GroVont: Sorrow Floats Part 37

This was too civilized for me. I wasn't brought up to handle violence with "Now, now."

Armand came forward two more steps. "At least let me free you from the mud."

"Freeze," Shane ordered. "One more step and I blow your nuts off."

I said, "That's more like it."

"Thank you, Maurey. Now help me out of this mire."

"That's my pistol, isn't it?"

Took some pus.h.i.+ng and tugging-and pain in my burnt hand-but I finally got Shane back on the driveway and down the rest of the hill. I couldn't see my own face, thank G.o.d, but Shane looked in bad shape. He was coughing his guts out. Each cough spasm ended in what sounded like gagging, and I was scared to p.i.s.s he might pa.s.s out.

"You want me to hold Charley?" I asked.

"I am perfectly competent with a gun."

"I can't believe you stole him. Then you lied, you swore to G.o.d himself you didn't take Charley."

"Lying to alcoholics is mandatory, especially where firearms are concerned," Shane said.

Armand lurched ahead of us like a spoiled child. He even had hair growing out his b.u.t.t, the jerk. My greatest fear was that he might call a bluff and realize Charley wasn't loaded. We'd be in big trouble then.

"I'll never trust another sober man," I said.

Shane spit something up. "Aren't you glad now that I lied?"

I rubbed my hand over the top of his wet head. "You think because you're saving my life I'm going to forgive those ugly things you said?"

"Yes, I think so."

Back in the dry, lit barn, Arrnand stood over by the art nouveau junk pile, eyeballing me. He had the ugliest p.e.n.i.s I'd ever seen-looked like those Chinese handcuffs we played with as kids. He breathed at hyperventilation speed. Between the blood-pounding excitement and running, his pills must have been flat sizzling. A heart attack might be appropriate.

Shane kept Charley pointed at Armand, but he looked at me. "Holy Hannah, child, what did he hit you with?"

"You don't look so healthy yourself. Did you see a phone inside? Maybe I should call someone."

Armand gave a bark laugh. "Who could you call? The police are after you both."

Shane started to speak but went into a coughing fit that lasted thirty seconds and left drool hanging off the corner of his mouth. Finally he asked, "Did he rape you?"

"He was going to." I picked my torn s.h.i.+rt off the floor and wiped Shane's mouth. He smiled weakly at me.

"I wasn't going to rape her. Why should I rape something I'd already had?" Armand's voice was full of disgust.

Shane pointed the shaky gun. "You. Shut up." He took the s.h.i.+rt from my hand and gently dabbed my chin. It came away soaked in blood and dirt.

"Hold your pistol," Shane said. "It's time this villain paid for his sins."

I took Charley. "Let's charge the villain a lot. Beating me up should be expensive."

"If he'd raped you, I would have cut out his reproductive system."

Armand paled noticeably. I had the urge to point Charley at his crotch and pull the trigger, just to watch the jerk faint. "He f.u.c.ked me while I was unconscious last night. Is that rape?"

"What am I, a lawyer?" With effort, Shane wheeled toward Armand. "If he moves, shoot him."

"Gladly."

Shane stopped out of the line of fire. He motioned to one of the two tanks connected to the welding torch. "Place your foot up here."

Armand fastened his eyes on mine. "You can't hurt me. I'll call the police. She slept with me last night, and she stayed when you left. No court in Tennessee would convict me of rape."

"You're not going to court," Shane said. I saw him dig in his pocket. "Now put your foot here."

Armand's mouth formed a red sneer inside his black beard. "Look at her. She enjoyed what I did. She wants more. You always wanted a real man, didn't you, b.i.t.c.h."

He screamed and dropped like a stuck pig. Shane flashed that wicked little knife of his, said, "Banzai, motherf.u.c.ker," and leaned over Armand's writhing body. Five seconds later Armand screamed again, worse than when I stuck a hot welding torch to his t.e.s.t.i.c.l.es.

Shane turned the wheelchair a half circle and slowly made his way back across the floor. He held out his hand to show me two big toes, each with hairy growth behind the yellow nail.

Shane kind of sighed. "I always wanted just cause to do that. Being a cripple makes you mean sometimes."

I said, "Jesus Christ, will he die?"

Shane looked at Armand, who lay on his back, weeping and holding the ends of his feet with both hands. "Not if he seeks treatment. Are you aware if you slice the big toe off a person you effectively cripple him?"

"Armand had it coming."

Shane looked down at the toes in his hand. "I know. Still, if I weren't dying, I probably would have taken only one."

"You're not dying," I said.

Shane bent close over his hand. "Good Lord, Maurey, this toe has bite marks."

44.

"You definitely should seek professional treatment," Shane said to Armand. "The human body has only so much blood to give, then it runs dry."

For the advice, Armand's face returned hatred.

"Think he can drive a truck without toes?" I asked.

Shane hacked out a couple coughs and a spit. "Sure, he can drive. I knew a cowboy named Tim Butler, tried to commit suicide by sticking the barrel of a .410 over-under shotgun in his mouth and pulling the triggers with his toe. Shotgun backfired and snapped that toe like the pully bone off a turkey. Tim drove a stock truck sixty-two miles to a clinic in Cedar City, Utah."

I pulled up a milk crate and sat down. It was highly entertaining watching Armand crawl around trailing blood. He seemed to have lost his orientation.

"So where's the cowboy now?" I asked.

"Tim decided G.o.d blew off his toe instead of his head for a reason. He joined up with Church of Christ missionaries in Patagonia. The natives made him a set of viper-headed crutches that he's quite proud of."

Shane rolled over by Armand. "Listen closely, son. Go in the house and wrap clean cloths around your feet to clot the flow. Then take a couple of painkillers-do you have any painkillers?"

Armand didn't answer.

I said, "He's got more than enough painkillers."

"That's fine. Take your painkillers and drive into a hospital and tell the nice nurses you ran over yourself with a lawn mower. You don't want authorities involved in this any more than we do."

From his hands and knees, Armand stared up at Shane, who continued the lecture. "It's not the end of the world, son. Without your feet to hold you up, you shall grow a stronger base. Your life will be much fuller, spiritually speaking. Believe me, I have traveled the road and I know the destination."

If Armand could have killed, Shane would have been dead in a heartbeat. Instead, he began the long crawl from the barn to the house. As the worm slithered past me, I fought the urge to kick him.

I said, "That'll teach you to mess with women from Wyoming."

I don't think he heard me. Watching him grope his way across the mud, I thought of something. "You sure we should let him go? He has guns in there, at least the one he used on the cop tires."

Twin lines of blood followed Armand across the yard. Shane's eyes took on a reminiscent glow; I suppose he was thinking about his own lack of leg function.

"Your friend is in no shape for a shootout," Shane said. "Besides, we have Charley if he tries anything."

"Yeah, but Charley's not loaded."

I aimed Charley at Armand's hairy a.s.s as he pulled himself up the steps. He reminded me of road-kill badger.

"What makes you think Charley has no bullets?" Shane asked.

"h.e.l.l, any numbskull knows this gun's not loaded." I squeezed the trigger and-Boom!-Armand's porch light exploded over his head. The noise was terrific.

Shane said, "Simply because you can't buy bullets doesn't mean everyone can't buy bullets." He took Charley away from me.

A light came on up on the third floor. "Imagine him climbing all those stairs," Shane said. "The boy must be more resilient than I thought."

"His stash is on the third floor," I said.

"That explains it. Do you think he realizes the loss of his toes was a consequence of what he did to you? So few people connect actions with consequences. Take yourself, for instance."

"Aren't you too wet to pontificate?"

"Whenever a man saves a woman's life the rules say he must tell her how to live it."

"Does the woman have to listen?"

"Have you considered that losing your child and being beat to a pulp are both direct consequences of alcohol consumption? We're not talking bad luck here; everything that's happened happened because you are a sot."

I stood up. "You'll be sick if we don't dry you off. I'll look around, see if he hasn't got a rag pile or something."

"Denial is more than a river in Egypt."

"Yeah, right. You better move out of the doorway. Armand might be resilient enough to pull a trigger."

Shane's snicker rapidly deteriorated into coughing followed by violent s.h.i.+vers. As I moved through Armand's junky art, it occurred to me the situation might still be dire. I'd have a h.e.l.l of a time explaining to Lloyd how Shane saved my b.u.t.t, then keeled over dead. Where was Lloyd, anyway?

"Where is Lloyd, anyway?" I called.

"They're camped a mile or so back toward Chattanooga. Lloyd said we had to wait in case you came to your senses. I informed him you don't have any senses."

Armand had an amazing inventory of iron trash-everything from barbwire to girders. Several antique tractors had been disa.s.sembled back by the horse stalls. "So why are you here instead of Lloyd? No offense, but you're not built right to play cavalry."

Shane bent over to take off his shoes and socks. "I told Lloyd he should check on you, but he said you had to make the choice and take action. You had to save yourself."

"Then why let you come alone? Did he say 'Maurey's in trouble, go out in the rain and get sick'?"

"It wasn't raining when I left, and Lloyd doesn't know where I am. In case you haven't noticed, he's had maybe ten hours' sleep spread over the last five days."

"I haven't noticed much of anything lately."

"Everyone is lost in slumber, thus they won't know I'm gone until tomorrow. Lloyd hid the campsite most effectively. You'd never find it in the rain at night."

I looked back at Shane. "Is that your way of saying we're stuck here till morning?"

He raised his head. "My tube is filled with mud."

In a far corner of the barn I found a tack room full of riding saddles, horse blankets, and a few bridles. None of the saddles had been oiled recently, and spiders had spun webs in the stirrups. Seemed kind of strange to have all this gear and let it go to pot. One of the saddles was a kid's English rig. I couldn't imagine a scenario that fit a man living alone in a big mother of a house with all this horse equipment he seems to have walked away from. Sam Callahan would have come up with a story, but he basically lives in his fantasies. I've always been more of a reality woman.

Time to behave like a reality woman. Shane, the b.u.m, was right. My ribs burned when I breathed, my b.r.e.a.s.t.s were covered with dried blood, my back felt as if someone had hammered on my lower spine, and, worst of all, I still didn't have Auburn. And every single misfortune was my own d.a.m.n fault.

s.h.i.+t.

The weird thing is at that moment I didn't need a drink. You'd think a person who dealt with the daily humdrum by staying soused would race to the bottle after major violence. Maybe major violence was too much trauma even for Yukon Jack. Lying on my back on the concrete, looking up as that hairy monster dropped his pants and prepared to rape me-something inside had died. Or gone away. The powerlessness changed something.

I lifted a horse blanket and looked down on the hugest set of jugs I'd ever seen. This floozy on a magazine cover crawled toward the camera with her tongue hanging out like a thirsty dog and-no lie-her t.i.ts dragging the floor. It was disgusting. She had hair the color of Armand's toenails. The wh.o.r.es of Memphis were rank amateurs compared to this hard-a.s.s woman. Shane would love it.