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Flora Lyndsay.
by Susan Moodie.
VOL 1.
CHAPTER I.
A MATRIMONIAL DIALOGUE.
"Flora, have you forgotten the talk we had about emigration, the morning before our marriage?" was a question rather suddenly put to his young wife, by Lieutenant Lyndsay, as he paused in his walk to and fro the room. The fact is, that he had been pondering over that conversation for the last hour.
It had long been forgotten by his wife; who, seated upon the sofa with a young infant of three years old in her lap, was calmly watching its sleeping face with inexpressible delight. She now left off her maternal studies; and looked up at her husband, with an inquiring glance,-
"Why do you ask, dear John?"
"Are you turned Quaker, Flora, that you cannot give one a _direct_ answer?"
"I have not forgotten it. But we have been so happy ever since, that I have never given it a second thought. What put it into your head just now?"
"That child-and thinking how I could provide for her, in any other way."
"Dear little pet! She cannot add much to our expenses." And the mother bent over her sleeping child, and kissed its soft, velvet cheek, with a zest that mothers alone know.
"Not at present. But the little pet will in time grow into a tall girl; and other little pets may be treading upon her footsteps; and they must all be clothed, and fed, and educated."
Flora, in her overflowing happiness, had dismissed all such cruel realities from her mind.
"Emigration is a terrible word, John. I wish that it could be expunged from our _English_ dictionary."
"I am afraid, my dear girl, that you are destined to learn a practical ill.u.s.tration of its meaning. Nay, don't look so despondingly. If you intended to remain in England, you should not have married a _poor_ man."
"Don't say that, John, or you will make me miserable. Our marriage made me rich in treasures, which gold could never buy. But seriously, I do not see this urgent necessity for taking such a hazardous step. I know that we are not rich-that our expectations on that score for the future are very limited. We are both the younger children of large families, whose wealth and consequence is now a thing of the past. We have nothing to hope or antic.i.p.ate from rich relations; but we have enough to be comfortable, and are surrounded with many blessings. Our little girl, whose presence seems to have conjured before you the gaunt image of poverty, has added greatly to our domestic happiness. Yes, little Miss Innocence! you are awake, are you? Come, crow to papa, and drive these ugly thoughts out of his head."
The good father kissed fondly the young thing seducingly held up to him.
But he did not yield to the temptation, or swerve from his purpose, though Flora kissed _him_, with eyes brimful of tears.
"We are indeed happy, love. Too happy, I might say. But will it last?"
"Why not?"
"Our income is _very_ small?" with a deep sigh.
"It is enough for our present wants. And we have no debts."
"Thanks to your prudent management. Yes, we have no debts. But it has been a hard battle, only gained by great self-denial, and much pinching.
We have kind friends, too. But Flora, I am too proud to be indebted to friends for the common necessaries of life; and without doing something to improve our scanty means, it might come to that. The narrow income which has barely supplied our wants this year, without the inc.u.mbrance of a family, will not do so next. There remains no alternative but to _emigrate_!"
Flora felt that this was pressing her hard. All her affectionate ingenuity could not furnish an argument against such home truths. "Let us drop this hateful subject," said she, hastily; "I cannot bear to think about it."
"But, my dear girl, we must force ourselves to think about it, calmly and dispa.s.sionately; and having determined which is the path of duty, we must follow it out, without any reference to our own likes and dislikes.
Our marriage would have been a most imprudent one, had it been contracted on any other terms; and we are both to blame that we have loitered away so many months of valuable time in happy ease, when we should have been earning independence for ourselves and our family."
"You may be right, John,-yes, I know that you are right. But it is no such easy matter to leave your home and country, and the dear friends whose society renders life a blessing and poverty endurable-to abandon a certain good for an uncertain better, to be sought for among untried difficulties. I would rather live in a cottage in England, upon brown bread and milk, than occupy a palace on the other side of the Atlantic."
"This sounds very prettily in poetry, Flora; but, my dear girl, life is made up of stern realities, and it is absolutely necessary for us to provide against the dark hour before it comes suddenly upon us. Our future prospects press upon my heart and brain too forcibly to be neglected. I have thought long and painfully upon the subject, and I have come to the resolution to emigrate this spring."
"So soon?"
"The sooner the better. The longer we defer it, the more difficulties we shall have to encounter. The legacy left you by your aunt will pay our expenses out, and enable us, without touching my half-pay, to purchase a farm in Canada."
"Canada!"
Flora's eye brightened.
"Oh, I am so glad that it is not to the Cape of Good Hope!"
"In this decision, Flora, I have yielded to _your_ wishes. My _own_ inclinations would lead me back to a country where I have dear friends, a large tract of land, and where some of the happiest years of my life were spent. You are not wise, Flora, to regard the Cape with such horror. No person would delight more in the beautiful and romantic scenery of that country than yourself. You have taken up a foolish prejudice against the land I love."
"It is not that, dear John. But you know, I have such a terror of the wild beasts-those dreadful snakes and lions! I never should dare to stir beyond the garden, for fear of being stung or devoured. And then, I have been bored to death about the Cape, by our good friends the P--'s, till I hate the very name of the place!"
"You will perhaps one day find out your error, Flora; and your fears are perfectly absurd! Not wis.h.i.+ng to render your emigration more painful, by taking you to a country to which you are so averse, I have made choice of Canada, hoping that it might be more to your taste. The only obstacle in the way, is the reluctance you feel at leaving your friends. Am I less dear to you, Flora, than friends and country?"
This was said so kindly, and with such an affectionate earnestness for her happiness more than his own-for it was no small sacrifice to Lyndsay to give up going back to the Cape-that it overcame all Flora's obstinate scruples.
"Oh, no, no!-you are more to me than all the world! I will try and reconcile myself to any change, for your sake!"
"Shall I go first, and leave you with your mother until I have arranged matters in Canada?"
"Such a separation would be worse than death! I would rather encounter a thousand dangers, than remain in England without you! If it must be, I will never say another word against it!"
Here followed a heavy sigh. The young husband kissed the tears from her cheek, and whispered-
"That she was his dear, good girl."
And Flora would have followed him to the deserts of Arabia.
"I have had a long conversation with a very sensible, practical man,"
continued Lyndsay, "who has lately come to England upon colonial business. He has been a settler for some years in Canada, and the accounts he has given me of the colony are so favourable, and hold out such encouragement of ultimate success and independence, that they have decided me in my choice of making a trial of the backwoods. I promised to meet him this morning at the Crown Inn (where he puts up), to look over maps and plans, and have some further talk upon the subject. I thought, dear, that it was better for me to consult you upon the matter before I took any decided steps. You have borne the ill news better than I expected: so keep up your spirits until I return, which will not be long."
Flora remained in deep thought for some time after the door had closed upon her husband. She could now recal every word of that eventful conversation, which they had held together the morning before their marriage, upon the subject of emigration. In the happy prospect of becoming his wife, it had not then appeared to her so terrible.
Faithfully had he reminded her of the trials she must expect to encounter, in uniting her destiny to a poor gentleman, and had pointed out emigration as the only remedy for counteracting the imprudence of such a step; and Flora, full of love and faith, was not hard to be persuaded. She considered that to be his wife, endowed as he was by nature with so many moral and intellectual qualities, with a fine face and n.o.ble form, would make her the richest woman in the world: that there was in him a mine of mental wealth, which could never decrease, but which time and experience would augment, and come what might, she in the end was sure to be the gainer.
She argued thus:-"Did I marry a man whom I could not love, merely for his property, and the position he held in society, misfortune might deprive him of these, and a disagreeable companion for life would remain to remind me constantly of my choice. But a generous, talented man like Lyndsay, by industry and prudence may become rich, and then the most avaricious worlding would applaud the step I had taken."
We think after all, that Flora reasoned wisely, and, acting up to her convictions, did right. The world, we know, would scarcely agree with us; but in matters of the heart, the world is rarely consulted.