Rosmersholm Part 27

Rebecca. Yes, I do not see that I have any choice.

Rosmer. Let us make use of our last hour together. Come over here and sit beside me.

Rebecca (goes and sits down on the couch). What do you want, John?

Rosmer. In the first place I want to tell you that you need have no anxiety about your future.

Rebecca (with a smile). Hm! My future!

Rosmer. I have foreseen all contingencies--long ago. Whatever may happen, you are provided for.

Rebecca. Have you even done that for me, dear?

Rosmer. You might have known that I should.

Rebecca. It is many a long day since I thought about anything of the kind.

Rosmer. Yes, of course. Naturally, you thought things could never be otherwise between us than as they were.

Rebecca. Yes, that was what I thought.

Rosmer. So did I. But if anything were to happen to me now--

Rebecca. Oh, John, you will live longer than I shall.

Rosmer. I can dispose of my miserable existence as I please, you know.

Rebecca. What do you mean? You surely are never thinking of--!

Rosmer. Do you think it would be so surprising? After the pitiful, lamentable defeat I have suffered? I, who was to have made it my life's work to lead my cause to victory--! And here I am, a deserter before the fight has even really begun!

Rebecca. Take up the fight again, John! Only try--and you will see that you will conquer. You will enn.o.ble hundreds--thousands--of souls. Only try!

Rosmer. I, Rebecca, who no longer believe even in my having a mission in life?

Rebecca. But your mission has stood the test. You have at all events enn.o.bled one of your fellow-creatures for the rest of her life--I mean myself.

Rosmer. Yes--if I dared believe you about that.

Rebecca (wringing her hands). But, John, do you know of nothing--nothing--that would make you believe that?

Rosmer (starts, as if with fear). Don't venture on that subject! No further, Rebecca! Not a single word more!

Rebecca. Indeed, that is just the subject we must venture upon. Do you know of anything that would stifle your doubts? For I know of nothing in the world.

Rosmer. It is best for you not to know. Best for us both.

Rebecca. No, no, no--I have no patience with that sort of thing! If you know of anything that would acquit me in your eyes, I claim it as my right that you should name it.

Rosmer (as if impelled against his will). Well, let us see. You say that you have great love in your heart; that your soul has been enn.o.bled through me. Is that so? Have you counted the cost? Shall we try and balance our accounts? Tell me.

Rebecca. I am quite ready.

Rosmer. Then when shall it be?

Rebecca. Whenever you like. The sooner the better.

Rosmer. Then let me see, Rebecca, whether you--for my sake-this very night--. (Breaks off.) Oh, no, no!

Rebecca. Yes, John! Yes, yes! Say it, and you shall see.

Rosmer. Have you the courage--are you willing--gladly, as Ulrik Brendel said--for my sake, to-night--gladly--to go the same way--that Beata went!

Rebecca (gets up slowly from the couch, and says almost inaudibly): John--!

Rosmer. Yes, dear--that is the question I shall never be able to rid my thoughts of, when you have gone away. Every hour of the day I shall come back to it. Ah, I seem to see you bodily before me--standing out on the foot-bridge-right out in the middle. Now you lean out over the railing! You grow dizzy as you feel drawn down towards the mill-race!

No--you recoil. You dare not do--what she dared.

Rebecca. But if I had the courage?--and willingly and gladly? What then?

Rosmer. Then I would believe in you. Then I should get back my faith in my mission in life--my faith in my power to enn.o.ble my fellow men--my faith in mankind's power to be enn.o.bled.

Rebecca (takes up her shawl slowly, throws it over her head, and says, controlling herself): You shall have your faith back.

Rosmer. Have you the courage and the strength of will for that, Rebecca?

Rebecca. Of that you must judge in the morning--or later--when they take up my body.

Rosmer (burying his head in his hands). There is a horrible temptation in this--!

Rebecca. Because I should not like to be left lying there--any longer than need be. You must take care that they find me.

Rosmer (springing up). But all this is madness, you know. Go away, or stay! I will believe you on your bare word this time too.

Rebecca. Those are mere words, John. No more cowardice or evasion! How can you believe me on my bare word after today?

Rosmer. But I do not want to see your defeat, Rebecca.

Rebecca. There will be no defeat.

Rosmer. There will. You will never have the heart to go Beata's way.

Rebecca. Do you believe that?

Rosmer. Never. You are not like Beata. You are not under the influence of a distorted view of life.

Rebecca. But I am under the influence of the Rosmersholm view of Life--now. Whatever my offences are--it is right that I should expiate them.