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FLAT STANLEY.
Stanley and the Magic Lamp.
by Jeff Brown.
Prologue.
Once upon a very long time ago, way before the beginning of today's sort of people, there was a magical kingdom in which everyone lived forever, and anyone of importance was a genie, mostly the friendly kind. The few wicked genies kept out of sight in caves or at the bottoms of rivers. They had no wish to provoke the great Genie King, who ruled from a palace with many towers and courtyards and gardens with reflecting pools.
The Genie King was noted for his patience with the high-spirited genie princes of the kingdom, but the Genie Queen thought he was much too too patient with them. She said so one morning in the throne room, where the King was studying reports and proposals for new magic spells. patient with them. She said so one morning in the throne room, where the King was studying reports and proposals for new magic spells.
"Discipline, that's what they need!" She adjusted the Magic Mirror on the throne room wall. "Florts and collibots! Granting wishes, which they'll be doing one day, is serious work."
"Florts yourself! You're too hard on the lads," said the King, and then he frowned. "However, this report here says that one of them has been behaving very badly indeed."
"Haraz, right?" said the Queen. "He's a real real smarty!" smarty!"
The Genie King sent a thought to summon Prince Haraz, which is all such a ruler has to do when he wants somebody, and a moment later the young genie flew into the throne room, did a triple flip, and hovered in the air before the throne.
"What's up?" he asked, grinning.
"You are!" said the Queen. "Come down here!"
"No problem," said Haraz, landing.
"It seems you have been playing a great many magical jokes," said the King, tapping the reports before him. "Very annoying annoying jokes, such as causing the army's carpets to fly only in circles, which made all my soldiers dizzy." jokes, such as causing the army's carpets to fly only in circles, which made all my soldiers dizzy."
"That was a good one!" laughed Haraz.
"And turning the Chief Wizard's wand into a sausage, while he was casting a major spell? You did that?"
"Ha, ha! You should have seen his face!"
"Stop laughing!" cried the Queen. "This is shameful! You should be severely punished!"
"He's just a boy, dear, only two hundred years old," said the King. "But I'll-"
"Who knows what more he's done?" The Queen turned to the Magic Mirror. "Mirror, what other dumb jokes has Haraz played?"
The Magic Mirror squirted apple juice all over her face and the front of her dress.
"Ooooohh!" The Queen whirled around. "Florts and collibots! I know who's responsible for that!"
Prince Haraz tried to look sorry, but it was too late.
"That does it!" said the Genie King. "Lamp duty for you, you rascal! One thousand years of service to a lamp." He turned to the Queen. "How's that, my dear?"
"Make it two thousand," said the Queen, drying her face.
1.
Prince Haraz Almost a year had pa.s.sed since Stanley Lambchop had gotten over being flat, which he had become when his big bulletin board had settled on him during the night. It had been a pleasant, restful time for all the Lambchops, as this particular evening was.
Dinner was over. In the living room, Mr. Lambchop looked up from his newspaper. "How nice this is, my dear," he said to Mrs. Lambchop, who was darning socks. "I am enjoying my paper and your company, and our boys are studying in their room."
"Let us hope they are," said Mrs. Lambchop. "So often, George, they find excuses not to work."
Mr. Lambchop chuckled. "They are are imaginative," he said. imaginative," he said.
In their bedroom, Stanley and his younger brother, Arthur, were were doing homework. They wore pajamas, and over his, Arthur also wore his Mighty Man T-s.h.i.+rt, which helped him to concentrate. doing homework. They wore pajamas, and over his, Arthur also wore his Mighty Man T-s.h.i.+rt, which helped him to concentrate.
On the desk between them was what they supposed to be a teapot-a round, rather squashed-down pot with a curving spout, and a k.n.o.b on top for lifting. A wave had rolled it up onto the beach that summer, right to Stanley's feet; and since Mrs. Lambchop was very fond of old furniture and silverware, he had saved it as a gift for her birthday, now only a week away.
The pot was painted dark green, but streaks of brownish metal showed through. To see if polis.h.i.+ng would make it s.h.i.+ne, Stanley rubbed the k.n.o.b with his pajama sleeve.
Puff! Black smoke came from the spout. Black smoke came from the spout.
"Yipe!" said Arthur. "It's going to explode!"
"Teapots don't explode." Stanley rubbed again. "I just-"
Puff! Puff! Puff! They came rapidly now, joining to form a small cloud in the air above the desk. They came rapidly now, joining to form a small cloud in the air above the desk.
"Look out!" Arthur shouted. "Double yipes!"
The black cloud swirled, its blackness becoming a mixture of brown and blue, and began to lose its cloud shape. Arms appeared, and legs, and a head.
"Ready or not, here I come!" said a clear young voice.
Now the cloud was completely gone, and a slender, cheerful-looking boy hovered in the air above the desk. He wore a sort of decorated towel on his head, a loose blue s.h.i.+rt, and curious, flapping brown trousers, one leg of which had snagged on the pot's spout.
"Florts!" said the boy, shaking his leg. "Collibots! I got the puffs right, and the scary cloud, but- There!" Unsnagged, he floated down to the floor and bowed to Stanley and Arthur.
"Who rubbed?" he asked.
Neither of the brothers could speak.
"Well, someone someone did. Genies don't just drop in, you know." The boy bowed again. "How do you do? I am Prince Fawzi Mustafa Aslan Mirza Melek Namerd Haraz. Call me Prince Haraz." did. Genies don't just drop in, you know." The boy bowed again. "How do you do? I am Prince Fawzi Mustafa Aslan Mirza Melek Namerd Haraz. Call me Prince Haraz."
Arthur gasped and dived under his bed.
"What's the matter with him?" the genie asked. "And who are you, and where am I?"
"I'm Stanley Lambchop, and this is the United States of America," Stanley said. "That's Arthur under the bed."
"Not a very friendly welcome," said Prince Haraz. "Especially for someone who's been cooped up in a lamp." He rubbed the back of his neck. "Florts! One thousand years, with my knees right up against my chin. This is my first time out."
"I must have gone crazy," said Arthur from under the bed. "I am just going to lie here until a doctor comes."
"Actually, Prince Haraz, you're here by accident," Stanley said. "I didn't even know that pot was a lamp. Was it the rubbing? Those puffs of smoke, I mean, that turned into you?"
"Were you scared?" The genie laughed. "Just a few puffs, I thought, and I'll whoooosh whoooosh up the spout." up the spout."
"Scaring me me wasn't fair," said Arthur, staying under the bed. "I just live in this room because Stanley's my brother. It's his lamp, and he's the one who rubbed it." wasn't fair," said Arthur, staying under the bed. "I just live in this room because Stanley's my brother. It's his lamp, and he's the one who rubbed it."
"Then he's the one I grant wishes for," said Prince Haraz. "Too bad for you."
"I don't care," said Arthur, but he did.
"Can I wish for anything?" Stanley asked. "Anything at all?"
"Not if it's cruel or evil, or really nasty," said Prince Haraz. "I'm a lamp genie, you see, and we're the good kind. Not like those big jar genies. They're stinkers."
"Wish for something, Stanley." Arthur sounded suspicious. "Test him out."
"I'll be right back," Stanley said, and went into the living room.
"Hey!" he said to Mr. and Mrs. Lambchop. "Guess what?"
"Hay is for horses, Stanley, not people," Mr. Lambchop said from behind his newspaper. "Try to remember that."
"Excuse me," Stanley said. "But you'll never guess-"
"My guess is that you and Arthur have not yet finished your homework," said Mrs. Lambchop, looking up from her mending.
"We were doing it," said Stanley, talking very fast, "but I have this pot that turned out to be a lamp, and when I rubbed it, smoke came out, and then a genie, and he says I can wish for things, only I thought I should ask you first. Arthur got scared, so he's hiding under the bed."
Mr. Lambchop chuckled. "When your studying is done, my boy," he said. "But no treasure chests full of gold and diamonds, please. Think of the taxes we would pay!"
"There is your answer, Stanley," said Mrs. Lambchop. "Now back to work, please."
"Okay, then," said Stanley, going out.
Mrs. Lambchop laughed. "Treasure chests, indeed! Taxes! George, you are very amusing."
Behind his newspaper, Mr. Lambchop smiled again. "Thank you, my dear," he said.
2.
The Askit Basket "I told them, but they didn't believe me," Stanley said, back in the bedroom.
"Of course they didn't." Arthur was still under the bed. "Who'd believe a whole person could puff out of a pot?"
"It's not a pot pot," said Prince Haraz. "Now please come out. I apologize for the puffs."
Arthur crawled from under the bed. "No more scary stuff?"
"I promise," the genie said, and they shook hands.
Arthur could hardly wait now. "Stanley! Try a wis.h.!.+"
"We can't," Stanley said. "Not till our homework is done."
"What's homework?" asked Prince Haraz.
The brothers stared at him, amazed, and then Stanley explained. The genie shook his head.
"After schooltime, when you could be having fun?" he said. "Where I come from, we just let Askit Baskets do the work." schooltime, when you could be having fun?" he said. "Where I come from, we just let Askit Baskets do the work."
"Well, whatever they they are, I wish I had one," said Stanley, forgetting he was not supposed to wish. are, I wish I had one," said Stanley, forgetting he was not supposed to wish.
Prince Haraz laughed. "Oh? Look behind you."
Turning, Stanley and Arthur saw a large straw basket, about the size of a beach ball and decorated with red and green zigzag stripes, floating in the air above the desk.
"Yipes!" said Arthur. "More scary stuff!"
"Don't be silly," said the genie. "It's a perfectly ordinary Askit Basket. Whatever you want to know, Stanley, just ask it."
Feeling rather foolish, Stanley leaned forward and spoke to the basket. "I, uh ... that is ... uh ... Can I have the answers for my math homework? It's the problems on page twenty of my book."
The basket made a steady huuuummmm huuuummmm sound, and then a man's voice rose from it, deep and rich like a TV announcer's. sound, and then a man's voice rose from it, deep and rich like a TV announcer's.
"Thank you for calling Askit Basket," it said. "We're sorry, but all our Answer Genies are busy at this time. Your questions will be answered by the first available personnel. While you wait, enjoy a selection by the Genie-ettes."
Stanley stared at the Askit Basket. Music was coming out of it now, the sort of soft, faraway music he had heard in the elevators of big office buildings.
Prince Haraz shrugged. "What can you do? It's a very popular service."
There was a click click and the music stopped. Now a female voice, full of bouncy good cheer, came from the basket. "Hi! This is s.h.i.+reen! Thanks a whole bunch for waiting, and I would like at this time to give you your answers. The first answer is: 5 pears, 6 apples, 8 bananas. The second answer is: Tom is 4 years old, Tim is 7, Ted is 11. The third-" and the music stopped. Now a female voice, full of bouncy good cheer, came from the basket. "Hi! This is s.h.i.+reen! Thanks a whole bunch for waiting, and I would like at this time to give you your answers. The first answer is: 5 pears, 6 apples, 8 bananas. The second answer is: Tom is 4 years old, Tim is 7, Ted is 11. The third-"