The Outsider: Hard Knox Part 13

The morning sun glowed around him, framing his head in a yellow halo. If that wasn't irony . . .

"Well, no, I can't be with you all the time. Campus security frowns on guys following girls into the women's bathroom, not to mention your professors probably wouldn't be too eager to see Knox Jagger squatting in on their cla.s.ses."

Imagining Neve's face when she noticed Knox in her Journalistic Ethics cla.s.s almost made me laugh out loud.

"But in a way, I will be with you everywhere you go."

My brows knitted together. "I don't understand."

"Once this douche learns you're living with me and a.s.sumes we're a thing, he'll be less brazen. He's going to triple-think his moves when he knows I could be around any corner."

Rolling onto my side, I propped my head up with my hand. "And brazen wasn't roofie-ing me while I was handcuffed to you?"

The closest thing to a sheepish expression went into place on his face. "He was drunk or driven by extreme emotion-or something else that made him forget caution. I guarantee you he won't make the same careless mistake again. He'll be more sneaky, hanging even farther back in the shadows, which means you need to be ten times more on guard."

"Good thing I've got you and your shadow following me around," I said under my breath. I'd have been lying to myself if I said I wasn't worried. That someone was targeting me specifically, and seemingly relentlessly, didn't do anything to convince me that this would all blow over soon.

"I don't want to deceive you, Charlie. Moving in with me isn't a guarantee that you'll be safe. There's still a risk out there; we're just decreasing it. We're buying time. This isn't fool-proof, and there's still danger out there just waiting for you to make a mistake."

I allowed myself two full breaths to let the fear have its way with me. I gave myself that time to feel the adrenaline firing inside me. Then I let it all out with one long exhale. "Where would the fun be if my life weren't in danger every now and then? Danger keeps a girl on her toes." Sure, I was exaggerating my confidence, but fake it till you make it, baby.

"Not to be cra.s.s, but I don't think this guy's interested in you staying on your toes."

Staring at the ceiling, I moved on from the topic at hand. Where and how this guy wanted me was not a welcome thought. "Not that I'm agreeing to this insane idea, but let's just say I'm considering it . . . is there anything else we need to go over?"

From roommates, to ch.o.r.es, to t.u.r.ds-we'd covered a gamut of topics.

"Just one more thing-one important thing." I could feel Knox waiting for me to look at him. He waited until my eyes met his before continuing. "What happened last night . . ." He chewed the inside his cheek for a beat. "I want you to know that will never, ever happen again." Even as he said it, his gaze dropped to my mouth. "I just don't want you to be worried or feel uncomfortable living here because a repeat of that could happen. Contrary to popular belief, I can behave myself when I really put my mind to it."

I wasn't sure what to say, but he was clearly waiting for me to acknowledge what he'd just said. Was I as conflicted over what had happened last night as he was? I doubted it. Was I so certain I never wanted a repeat of it to take place? Not even. Was it a mistake? I couldn't be sure yet. I guess it was truly a matter of only-time-will-tell.

"Oh. Okay. Sure." My gaze drifted back to the ceiling because looking at him only confused my thoughts more. "Thanks for that . . . oath?" I squinted. That wasn't the right word. "For that promise?" Closer but not quite. "For that-"

"Solemn vow," he filled in, his voice strong. He sat up even higher, and his free hand curled around the crucifix dangling at his chest. "I swear on this that I will never let that happen again."

Well, I guess that confirmed it. Knox's and my relations.h.i.+p had gone as far as it would ever go. If he was throwing out solemn vows and swearing on religious relics, he was pretty much writing a message in the sky that a repeat of what had gone down between us would not be happening. To him, it must have been a mistake.

"Great. I'm convinced." As the flood of emotions drained out of me all at once, something else made its way to the front of the queue. The handcuffs binding us only made it seem that much more urgent. "Eh . . . Knox?" My foot tapped frantically.

"Eh, what?" he replied.

"Nature is calling again"-I'd found myself in this same bladder-bursting predicament last week-"and from the feel of it, won't be patient." Seriously, it was like a whole gallon of lemonade had just been funneled into my bladder. Maybe it was another effect of the drugs, or the fact I just hadn't gone pee in close to twelve hours, but whatever was responsible for it was also about to be responsible for making a mess on Knox's couch. I supposed that would be one way to get the roommate invitation revoked. House-breaking seemed kind of standard when it came to roomie requirements.

His gaze drifted down my stomach right before moving to the cuffs. "Well, lead the way. I'm next on nature's call list."

I popped up and swung my legs over the couch. "I am not peeing with you in the same room. No way."

"Why not? I wouldn't hesitate to go with you close by."

"That's because you're an animal."

"If I was an animal, I wouldn't use a toilet."

Both my feet were tapping now as I looked over my shoulder toward where the bathroom was. "So you're a particular animal, but either we can go in search of those bolt cutters-quickly-or we can keep arguing about this, and I'll make you wish you'd invested in plastic seat covers like our great-grandmas did."

"That's a new couch. I'd appreciate it if you didn't do anything that would make me have to go furniture shopping again. After my last experience, I'm pretty convinced that h.e.l.l is going to be the inside a furniture superstore."

I crossed my legs to see if that would help. From the feel of it, nothing would help other than reliving myself. "Then what are we waiting for?" I went to stand, but Knox stayed put, bringing me right back down on the couch.

"For you to agree to be smart and move in until we get this guy."

I whipped my head from side to side. "That's too big of a decision to make in my present state. After I heed nature's call, I'll do some more considering and give you my answer."

"Yeah. That doesn't work for me."

Knox stayed put when I went to stand again. "So help me G.o.d, I will drag you to the garage if I have to in order to find those bolt cutters." I glared at the handcuffs, wondering if there was anything I despised more. The person who was trapped in them with me was in the running for that honor.

"So do it." He smiled at me. Actually smiled.

"You're going to regret that when I go all bionic-woman on you," I warned. I grabbed his handcuffed wrist in my free hand and, making sure I had a good hold on it, pulled.

He barely budged, still smiling. "I expected more from the bionic woman."

Hoping my anger would bolster my strength, I braced myself, got an even better grip around his wrist, and gave it my all. I pulled on him so hard, a few grunts actually slipped past my lips, and the only movement I managed out of Knox was his smile turning up.

"d.a.m.n it, move!" I shouted.

"You got it. As soon as you agree to move in, I will willingly move."

"Knox!" That was all I had left-nothing other than screaming his name in frustration as I collapsed back on the couch.

"Charlie," he whispered, making it clear he wasn't going to be sucked into a screaming match, "the choice is yours."

In my adult life, I'd never been so close to wetting my pants. As tempting as it was to teach him a lesson and ruin the couch, I had too much dignity for that. Or just enough. "f.u.c.k!" I bounced in my seat from frustration and trying to keep p.i.s.sing my pants off of today's to-do list. "Fine! I'll do it!"

"You'll do what?" He looked ready to lope a victory lap as he dug around for something in his pocket.

"I'll move in with you. Temporarily," I added. At that point, I would have agreed to anything-running naked through a hornet's nest included.

"See? Was that so hard?" Whatever he'd pulled from his pocket was small enough to hide in his hand.

"Harder than I could ever express or you could ever imagine. Now, bolt cutters. Where the h.e.l.l are they?"

Knox held up what looked like a straightened paper-clip before he lowered it to the lock of my cuff. "Who needs bolt cutters when I'm"-after a twist of the paperclip, followed by a little wobble, the cuff sprang open-"a pro at busting out of handcuffs?"

Knox was already working the lock of his cuff free when what he'd just done registered. I threw my hand toward the paperclip. "You had that thing with you the whole time?"

"I never go anywhere without one of these things," he said with a casual shrug as the cuff sprung free from his wrist. "You never know when you might find yourself in a tough situation."

"You had that thing with you the whole time, knew how to use it, and kept us cuffed together just so you could get me to agree to move in here?" I was already backing down the hall toward the bathroom, but I wanted him to see the look on my face.

"For a so-called great journalist, you're kind of slow on the uptake." Knox dangled the cuffs before winking and stuffing them into his back pocket. In addition to being panty holders, they were also a handy place to store handcuffs.

Instead of glaring at him like every fiber of me was dying to do, I smiled-a wide one that was all teeth and batting lashes. "You know what? I'm glad I'm moving in here."

Knox's face went blank with surprise as he stood. "Oh yeah?"

"Oh yeah. Because murdering you in your sleep will be so much easier now."

"I SAID TO pack some, not all." I froze in the doorway of my dorm room, gaping at what Knox had managed to get done while I showered and brushed my teeth. I'd been gone twenty minutes, maybe thirty, but other than the top dresser drawer I'd told him not to even think about getting close to he'd packed the rest of my stuff into the stack of cardboard boxes beside the door. Other than Harlow's side, the room looked almost as empty and sterile as it had the first day I'd moved in.

"I know how you girls are," Knox said, dropping a final box beside the others. He'd even marked the boxes in black Sharpie-this one read: Books and s.h.i.+t. "If you didn't pack it, you'll wish you had. If you don't have it, you'll need it. Better to just bring it all than make a million trips back and forth."

No need to worry about making trips, because other than my mini-fridge, hand-held vacuum, and paper chain, none of my personal items were staying behind. "Oh, I'm sure you know how girls are. I just figured your knowledge ended at the anatomy and didn't stretch into the psyche."

"The man wh.o.r.e jokes have got to stop. I've heard them all, and yours are nowhere close to being the most clever ones out there. Know when you're beat, Charlie Chase."

After adjusting a few more boxes-all of which read something to the effect of Pants and s.h.i.+t, or Coats and s.h.i.+t, or Junk and s.h.i.+t (which seemed a bit repet.i.tive) -Knox looked at me. His expression changed into the one that made my stomach do a whirly-Q-immediately followed by a dive bomb.

"What?" I stopped toweling my hair dry.

"Nothing," he answered after a pause, heaving several boxes into his arms and heading through the door. "I'm going to take another load down to the truck. I'll be right back."

"Another load?" Surely I hadn't packed that much stuff into my parents' mini-van when we'd left for Sinclair in the fall.

"You've got a lot of s.h.i.+t," Knox's voice boomed from down the hall.

"And the black Sharpie to prove it," I muttered, waiting until Knox had disappeared into the stairwell before I rushed toward my dresser. From the looks of it, no unwanted guests had been rifling through the top drawer, but that didn't mean Knox hadn't kipped a peek. If he hadn't, his name wasn't Knox Jagger.

After grabbing my duffel bag from the closet, I stuffed panties and bras by the armload into it like I was in a race against the clock. When Knox and I drove to campus after I'd finally gotten to pee for what felt like an hour-followed by me resisting the urge to coldc.o.c.k him for basically tricking me into agreeing to move in, followed by his peace offering in the form of fresh coffee and ham and cheese omelets-we'd had to park about as far out in the parking lot as a person could get from the dorm. Knox would be gone at least ten minutes, so I didn't know why I was about to break into a sweat from packing my underwear, but I was almost paralyzed by the thought of him seeing them. Not because they were nothing like the kind that wound up in his back pockets, I rea.s.sured myself a few times, but because . . . because Knox didn't have the right to anything else personal when it came to me. He'd finagled me into leaving my dorm, he'd witnessed me writhing in nature-calling agony, he'd held my hair while I'd unloaded the contents of my stomach-he didn't get to bear witness to one more personal piece of me. However, that reason took a bit more effort to sell to myself than it should have.

I'd just stuffed my last sensible beige bra into the bag when someone popped inside the doorway. I jolted so hard that I managed to thump my funny bone into the dresser. "Ouch!" I dropped the bag so I could rub my elbow. "So not a funny bone."

"Do you need a hug?" Harlow leaned into the doorjamb, giving me the perfect balance of a smile and a smirk.

Harlow had an edgy name and dressed the part, but all that edge couldn't hide that she'd been raised a Southern Belle. You could take the girl out of the debutante ball, but you couldn't take the debutante out of the girl. Her effortless curtain of cornflower hair, her easy and perfect-no exaggeration-smile, and her face that was meant to be sighed at wistfully could not be marred by whatever knotted, slashed-up band s.h.i.+rt she'd pulled on or whatever holy-h.e.l.l-that's-bright! shade of lipstick she used. It didn't stop her from trying, but it seemed like the harder she tried to disguise her roots, the more they broke through the surface.

"What I need is a stiff drink, but since I can't seem to sip anything around this campus without wondering if some tiny white pill might have been dissolved in it, I guess I'll settle for a hug." I opened my arms, and Harlow skipped across the room. When she threw her arms around me, she squeezed me so hard a whoosh of air rushed from my mouth.

"I can't believe this is happening," she said, smelling like magnolias and sweet tea . . . even though she wore perfume that came from a black bottle with a leather cap. North Carolina simply couldn't be rinsed off of the girl.

"Tell me about it. You're not the one who's moving in with Knox Jagger." After that morning's events, I wouldn't have felt particularly bad about going back on my word. He'd pretty much tricked, bribed, and tortured me into agreeing to move in, so reneging on my promise didn't seem like that big of a deal.

But there was one big reason why I didn't. Or maybe two. First, living with him and being in his so-called element would give me the perfect opportunity to figure out just who he was and who he wasn't. Whatever secrets or shadowed past Neve was convinced Knox was hiding could all be found somewhere in his personal s.p.a.ce if there was anything to find. Second-and I'd never admit it to him-I was scared. Not in a crippling capacity, not even in a paranoid one-yet-but I'd definitely gone from fearless to fear-more after my second roofie experience. Living off campus and having Knox a room away-a guy who was well-known for putting a guy out cold with one hit-gave me a measure of peace.

"Oh, I didn't mean I can't believe this is happening in regards to you moving in with Knox-although, h.e.l.lo, let's get back to that in a moment. I meant I can't believe some d.i.c.k is messing with you like this." Harlow rubbed small circles into my back just like my mom would have if she'd been here. It was one of the many things I loved about my roommate . . . or my old roommate. She took better care of me than I did.

"We're talking about Knox, right?"

Harlow held my shoulders, giving me one of her looks. "I'm talking about the other d.i.c.k messing with you-the one who's making it a habit to drop an illegal substance into your drinks."

"Oh, that d.i.c.k," I said, nodding. "There's just so many in my life right now, it's hard to keep up."

"Stop making jokes for two minutes." Harlow wandered over to the mini-fridge. "Do you have any idea who it might be?"

"Some d.i.c.k?"

"The jokes. Enough with them." Harlow pulled a couple of sodas from the fridge and tossed one my way. It wasn't a stiff drink, but some sugar and caffeine couldn't hurt.

"Sorry, I can't accept drinks from anyone. Friend or not." I was already opening the tab.

"And after all of the trouble I went through lacing it with poison before hermetically sealing it right back up." Harlow popped her soda open and took a sip. "There's ten hours of my life I'll never get back."

"And I thought I was being accused of making light of a serious situation," I muttered before taking a drink.

"Being crammed into this room with you for the past couple of months and a different room all of last year means more than just your wide smile has rubbed off on me."

"And I'd hoped it would be my evil plans for world domination that rubbed off on you." I rolled my fingers against my soda can. "Because, after all, every depraved dictator needs a trusty sidekick."

"Whatever." Harlow tossed one of her pillows at me. "I'm no one's sidekick. However, I will throw in my application if the position of criminal mastermind ever opens up."

The idea of Harlow doing anything illegal, even tossing an apple core from a moving car, was enough to make me laugh. I would miss our daily chats about nothing. I would miss the ones about those harder-to-breech somethings too. Harlow had become my confidant, one of the few people I could count on. When I heard a sigh slipping from my mouth, I reminded myself that this was only a temporary move. The faster I figured out who was after me and just who Knox was, the faster life could get back to normal.

"So? Any ideas who this dillweed is?"

Dillweed? Yeah, not one of my top choices for describing the puss-filled sc.u.m-of-the-earth. "No clue. None. Which is such an ideal place to be when trying to narrow down a list of suspects."

"G.o.d, I can't believe someone's doing this to you. When Knox called me this morning-"

"Yeah, sorry about that. He doesn't really have a discretion meter." I plopped down on my bare bed and tucked my legs under me.

"I'm not. I would have been p.i.s.sed if he hadn't called me. You really need to stop acting like this is grade school and some kid's pulling a lame prank on you. This isn't a prank, and it isn't something to take lightly." Harlow set her soda on her nightstand, and her sparkling blue eyes locked on me. "This is about attempted rape."

I bobbed my head from side to side. "Well, nothing's been attempted, so . . ."

"Fine," Harlow's voice was shaking. She didn't scream and holler like the rest of us, but I could tell she was getting p.i.s.sed when her voice took on that shaky tone. "Then it's about someone drugging you. That's known as a felony where I come from. So please explain why you're expecting me to treat this like it's no big thing?" A couple of tears looked close to spilling from the corners of her eyes.

Harlow cared about me, and as inconvenient as that might have been at this conversation juncture, I wouldn't repay that care with more att.i.tude. "Listen, you're right. I know I'm in some deep, deep s.h.i.+t here. I know someone's after me and what they're probably planning to do if Knox isn't ever lying in wait one night. I even know what could happen if the sick b.a.s.t.a.r.d slips one too many pills into my orange juice. I know what's going on, and I know the danger . . . I just can't let it cripple me."

After setting my soda down, I combed my fingers through my hair and relaxed my head into my hands. Talking about getting drugged and raped was just as crippling as thinking and fretting about it. "If I don't come at this thing with my typical ho-hum Eeyore att.i.tude, I'm done. I'll hide behind a steel door until this guy is caught, and I refuse to live as a victim. This guy wants me to be scared, so I'll be fearless. He wants me to feel threatened, so I'll be carefree. He wants me to feel cornered, so I'll be boundless. He wants me to feel like a victim, so I'll play like I'm the victor . . . until the day I figure out who he is, get the sick f.u.c.k arrested, and really am the victor. Playing his game with one of my own is the only way I'll make it through this. If it helps you to know that I'm close to p.i.s.sing my pants in fear, then yes, I'll admit that to you, but don't expect me to admit it to everyone else." When I glanced up, her whole face had softened, and she looked about to go all nurturing mother on me again. I added, "I can only confess these types of character flaws to my trusty sidekick, after all."

She sniffed, wiping at her eyes. "Just when I want to take my Econ book and try to thump some sense into you, you go all up close and personal on me." She popped off her bed, waving her arms at me. "Come on, girl. Let's hug it out."

"Isn't that just what we did?"

"Fine. If you won't meet me halfway, then I'll go the distance." With a giggle and a leap, Harlow tackled me, throwing me back on my bed as she unleashed one giant bear hug on me.

"Go the distance?" a low male voice said from the doorway. "The exact three words every guy wants to hear when walking into a room where two girls are wrestling and giggling on a mattress."