April's Lady - LightNovelsOnl.com
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It is just at the moment when Mrs. Blake is holding forth on Lady Baltimore's affairs to Mrs. Monkton that Baltimore enters the smaller drawing-room, where he knows he will be sure to meet his wife at this hour.
It is far in the afternoon, still the spring suns.h.i.+ne is streaming through the windows. Lady Baltimore, in a heavy tea gown of pale green plush, is sitting by the fire reading a book, her little son upon the hearth rug beside her. The place is strewn with bricks, and the boy, as his father enters, looks up at him and calls to him eagerly to come and help him. At the sound of the child's quick, glad voice a pang contracts Baltimore's heart. The child----He had forgotten him.
"I can't make this castle," says Bertie, "and mother isn't a bit of good. Hers always fall down; come you and make me one."
"Not now," says Baltimore. "Not to-day. Run away to your nurse. I want to speak to your mother."
There is something abrupt and jerky in his manner--something strained, and with sufficient temper in it to make the child cease from entreaty.
The very pain Baltimore, is feeling has made his manner harsher to the child. Yet, as the latter pa.s.ses him obediently, he seizes the small figure in his arms and presses him convulsively to his breast. Then, putting him down, he points silently but peremptorily to the door.
"Well?" says Lady Baltimore. She has risen, startled by his abrupt entrance, his tone, and more than all, by that last brief but pa.s.sionate burst of affection toward the child. "You, wish to speak to me--again?"
"There won't be many more opportunities," says he, grimly. "You may safely give me a few moments to-day. I bring you good news. I am going abroad. At once. Forever."
In spite of the self-control she has taught herself, Lady Baltimore's self-possession gives way. Her brain seems to reel. Instinctively she grasps hold of the back of a tall _prie-dieu_ next to her.
"Hah! I thought so--I have touched her at last, through her pride,"
thinks Baltimore, watching her with a savage satisfaction, which, however, hurts him horribly. And after all he was wrong, too. He had touched her, indeed; but it was her heart, not her pride, he had wounded.
"Abroad?" echoes she, faintly.
"Yes; why not? I am sick of this sort of life. I have decided on flinging it up."
"Since when have you come to this decision?" asks she presently, having conquered her sudden weakness by a supreme effort.
"If you want day and date I'm afraid I shan't be able to supply you. It has been growing upon me for some time--the idea of it, I mean--and last night you brought it to perfection."
"I?"
"Have you already forgotten all the complimentary speeches you made me?
They"--with a sardonic smile--"are so sweet to me that I shall keep them ripe in my memory until death overtakes me--and after it, I think! You told me, among many other wifely things--if my mind does not deceive me--that you wished me well out of your life, and Lady Swansdown with me."
"That is a direct and most malicious misapplication of my words," says she, emphatically.
"Is it? I confess that was my reading of them. I accepted that version, and thinking to do you a good turn, and relieve you of both your _betes noire_ at once, I proposed to Lady Swansdown last night that she should accompany me upon my endless travels."
There is a long, long pause, during which Lady Baltimore's face seems to have grown into marble. She takes a step forward now. Through the stern pallor of her skin her large eyes seem to gleam like fire.
"How dare you!" she says in a voice very low but so intense that it rings through the room. "How dare you tell me of this! Are you lost to all shame? You and she to go--to go away together! It is only what I have been antic.i.p.ating for months. I could see how it was with you. But that you should have the insolence to stand before me--" she grows almost magnificent in her wrath--"and declare your infamy aloud! Such a thought was beyond me. There was a time when I would have thought it beyond you!"
"Was there?" says he. He laughs aloud.
"There, there, there!" says she, with a rather wild sort of sigh. "Why should I waste a single emotion upon you. Let me take you calmly, casually. Come--come now." It is the saddest thing in the world to see how she treads down the pa.s.sionate, most natural uprisings within her against the injustice of life: "Make me at least _au courant_ with your movements, you and she will go--where?"
"To the devil, you thought, didn't you?" says he. "Well, you will be disappointed as far as she is concerned. I maybe going. It appears she doesn't think it worth while to accompany me there or anywhere else."
"You mean that she refused to go with you?"
"In the very baldest language, I a.s.sure you. It left nothing to be desired, believe me, in the matter of lucidity. 'No,' she would not go with me. You see there is not only one, but two women in the world who regard me as being utterly without charm."
"I commiserate you!" says she, with a bitter sneer. "If, after all your attention to her, your friend has proved faithless, I----"
"Don't waste your pity," says he, interrupting her rather rudely. "On the whole, the decision of my 'friend,' as you call her, was rather a relief to me than otherwise. I felt it my duty to deprive you of her society"--with an unpleasant laugh--"and so I asked her to come with me.
When she declined to accompany me she left me free to devote myself to sport."
"Ah! you refuse to be corrupted?" says she, contemptuously.
"Think what you will," says he, restraining himself with determination.
"It doesn't matter in the least to me now. Your opinion I consider worthless, because prejudiced--as worthless as you consider me. I came here simply to tell you of my determination to go abroad."
"You have told me of that already. Lady Swansdown having failed you, may I ask"--with studied contempt--"who you are going to take with you now?"
"What do you mean?" says he, wheeling round to her. "What do you mean by that? By heavens!" laying his hands upon her shoulders, and looking with fierce eyes into her pale face. "A man might well kill you!"
"And why?" demands she, undauntedly. "You would have taken her--you have confessed so much--you had the coa.r.s.e courage to put it into words. If not her, why"--with a shrug--"then another!"
"There! think as you will," says he, releasing her roughly. "Nothing I could say would convince or move you. And yet, I know it is no use, but I am determined I will leave nothing unsaid. I will give you no loop-hole. I asked her to go with me in a moment of irritation, of loneliness, if you will; it is hard for a man to be forever outside the pale of affection, and I thought--well, it is no matter what I thought.
I was wrong it seems. As for caring for her, I care so little that I now feel actually glad she had the sense to refuse my senseless proposal.
She would have bored me, I think, and I should undoubtedly have bored her. The proposition was made to her in a moment of folly."
"Oh, folly?" says she with a curious laugh.
"Well, give it any other name you like. And after all," in a low tone, "you are right. It was not the word. If I had said despair I should have been nearer the mark."
"There might even be another word," said she slowly.
"Even if there were," says he, "the occasion for it is of your making.
You have thrown me; you must be prepared, therefore, to accept the consequences."
"You have prepared me for anything," says she calmly, but with bitter meaning.
"See here," says he furiously. "There may still be one thing left for you which I have not prepared. You have just asked me who I am going to take with me when I leave this place forever. Shall I answer you?"
Something in his manner terrifies her; she feels her face blanching.
Words are denied her, but she makes a faint movement to a.s.sent with her hand. What is he going to say!
"What if I should decide, then, on taking my son with me?" says he violently. "Who is there to prevent me? Not you, or another. Thus I could cut all ties and put you out of my life at once and forever!"
He had certainly not calculated on the force of his words or his manner.
It had been a mere angry suggestion. There was no crudity in Baltimore's nature. He had never once permitted himself to dwell upon the possibility of separating the boy from his mother. Such terrible revenge as that was beyond him, his whole nature would have revolted against it.
He had spoken with pa.s.sion, urged by her contempt into a desire to show her where his power lay, without any intention of actually using it. He meant perhaps to weaken her intolerable defiance, and show her where a hole in her armor lay. He was not prepared for the effect of his words.
An ashen shade has overspread her face; her expression has become ghostly. As though her limbs have suddenly given way under her, she falls against the mantel-piece and clings to it with trembling fingers.
Her eyes, wild and anguished, seek his.
"The child!" gasps she in a voice of mortal terror. "The child! Not the child! Oh! Baltimore, you have taken all from me except that. Leave me my child!"
"Good heavens! Don't look at me like that," exclaims he, inexpressibly shocked--this sudden and complete abandonment of herself to her fear has horrified him. "I never meant it. I but suggested a possibility. The child shall stay with you. Do you hear me, Isabel! The child is yours!
When I go, I go alone!"