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I've watched you with Prince Talasin, for instance, and if you'd given him the least amount of encouragement he would have buried you in flowers. Prince Garam is another story, of course, but he's the sort to walk over flowers without even seeing them. Master Lokkel would happily share some of the deepest secrets in Healing Lore if you asked about them, and Ranander may well decide to risk life and limb in order to win you. Me, I complain about being insulted or ignored, but you don't see me riding next to someone else, do you?"
"I think we've already established that you shouldn't be running around loose," I answered, wondering why I was wasting my time with that nonsense. "And that, of course, doesn't even count the fact that you have another reason for hanging around. Talasin has felt sorry for me right from the beginning, Garam is delighted that he can use my abilities in his tactics, and Lokkel is interested in anything that lets him show off his healing techniques. As far as Ranander goes, he considers me a friend and therefore wants to share s.e.x with me. The camp women must have befriended him before I came along, so his extending the urge to me isn't hard to understand. That about covers it, I think, and in a slightly more reasonable way than you used."
"I hadn't realized that 'reasonable' was a word to be subst.i.tuted for 'mule-headed blindness,'"
he came back, now sounding annoyed. "Do you really believe that if you refuse to acknowledge the truth about something it will stop being true?"
"Only if it's someone's opinionated version of the truth," I countered, catching his annoyance.
"Do I really look so backward and simple in your eyes that you think you can tell me anything and I'll believe it? Men want pretty women, and the stronger the men are, the more they can indulge the preference. If they happen to be involved in something where no pretty women are available, they'll make do as best they can. Not find attraction elsewhere, simply make do. To believe anything else is to believe a child's story."
"A child's story," he echoed, his stare hardening. "By definition that has to be something you can't bring yourself to believe in. You're not attractive to yourself so you can't be attractive to anyone else. Did it never occur to you that not everyone in this world has to see things the way you do? That some might have opinions different from yours and also - "
"Enough!" I p.r.o.nounced, finally sick of his constant disagreement. "Enough spoken, and enough heard. The next word you speak to me had best be challenge, for in that way do I mean to take it. Not warned, but promised."
I met his eyes squarely before kicking my horse into faster motion, and as I rode away I had the definite feeling he'd understood perfectly. He'd probably never before heard a Silence Challenge, but he'd been able to see I wasn't joking. My people really disliked being bothered, and that included being buried under an avalanche of words. There were a lot of reasons why the Kenoss were both respected and feared, and the fact that we kept our word was just one of them.
I rode alone for the rest of the day, feeling Ijarin's eyes on me but only from a distance. Since I was riding ahead of him, the longer we rode the harder I had to be to see. Marching west into sundown does a good job of accomplis.h.i.+ng that, and west was definitely the direction we were going. I spent some time wondering which direction we would take once we turned, then forgot about it. For me, one direction was as good as another; when we turned, I'd have my question answered.
Our front-riders contacted our first half just about when they expected to, and a little while after that we were together again. Ranander and Lokkel and a very heavy escort hadsurrounded the coach carrying the twin girls, Talasin had led our half of the force, and Fearin had spent his time going back and forth between Talasin and the coach, the Power occasionally crackling around him. He'd been ready for anything, but the anything had played it smart and not shown up.
The camp spread out a short distance from the Harn river, past the tree line and across the meadowland that lay there. The city had used a portion of the closer meadowland for grazing its herds, but we were beyond that point. For a while the area was a bedlam of shouted orders, guardsmen running to obey, horses being unhitched or unsaddled, tents going up. My tent suddenly appeared with the others, certainly by courtesy of Fearin, and when I rode over to it I found something else. A lower-grade guardsman stood in front of the tent, trying not to look nervous.
"G'day to you, lady," he said as he looked up at me, his body trying to decided whether or not to stand at attention. "The High Master says I'm to tend your horse, and to remind you about supper in his tent. You got just enough time to wash some dust off first."
"How very generous of the High Master to allow me that," I said as I began to dismount.
"Maybe I ought to send you back with the question of which dust I'm to wash off and which to leave."
"Lady?" he queried as he took my reins, having no idea what I was talking about. "You want me to ask him what?"
"Never mind," I said with a headshake and a gesture. "I'll tell him myself when I see him.
Where will you be picketing my horse?"
"Right over there," he answered, pointing leftward of my tent. "Don't you worry, we'll take good care of him for you."
He gave my horse a pat and me a rea.s.suring smile, then he walked away to do the taking care of he'd promised. It had taken me that long to realize it, but Fearin must have found the one guardsman in the entire army who hadn't heard the stories about me. The man had been nervous at first, but only because I was one of the inner group running that effort.
I spent a short time inside my tent, feeling out of sorts in a way I couldn't understand, but it wasn't possible to stay there and think about it forever. If Fearin hadn't had Diin-tha backing his decisions... But he did have the G.o.d behind him, so I had no choice about taking the man's orders. I would be having the meal with him, and that was that.
Walking toward Fearin's tent showed me most of the furor had died down, and I found a surprise when I entered. I'd thought I was the only one who had been ordered to the meal, but the presence of everyone else destroyed that a.s.sumption. Lokkel and Talasin already sat on the weaving with cups in their hands, Garam was filling a cup of his own, and Ranander was inspecting the array of food set up not far from the drinks. The only one not immediately to be seen was Fearin, but I was no more than two strides into the tent when he entered behind me.
"All right, the girls are finally settled down," he announced, looking and sounding sour. "They think they're holding a grand feasting for the royalty of the entire world, and the heavy guard around them believes they're guarding victims of a terrible disease. If anyone gets into the tent, the disease will spread to the guardsmen as well."
"You were able to do all that?" Talasin asked with a look of surprise while everyone else just stared. "But what happens if one of the girls tries to come out, or some of the other men tell the guard the truth?"
"The girls know if they try to leave that tent they'll become absolutely common," Fearin answered as he walked toward the table holding wine. "And the members of the guard already know the truth. It's everyone else who doesn't know, to be certain that panic doesn't start to spread. Those men have a very important job, and they're proud to do it."
Fearin took his time pouring a cup of wine, and we just sat or stood there considering what he'd said. I knew very little about the use of Power, but I'd never heard of anyone doing the sort of thing he'd done. Fearin wasn't simply Powerful, then; he was also creative, which made himeven more than usually dangerous...
"Does anyone know why Prince Ijarin is late?" the man of Power suddenly asked. "Did he somehow miss getting my invitation?"
"He - ah - decided he'd prefer to take the meal with his men," Talasin answered, looking only at Fearin. "I'm sure you know he had twenty men waiting for him outside the city, and they're now riding with the army."
"He also said something about it being better for everyone if he stayed away for a while,"
Lokkel contributed, frowning with the effort to recall something that wasn't involved with healing. "Surely you remember, Prince Talasin? It had something to do with good health."
Talasin smiled faintly without moving his eyes to Lokkel, Garam buried his face in his wine cup, and Ranander abruptly turned back to give all his attention to the food table. I'm sure Fearin saw every one of those reactions, but the only one he looked directly at was me.
"Tell me what you did," he said, and the words weren't really a question. "I want to hear about it now, not when I talk to our Guardian."
"I just gave him a ritual Silence Challenge," I answered with a shrug that wasn't as casual as I'd wanted it to be. For some reason that hard blue stare was making me so uncomfortable...
"It isn't as though I didn't put up with everything I could be expected to take first. He refused to stop bothering me, so I spoke the ritual."
"Which entails what?" Fearin demanded, obviously annoyed with Garam's badly hidden amus.e.m.e.nt. Talasin was also amused, and Ranander was looking admiring again.
"It ... declares that the next word he speaks to me will be taken as a challenge no matter what it happens to be," I said, trying not to s.h.i.+ft where I stood. "Kenoss don't use it much anymore, but only because most people have learned not to bother us."
"Don't worry, Fearin, our Guardian won't be asking you why he left," Garam said with the laugh he could no longer hold down. "No matter what she says to him, he keeps coming back for more. From the way he watches her move, I'd bet gold he'll keep coming back - at least until he gets what he wants. He's obviously staying away to give her a chance to cool down, and then he'll be back at her again. You can't say barbarians give up easily."
"Back at her," Fearin echoed with a frown, and then he was looking at me again. "Just what is it that he wants from you?"
"Judging from his actions, he wants to turn me deaf and berserk," I said, refusing to mention that idiotic prophecy. "He never stops talking, and it's driving me crazy."
"Ten gold to ten copper he'll soon be suggesting the best way to keep him silent," Garam said with a grin. "He expects you to be so desperate by then that you'll give him exactly what he wants. I don't think he knows yet what you can give him in place of that."
"Which isn't the usual option offered to a man," Talasin agreed with his own grin. "Ijarin has a lot to learn about our ex-slave."
Everyone chuckled while Fearin continued to frown, and then the man of Power shook his head.
"We can go into this further some other time," he said. "Right now we have a campaign to discuss, so let's fill our plates and get on with it. Tomorrow the men will have to have it explained to them."
That last comment did well with getting everyone's mind off the barbarian. Explain what to the army? Garam and Talasin tried to find out immediately, but Fearin refused to change his mind.
He waited until all of us had taken plates of food to places on the floor weaving, and then he began the discussion that had undoubtedly decided him against having anyone serve us.
"A number of people, including some of you, have been asking about the direction we'll be turning off in," he began, giving a lot of attention to his food. "Right now we're moving west, but everyone knows we can't continue west much longer. Less than three days ahead of us lies the Valley of Twilight, and no one moves through there even with an army. The army would be lost, along with those who marched it in."
He paused to chew then, acting as though no one was staring at him, and Garam was the first toput our sudden conviction into words.
"You mean that's the way we are going?" our strategist demanded, trying not to show how insane he considered the idea. "I seriously doubt that the men will follow, even if it's Talasin who tells them about it. Not all of the Twilight Runners are human, and there can't be a man in the files who hasn't heard the stories. Human and nonhuman compete to see how many trespa.s.ser trophies each can collect, and the trophies aren't something to mention even in unmixed company. If we try to march that way we'll lose every man even before we reach the Valley."
"That's why you'll have to make them understand we'll have safe pa.s.sage," Fearin said, finally looking up first at Garam and then at Talasin. "Once we're closer I'll be taking a small group ahead to arrange that safe pa.s.sage. We have something to trade for our safety that King Sallain has been looking for for seasons and seasons. I've been a.s.sured he won't refuse, and once we have his word he'll keep it."
"You've been a.s.sured," Garam said with obvious relief, then didn't bother adding to the words.
We all knew who had given Fearin the a.s.surance, and there was nothing to say. If Diin-tha said it would work, then it would work.
Fearin went on to talk about supplies, and marching formations, and sentry arrangements, and the distribution of more of the gold. A bonus would be paid the guardsmen after they were told about the Valley of Twilight, a large enough amount to be impressive, but not so much that men would be tempted to take the gold and disappear. Fearin wanted the men eager for the next bonus, which would come once they marched out of the Valley again.
Garam tried twice to find out what we had that could be traded for safe pa.s.sage, but when Fearin ignored the delicate questioning he gave it up. Going through the Valley instead of around it would save us more than a full moon of travel, and would bring us to our destination long before we could reasonably be expected to arrive. No one needed Garam to point out how strategically useful that would be, so even if it cost most of the gold and silver we'd acc.u.mulated the edge would be more than worth it.
We worked our way through a lot of food and planning, me doing no more than listening and eating, and finally the talk died down. There would need to be more discussion during the following days, but for right now they'd gone as far as they could.
"So I tell them during the midday stop tomorrow," Talasin said with a final, distracted nod. "If I make the speech short and the groups large, it shouldn't take forever to get to all of them.
The ones who have questions will be invited to see me in night camp, when I'll be able to go into more detail."
"With all of them being told at the same time, the rumors will hopefully be at a minimum,"
Garam fretted, rubbing at his face. "If we can keep them until the next dawn, we won't have to worry about desertions."
"Don't forget to keep mentioning how Powerful I am," Fearin said, sounding as though he were talking about someone else entirely. "Stress the fact that I won't have any trouble arranging our safe pa.s.sage, hint at what might happen to those in the Valley if they even think about refusing me, and remind the men they won't be going in until the deal is done. What you won't put into words is what I might do to any guardsman who deserts his post to run."
"After what you did with the city, they don't need it put into words," Garam said with a sound of amus.e.m.e.nt, Talasin smiling and nodding in agreement. "They also know what you did to those five who tried to take the plunder wagons and sneak off. I saw seasoned veterans shudder when they heard, which means the point was well made."
"And if I'm going to be making my own points tomorrow, I'd better get some sleep," Talasin concluded, beginning to rise to his feet. "Men have trouble putting their faith in you when you stand there yawning in their faces."
"Just to be on the safe side I'll get my own men ready for possible trouble," Garam said, also climbing to his feet. "They'll be useless if the entire army panics, but if it's just individuals hereand there they can stop the panic before it spreads."
"We'll all do best with a good night's sleep behind us," Fearin agreed, leaning down to a cus.h.i.+on with his cup of wine rather than rising. "We'll meet again tomorrow in night camp, when we'll know better how things are going."
Lokkel and Ranander also stood, but the Healing Master stopped near Fearin to ask a question. I was able to see that much before my range of vision was blocked - by a pleasantly smiling Ranander.
"I'll walk you back to your tent, Aelana," he said, extending a hand to help me up. "I've been doing some thinking, and I have a couple of suggestions for you to consider. If you don't like them, we can talk about how they need to be changed so you do. I'm willing to be reasonable."
His smile widened to a grin, and he didn't seem to mind that I hadn't taken the hand he'd offered. I'd thought I'd done a fairly good job discouraging him, but suddenly he was acting more self-a.s.sured than discouraged. That added itself to the rest of the confusion I'd been feeling lately, and I couldn't think of anything to say in answer. Before the situation became awkward, though, Fearin handled it for me.
"Ranander, Aelana won't be going back to her tent just yet," he said, surprising me, at least, by having heard our conversation rather than being in the midst of his own. "She and I still have a Silence Challenge to talk about, not to mention a few other subjects, like a tendency to disappear without a word to anyone. I'm afraid you'll just have to wait your turn."
"You won't be too hard on her, will you, Fearin?" Ranander turned to ask, suddenly concerned.
"Prince Ijarin was bothering her, and he isn't even her friend. And I'm sure she'll be willing to promise not to disappear again. She just didn't understand how worried everyone would be."
"I'll be as hard on her as I would be on any of the rest of you," Fearin answered, standing to face the other man more directly. "You're not suggesting I treat her as anything other than a full member of our group, are you? That would be very unfair, since a full member is exactly what she is."
"Oh, I know that," Ranander agreed immediately. "But she's also special, Fearin, really special, and you should all be telling her how much you admire her. None of you has ever before met someone like her."
"We know," Fearin answered with a quiet smile, coming over to put a hand to the other man's shoulder. "We all do admire her, but we're not very used to saying the words. I suppose that means you'll have to say them for us. You don't mind, do you?"
"Of course not," Ranander said with a wide grin. "I have lots of words, and I'll give them to her later. I'll see you later, Aelana."
I was standing by then, so all I did was nod as he marched happily past me and out of the tent.
Once he was gone I sighed, and then was surprised to find I wasn't the only one doing it.
"Poor Ranander," Talasin said low. "He really has it bad. I'm afraid you're in for some bother, Aelana."
"She can handle it," Garam said just as low, but with complete a.s.surance. "After a while he'll get the message, and if he doesn't she can always ask us to talk to him. Fearin would be better still, but Fearin needs his full cooperation. The rest of us will just have to take care of it."
As they pa.s.sed, Garam gave my backside a gentle, encouraging smack, and then the two of them were gone. Lokkel paused to pat my shoulder and say, "Patience, child. It will all work out," and then he, too, was gone. I turned around to find Fearin looking at me with faint amus.e.m.e.nt, and that was almost too much.
"How does it feel to have that ardent an admirer?" he asked, showing the talent most men have that makes a bad situation worse. "If I'd said I was going to punish you, I think Ranander would have volunteered to take the punishment for you."
"I hadn't realized you considered him your type," I answered with a shrug, goaded into the comment by all that amus.e.m.e.nt. "Now that I know, I'm sure we'll be able to work something out. There's no sense in having my own tent if I'll never get to sleep in it."At first he didn't understand what I was talking about, but then the confusion left him along with the amus.e.m.e.nt.
"You're trying to suggest that my lovemaking is punishment," he stated, a dark look in his blue eyes, and then the look lightened a little. "Isn't it strange that I never noticed you suffering. If someone had asked me, I would have sworn you'd enjoyed yourself."
"Don't all men think that?" I asked with another shrug, turning toward the food table to get rid of my empty plate. "Ranander has been telling me I'll enjoy myself with him since the first day we met. Maybe I ought to try him, just to see if he's telling the truth. And, incidentally, to finally get rid of him."
"You'll have to learn there's a difference between opinion and actuality," Fearin returned dryly from behind me. "Ranander was expressing opinion, his own, actually, and your indulging him is no guarantee he would lose his infatuation. Speaking from my own personal experience, he would probably come back for more."
"Because he's bored with the camp women," I said with a nod, beginning to feel depressed.
"As long as I'm the only other available female, I'll be better than them even if I'm not. Has anyone ever mentioned before how strange you men are?"
"The only ones who mention that are people looking for a fight," he answered. "Or women looking to avoid a different fight. Are the others right? Is Prince Ijarin trying to get you into his bed?"
"The others have to be suffering from the same disease Ranander is," I said with a sigh. "Or that all of you are. Ijarin thinks they're interested in me, they think he is, and you're all out of your minds. I'm not of interest to anyone but our Guardian, and his interest doesn't include a bed."
"Don't be so sure," was the murmured response from right behind me, and then two hands were turning me to face him. "G.o.ds are notorious for their appet.i.tes, almost as notorious as mortal men. I know you don't yet understand how that works, so let me put it as plainly as possible. If Prince Ijarin announces his interest, I want you to refuse him. If he continues to press you, refer him to me. Do you understand?"
I smiled very faintly as I nodded, understanding perfectly. Fearin didn't want anyone interrupting his pleasure, but he also didn't want to lose Ijarin. If it became necessary he would use diplomacy, and everything would be smoothed over.
"Good," Fearin said with a nod of his own, a smile accompanying the hand touching my face.
"That means there's no more need for Silence Challenges or anything like it. Be polite to him, but not overly friendly. I'm the one I want you to be friendly to."
He grinned at that and tapped my nose with one finger, then turned and strode over to retrieve his wine cup. Once he had it he went toward the table holding the wine, the energy fairly crackling out of him.
"Where do you get the strength to keep going like that?" I couldn't help asking, remembering how much slower the others had been moving. "After all the Power you used today, you should be completely drained."
"Why?" he countered, glancing at me briefly over his shoulder. "The Power doesn't come from me, all I do is use it. Didn't you know that?"
As a matter of fact I hadn't known that, and he must have seen the answer in my expression when he turned back with his wine cup refilled.
"Look, it's very simple," he said, pausing only for a small sip. "The Power is there for anyone with the knowledge to use it, but gaining the knowledge isn't easy. It takes seasons and seasons before you learn enough even to begin, and then you face the most difficult part of all: the handling of the Power. Anyone with enough knowledge can handle the Power, but surviving it isn't that simple."
"Power can hurt the one using it as well as the one on the receiving end?" I said, my brows raised high. "I've never heard that before, at least not put exactly that way.""I know," he agreed with something of a grin. "What's usually told outsiders is that we're the dangerous ones, that the Power does everything we tell it to. That may be true of those who develop the skill of handling, but until they do get that far they're much more dangerous to themselves."
"Why?" I asked, trying to understand what he was telling me. "Once you have the knowledge to control Power, you should be able to do anything you like - including keeping yourself safe."
"Only if you really understand what it means to handle Power," he corrected. "Power doesn't come from the user, but it does have to be channeled through him. He gathers the Power and then casts it in the direction he wants it to go, but it has to be the right amount. If he gathers more than his body can stand having channeled through it, he'll do more damage to himself than to whatever his target is."
"But - that doesn't make any sense," I protested, suddenly remembering all the things he'd done. "You can't be risking yourself every time you do more than you did the last time, it would be like running blind. No one would take the risk to be really Powerful."