lie down on.”

… Are you all that bored? Can you all don’t use me as a racing horse or slot machine? How about playing something more healthy, like dice.

Un?

From my vantage point, I could clearly see a slip of paper being slipped through the crack under the door.

“This is…” I got up and walked to the door and picked up the slip of paper, and opened it up–

—- It happens next week.

“…”

Though I have no proof of it, I’m very sure that State Uncle wrote this.

“My lord, what is the matter?”

“Ah, no, it’s nothing.”

Yuan Shu declared herself Emperor and this side is moving as well.

Waves of uneasiness swirled in my heart as I realised I was faced with the relentless march of history.