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Letter cx.
_Olivia to Mr L----._
Richmond.
Barbarous man! with what cold cruelty you plunge a dagger into my heart!
Leonora is with you!--Leonora! Then I am undone. Yes, she will--she has resumed all her power, her rights, her habitual empire over your heart.
Wretched Olivia!--But you say it is your wish to secure my happiness, you bid me allow you to believe it is in your power. What phrases!--You will sail, _according to your promise_.--Then nothing but your honour binds you to Olivia. And even now, at this guilty instant, in your secret soul, you wish, you expect from my offended pride, from my disgusted delicacy, a renunciation of this promise, a release from all the ties that bind you to me. You are right: this is what I ought to do; what I would do, if love had not so weakened my soul, so prostrated my spirit, rendered me so abject a creature, that _I cannot_ what _I would_.
I must love on--female pride and resentment call upon me in vain. I cannot hate you. Even by the feeble tie, which I see you long to break, I must hold, rather than let you go for ever. I will not renounce your promise. I claim it. I adjure you, by all which a man of honour holds most sacred, to quit England the moment your health will allow you to sail. No equivocating with your conscience!--I hold you to your word.
Oh, my dearest L----! to feel myself reduced to use such language to you, to find myself clinging to that last resource of s.h.i.+pwrecked love, _a promise_! It is with unspeakable agony I feel all this; lower I cannot sink in misery. Raise me, if indeed you wish my happiness--raise me! it is yet in your power. Tell me, that my too susceptible heart has mistaken phantoms for realities--tell me, that your last was not colder than usual; yes, I am ready to be deceived. Tell me that it was only the languor of disease; a.s.sure me that my rival forced her way only to your presence, that she has not won her easy way back to your heart--a.s.sure me that you are impatient once more to see your own
Olivia.
Letter cxi.
_Leonora to her mother._
Yarmouth.
My dearest Mother,
Can you believe or imagine that I am actually unwilling to say or to think that Mr L---- is quite well? yet this is the fact. Such is the inconsistency and weakness of our natures--of my nature, I should say.
But a short time ago I thought that no evil could be so great as his danger; now that danger is past, I dread to hear him say that he is perfectly recovered. The moment he is able he goes to Russia; that is decided irrevocably. The promise has been claimed and repeated. A solemn promise cannot be broken for any human consideration. I should despise him if he broke it; but can I love him for keeping it? His mind is at this instant agitated as much as mine is--more it cannot. Yet I ought to be better able to part with him now than when we parted before, because I have now at least the consolation of knowing that he leaves me against his will--that his heart will not go from me. This time I cannot be deceived; I have had the most explicit a.s.surances of his _undivided_ love. And indeed I was never deceived. All the appearances of regret at parting with me were genuine. The general witnessed the consequent struggle in Mr L----'s mind, and this fever followed.
I will endeavour to calm and content myself with the possession of his love, and with the a.s.surance that he will return to me as soon as possible. As soon as possible! but what a vague hope! He sails with the first fair wind. What a dreadful certainty! Perhaps to-morrow! Oh, my dearest mother, perhaps to-night!
Leonora L----.
Letter cxij.
_General B---- to the d.u.c.h.ess of ----._
Yarmouth.
My dear Madam,
To-day Mr L----, finding himself sufficiently recovered, gave orders to all his suite to embark, and the wind being fair, determined to go on board immediately. In the midst of the bustle of the preparations for his departure, Lady Leonora, exhausted by her former activity, and unable to take any part in what was pa.s.sing, sat silent, pale and motionless, opposite to a window, which looked out upon the sea; the vessel in which her husband was to sail lay in sight, and her eyes were fixed upon the streamers, watching their motion in the wind.
Mr L---- was in his own apartment writing letters. An express arrived; and among other letters for the English amba.s.sador to Russia, there was a large packet directed to Lady Leonora L----. Upon opening it the crimson colour flew into her face, and she exclaimed, "Olivia's letters!--Lady Olivia ----'s letters to Mad. de P----. Who could send these to me?"
"I give you joy with all my heart!" cried I; "no matter how they come--they come in the most fortunate moment possible. I would stake my life upon it they will unmask Olivia at once. Where is Mr L----? He must read them this moment."
I was hurrying out of the room to call my friend, but Lady Leonora stopped my career, and checked the transport of my joy.
"You do not think, my dear general," said she, "that I would for any consideration do so dishonourable an action as to read these letters?"
"Only let Mr L---- read them," interrupted I, "that is all I ask of your ladys.h.i.+p. Give them to me. For the soul of me I can see nothing dishonourable in this. Let Lady Olivia be judged by her own words. Your ladys.h.i.+p shall not be troubled with her trash, but give the letters to me, I beseech you."
"No, I cannot," said Lady Leonora steadily. "It is a great temptation; but I ought not to yield." She deliberately folded them up in a blank cover, directed them to Lady Olivia, and sealed them; whilst I, half in admiration and half in anger, went on expostulating.
"Good G.o.d! this is being too generous! But, my dear Lady Leonora, why will you sacrifice yourself? This is misplaced delicacy! Show those letters, and I'll lay my life Mr L---- never goes to Russia."
"My dear friend," said she, looking up with tears in her eyes, "do not tempt me beyond my power to resist. Say no more." At this instant Mr L---- came into the room; and I am ashamed to confess to your grace, I really was so little master of myself, that I was upon the point of seizing Olivia's letters, and putting them into his hands. "L----," said I, "here is your admirable wife absurdly, yes, I must say it, absurdly standing upon a point of honour with one who has none! That packet which she has before her----"
Lady Leonora imposed silence upon me by one of those looks which no man can resist.
"My dear Leonora, you are right," said Mr L----; "and you are almost right, my dear general: I know what that packet contains; and without doing anything dishonourable, I hold myself absolved from my promise; I shall not go to Russia, my dearest wife!" He flew into her arms--and I left them. I question whether they either of them felt much more than I did.
For some minutes I was content with knowing that these things had really happened, that I had heard Mr L---- say he was absolved from all promises, and that he would not go to Russia; but how did all this happen so suddenly?--How did he know the contents of Olivia's letters, and without doing anything dishonourable? There are some people who cannot be perfectly happy till they know the _rationale_ of their happiness. I am one of these. I did not feel "a sober certainty of waking bliss," till I read a letter which Mr L----received by the same express that brought Olivia's letters, and which he read while we were debating. I beg your grace's pardon if I am too minute in explanation; but I do as I would be done by. The letter was from one of the private secretaries, who is, I understand, a relation and friend of Lady Leonora L----. As the original goes this night to Lady Olivia, I send your grace a copy. You will give me credit for copying, and at such a time as this!
I congratulate your grace, and
I have the honour to be, &c., J. B.
Letter cxiij.
_To Mr L----._
[Private.]
London, St James's-street.
My dear Sir,
In the same moment you receive this, your lady, for whom I have the highest regard, will receive from me a valuable present, a packet of Lady Olivia ----'s letters to one of her French friends. These letters were lately found in a French frigate, taken by one of our cruisers; and, as _intercepted correspondence_ is the order of the day, these, with all the despatches on board, were transmitted to our office to be examined, in hopes of making reprisals of state secrets. Some letters about the court and Emperor of Russia led us to suppose that we should find some political manoeuvres, and we examined farther. The examination fortunately fell to my lot, as private secretary. After looking them all over, however, I found that these papers contain only family secrets: I obtained permission to send them to Lady Leonora L----, to ensure the triumph of virtue over vice--to put it into her ladys.h.i.+p's power completely to unmask her unworthy rival. These letters will show you by what arts you have been deceived. You will find yourself ridiculed as _a cold awkward Englishman_; one who will _hottentot again, whatever pains may be taken to civilise him; a man of ice_, to be taken as a lover from _pure charity_, or _pure curiosity_, or the pure _besoin d'aimer_. Here are many pure motives, of which you will, my dear sir, take your choice.
You will farther observe in one of her letters, that Lady Olivia premeditated the design of prevailing with you to carry her to Russia, that she might show her power _to that proudest of earthly prudes_, the d.u.c.h.ess of ***, and that she might _gratify her great revenge against Lady Leonora L----_.
Sincerely hoping, my dear sir, that these letters may open your eyes, and restore you and my amiable relation to domestic happiness, I make no apology for the liberty I take, and cannot regret the momentary pain I may inflict. You are at liberty to make what use you think proper of this letter.
I have it in command from my Lord ---- to add, that if your health, or any other circ.u.mstances, should render this emba.s.sy to Russia less desirable to you than it appeared some time ago, other arrangements can be made, and another friend of Government is ready to supply your place.
I am, my dear sir, Yours, &c.
_To F. L----, Esq., &c._