From This Moment On Part 15

Ouch. It shouldn't have hurt to think of Marcus being in love with someone else, but it did. A lot. Which was why it took her longer than it should have to realize he hadn't actually said he loved his ex.

"Wait, you thought you did? So is that a yes or no?"

He frowned, shook his head. "No. I only loved the person I wanted her to be. But that wasn't who she really was."

"I know exactly how that is," she said before she could catch herself.

"You do?"

Six months fell away in the span of two simple words from the sweetest man she'd ever known, and she knew if she talked about Kenny she'd probably end up crying all over him and making a complete idiot of herself.

"I do."

He tipped his hand beneath her chin and made her face him. "Whoever he was, whatever he did to hurt you, he was the world's biggest idiot."

The tears she'd been hoping she wouldn't cry spilled out. "I was the bigger idiot for believing his lies."

"No, Nicola," he said as he gently wiped away her tears with the pads of his thumbs. "You could never be anything but bright and beautiful and absolutely perfect just the way you are."

His mouth covered hers a moment later and then he was making her forget everything but how good it felt to be in his arms...everything but the fact that she was so incredibly glad she'd been there at the night club to help him over his bad breakup, a little bit at least.

"Help me take my clothes off," she murmured against his lips.

His eyes glittered as he covered her hands with his and they pulled off her T-s.h.i.+rt together. Her bra came off next and he tossed both up onto the dry sand. Her jean skirt and panties came off just as quickly and then she was standing before him, completely naked.

And senselessly aroused.

Chapter Sixteen.

"Do you have any idea how beautiful you are?"

The biggest, most trusting eyes in the world looked up at him. "Only when you're looking at me like this."

Marcus put his hands on her hips and pulled her against him as his mouth covered hers without any restraint at all. Nicola kissed him back just as pa.s.sionately, her hands grasping at his clothes. Only breaking their kiss long enough to pull his s.h.i.+rt over his head, they were right back at it as they got his pants and boxers off.

His mouth still on hers, he lifted her into his arms again and walked into the surf.

A wave crashed up onto them and Nicola gasped at the cold. "Are you crazy?"

"When you're with me like this," he answered, "I think I must be."

She attacked him with her lips, planting kisses all over his face, his neck, his shoulders. He'd never been with someone so unrestrained, so ready to give in to her joy...and so willing to share it with him. The hours he'd spent with Nicola had been happier than any he could remember before her.

Yes, he'd been telling her the truth when he said he didn't regret any of the tradeoffs he'd had to make on his family's behalf. But he was glad he didn't have to make any of those tradeoffs now so that he could put Nicola-and his feelings for her-first these past few days.

"I want so badly to make love to you out here," she told him as she licked at his earlobe, "but we don't have any protection."

Marcus had to forcefully push aside the urge to be inside of her without anything between them. If this were more than a long weekend together they could get tested and- No. He needed to stay focused on here and now, on the fact that Nicola had already given him more pleasure in three days than any man should rightfully expect to have in one lifetime. She'd made it clear to him that she didn't want a relations.h.i.+p.

Just as clear as he'd made it to her, in fact.

That was when he showed her what he was holding. "I planned ahead."

She shook her head on a surprised laugh. "How the heck did you get this out of your pocket and unwrapped without my noticing?" Without waiting for his answer, she grabbed the condom from him. "Never mind. Just put me down so that I can do the honors."

Not sure he'd survive having her hot little hands on him, he warned her, "Don't even think about teasing me, kitten," as he put her back on her feet in the surf.

She blinked at him, all s.e.xy innocence and pure wicked intent. "How else am I going to know if you're ever going to make good on all those spanking threats?"

"Oh, I'll make good on them, all right," he told her, tempted to take care of her sweet round a.s.s right then and there, but then her tongue was coming out to lick at her upper lip as she focused her attention on his c.o.c.k.

"You're the beautiful one," she murmured as she dropped to her knees before he saw it coming and put her mouth over him, so hot and wet and perfect that he nearly shot into her mouth.

Jesus, he couldn't believe he was out in the ocean with the most beautiful woman on the planet sucking his d.i.c.k in the swirling surf. This wasn't him, wasn't what his life was like, wasn't any part of his plans.

f.u.c.k his plans, he thought as he slid his hands into her hair and decided to take what she was so happily giving him. He tightened his hold on her hair as she suctioned him with her cheeks and tongue. All the while, even as the pleasure of her mouth nearly took him over the edge, he watched her carefully to make sure he wasn't hurting her. Fortunately, he could tell from the s.e.xy little sounds she was making that she loved giving up her sensual control to him.

Waiting until his b.a.l.l.s tightened, drawing up tight to his body, a split second from losing it, he dragged himself out of her mouth.

"Put the condom on me, Nicola."

Her gaze was fuzzy as she blinked up at him, but she obeyed him with shaking hands.

Gritting his teeth against the sweet tug of her hands on his rock-hard shaft, he marveled at the way she completely gave up her body to him when they were making love. He wanted to be as good as the trust she gave him, wanted her to know she'd made the right decision in trusting him.

"Come here." He waited for her to take his hands and stand up before he said, "Wrap yourself around me." She jumped up to wrap her toned limbs tightly around him and he couldn't hold back his confession. "I love holding you like this."

"You can't possibly love it as much as I do," she said against his lips as he started walking deeper into the cold water.

"Oh G.o.d," she gasped as the surf pushed over her bottom, "that's really cold." Her big eyes flicked up to his. "You're going to have to work really hard to keep me warm."

"That's the plan," he said, and then after tucking the head of his c.o.c.k against her slick folds, "How's this working?"

"Mmm, pretty good. But," she held out one arm, "I still have goose b.u.mps." He pressed first one kiss, and then half a dozen, up her arm. "You're only making me s.h.i.+ver more," she said in a husky voice and he lifted his mouth from her soft skin.

"Maybe this, then?"

Their eyes held as he took her in one hard stroke.

"Oh." Her eyelids fluttered at the pleasure of coming together. "Yes. Just like th-" Her words broke off on a gasp of pleasure as he angled his hips to stroke over the most sensitive parts inside her.

Being with Nicola like this was as natural, as unstoppable as the tides. There was no ebb and flow to his desire for her, only a constant cras.h.i.+ng of need and want that kept dragging him deeper under her spell.

Her eyes glittered with emotion as she looked up at him and he could feel the dangerous pull of more than just bodies coming together in that moment as she held onto him, the sun illuminating her stunning beauty, the golden hue of her smooth skin.

For all his sensual demands, Marcus knew d.a.m.n well who was really in charge. Nicola had owned him from that first moment in the club when she'd looked into his eyes and claimed him.

She'd had his body from the first, but he'd been so sure his heart-his soul-were safe. That no woman could possibly touch him.

So then, why did being with her like this touch him as nothing ever had before?

And when, he had to helplessly wonder as their bodies took more pleasure from each other than he'd ever known, had hot s.e.x with his beautiful pop star turned into making love, even out on a beach beneath a sun that felt like it was s.h.i.+ning just for them?

Chapter Seventeen.

Laughing together as they put on their clothes over wet skin, they walked hand in hand up the beach to sit on the soft sand and plunder the contents of the bag Marcus had put together at the small Point Reyes corner store.

Nicola loved being with Marcus like this, sharing meals and sitting together, their legs touching as they ate and kissed between bites. She was frankly amazed to find that their picnic was in some ways even more intimate-and scary-than making love in the ocean had been.

When he'd been holding her, driving her insane with his kisses and caresses, she'd been so close, barely another kiss away from spilling what had been growing deep within her heart. But now, she had a feeling it might not take more than one of his beautiful smiles to send her all the way over the edge, way past no-strings to turning into one of those girls she'd teased him about earlier, wearing the wedding dress and knocking on his door.

Somehow, despite the fact that she was having the best day of her life, despite how sweet he'd been when he was telling her that her ex hadn't deserved her, she needed to remember to keep a firm hold on her heart at all times.

"So," she asked as she tore another chunk of bread off and dipped it in the red-pepper hummus, "how do you know about this place?"

"This was my father's favorite beach." She followed his gaze down the beach to a pretty cottage perched on the rocks. "His best friend from college owned that house and this stretch of sand." A shadow pa.s.sed over his face as he said, "Joe died a few years ago. He left my mother this place in his will, told her his best memories had been of all of us playing on the beach when we were kids. And that he hoped our grandkids would play like that one day, too."

Nicola had to move closer to Marcus, had to take his hands in hers and hold them over her heart as though she could give hers up for his if it meant she could take away all of the pain he'd had to deal with at such a terribly young age.

"Tell me about your father."

"He was great. There was never a day when we didn't know how much he loved us, how glad he was to have us all. Even when a bunch of us were fighting and yelling and calling each other names, he would sit back and let us work it out until we reached the point of no return."

"What did he do then?"

She was pleased to hear him chuckle softly. "He'd walk into the room and say 'It's over.'"

"That's it?"

He shot her a crooked grin. "He walked softly but carried a big stick."

"Sounds a lot like you."

"I used to think so."

She c.o.c.ked her head to the side. "What do you mean? You don't think you're going to be a great father?"

"I used to think that. I'm pretty much over the whole wife and kids thing right now."

There was absolutely no reason for his statement to hurt her. But the fact that the pop star he'd been boning could never possibly be under consideration for that role made her feel-for the very first time since she'd met him-cheap.

The sudden pain that slashed in past her breastbone made her careless enough to call him on what he'd just said. "So, just because some b.i.t.c.h you were dating cheated on you, you're giving up on having a family?"

His eyes flashed a warning that she decided to ignore. What the h.e.l.l, the hole she was digging was already so big she could pretty much bury herself in it. Why stop now? Especially if she was never going to see him again come Monday morning. She might as well try to help...even if Marcus really didn't want her to.

Yes, she decided, it was a purely altruistic thing she was doing by pointing this out to him. It wasn't at all that he'd hurt her and she wanted him to pay for it.

"All I'm asking is if it's occurred to you that maybe you chose a totally worthless ho to date so that you wouldn't have to face actually marrying her and starting a family? So that you wouldn't have to risk losing a woman you loved, the mother of your children, like your mother lost your father? You know, so you could use your ex as the reason to hide from love?" She shrugged, tried to act nonchalant. "Heck, that's probably why you chose me, too. Because it's easier to sleep with a totally inappropriate singer there is absolutely no chance of having a future with."

The silence was thick, almost cold, after she finished her point-by-point a.n.a.lysis of his life. Suddenly, she realized she'd never seen Marcus look at her like this before.

He was angry.

Angry with her for having told him what she thought.

Finally, he said, "What about you?" His eyes were narrowed, his jaw tight. "You could have anyone, Nicola. So why did you date a worthless liar that you probably knew would end up hurting you? Is it the same reason you think you need to fill some s.e.x-kitten image? The same reason you hide behind your body and your pretty face rather than letting people see how smart you are? And isn't that why you chose me, too, because I'm fun for a couple of nights, but we both know you'd never consider sticking it out with a boring old guy in a suit in a million years?"

She hadn't expected him to come back at her with that, with any of it, and she tried to take her hands from his, but he held them fast.

"You have no right to say those things to me."

"Don't throw stones if your own f.u.c.king house can't take it, kitten."

Oh G.o.d, she hated hearing him use that endearment now, when he was angry with her.

"Seems to me you're the expert on hiding," he told her in a low, hard voice. "Hiding from the press. Hiding how smart and talented you really are. Even in the bedroom, the last place in the world you should have been trying to hide yourself from your lover, I have to push every one of your b.u.t.tons to get you to drop your walls for a split f.u.c.king second."

She understood that she'd upset him with what she'd said, so much that he was actively trying to push her away. But that knowledge did nothing to douse her pain. If anything, it only made it worse.

Because she'd stupidly trusted him not to hurt her.

She yanked her hands from his grip and got to her feet in the sand. "Fine! You don't want me to hide anymore, then how about I stop right now?"

He stood up, too, facing her. "I dare you to try."

As the gauntlet crash down between them, she blurted, "How about I face up to the fact that I'm still the world's biggest idiot for believing that we could actually do this with no strings. How about I tell you that I knew better than to start falling in love with a guy who would never want me for anything more than a couple of days of hot s.e.x." Her breath was coming too fast and her vision was blurring with tears as she yelled, "How's that for smart?"

She had to turn away from him, couldn't bear to let him see her cry. Not now that everything was ruined and her perfect day had been crushed to smithereens.

And not after she'd actually gone and confessed her stupid feelings to him in the perfect way to make sure that he would never, ever return them.

Not, she knew, that he would have anyway.

"I need to go," she told him in a tight voice that she willed not to break. "My crew is going to be expecting me at the venue for sound check soon. I can't be late again like I was yesterday."

She headed toward the path between the pine trees that would take her back to his car. In the surf when he'd been holding her in his arms, despite how cold the water swirling around them had been, she'd felt so warm.